Us, Servants to the Moon – Chapter 4
Author's Note: I'm in such a good writing mood these days! So here's the fourth chapter, the resolution to last chapter's cliffhanger. Hope you enjoy it!
Jeremy Gilbert came back to life with a choking gasp, like a drowning person who managed to reach the surface just in time. The ring had torn him back into the world of the living once again, and honestly, this time against his expectations.
It took him a while until the dizziness had left his head and his sight became clear again. The first thing he felt was moistness at the back of his head. With a cough, he managed to sit up, suddenly realizing that he was still breathing hard. The room around him was empty and silent, the windows still wide open, an icy chill playing with the curtains.
"Tyler?" Jeremy whispered into the silence, but of course, there was no reply. For a second, Jeremy started to wonder if their little plan had worked out, if Tyler was a werewolf right now, but then he realized that Tyler had to be, otherwise Jeremy would have stayed dead in the first place.
Eventually, Jeremy felt himself calming down, his breath becoming quieter and more balanced with every passing minute. Slowly he lifted his hand to his forehead, touching the spot where Tyler had placed the gun and shot him. There was no injury. On the bed, however – he realized as he turned around – there was a rather wide pool of blood, liquid, that had been collected by the plastic wrap. Instinctively, Jeremy touched the back of his head, noticing that his hair and the collar of his pullover were soaked with blood as well.
The alarm clock on the bedside table was displaying 7:22 in bright red letters. He had been out cold for roughly four minutes. Still a quarter left until sunrise.
Clumsily he slid off the bed and started removing the plastic wrap together with the blood. He was relieved as soon as he had made sure the mattress as well as the sheets were clean and had not taken any damage. Quickly, he went downstairs to throw the plastic wrap away and then back into the bathroom to clean his pullover and wash his hair. When he felt the cool water running along his head, he started wondering where Tyler was right now for the first time. Was he alright? Had he left through the window? What had he felt transforming into a wolf? And what did it feel like being one?
After a few minutes he went back to his room and looked out of the window. The morning had already started dawning and even though the sun had not risen yet, the blackness of the night was gone. Jeremy listened to the morning silence for a moment and shook his head when he realized that he was inwardly hoping to hear a wolf's howl in the distance. No, his part in this little play was over now, he had to admit with regret. From now on, Tyler would be the protagonist, the one to experience all the adventures, while Jeremy would be forced to sit at home and be bored. He wasn't of need to Tyler anymore, now that Tyler had what he wanted. So, starting today, he would have to focus on the vampires to finally be involved in some action.
Three minutes until sunrise.
Jeremy turned around and slid under the blanket of his bed. There was nothing he could do anymore, so he might just as well get some sleep.
A heavy, hollow sound nearby made Jeremy tear his eyes open again in horror several moments later. He stopped breathing for a second as he stared at a huge dark creature that was standing just in front of the window. He sat up, eyes sill wide open, until he realized that it was a dark brown wolf – it was Tyler.
Jeremy breathed out slowly. The huge, dangerous looking animal so close to him scared him, and still, he tried to convince himself that he had already spent the entire night playing videogames with that same being, no matter how different he might look right now.
"Tyler?" Jeremy said quietly, warily, because he wasn't sure to what extent Tyler was aware of himself and to what extent he was just a bloodthirsty animal.
The wolf looked back at him for a while, then, seconds later, he came towards Jeremy, jumping onto the bed with graceful easiness.
Jeremy winced at the animal's sudden movement, but forced himself to stay calm, even as the wolf's weight pushed the mattress on its side down.
Jeremy swallowed, but as the wolf did nothing more except sit there and look at him, he started to become more confident. Besides, if Tyler was not aware of himself, then why would a random animal break into to Jeremy's room on this very morning?
Slowly and very carefully, Jeremy reached out his hand towards the wolf. He was trembling with fear but still, somehow he felt excited. The wolf didn't move as Jeremy's hand touched it, carefully stroking the soft bushy fur. "Wow…" Jeremy was overwhelmed. "It worked… It really worked…" He let his hand run along the wolf's back and along its side, the structure of its fur so real against Jeremy's hand. "This is amazing…"
The wolf blinked and unexpectedly, the animal jumped towards him, pushing Jeremy down like an overexcited dog, happy to see its master.
