Standard Disclaimer: The characters ain't mine, I'm just borrowing their strings for a while, so don't sue me please! Please point out any errors in grammar or spelling privately and I will correct them.
Chapter 6 – Red Bra Reassurances
5 Months Later
Picking up her phone, Regina called Granny's Diner for the fifth time in the past ten minutes only to receive yet another busy signal. It was 1 pm on a Wednesday, which was the time of day she dedicated to calling Ruby, her lover of going on 5 months now. Usually she got through within her first couple of tries even though there was still a bit of a lunch rush going on, so in all likelihood the Diner was extremely busy with both in-house customers and call-in orders for her calls to go so long unanswered.
To tell the truth, Regina was beginning to get annoyed. Aside from her main reason for calling, she needed to hear Ruby's voice if only for a few sparse minutes. Enduring such a long morning of seemingly endless meetings filled to the brim with the tedious droning of insipid politicians made for a broody Mayor, but just talking to Ruby would be enough to brighten her day, no matter how long the conversation lasted.
There was something indescribable about the quality of Ruby's voice, something that calmed Regina as though it was an audible transmission of soothing peace, assuaging the angry temper that always lurked just beneath the surface of her mind. Ruby was a balm more potent than a thousand hours spent watching Snow wallow in misery had ever proven to be, and all it took was one laugh or one affectionate endearment from her to make Regina's troubles flee away, to afford her a precious moment of serenity in an otherwise hectic day.
It was such a simple thing to talk to someone, but when that someone was an integral part of life for a person, hearing their voice not only connected with the auditory portions of the brain but with that mysterious part of a human being that touched everything at once: the physical, the mental, the emotional, and even the spiritual. That was what the sound of Ruby's voice did for Regina. No one besides Henry had ever produced such an effect on her so as to overshadow her vendetta, which was more than a little disconcerting considering how much time and energy she had devoted to it.
Mostly these days, Regina hardly ever thought of Snow anymore. She hadn't really been aware of it, either. It snuck up on her all at once when one day, she woke up and realized she had gone an entire day without caring what Snow was doing, without needing to know that she was suffering and that her happiness was still as far away as it was the day before. Those concerns had suddenly become petty and unimportant when at long last she was getting everything she had ever wanted, for not only was her son was growing close to her again, but Ruby was around more and more often to shine her uniquely bright light into those dark and foreboding corners of Regina's psyche. There was really no room for revenge to exist in her life anymore. Happiness was pushing it out one day at a time, relegating it to the background and filling the subsequent void with a contentment that surpassed her greatest expectations.
That this had happened at all was an affirmation of her risky decision to set her pride aside that day in the diner 5 months ago. That day, her fear of losing Red to Emma Swan had necessitated that she act hastily, but what if she hadn't made that decision? Would she be so happy in the present? The answer to Regina was clear: no. Instead, in all likelihood she would be miserable because Ruby would be with Emma right now and Henry would feel as far away from her as ever before. Sometimes taking risks wound up biting a person in the ass, but sometimes...every now and then, putting everything on the line to take a chance that equally fills the heart with hope and fear can lead to a life of wonder. That was the life Regina was living at present.
It was hard sometimes to reconcile the fact that five whole months had passed since her incredibly memorable first date with Ruby. During the previous years under the Curse, Regina had spent much of her time feeling like she was mired in a river of molasses and unable to make any noticeable progress, or as if she were floating on slow-moving waves through an endless ocean, adrift on the currents though barely aware of their presence beneath her: moving but so slowly as to barely be aware it. The Dark Curse, it turned out, was ironical in the sense that it provided satisfaction to her through proving her a front row seat to her the suffering of her enemies, but just as it gave, it took, and without having even noticed, she had been caught in its web just the same as everyone else. The only difference was that her suffering took the forms of loneliness, regret, boredom, and an impending malaise that threatened to sap her willpower at every turn.
With the passage of days and weeks seeming so interminable, Regina had to resort to desperate measures to keep herself occupied, such as by learning skills she'd always neglected or by picking up hobbies that outside of the Curse would have seemed frivolous. With so much spare time on her hands, she'd needed outlets for her energy, lest her inactivity drive her into depression. She'd first turned to reading, which proved effective for a time to occupy her mind.
