QUACK EXPERIMENTAL FANFICTION PRESENTS:

BUCKET O' PARODIES

Ed vs. The Furby

Ok, this is based off of a prank call thing I saw on youtube. This chapter is leaning towards the rated M side because of a whole lot of swearing. But it's funny. This chapter is all about Ed calling the toy department because of a defective furby. WOOT. Oh and would it kill you to take 1 minute out of your life to review? I even allow anonymous reviews. The more reviews I get, the faster I update. OK! On to the story!

DISCLAIMER: I don't own FMA. I used to own a furby but then I locked it in a dark closet in our attic and lost the key years ago.

Edward

Toy department people

Furby

This is Central Toy Store thank you for calling. How may I help you?

OH! Thank god you've answered! Let me speak to the toy department!

Ok. Please hold.

YES! I've got an emergency!

This is Deborah, how may I help you?

Oh! Thank god you've answered! Is this the toy department?

Yes it is.

I have an emergency! I'm calling about furby!

I'm sorry, I don't have any.

No, I'm not calling because I need the furby, I'm calling because I have a defective furby that's spitting all kinds of violent words at me!

Yes m'am?

I'm a sir.

Yes, sir?

My name is Edward; I bought little furby for my little brother, Alphonse. I promised I'd buy him one because he couldn't have cat!

Yes m-yes sir?

Listen to this Furby! I'm gonna put the furby next to the phone right now! It's making all kinds of demonic noises, and it's making all kinds of cussing and gestures at me!

Listen here, you little brat! I'll kill you! Hehehe!

Did you hear that?!

Yes sir..

It said it was gonna kill me! Did you hear that? Here, listen it's talking again!

Ohhhhh. Beep me!

Now it's using profanity! Did you hear that?

Yes sir.

Where is this coming from? I think we're looking at a lawsuit here!

Where are you calling from sir?

I'm from my house right now!

I'm going to kill your mommy with an axe! Hehe!

Did you this hear that?!

Yes sir. Can you hold on a minute please?

It said it was going to kill my mommy with an axe! What kind of crap are you people selling over there?!

Where are you from, sir?

Hang on, it's talking again!

Shut the hell up! Jackass!

Listen to that how can-

I smoke crack! Ohooooo!

It just said it smokes crack!!

Sir, can I let you talk to my manager please?

Little furby here is promoting drug use! Yes, put your manager on the phone immediately because I'm calling a lawyer next!

Ok, hold on please.

Yes!

Hello, how may I help you please?

Yes, is this the manager?

Yes it is, how can I help you?

Is this a decision making manager or a patsy for the higher-ups?

Sir, how can I help you? I'll try my best.

I have a defective furby that I purchased from you guys! It's spitting out all kinds of vulgar and demonic phrases, and I'm about to call a lawyer to sue your ass off!

What did you say the furby is doing? And where did you buy it?

I bought it from your store! Here's a-

Alskdjvnsfoie;aker cvmfkjehbac vn,js;vme;sdggbbgf(hey, it was making a whole bunch of noises that I couldn't spell so I just put down random letters.)

Now it's making the exorcist noises! Hang on!

Skdgfvvksiealsvfiupaidjfcrighaihvbo

Hang on, lemme, lemme shake it a little bit and see if I can get it to talk!

You're a little whore! Hehehe!

Did you hear that?!

Sir, are you sure that's the furby doll?

Yes I am! It just called me a whore!!!! Did you hear that?!

I…I..um

Listen!

You smell like a camel's ass! Ohhhhh.

Now it's calling me a camel's ass! What are you people selling there?!

Well, as far as I know, we sell gifts for-

I'm gonna turn that into Floodstown Mart when I get through with you! This thing is starting to scare the hell out of me!

DIE! DIE! DIE! HEHEHE!

What did you-

I will spit acid in your eyes and blind you! HEHEHE!

Oh my god!

It just threatened to spit acid in my eyes and blind me!

I heard!

I think, should I call the police!?

I…I don't know what to do!

WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO?! YOU'RE THE MANAGER!!! I think I'm gonna call the bomb disposal unit and have them take this damn thing away!!

Ohhhh! I'm going to give you gonorrhea!

Now it's threatening me with sexually transmitted diseases!!!!!

I've never heard a furby doll say any of those things!

Oh right! What the hell is going on! Is this some kind of a joke?!

No! I..uh

If this is your idea of a joke, I'm going to sue your ass off personally, too! You're gonna be living in the street pushing a shopping cart in about 3 weeks!

Sir, Uh, listen!

I have a gun! I'm going to shoot you now! Hehehehehehehe!

Now it's threatening to shoot me with a gun!

Sir, I hear these things, but I-

It's got a gun! It's got a gun!

HEHEHEHEHE!

Uh..

IT'S GOT A GUN!

NYA NYAGHHHHH AHHHHHH GAHHHHHHHH!

( A/N:oh yeah, pretend there are a loud series of booms going on right now…)

AHHHH YAHHHHH!!!

HEHEHEHEHE!

OH! GAH! YAHHHHH!

HEHEHEHEHE!

Sir? Sir? Oh my god, I.. it, oh I

dial tone

End.

Yeah, I know. What the hell. You can view this if you go to youtube and type in exactly as you see it here: ed vs evil furby roy mustang

Please leave a review. PLEASE! Special thanks to the people who were very kind to take time out of their lives to review. Happy Friday! Oh and because I broke a promise with P.McTully, you have to start calling me Mr.SirManManBob.

Sorry, Peggy.

All titles and slogans are copyright 2007 of AnimeAddict3333 and may not be used without her permission. All of her story ideas may not be reproduced in any way without permission. Quack Experimental FanFiction belongs solely to AnimeAddict333 and the producers of Excel Saga. no one else can use this title.All rights reserved.