Jeremy started laughing as he fell back against the cushion, "you're happy, too, huh," he teased, "that it worked? Who would have thought it actually would."
He looked up again and his laugh stuck in his throat.
Golden sunbeams fell over the horizon, streaming into Jeremy's room, blinding him for a second, but Jeremy had already noticed that the creature above him was not a wolf anymore, but a real human being. He was looking right into Tyler Lockwood's eyes, his dark, deep eyes with the narrow eyebrows, that always made him look slightly grim. Jeremy realized that it was the part he liked most about Tyler's face, the part that made him look special and also beautiful in a strange, noble way.
The sunrise had turned the wolf back into a boy, who was now lying there, naked and trembling.
There was a wolfish glow in Tyler's eyes and Jeremy knew that he hadn't regained his full consciousness yet. It made him look alien, dangerous and wild. Jeremy couldn't help it. He lifted his hand to touch Tyler's bare back. His skin felt warm, almost hot and at the same time soft and… so very much alive, moving slightly with every breath he took.
Tyler's unsteady breath was stroking over Jeremy's face irregularly. He was looking down at him with those yellow glowing eyes, and no matter how hard Jeremy tried, he wasn't able to read him. The skin underneath his hand moved again, making his palm prickle in an unfamiliar way.
Jeremy felt his mind drifting away for a second. Whatever it meant, he wanted this. Now. Gay, straight or bi, friend, rival or lover, these were all just words to him right now, words, that failed to describe what he was feeling at this very moment.
So he put all rationality aside and supported himself with his elbows just enough to lift his shoulders, until he reached Tyler's lips with his own.
It was a gentle kiss, slow, sweet and savoring, their lips almost not touching at all, as if they feared it would be a sensation too precious to actually enjoy.
Jeremy closed his eyes. He had fought this so hard.
Unexpectedly, Tyler intensified the kiss, pushing Jeremy back onto the mattress. There was a desperate longing in his kiss now, a wolfish hunger, that seemed to have been buried away forever and was now being unleashed for the first time.
The harshness scared Jeremy a bit at first, although, just an instant later, he felt himself being carried away by the moment. He tried to suppress a smirk as he grabbed Tyler's hair and kissed him back with all he had. For a second he opened his eyes again, blinking against the sunrise, and somehow he got the impression that the golden sunlight made the room around them shine.
Hours later, Jeremy slowly opened his eyes. The midday sun was filling the room with dull, gray light. The contours of their surroundings were now as clear as his mind had become again. The numbness was gone, so was all the magic, all the passion.
Instead, a fresh cool air was filling the room because the window was still open and Jeremy knew that Tyler Lockwood was lying next to him.
For a second, the memory of all that had happened started to choke him. He had slept with another guy, and not just some random faceless guy he would never have to see again in his life. It was Tyler Lockwood, a person with a name, a history, a family, a home. He was a friend. A foe. The guy who had slept with Vicky Donovan. The one who had treated her so badly. The one who had almost twice broken Jeremy's nose. That weird, self-absorbed and arrogant dick…
Jeremy breathed out slowly and anger almost managed to put tears into his eyes. He felt sick just thinking of the things they had done this morning, memories that can't ever be taken back. He would have to live with them all his life.
Slowly, carefully, he turned his head, praying that he would be alone, but no, there he was. Tyler. An oppressive feeling started weighing on his mind and still, as soon as his eyes touched the other boy, that warm, caring feeling returned and his heart beat faster for a short moment. He could feel the inner conflict, and it seemed to tear him apart.
The same moment, however, Jeremy realized that Tyler was just as awake as he was himself.
The other boy turned his head towards him and for the first time since, they looked each other in the eyes. "Hey," Tyler whispered quietly, an unreadable look on his face.
"Hey," Jeremy replied warily.
"Are you feeling embarrassed?" Tyler asked.
"Well," Jeremy pursed his lips, surprised by this question, "it's kinda hard not to be."
