Dah tah da! Golden Warrior returns!

Disclaimer: I am not famous, and none of my original work is famous, so quite logically, neither Peter Pan nor Alice in Wonderland is mine. I don't profit off of this more than I profit off of anything else.

Needless to say, Hook didn't stand a chance, regardless of who he fought. He'd only barely been holding his own against Pan, and now that the captive had wounded him a bit past his handicap, he'd be pathetic. But she had a score to settle- Smee's blood just hadn't been satisfying.

Pan, on the other hand, was proving to be as stubborn as she was. So she thought about working with him on this.

Pshh, she'd never get in sync with this rodent without knowing his holey fighting style better. That'd just handicap them both.

So she thought about just giving the fight to Peter.

Hell no.

So, she reached for the back of her hat, messing with the rolled up lumps of hair she could feel beneath it.

Pan glanced at his ally/new rival cursorily. He was scratching the back of his neck in thought, patting at the ratty hat he wore, perhaps trying to decide which one of them would get the fight.

"Just stay out of my way, Scum," Pan said loudly, as he'd found many times if you sounded quite confident that you had the authority to say something, you'd be obeyed. He made an entertaining show of posing with his sword, in several seconds that for once, the Captain took advantage of, charging.

She smirked evenly.

The girl caught his wrist while he was still twirling ridiculously, and pinned him against the nearby wall by slicing her sword through loose sleeve. Her fake spectacles hit the ground from the sudden movement.

Hook was ambivalent to the pirate's betrayal. Proud of his aim, he switched directions quickly, thrusting the sword through the young pirates neck, grinning wickedly.

A slight pause. With what must have been the pirates last strength, he caught the sword that had flipped from Pan's grip in exchange for the one he'd used to pin him. Impressive, he'd admit, but too late. Ignoring Pan's protests at being disarmed, which quickly grew to horror at his ally's predicament, Hook watched the man carefully. He wanted to see the pain. He wanted to see the blonde pirate die, and he wanted to see him in pain as he died.

A few moments passed. No reaction. No pain. No anguish. Hook narrowed his eyes. Was that a smirk? Where was the blood? He jerked on the sword roughly, trying to ascertain the problem (or get a reaction) and still there was no blood. None. He jerked so hard he lost his grip on the sword.

The blonde pirate's hat fell off, and a few strands of a falling cascade of blonde hair proved to be the only fruit of Hook's slice.

Forget shocked. The Captain had never been more disgusted, more aggravated, more humiliated, more murderously angry in his life. It was like she'd sliced off his other hand.

"Bri! What do you think you're..?"

"My name," the girl caught the Captain's flying sword with one hand, brushing her hair out idly with her other. "is Alice. Slayer of the Jaberrwocky and Champion of Wonderland."

Peter busted out laughing. "O-old Man," he gasped, "you're really losing your touch. You're getting your butt kicked by a girl." He continued to laugh uproariously, completely forgetting the blonde was the very reason he was attached to the wall of the boat and helpless.

Alice rolled her eyes, and secured her grip on both swords, pointing one right at Hook's mouth.

"Surrender," she ordered. "Now."

Unarmed, with one arm still bleeding, James wasn't an idiot. He hissed and grimaced, but stood straight and said, "Alright. This is over. I surrend-"

"Beg," she jerked the sword precisely, but it appeared rather careless, and Hook flinched.

"F-fine, p-please, let us go. P-please. We won't- we won't come back," he was furious, but much too scared act on it.

"Alright, then, I'll hold you to that," Alice lowered the sword and took a step back.

Right when Hook's shoulders relaxed- so of course, right before his hand could even twitch towards his gun- Alice was back on him, sending warning slices directly through his leg and his uninjured arm. The Captain cried a word most wouldn't repeat.

"Are you insane?" Suddenly Peter wasn't so amused. "He's unarmed- you can't do that to someone unarmed! That's bad form! He could die from that!"

"Oh, shut up Pan," Alice sighed, leveling one of her swords lazily beneath his chin. He fell silent, though he was automatically pissed to find himself being handled so easily by a girl. A girl that was so weak, that he'd of course have defeated her by now, had he not gotten himself pinned to the wall at some point, by some person he refused to remember.

"Peter! Peter! Wha-" Wendy slowed to a halt a few steps away from the boy, confused and wary. She and Tiger Lily had been two of the last ones to figure out the battle was over, and abandon their positions. Peter was standing there, looking cross. The girl, from description most likely the girl they'd been looking for, was standing beside him, with two blood-stained swords and one relatively clean one.

