AN: If you find any mistakes with what I have written, please do tell me, I would love to hear it and I will try to make those changes.
Stepping out of the elevator Gojyo wanted to run and wrap his arms around Hakkai. He wanted to beg Hakkai to take him home. Wanted to tell him that this wasn't his idea. It pained him he couldn't do that. He knew all too well what would happen if he tried.
He had to keep them believing he had become someone else, otherwise, they would do what they had threatened at the beginning. They had told him when he was fighting against them they would kill Hakkai and make sure he watched them do it. They had showed him the room they would put him in to watch them kill Hakkai, slowly and painfully. They told him Hakkai would have no idea Gojyo was watching his death and Gojyo would not be able to stop it. He could scream all he wanted, there would be no way Hakkai would hear him. He knew that would destroy him. He knew he would be an empty shell at that point.
They had even taken him into town to where Hakkai was. He figured it had been about two weeks or so after since being taken. They had him pumped full of drugs, leaving him unable to move or speak. The back windows were tinted so no one could see in and there was a sheet of plywood between him and the front seats. The man was next to him pointed out the two men that were following Hakkai. Gojyo knew these men would take Hakkai from the crowded streets and they would most likely be the ones that would kill Hakkai.
He knew he couldn't let it happen, if it was in his power to stop. Knowing that Hakkai was still alive would be some comfort for him, not much, but maybe just enough to withstand what they were trying to do to him. He knew that the only way he would have a chance of seeing Hakkai again would be to let them think they had him believing that he was another person.
He knew he would have to keep himself in check In order to keep the nightmare they had promised from becoming reality.
"Make it look like you just went down there to have a smoke. Make it seem like you haven't seen that man yet." said one of the men through the comm.
He took out the pack which he kept in the breast pocket of his suit jacket and fished out his lighter from another pocket. The one and only thing he could be moderately pleased with was they hadn't tried to make him quiet smoking. It was the only thing he could really take comfort in, since he wasn't allowed to spend all day looking at his eyes in the mirror and having Hakkai's eyes staring back at him.
He placed the cancer stick between his lips and lit it, taking a long drag while his mind went back to the days Hakkai would get mad at him for using a beer can as an ashtray. He fought from to keep a smile coming to his face. He stood there taking in what little enjoyment the smokes would bring him and waited for his next set of instructions.
He kept Hakkai in the corner of his eye and watched him come closer slowly. He didn't have to wait long before the voice said, "Walk slowly and lazily towards him. You don't really care that he's here, even though he is trespassing." Gojyo heard a little snicker from the other man in the room. They were enjoying this way too much.
He knew if he had taken to the procedure they had tried on him, he wouldn't care who this person was, but he had the feeling Hakkai had been tricked to come here, for some sick joke at both of their expense. However, he followed his instructions.
He watched the slow recognition of his identity dawn on Hakkai's face. It was torture to watch and unable tell Hakkai who he was. As he walked closer he found it really difficult time not to give it away he was still of his own mind.
He finished the cigarette by the time Hakkai asked, "Go-Gojyo is that you?" Gojyo could hear the uncertainty in his voice. Hearing the uncertainty was hard to stand and it was even harder not to react to.
Gojyo wanted to say yes, but he had to wait till he was given instructions on what to say. He knew they would have some kind of script for him to follow. Hakkai had barely finished speaking when the voice was back, "Give him your name and tell him you don't know who he is talking about."
Gojyo started speaking before the men had finished, just so there wasn't any delay between Hakkai's question and his answer, "That isn't my name. If you need to know for future reference it's Kenren."
Gojyo really wished he wasn't wearing the contacts; he couldn't give a slight look to tell Hakkai it was him. He couldn't convey anything without being obvious and then they would know for sure.
He watched the fear and disbelief come to Hakkai's face. He so badly wanted to wipe that off of Hakkai's face. He wanted to scream with how hard this was turning out to be. At the same time he had to give the sick bastards sitting a few floors up some credit. This was a good way to see if he had taken to the procedure. They never took into account the one thing that would allow him to fight off what they tried, was the person standing in front of him. For him knowing that Hakkai was alive and he know that Gojyo just didn't disappeared, there was a chance to be found. That gave him something to hold onto, something to fight them with.