The new world she had transported the Enchanted Forest into had a selection of works from which to read that would dwarf the most impressive of collections back home. Even Rumplestiltskin's vast library could not boast the variety of subjects and styles that authors in this world wrote about. Regina especially enjoyed what people here deemed the classics, such a Shakespeare, Homer, and Dickens, though she also dabbled in historical nonfiction and political works. One of her guiltier pleasures was reading Robert Lewis Stephenson, Hans Christian Andersen, and the Grimm Brothers compilation of fairy tales, if only to laugh at the absurdities of their versions of the truth. And lastly, in order to be a more effective mayor, she had even resorted to reading assorted books of law in order to prop up her knowledge beyond what the Curse had provided for her.
But as with all things done over long periods of time, she grew tired of endless reading, for while it occupied her mind, her body lacked proper stimulation. To that end, she'd added more active pursuits to her repertoire such as gardening, cooking and baking, and had even learned to play the piano. However, none of her endeavors changed the way reality seemed to languish in a sort of suspended state of animation. Being the only person in a town of nearly two thousand inhabitants aware of the passage of time left for a lonely and static experience that tended to eventually suck the color out of everything. But now time appeared to be flowing in earnest once again, which presented a dramatic change from the status quo. It all started when Emma came to town.
Within hours of Emma's arrival, things began happening in a more precipitous way almost as if the dam of the curse that once held back time was losing its efficacy and had sprung a leak that Regina was unable to plug. But since breaking her long fast from Red, where once trickles slipped past the formerly impenetrable barrier, streams now flowed, which meant it was only a matter of time before those streams turned into torrential rivers. After that, all that would remain was for the dam to turn loose entirely. The curse, she realized, would soon be coming to an end, no matter what she did to prevent it.
The inevitability of that reality scared Regina more than she cared to admit, and for a variety of reasons, one of the foremost of which was the angry horde that would turn up at her door after their initial jubilation at being reunited with loved ones faded. When consciousness finally crashed down upon the citizens of Storybrooke as to just where they were and who was responsible for both sending them there and their decades long torment, there would be little that could stop them from seeking immediate recompense. It was likely that within hours of the Curse breaking a mob would turn up at her door either to demand her surrender or to take her by force.
The only silver lining to that likelihood was that with the end of the Curse, Regina assumed magic would return to her, so while a mob of frothing citizens bent on vengeance was always cause for alarm, she at least figured she could protect herself and those she loved. If need be, she could even teleport them all out of danger, and while she would be miserably sad over abandoning the life she'd built in this world, at least Henry and Ruby would be safe. But even more than the prospect of dying, Regina most feared the reactions of those two people, the two people closest to her heart and most capable of truly hurting her.
Henry, Regina thought, would have a predictable reaction. Because he already believed in the Curse and that she was the Evil Queen, that it broke and returned the people of Storybrooke to the Enchanted Forest selves would only vindicate his wrongly ignored assertions. When Henry realized the lengths she had gone to not only to cast the Curse in the first place but also to protect it as well, there was only one possible outcome she could foresee: she was going to lose her son. No doubt that would be devastating, but sadly enough the more she thought about it the more she realized she had been subconsciously preparing herself for that very moment since Emma Swan arrived in Storybrooke. And even though there was no use denying how heartbreaking it would be to witness Henry looking at her in the contemptuous way everyone else would, there was at least a sliver of hope that he wouldn't completely discard the good times he'd had with her over the 10 years she raised him or of these past 5 months in particular, which had been the best between them since he was very little.
Almost as a consequence of finally let her walls down for Ruby, Regina's relationship with her son had begun to improve dramatically. As his mother loosened up, Henry actually started to enjoy doing things with her again because, as he put it, she'd finally pulled her stick out of the mud. He was right. She had been undeniably happier of late, less caustic and more free with her smiles and laughs, and much less prone to the vicious mood swings that typified her behavior since the Savior came to town. And that, she knew, was mainly Ruby's doing, of which Henry only had a vague awareness and thus why she was currently trying to reach Ruby on the phone. Tonight, Regina planned to rectify her son's ignorance on the matter of the woman who had stolen back the heart that already rightfully belonged to her.
