I feel a sharp smack to the back of my head as I land in this now familiar white landscape.

"You forgot his birthday, you dick." Zack's voice had now become ever so familiar.

"No I fuckin' didn't. It's in…two days." I rub the spot on my head, scowling.

"It was today, you goddamn prick!" The tall, intimidating man growls, arms crossed over his chest. I scrunch my eyebrows, thinking hard. No, I was sure it was two days. Absolutely sure. Not that I'm usually any good with that sort of thing…but yeah, I was sure. Two days from now.

It was now that Zack was kind enough to bring us from the endless whiteness into a more familiar setting—a nameless bar. Guess the dead like to keep their guests comfortable…or something like that.

The seemingly-alive Soldier orders us a few drinks, and sits next to me at the bar. A calendar appears from nowhere, landing gracefully in Zack's hand. He points to a circled date, with "Cloud's Birthday" written in a slightly legible scrawl. I wince slightly after reading closer. Yup, it was today.

"Fuck." I mutter, rubbing my temple. Zack sighs softly, placing the calendar on the bar.

"S'probably why he didn't want to have sex with you tonight," He murmurs, sipping his drink, a slight smirk playing at the corners of his lips. I scowl, taking a gulp of the stuff placed in front of me. "I never forgot his birthday, you know…" Zack says, smirking full out, casually taunting me. I growl softly, teeth clenching.

"Fuck you, Zack." I mumble, taking another big gulp. Zack smiles kindly, putting a hand on my back.

"Don't worry about it, Reno. I know just the present you should give him. Just make it seem like you planned it the whole time, you know?" He whips out flowers, a box of chocolate and a wrapped box. I arch an eyebrow. He smiles, "C'mon, Reno. I'm just trying to be helpful here!"

Now, honestly, I have reason to not trust Zack. He likes to mess with me. It's probably just because it's a fun way to get back at Cloud's new boyfriend and amuse himself while in the Lifestream. But at this point, if I totally forget Cloud's birthday, he's gonna be bitchy for…at least a week or two. So I'm willing to take the guy's goddamn gifts and get the hell out of here. I nod slowly, and then smirk outright.

"Take me home, you crazy bastard." Zack grins and gives a little half wave. I suddenly find myself back in bed, the presents in my hand. I arch an eyebrow. This Lifestream travel shit is creepy as hell, I swear. I shake off the feeling and turn, shaking Cloud's shoulder gently with my free hand. He grumbles, and then opens an eye halfway. I smile broadly.

"Happy Birthday, Cloudy-kins…" I push the flowers and chocolates toward him. He sits up, surprised yet still slightly groggy.

"Thought you forgot…" He mumbles, smiling softly, rubbing at his eyes. I shake my head.

"Nah, I wouldn't do that! Just wanted to surprise you, ya know?" He nods slowly, looking at the package in my hands. He then tries desperately to arch an eyebrow as a silent question. I smirk, pushing it into his hands with a hopeful look in my eyes.

Cloud reaches into the hastily opened package and out comes—a dog collar? I try desperately to keep a calm look on my face, knowing that this can't be going where I think its going. Cloud quickly unpacks the box: handcuffs, a whip, leather thong, whipped cream, a leather teddy, a cock ring, and a harness. Cloud's brows furrow tightly, looking a mix of angry and amused, but sadly not much of the latter. He plops the empty box down on the floor and looks at the spread.

"Uh…" He starts, scratching his neck. "You care to explain this, Reno?" He looks at me, lips set in a thin line. I wince slightly.

"Well, you see, I just wanted to…erm…make the evening interesting?" I mentally smack myself for that line, and for trusting that traitor. Cloud's expression darkens, and I'm waiting for an ass kicking.

What I got was a blonde, highly energetic blonde pouncing on me. My eyes fly open, and all I see are deep blue orbs. I squeak out a noise of confusion. Cloud holds up a set the handcuffs, swiftly attaching one of my arms to the bedpost before I could protest.

"You said you wanted an interesting evening, right?"

A/n: Yay for sexually driven comedy! And yay for Zacky-poo! XD

Oddly, last chapter waspretty popular, but had very few reviews! I hope I get some feedback on this one. Oh, yeah, and some plotbunnies, if you have them:P

So with the five minutes I have of interent connection I have for who knows how long, I post this mo-fo and check for urgent e-mails. So whoot, I'm going on vacation. Be back in a week, and hopefully with some Musings! X3