Broken Promises Chapter 11, a twilight fanfic

~*BROKEN PROMISES*~

Chapter 11 – Familiarity

BellaPOV

His embrace made me shiver.

Jacob's ice cold arms enclosed around me, inviting me back into something that should have been familiar. I took a deep breath looking for anything that would remind me of Jacob. His scent, though enticing, was nothing like I remembered him to be. I felt entranced by the beautiful creature that stood before me. No, he did not smell like my Jacob, but it was more alluring.

Jacob's arms squeezed tighter around me. I felt like he was holding on to me to keep me from running away. As my head lay on his chest, I noticed not a single breath escaped his lungs. That was the moment I realized being with him wasn't natural.

It wasn't normal.

I loosened his hold over me and took a step back, gazing at the beautiful creature that stood before me. His eyes were the color of citrine with small flecks of red in them. His jaw line was more defined and his high cheekbones followed suit. Jacob's massive, muscular arms looked like those sculpted from Greek statues and I felt as though his features had almost become enhanced from the Jacob I knew. His hair gathered tied back from around his face and I felt myself gaping at him. I wanted so bad to touch him again.

He wasn't my Jacob. He was an advanced version of the man that I loved. I wanted so bad to forgive him for what he did and climb right back into his arms again, but I couldn't push that part of me to the front of my feelings for him. I still hated him for the hell he put me through the past two years. I wanted to make him suffer for the things he did.

As the anger and frustration built up in front of me, I thought of the many nights I sat in my room crying, wondering where he went, how he was fairing and if he even thought of me. I squeezed my hands beside me so tight I knew my nails had pierced my skin.

I closed my eyes, hoping it would make all this pain and confusion go away but the moment I opened them, he still stood in front of me, almost begging me to make a decision.

I hated to feel pressured and my only reaction was to make him understand what he did to me.

It hurt. My hand felt like I slapped a marble table the moment it reached Jacob's face. Not only did he look like a Greek statue, he felt like one too.

I yelped out in agony and pain as I danced in a small circle. I just knew I broke my hand. I also noticed that Jacob seemed to be in agony himself.

I thought vampires felt no pain.

"What the fuck was that for?" Jacob asked as I still tried to shake the pain off my hand.

"How fucking dare you Jacob Black. How dare you come back into my life like this and think that just by hugging me makes the past two years go away. Do you know what you did to me all this time? I loved you so much and you left me. You fucking left me!"

His eyes reacted in the pain I felt. I could have sworn I saw him grimace as my heart felt like it was breaking all over again.

Good. You fucking share in my pain you selfish bastard.

I hated him so much at that moment. As much as I hated him, however, I wanted to be back in his embrace again.

I was so confused.

"Bella, please try to understand why I did what I did. I wanted to be able to protect you from anything. I couldn't bear to lose you and in the end, I lost you anyway. I'm only here asking for your forgiveness. I'm not asking you to take me back, but I really miss you so much."

His eyes were pleading and the intensity of his gaze held me for a moment as my mouth fell open to say something but I couldn't find the words.

A small smile lifted across his face and I had no idea what he was thinking.

"You miss me too, don't you Bella?" Jacob asked me. "You miss me enough to stand here in front of me and not run away. You could have so many times in this conversation, but you haven't yet."

He was right. I didn't have to talk to him. I could walk away and never have to deal with his bullshit or the drama anymore.

Here I stood. I wanted to talk to him about the things that I felt and the memories of us that I held onto.

I hated that he was right. I loved that he was right.

I loved him.

Period.

End of discussion.

I felt my heart mending at the mere sight of the smile that spread across his beautiful face. He was the reason I held onto so much hope that I could wholeheartedly love someone again.

He hurt me. Yes, that was the biggest issue in all this. He went against the one thing I was so adamant about. I wanted him human, to be with me until our natural eternity came to an end.

How could I hate him so much when it didn't matter? He was still here for me. He still wanted to love me, and be with me, a mere human who couldn't do the things he could.

He didn't care.

He wanted me.

I took a step forward, watching his gaze and I wanted him to touch me again.

It was as though he could read my mind and he held his hands out to me.

I grabbed both hands in unison as the coldness ran up my arms.

"Jacob," I said as I squeezed his hands.

"Yes, Bella."

"Don't you ever fucking leave me again, do you understand me. I don't care if I have to follow you to the end of my days, don't ever leave me again."

An even bigger smile played across his face.

I knew I was forgiving him so easily. I knew that I was eventually paying a higher price later.

What was the going rate for eternal love these days?

Oh yeah, that's right. One soul.

That was ok with me though. Jacob already had every single part of me.

My heart.

My body.

He also had my soul. How could I lose something I didn't have in the first place?

I pulled Jacob's arms around me, letting him love me again.

As I glanced up to him, his golden eyes lit up.

"Bella, I swear to you, I won't let anything happen to you. I will always be here for you. I'm never leaving your side again."

JacobPOV

I felt it as her mood shifted.

At first she was happy. She was glad to be back with me and I could tell it by the elation that radiated from her as I held her in my arms.

The moment she left my embrace, I knew I was in a world of trouble.

She transitioned from elation to hatred in mere seconds.

I was waiting for the fall out and the moment her hand hit my face, I knew this wasn't going to end well.

She danced around in pain and as much as I wanted to laugh at her for being so stupid to hit a vampire, I couldn't do it. My hand felt like it was broken and I tried as much as I could to hide the pain I felt from her.

"What the fuck was that for?" I yelled at her.