Henry being in the dark was not really his fault at all, however. It wasn't as if he was being willfully ignorant, but more that Regina had kept the true nature of her relationship with Ruby a secret from him. Because of Ruby's skittish behavior when she slept over that first night, Regina had determined to slowly but surely introducing her lover into her sons life on a more regular basis than being an impromptu babysitter. She had accomplished this mainly through weekly dinners to which Ruby was invited, attending under the guise of being Regina's friend when in reality Regina was just warming both of the people she loved up to being around one another on a more permanent basis. For the most part, Henry seemed to accept the reasoning but Regina could tell he detected a subtext that he did not have access to and which she was not yet ready to clarify. Whether he was being admirably considerate or biding his time to confront her, Regina didn't know but she was thankful nonetheless that he held his peace.
And so, over the course of the last few months, Henry had surpassed Regina's expectations, for though she had figured he would acclimate to Ruby rather slowly, on the contrary, the two soon grew close enough that Regina was now confident that it was time for him to know the truth, a decision which had been reinforced by his unsubtle hints.
Sometimes out of the blue, Henry would suggest in a joking way that with as much time as she was spending at their house, Ruby ought to just come live with them. The hinting did not occur often but it happened enough that Regina began to wonder whether or not he knew more than he was letting on. Henry had always been precocious, so she would not be terribly surprised if he had figured things out on his own, yet that did not mean she was excused from the responsibility of being openly honest with her son. As his mother, she owed it him.
With that in mind, she decided that tonight was the night for honesty. The only thing she needed to happen now was for Ruby to accept her invitation to dinner.
Deciding to give it one more go, she dialed the number she knew by heart and waited as the phone rang 4 times. Sighing, she was about to replace the receiver in its cradle when the call connected.
"Granny's Diner," a very welcome and very familiar voice answered, "this is Ruby. How can I help you?"
Smiling as always at the sound of Ruby's voice, Regina took a moment to let it permeate her being. Just as it always did, the soothing tone settled in her chest, banishing her anxiety and frustration. With a deep sigh, she relaxed into her chair and replied, "For starters, you can be to my house for dinner by 6 pm sharp."
"Regina? Hey!" Ruby responded in a slightly affected way. Quite probably, Regina thought, she had been taken aback by the unexpected dinner invitation. Ruby then took a deep breath that Regina heard through the phone and when she next spoke her voice sounded distinctly nervous. "Not that I'm not glad to hear from you, but…did I forget something? A, it's not Friday, and B, I thought Henry was with you tonight."
Regina nodded even though she knew Ruby couldn't see her. "He is. Thus my invitation."
A space of silence ensued during which Regina fiddled with the phone cord, twirling it about her fingers and then unwinding it. She repeated this process twice before Ruby responded.
"I don't understand."
Regina hummed invitingly. "Then I guess you'll just have to come by tonight and find out."
"Alright," Ruby sighed with a longsuffering quality. "I suppose I can reshuffle my plans around."
Frowning, Regina gave a slighted harrumph. "Well, I wouldn't want to inconvenience you. If you've made other plans..."
"No, no," Ruby interjected, "it's nothing major. Nothing that can't be done another night. You know I'll take any time I can get with you."
Regina relaxed her head back against the headrest with an affected smile. Though she never said so, it was always nice for her to hear such affirmations of how much Ruby was invested in their relationship.
"I know, dear," she then replied. "That's one of the things I'm hoping to set right tonight."
When Ruby let out a curious sound, Regina could almost see her expressive eyes narrowing. "So mysterious." There was an exaggerated sense of interest in her tone. "Care to give me any hints?"
Regina chuckled at the playful tone of Ruby's request, responding in kind. "As I said, you'll just have to come find out. Can I count on you to be there?"
"You absolutely can," Ruby enthusiastically answered, smiling widely now judging by the inflection in her voice. "Any particular dress code?"
That was a standard question for Ruby on their dates. Most of the time Ruby seemed content to let Regina set the pace and dictate the terms of their dates, though there were times Regina wished she would be a bit more assertive. Though Regina was a person who very much liked being in charge, she'd asked Ruby about three weeks ago why she hardly ever suggested activities for their dates. The reply she received absolutely floored her.