The Lost Boys, having no one left to fight since the pirates withdrawals, were all standing around idly. The girl didn't look like she was threatening Peter's life, standing there calmly, wearing mens' trousers and a curious look. But the tense atmosphere showed Peter, not being the one holding all three weapons, was most likely not the reason they were all waiting.

"Is this all of them?" she asked.

"I suppose so. I don't count them like chickens or something," Peter looked directly away from the blonde, signaling he was discomforted, so she should feel bad and apologize. Wendy knew, as well as Peter did, that she and Tiger Lily made the group complete.

The Boys watched the new lady with suspicion, but for most, curiosity was outweighing it. Who was she, and why was Peter mad at her?

"Hello everybody," she smiled with so much friendly energy, it melted the group in a moment. A few of the smaller ones forgot about Peter completely and tottered up to her, introducing themselves and asking her name.

"Alice," her smile grew wider, "My, look at how cute you all are!"

There really didn't seem to be anything wrong with her. The boys began to converge on the Alice Lady asking multiple questions. She seemed to be answering the ones she heard, and pretending like she hadn't heard ones she couldn't get to in a reasonable amount of time. Tiger Lily and Wendy exchanged a look, then the Indian Princess shrugged, deciding she was unconcerned, and headed back in the direction of her tribe, to report that if they saw a blonde-haired blue-eyed lady who wasn't Mother Wendy, they still weren't allowed to shoot her. Peter still insisted on looking in the exact opposite direction of Alice.

"Peter, you do realize you're being rude," Wendy tried, benevolently approaching the sulking boy.

The boy spun around so fast she started a bit, and was in her face. Wendy caught sight of Tinker Bell shimmering nearby. Whatever the little bug had whispered in his ear about the new Lady was probably problematic.

"I'm being rude? She took my sword, and battled Hook! Every one knows, Hook's mine. Who does she think she is, just a random girl fighting a pirate? And then injuring him while he was unarmed!" He looked around as if he was about to say something private, before getting closer to Wendy and speaking in a loud whisper- "She has bad form Wendy. That's just like James Hook. There has to be something wrong with her anyway, trying to fight like that and being a girl…"

"Peter, Peter! Calm down!" Wendy tried to pat him to the ground, for she knew the higher he rose, the more pleasant his anger-induced dream theaters would seem to him.

"Hey, Pan! Is there a problem?" At the sound of his name, Peter's eyes snapped to the new girl of their own accord.

"Umm! It's nothing! It's nothing really!" Wendy got a somewhat firm grip on Peter's upper arm, "Peter, apologize to our guest," she whispered as sharply as she could. She blinked, as she realized he was no longer listening to her. His face was still sulky and distracted, but the distraction seemed to have won out a bit.

It was nothing really. Peter was just noticing, for the Alice Lady to have passed for a male pirate, she looked nothing like one. The girl was smiling now, and her eyes had warmed several degrees from when she'd been fighting. Her hair really was a brighter color than Wendy's, and her face was nicely proportioned and all… not that he cared, but it was sort of… surprising…

"Peter!" Wendy scolded. "I said apologize."

"We were hoping the Alice Lady could stay, Peter!" one of the boys sitting near Alice's lap said loudly. "She says she knows some great stories! Maybe she could be like a second mother to us or something!"

"Or an older sister!" one suggested, oblivious.

"Yes, a sister would be great!" another one added.

"Sister Alice! Sister Alice!" the boys started to cheer.

"Peter!" now Wendy didn't want him to apologize- she wanted him to shut them down. Shut them down flat. "Come on, now… I mean, it would be okay but we.. Um we don't really…"

"You say she knows stories?" Peter asked, crossing his arms and taking care to look as cross as possible, oblivious to Wendy's mumbling beside him. Wendy gaped at him, and several little boys yelled "Yes!"

He pursed his lips, seeming to think hard.

"I'm sorry… I don't have anywhere else to go, tonight, but I don't want to be a bur-" Alice tried to say she wasn't going to stay long, but the boys were chanting "please"es all around her, drowning her out.

"Peter!" Wendy was nearly positive that the resounding tinkle she heard near her head was Tink's simultaneous cry.

"Fine. She can stay," Peter said, in a voice that said he hadn't wanted to concede, completely ignoring Wendy and Tinker Bell. There were resounding cheers from overexcited little boys, and Peter worked hard to storm himself to his home, to his leaf bed, leaving no doubt in anyone's minds that he was still extremely furious with their new arrival, because they… well they had to have committed some unknown crime, because… it was obvious.

When he turned towards home, it was the first time he'd looked away from Alice's face since she'd first said his name.

I likey this one! :D Yeah. Well I can't let this author's note take long. Please review! Sorry I'm slow!