The voice wasn't going to stay quiet very long; he hated the leash they had him on, "We have to prove a point to this man, so do what we want you to, even if you might find it a little off." He didn't really know what they were talking about, "You have to kiss him like he is your lover." He was more than willing to do that, but he knew they were just being cruel to Hakkai. This was going to hurt Hakkai more when he knew what else they were going to ask him to do.
Even though he was going to have to be part of this cruelty, there was no way that he could say no. To keep up the appearance of being someone else he knew that he would have to talk to them about this. Wrapped his arms around Hakkai brought him into a kiss. He tried to bring in everything he felt for Hakkai. There was no way it should've felt that good, knowing the pain that he was going to cause. He felt a pang of guilt when Hakkai started to kiss him back.
"Break the kiss and return the leather wrist band." He could hear soft laughter in the background; they seemed to be getting off on this. He didn't want to stop kissing Hakkai. He wanted it to go on forever. They really knew how to be cruel. He knew this would've brought up Hakkai's hopes up and giving him the leather wrist band was the worst kind of cruelty.
His whole body wanted to protest against the voice, he didn't want to do that, he knew what it would do to Hakkai. He broke the kiss reluctantly when he thought he wouldn't be allowed to prolong it without getting in trouble. He took a hold of Hakkai's hand and it felt as though everything moved in slow motion as he placed the leather band into Hakkai's hand. He felt his heart shatter and his breath caught. "I think this belongs to you." He said as indifferently as he could. It was the only way that he could get anything out.
It was even harder to watch Hakkai's facial expression. He wanted so badly to tell him, in some way, this wasn't his doing, he was being forced to do this.
"Why?" Hakkai began to ask over and over again, it made everything worse. He couldn't say anything.
"Say goodbye and meet her by the elevator and then leave." The voice said.
He leaned over and gave him a kiss goodbye. This was the only chance that he had to include a personal message, "I'm sorry. This isn't my choice, forgive me." he said as quietly, in a voice that only Hakkai had heard before.
He turned and headed towards the elevator. He heard the ding in the silent room just as he reached the doors. Out stepped the woman that they had set up as his partner. He gave her a kiss on the cheek and placed his arm around her small waist. He walked both of them to the door next to the elevator. She neither looked at Hakkai nor acknowledged his presence. Once they were close to the door he heard a soft click of the door unlocking. The men were going to make sure Hakkai couldn't follow.
"Gojyo? What's going on?" Hakkai called after him.
He knew that he shouldn't look back, no he couldn't look back. He wouldn't be able to stand looking at Hakkai's face. He would most likely lose it, then there would be trouble. The only thing he could do was call over his shoulder, "My name is Kenren, not this Gojyo you seem to be confusing me with."
Pulling the door open he let the woman go first. As the door closed behind him he heard the lock engaged. Hakkai wouldn't be able to follow.
Shortly after he heard the door juddered, he wanted to go back to open it for Hakkai. He heard his name being called; it was torture being unable to do anything. All too soon for Gojyo, Hakkai stopped calling his name and everything went silent.
They kept walking down the hallway; he hadn't been given anymore directions. Going through the doors at the end of the hallway, they entered into streaming sunlight.
Gojyo have to cover his eyes. It was the first time that he had seen sunlight in several months. He no longer had tanned skin. He hadn't noticed how bad it until he stepped out into the sunlight and now looked like a ghost with how pale he was.
As the two of them stood there waiting for some kind of instructions, a black car pulled up and the driver motioned for them to get in. After the woman got in and Gojyo slid in. He didn't know where he was going. If they were taking him away from here, he figured he had passed the test. He would now have the chance to figure out how to get free from their control. He wasn't sure if he should really try because he felt like he just lost the only happiness that he had ever known.