Ruby had said that before dating Regina, she was usually the instigator in her relationships, so she actually liked the change of pace. And what's more, she went on to say, she felt safe enough with Regina to trust that she understood her and knew what she would enjoy and what she wouldn't. The implicit message was that Ruby trusted Regina not only with her body but with her heart as well. It was the first time that Regina wasn't listening for Red in Ruby's voice but was actually hearing what Ruby was saying for her own sake, and doing so made Regina aware of something critically important that she hadn't anticipated at all.
For 28 years, she had never stopped loving Red, but to her delight and horror, she realized she was falling in love with Ruby, too. It had taken that unspoken declaration for her to realize it. For whatever reason, she had never really stopped to consider the possibility that she might develop feelings for Ruby that were separate for what she felt for Red, but that's exactly what had happened, and once again, she was rendered speechless by the unintended consequences of the Curse.
Thinking back after that revelation, it was clear she had been wrong about a great many things.
Because of the way the Curse worked she had not only dismissed the possibility that she might develop feelings for Ruby Lucas, Red's cursed persona, but she also didn't believe it possible for Ruby to entertain true feelings for her. It was a funny thing, the Dark Curse, in that it was more than a bit diabolically ironic in nature, which incidentally was one of the reasons Regina had loved it so much. In a very metaphorical manner, it turned things upside down, including people and their behaviors.
Most people tended to think that their core personality could never be changed, which was actually true, and what made the curse especially delicious. The so-called heroes in the Enchanted Forest always thought of themselves as unflappable paragons of virtue that were above such petty emotions as hatred, bigotry, vengeance, and unforgiveness, so to suggest that it was possible to curse them into behaving against their true natures was inconceivable to them. Now, to their credit, most of them irrefutably conducted themselves as if absent of character flaws, particularly Snow White and her beloved Pretender Prince, but had that truly been the case, the curse could not have worked.
What made the Dark Curse so insidious, so wickedly wonderful, was that it did not transplant personalities but rather unleashed them. Those heroes who extolled themselves to be kind became cruel because deep down inside they harbored a secret malice that they were able to contain so long as they were in control of themselves. Similarly, the gentle found their inner beast unleashed, the patient found themselves being as recklessly impulsive as their subconscious had always craved to be, and the virtuous found themselves behaving as though unyieldingly depraved. All of these heinous attributes were not constructs of the curse but aspects of that person's character which they kept chained under lock and key lest those they care for discover their secret ugliness. This rather delicious nature of the curse made for what Regina liked to refer to as a grand unveiling of the hypocrites, an ultimate spectacle of the sordid depths of human nature, and it was all for her singular pleasure. That is why she loved the Curse so much.
But considering those principles, she'd thought Red's cursed personality would loathe her at the very least. Despite Red being her lover, Regina had never been in doubt that at least some part of the girl harbored hatred and resentment for her. After all, she was the woman who existed to destroy Red's best friend and because of whom Red had to live a life on the run. Even during their year long affair in the Enchanted Forest, Regina had still exercised her cruelty frequently enough that Red witnessed it from time to time. Whenever that happened, she would invariably be greeted by disapproving scowls from her lover. Red never did approve of her darker tendencies.
Yet, to her great surprise, the first time she entered Granny's Diner, she was not met by a disapproving or judgmental glare but rather by a genuine smile so wide and beautiful that it seemed as if Ruby was genuinely glad to see her. However, instead of bringing her comfort as it should have, it only increased her misery, for such treatment proved once and for all that Red had truly loved Regina and much more than she thought was possible. That the curse could not modify those feelings or subvert them in any way suggested that Red's love may have even been of the true variety, and when faced with that possibility, Regina had fled the Diner not to return until a month passed because she was incapable of bearing to look at Ruby knowing the truth of what she had given up. She had lost True Love once, so to face that she'd lost it a second time by her own hand was more than she could stand.