Then her gaze hit mine again and I felt my very own heart breaking. I hated that she could do this to me. I wanted to make her feel better and I knew that the only way to do so was to be patient, let this unfold the way it needed to.

She finally said the words that I knew were coming.

How could I explain to her the reasons behind betraying her? She never understood beforehand. Her way of dealing with it was to leave me to my own loneliness… and hers too.

I finally found the words I wanted to say to her since the day I saw her with James at the café. I had to tell her how I felt and that I needed her with me. I didn't want to pressure her though. She needed space to figure this out.

I wanted to reach to her, wanted her back in my arms again. She felt so right molded into my embrace and if she forgave me, I'd never let her go again. I needed her in my life regardless of the pain we put each other through.

The thought occurred to me that she had not left yet. She had plenty of opportunity to move from me but she stood before me as though she needed to do this too. Her eyes were pleading for relief, forgiveness, wanting and most of all she needed to know I wouldn't leave her again.

"You miss me too, don't you Bella?" Jacob asked me. "You miss me enough to stand her in front of me and not run away. You could have so many times in this conversation, but you haven't yet."

She stood with her mouth gaping wide open. She knew I was right. She wanted so bad to say that I was wrong but she couldn't. I knew her better than she knew herself and I wanted her to understand that I felt it too.

She finally said the words I'd been dying to hear all these years.

She wanted to be with me too.

She needed me too.

If I had a heart, it would have fluttered and swelled with so much love at that one moment.

"Bella, I swear to you, I won't let anything happen to you. I will always be here for you. I'm never leaving your side again."

My arms embraced her tight again and I felt her shutter again. I hoped that it wasn't for the cold.

"Jacob, how did you find me?"

"Edward. He saw you standing out here on the cliffs. He was watching you for me to make sure you were ok."

She laughed. God how I missed that so much.

"So you've been stalking me huh?"

"Not exactly. I didn't even know you were in Seattle until the other day. I saw you at a café with someone."

She fell silent for a moment and then backed away from my embrace again.

"James, he's gone missing and I don't know what to do about it."

I couldn't tell her. I needed to but I had her back in my arms and I couldn't let that go. I needed to tell her.

"Bella, we need to talk about something."

"Not now Jacob."

She put her arms back around me and held me tight to her. I followed her lead and just held her. I could wait to tell her. I just hoped she didn't hate me. I didn't do anything wrong. Edward couldn't keep his thirst to himself.

I pulled her into my lap as I sat down on a broken tree next to us.

Her face nuzzled into my neck. I all the sudden realized that I didn't crave her blood like I did with most humans. She smelled awesome but I didn't want to kill her.

Instead I wanted her in another way.

She pulled away and gazed back into my eyes. Hers were warm and I felt my coldness melt away just by looking into them.

I leaned into her, taking her bottom lip into mine and being ever so careful to not lose control. She wrapped her small arms around my neck pushing my head into hers and all the pain and hurt that I had caused her seemed to slip away again.

Her hands slipped down my shoulders and straight to ends of my shirt. Her warm hands pushed underneath the black T-shirt I wore and I felt her warm fingertips grazing the outlines of my muscles at my sides.

This time I was the one to shutter. It had been such a long time since I felt her touch me like she wanted me. I pulled her body closer to mine. She halfway stood in front of me then slowly eased her body back down on me, straddling me as she sat.

Her hands then pushed my shirt up even further and I took the hint that she wanted it off. I obliged and helped her. Her eyes seemed to light up and I felt like she was gawking at me.

I actually liked that.

Her lips met the skin on my neck with such a fierce needing I couldn't help but gasp at how awesome it felt. Her lips and tongue traced ever inch from my jaw line back down to my shoulders.

Her shirt needed to be off as soon as possible. She helped as I removed her shirt and my lips softly grazed every inch of her neck. I couldn't believe that I held so much restraint with her but I just wanted her back in my life. I could only focus on her being in my lap, shirtless, and wanting me the way I wanted her.

She whispered into my ears, "Is it possible for us to even be doing this – don't you want to kill me?"

I felt a giggle leave my lips as I whispered back, "I definitely don't want to kill you. However, I want to be inside of you so bad, it might kill me if I don't get there soon."

She giggled back at me. "Well, how can you die again? Isn't that against nature or something?" She laughed as she kissed my shoulder.

"I might just die, again, from sheer desire."

Suddenly, a noise came from the brush where I appeared. I slipped my shirt around Bella as Edward came from the clearing.

"Jacob, I'm really sorry to interrupt, but we have a situation back at the house," Edward said as he stepped out of the path.

Fuck.

"Edward, can't this wait?" I said through my teeth, frustrated as hell that he could cock block me like that.

"Actually, no. He's done."

"Who's done?" Bella asked me.

"No one," I said back to her.

"Jacob, don't you think you need to say something to her?"

"What? What do you need to tell me?" Bella asked, looking confused as hell.

She stood up to face both me and Edward head on – with my black T-shirt still covering her halfway.

BellaPOV

Something wasn't right. Jacob was being secretive. Edward claimed he was hiding something from me.

It didn't make any sense whatsoever.

"Who's done? What the hell Jacob. Tell me," I begged.

Edward's face looked distraught but it didn't hold a candle to Jacob's face expression.

He looked… scared.

"Bella, it's about James," Jacob finally said.

In the dead silence, all the details suddenly fell into place for me with a burst of intuition. Something Edward didn't want me to know. Something Jacob wouldn't have kept from me… It was never going to end, was it?

I felt myself get dizzy and before I realized what was happening, cold arms slipped under me as I fell to the ground.