This chapter is more Sonicky (Is that even a word?!)

I do not own Sonic the Hedgehog and I do like Shadow, it's Tails I hate :]

I also do not own Yu-Gi-Oh! or Yu-Gi-Oh! Abridged

Sonic casually strolled up to Tails, a mischievous grin planted on his face. Tails was busy researching Extreme Gear (for once) and didn't notice anything. He typed quickly, the keys on his computer clicking away like mad. Sonic, noting this, sneaked up behind Tails and put his hands on his shoulders. Tails screamed and jumped a foot in the air.

"What did you do that for?" he asked once he had landed on the floor.

"Cuz I love you," Sonic replied. The look on his face then can only be compared to a rape face. Tails noticed this and tried to run away but Sonic caught him.

"Oh no you don't!" he shouted at Tails.

"Help!" Tails screamed. "Sonic's trying to rape me!" Sonic tied a gag round Tails' mouth and chained him to the wall.

"First things first," he whispered into Tails' left ear. "Your lab is soundproof and you installed the equipment for that yourself. No one can hear you. Even if they could, there is no one in this area who would help you"

Tails tried to scream through the gag but only produced a muffled buzzing sound. He started to cry, salty tears sliding into his mouth. This made him want to throw up. He tried to stop it as the gag would just hold it in. Meanwhile, Sonic had his back turned to the kitsune. He was doing something producing metallic scratching sounds. Tails' eyes welled up with tears again. Sonic turned round and looked at Tails with a slasher smile on his face. In his hand he held a 30cm knife and looked like he was intending on doing something to Tails with it. Tails screamed . . .

. . . and woke up in his armchair in his lab. He looked at his Joey plushie and sighed.

"Just a nightmare," he whispered to Joey. "Nothing to worry about, Joey" The plushie looked at him blankly.

"Joey!" he screamed, throwing the plushie away. "I hate you! I hate you so much! I don't love you anymore! Why don't you die?!" Immediately after blurting this out, he started crying and scuttled across the floor to where the plushie lay. "I'm so sorry!" he apologized, picking Joey up and tickling his tummy the way he liked it. "I really do love you! I just got mad, that's all. Probably too much time spent around Knuckles"

"You are so weird" a voice said. Tails turned round and saw that Sonic had been stood behind him the whole time. "You treat a plushie like they're alive. I hate to break it to you but your Joey plushie is not Joey Wheeler"

"Loads of people do that," Tails muttered in self-defence. "Sonikkuruzu does that"

"Yes but as you can probably see from the state of this fanfic, she is mentally unstable. Like you"

"My mind functions perfectly, you ferret!"

"I AM NOT DRACO MALFOY YOU INSIGNIFICANT LITTLE, I can't think of a word, POO!" Sonic screamed. He ran out of Tails' lab, tears running down his face.

"I definitely prefer you to my friends," Tails murmured lovingly to the plushie.

Four hours later after watching Top Gun ("It's so not gay!") and reading some lemon fanfics ("Yummy Knuxadow lemon!" Tails had said), Tails was sitting on his armchair with his feet up on a desk.

"I enjoyed our evening. Did you, Joey?" he asked the plushie, stroking his hair. The plushie said nothing as per usual. Tails decided to ignore the Joey plushie and instead looked at a big red button. It was approximately the size of Tails' hand and was bright scarlet. It was shiny and had a plaque next to it clearly stating that it was not to be pressed. Tails being Tails (kinda obvious :|) decided to press it.

"No! Tails! Don't!" the Joey plushie suddenly yelled, punctuating it for emphasis. Tails ignored it and pressed the button. The explosions cause by it was so graphic I don't know how to describe it. It would blow your minds, not that I'm suggesting your minds are small and insignificant because they are definitely not!

Back to the story. Tails stared at his Joey plushie.

"Y-you speak?" he stuttered nervously, aware of the flames that had popped up around him and the plushie.

"Of course I do, you dumb broad!" the Joey plushie snorted. Tails stared at the plushie with disdain, ignoring the flames.

"Two things," Tails said, glaring at the plushie. "I am not a girl"

"Of course you're not," the Joey plushie muttered, its voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Second, why are you Abridged?" Tails asked.

"It's simple, you idiot. Sonikkuruzu only knows how Abridged Joey talks so she wrote me like this," the plushie yelled, waving its tiny arms around.

"There really is no fourth wall, is there?" Tails asked the plushie.

"Nope," the plushie cheerfully replied. "Hel-"

"Knuckles did that last chapter," Tails interrupted. "Sorry" The plushie glared at Tails.

"You retard," it said spitefully. Tails stared at the plushie and threw it as far away as he could.

By now, the fire had filled the entire lab except where Tails stood. The plushie screamed as it fell into the flames. Tails jolted as if he had been in a trance. He looked at the flames licking up the walls and started to cry as he knew there was no chance of him surviving. He screamed his little head off and would have carried on screaming of someone hadn't carried him out of the burning building. Tails felt someone pick him up and run with him out of the burning building, leaving the evil plushie behind or so he hoped . . .

Ten minutes later, Tails decided to see who had saved him. Opening his eyes, he expected to see Sonic. He was disappointed as he saw Shadow.

"Oh, " he said, the disappointment obvious from the tone of his voice. Shadow promptly dropped the plushie (he had rescued it too, much to Tails' disappointment) on Tails and started to sprint off.

"Shadow!" Tails shouted. The black and red hedgehog turned round and looked at the whiny kitsune.

"What?" he asked, exasperated.

"Why did you rescue me?" Tails asked, staring at the burnt plushie in disdain.

"Because I'm invincible!" Shadow bellowed. Tails looked at Shadow curiously and carefully selected his words.

"Sorry, Shadow," he started whispering. "But you're not invincible"

"WHAT?!" Shadow shrieked.

"Your chest fur is on fire," Tails murmured.

Shadow looked down at his chest fur and noticed that Tails was not lying. He gazed at the flames, horrified then started running around in circles screaming. Tails raised his left eyebrow, murmured "fascinating" and walked off. The plushie stared at the Ultimate Life Form acting like an idiot and walked back into the fire.