Chapter 7

"So," said Hedgely, after helping me up from the floor, "do you feel better now that you've spoken to your parents?"

I nodded. Despite Mum's collapsing at the sight of my face among a pit of burning coals, I knew that she and Dad were alright and they knew I was safe.

"Can I contact them again soon?"

"Maybe not by the floo network, it could be dangerous, with Death Eaters roaming free and all that, but you could send them an owl."

I remembered when our house in Privet Drive had been covered with owls, trying to deliver letters to Harry, when we were eleven. Dad had hated birds ever since, but I supposed he would have to learn to live with lots of things that he hated now.

"Dudley?"

Professor Flip stuck his head through the door.

"There you are! I've been looking all over for you! Ahh, I see you've met Hedgely. I'm sure you'll be the best of friends!"

He grinned the same insane smile he had used when I'd first arrived here.

"Hedgely, why don't you take Dudley to the kitchen to get something to eat? I will be in the dining room, so come and eat with me and we can discuss what we are going to do about this... unusual situation."

He pulled his head back through the door and shut it with a bang that made me jump.

"Do any other people live here?" I asked Hedgely.

"Most of the time, it's just me and Professor Flip. People who work for the Order of the Phoenix come to stay all the time, though, to help the Professor with his work."

"What is the Order of the Phoenix?"

"It is an organisation that was set up to fight against the dark forces, but these days it fights the Ministry of Magic as well, because it is so corrupt and riddled with evil."

I followed Hedgely through a maze of corridors to the kitchen, whilst pondering how Muggles could remain so blind to the magical problems going on all around them, before remembering that I had been like that just yesterday.

"Here we are!"

I found myself standing next to Hedgely in the strangest kitchen I had ever seen. There was no cooker, no cupboards or sink. There was just what I took to be a fridge-freezer in one corner. The wall paper was loud and garish, clashing horribly with the white tiled floor. I could see Professor Flip's taste reflected in the kitchen's decor.

"How are we supposed to cook food in here?" I queried.

"Simple," replied Hedgely. He strode across the room to the fridge-freezer, covering the distance with just two of his long strides. He opened the fridge door and pulled out a meagre ham sandwich and an apple.

"Your turn," he said, "Hot food is in the bottom, cold food is in the top."

I didn't bother asking how hot food came out of the freezer section or how he'd got a sandwich, plate and all, already made from the fridge. The entire refrigerator must have been enchanted in some way. I moved towards the bottom section, fantasising about a burger and some chips. I yanked the door open... and was disappointed to see nothing. It was empty.

"Hey! Nothing happened!"

"You have to think about what you want from it," said Hedgely, "You have to really want it, to taste it before you've actually eaten it. Try again."

I shrugged and closed the door again. I imagined a burger in my mind, grilled inside a white bread roll, crammed with lettuce, cheese, bacon and mayonnaise accompanied by a bowl of golden chips, sprinkled with salt and drenched in vinegar. I tasted the flavours on my tongue and smelt the aroma of the food. I opened the door again... and there it was. Exactly how I had imagined it, cooked to perfection. I lifted the plate the burger was on with one hand, the bowl of chips with the other and nudged the 'freezer' closed with my knee.

"Wow that was amazing!"

Hedgely smiled wryly.

"I'm not even going to ask how you Muggles get your food. You have to overcomplicate everything!"

I returned his smile, thinking about how Mum had to buy all the ingredients, prepare and cook them before we could eat anything. It was far easier to just think about what you wanted and for it to magically appear, but would she see it like that, or would she think it was as unnatural as the moving pictures?

The kitchen adjoined the dining room, connected by a door that had photographs pinned all over it. I looked closely at a photo of Professor Flip when he was younger, before he got his unicorn tattoo and multiple ear piercings. I was surprised how normal he looked; the only odd thing about his face was his eyebrows that were moving up and down. It appeared that in this world, photographs, like paintings, could move.

The dining room had an appropriate air of elegance that fitted in with the rest of the house. The table was long, and made of polished mahogany. The chairs that lined either side of it were made of the same wood, but were cushioned with red upholstery. Professor Flip sat at the head of the empty table, and waved us to sit down.

"Good to see you!" he said as Hedgely and I took seats on either side of him, despite that he had seen us less than ten minutes ago, "do tuck in!"

I felt slightly bashful about my burger and chips, as Hedgely nibbled his sandwich and Professor Flip speared his salad with a fork. My meal was considerably larger and more fattening than either of theirs, so I told myself to only eat half of it so that I wouldn't look greedy.

"So," said Hedgely, after we had all swallowed our last mouthful and were washing it down with fizzing, golden liquid from a jug sitting in the middle of the table, "what did you have in mind to do now, Professor?"

Professor Flip pulled a pink and blue polka-dot handkerchief out of the sleeve of his custard coloured suit, and loudly blew his noise with it. I had to put my hand over my mouth and fake a coughing fit in an attempt to disguise my laughter.

"Well, I think I need to see Dudley in action, before I can assess how powerful he is and how he will be of use to us."

"What do you mean by that?" I asked him, feeling uneasy.

"I want you to go outside the boundaries of my house and kill one of the invisibilis monstrum!"

"What?" I gasped, "How am I supposed to do that? I don't have magic! I'll get killed!"

The Professor laughed.

"You'll be just fine. Hedgely will be with you. He does that sort of thing every day!"

I leaned around the Professor to look at my roommate.

"You go out and kill monsters?"

Hedgely looked sheepish.

"I do have some use in the war effort, you know," he told me, "I've killed more of them than any other wizard. You won't die on my watch."

I found it difficult to imagine laid-back, easy going Hedgely killing monsters, but if nothing else, I was starting to learn to expect the unexpected.

"What if we got separated before you killed it? What would happen then? How would I defend myself?"

"That's quite simple, dear boy," said Professor Flip, "We will teach you how to fight! We will get you into shape, and before long, you'll be Dudley the Muggle monster slayer!"