"Tell me about it." Tyler snorted, then he rolled on his back, staring at the ceiling. "This is kind of an awkward situation right now."
"Tell me about it," Jeremy replied, forcing himself to look away.
They stayed like this for a few moments. No one knew what to say.
Eventually Tyler sighed. "So I guess you were right after all. About the gay stuff."
"Bisexual," Jeremy corrected slowly, almost to himself, as if this was able to change their situation.
"You're not helping." Tyler shook his head. "It's so weird, I mean I transformed into a wolf last night, a real supernatural being, and still, all I can think about is… this. As if the wolf thing was just some random, every day event. It was what this whole crap was supposed to be about… And not about… I pictured this entire thing kind of differently."
"You're not the only one, there."
They were lying on their backs next to each other, staring at the ceiling and trying to realize what had just happened. It was the most embarrassing moment in their lives for both of them. They were both naked, trying to hide from each other underneath the blanket and still, it wasn't only the physical vulnerability that made them suffer.
"If anyone finds out about this…" Tyler said after a while, covering his eyes with his arm. "My mother, my friends… the entire town… I don't even wanna think about it. They'll point at me behind my back and say, 'look at the mayor's son…he's the one, who…'"
"Or if Elena or Jenna knew," Jeremy replied. "They would never treat me the same again… If they ever find out about this…" He closed his eyes for a minute, then he shook his head as if to get rid of a terrible nightmare. "Doesn't matter if we want it or not," he turned his head to Tyler, "we're in this mess together. We need to be able to trust each other."
"Yeah, well, I certainly am the last person to gossip about this." Tyler looked at Jeremy for a moment with that troubled yet at the same time almost cunning expression in his eyes, that Jeremy couldn't help feeling drawn to him again.
"So we're keeping this a secret?" Tyler asked to reassure himself. "I mean, we're both holding something over the other's head, so…"
"Yeah, well, if you keep your mouth shut, then I will do so too."
"Okay."
"Good. Well now I suggest we finally get out of this damn bed. It's driving me crazy." Jeremy grabbed the blanket, sliding towards the edge, until he stopped and turned his head towards Tyler. "Uhm…"
"Yeah, I get it," Tyler replied, pulling the blanket over his head. "Believe me, I'm definitely not keen on seeing anything ever again."
Hearing that, Jeremy felt a faint grin curving his lips. Their situation was such a mess, and still… there was something endearing about the way Tyler had said that, and honestly, Jeremy couldn't agree more.
"Okay," Jeremy said as soon as he was dressed, "I'll just be in the kitchen, get us something to eat, and as soon as you're ready-"
"Jeremy, wait."
"What?"
"I can't get up."
"Meaning?"
Tyler looked around the room sheepishly. "Did you see that wolf wearing any pants?"
"Oh…" Jeremy rolled his eyes. "Where are your clothes?"
"No idea," Tyler replied. "Must have lost them somewhere in the woods."
"Great." Jeremy sighed rolling his eyes. "Okay, wait…" He opened the wardrobe and pulled out a pair of jeans and a pullover, tossing them at Tyler. "Well, here you go. You can have some of my stuff. Hope they'll fit."
"Thanks," Tyler replied and somehow his expression was suddenly so serious, that Jeremy stopped for a second before leaving the room.
"Thanks? For what?"
Tyler closed his eyes and the words seemed to hurt him. "For not laughing at me."
Jeremy looked back at him, hanging his head. "Hey… I embarrassed myself just as much and you're not laughing at me either. So, I guess, thank you, too." He tried to smile at Tyler before he left the room.
Elena Gilbert turned the key and opened the door. She had a heavy bag in her hand, tossing the keys on the dresser almost carelessly. "Jeremy, we're back," he yelled, as she walked into the hallway.
Her brother stuck his head out of the kitchen and there was something in his expression that looked as if it was panic. "Elena…?"
"What did you say?" a voice came down from the bathroom upstairs. "I didn't hear you." A person came down the stairs.
Elena's eyes opened wide as she stared up. "…Tyler?"
Tyler stopped as soon as he saw her. "Elena…"
"Hey," Elena replied, still confused, looking at her brother for help.
Jeremy rushed out of the kitchen. "What are you doing here?" he cried almost helplessly.
"Yeah well, what is he doing here?" she hissed back. "And why is he wearing your stuff?"
Jeremy struggled to reply just anything, but his head was nothing but empty. Cold sweat started to run down his back. Why? Why was she back? She wasn't supposed to return until Monday!
"I…" Tyler looked at Jeremy, uncomfortable, then back at Elena. "I better get going now," he said, turning his head away from her as he left through the door.
"Elena, are you crazy?" Jeremy tore his hair after Tyler had shut the door. "What the hell are you doing here? Today!"
"What was that about?" Elena shook her head. "Tyler? Tyler Lockwood? Seriously, I would have expected anyone. And that was your pullover!" She pointed after him.
"We had pizza okay? And he dropped it and he was covered with tomato sauce. You're making such a big fuss over this."
"Oh, sorry, I just returned to my house to find Tyler Lockwood walking out of my bathroom."
"Hey guys!" It was Jenna, who entered, struggling with a bag even larger than Elena's. "Wasn't that just Mayor Lockwood's son who stumped past me?"
"Wearing Jeremy's clothes," Elena added. "Yes, that was him."
Jeremy held his breath, furious. He couldn't believe it! Why were they back? Why did they run into Tyler? How was he going to explain what he couldn't understand himself?
"Wow…" Jenna seemed impressed. "Wasn't he something like your arch nemesis, Jeremy?"
"I invited some guys from school over last night and he just happened to be come along, okay?" Jeremy snapped back, struggling to keep his composure. "If you had returned tomorrow as planned, you wouldn't have noticed anything."
"Well, sorry to disappoint you," Jenna said with a grin. "You have been caught red-handed. Now come on, help us with the bags."
Jeremy let out a sigh. You have no idea.
About half an hour later, Jeremy returned to his room. Eventually, he managed to calm down, even if it was just a bit. His aunt and his sister had fortunately stopped bugging him about Tyler or anything that had happened since they had left, and Jeremy was glad about it.
He grabbed the headphones and put some music on, before letting himself drop on the bed. Did Jenna and Elena suspect anything? He couldn't tell. He feared they did, but then again, maybe that was just the normal reaction to suddenly running into Tyler Lockwood, who had never been to their house before and – to be fair – wasn't exactly known for being Jeremy's best friend. Maybe that would have startled anyone? And still, there was this thing about the clothes… Jeremy turned the volume up.
For a moment he was able to clear his head, until suddenly the memory of this morning returned and overwhelmed him like a giant wave. They had been right here, right on this bed, together. Now that Tyler wasn't around, Jeremy didn't have to pretend anymore. He had liked it, he finally accepted. He had enjoyed being with Tyler Lockwood, even though this feeling of hostility towards the other boy wasn't entirely gone either. Maybe he had enjoyed it even because of that.
His thoughts wandered on to Vicky Donovan. Even though she wasn't alive anymore, she still seemed to be the invisible link between them, connecting them and keeping them apart at the same time. He wondered if Tyler had been the same sleeping with Vicky as he had been sleeping with him. He wondered how much of her Tyler saw in him. How much of a replacement for her he was to him. The question started bugging him how things between Tyler and Vicky really had been like… Had he been more gentle towards her than towards him? Had he been more eager when he'd slept with her? Had he… enjoyed being with Vicky more than being with him…? Instantly he shook his head. That was probably the reason why triangles usually only played out in two directions, not actually all three possible ways.
"Jeremy?" Elena knocked at the door. "We're having lunch, do you want some, too?"
What about Tyler? Was he brooding over the very same things right now? How did he actually feel about this? Was he confused? Was he suffering? Was he happy? And how did he really feel about Jeremy?
There were so many questions left unanswered and Jeremy knew that – more than anything – he wanted to talk to Tyler, to ask him, to make sure…
He took a glance at his cell phone lying on the night table and it made him realize that he didn't even know Tyler's number.
To be continued…