It was only because of the rumors that soon started concerning Ruby's promiscuity that she was able to move on with life at all. Unable to deal with even the thought of another hand touching the body that belonged to her, she shut herself off emotionally. Of all the people she'd ever met, Red had been the most above reproach and the least deserving of the injustices of the Curse, which is why Regina had taken great pains to spare her. Yet when Ruby confirmed the validity of the rumors on their very first date, Regina realized that the Curse had only failed where Red was concerned and it was only in the last few weeks that she began to feel secure enough in their relationship to actually contemplate why that was.
Every other construct of the curse had obeyed her will to a tee except for keeping Emma Swan out of Storybrooke and providing a comfortable and happy life for Red. Somehow in those two things the Curse had directly disobeyed her. As far as Emma was concerned, Regina could understand why the magical barrier that sealed the town had not performed as advertised. It had been Henry, after all, that sought Emma out and brought her to town, and because he was born in this world, he was not subject to the power of the Curse. Thus, the barrier did not prevent him from leaving or returning. But what Regina could not make sense of was why her sincere desire that Red be happy was somehow turned on its head in such an awful way as it was.
For a while, she'd actually considered the possibility that the Curse may have been constructed to be semi-sentient for flexibility's sake and that it had purposely warped her will for Red as a punishment for her error. The notion was so absurd she all but dismissed it out of hand. Magic could do many things but it could not create life from nothing. When babies like Emma were conceived out of True Love, it was more like the conception was guided along by magic rather than a human being actually being created magically. Magic only took what was already living there and worked with it, enhanced it, blessed it as it were. But it could not give true life to that which was previously inanimate. At best, those things were reflections of the magicians who created them, obeying simplified codes of standards to which their creators adhered.
With that possibility eliminated, Regina was left with few alternatives, all but one of which she dismissed as implausible. As such, she had a pretty good idea of what, or more aptly who, was responsible for Red's miseries and his name was Rumplestiltskin.
It wasn't long after she and Ruby started seeing each other that the erstwhile Mr. Gold all but bluntly confirmed that his memories had returned and his first order of business after that was to rub Ruby's sordid affairs in her face. After that meeting in the Sheriff's station, Regina had gone home enraged. It was only Ruby's incessant pleading over the phone that calmed her rampaging fury and kept her from doing something stupid. But even so, Regina had not forgotten those heavy-handed implications, and one thing was for certain: if magic ever returned, she was going to settle the score with that imp on Red's behalf. Until then, however, she was just glad she was able to restore Red to some measure of her former self.
Thankfully, over the past 5 months Ruby's curse-constructed wildness had tempered to almost negligible levels, and with every day that passed, she was less and less Ruby and more and more Red. Even though that was a relief to Regina, it also meant that the day was drawing ever more near in which the Curse would finally break and when it did, she was going to have to answer for her crimes not only to the people of Storybrooke but to Red as well. But before that happened, she had to make sure that Ruby understood just how much she meant to her.
"Hello?" Ruby spoke up, breaking Regina's contemplations.
Sighing, Regina apologized. "I got lost in thought. Dress casually. It'll just be a simple and relaxed affair for family members only."
"Family?" Ruby echoed, her voice wavering with emotion at the implication that she was included in that category.
"Why, of course," Regina emphatically confirmed, wanting Ruby to know she hadn't misspoken but saving elaboration for later. "So, I'll see you tonight?"
"Sure," Ruby breathed into the speaker, clearly still reeling. "I mean, yes! I can't wait."
There was a reason Regina had worded her invitation in the way that she did, for to her, Ruby was already a member of her family and it was high past time for it to be made official. Tonight, she planned on doing two things which would accomplish that objective. Firstly, she was going to reveal their relationship to her son and secondly, she was going to ask Ruby to move into the mansion. Both were enormously important steps in their relationship, one Regina would normally have not been so quick to take but for her impatience to forge a deeper commitment with Ruby.
The urge to move forward was not new, though it had become more prevalent as time wore on. With the curse poised to be broken at any moment, Regina recognized that there was not much time left to waste. It was of the utmost importance then that she utilize what time she had left to show Red that she was not the same woman who had chosen revenge over love, that she was willing to give everything up if only to be with her. She only hoped the gesture would not be too much too soon for either Ruby or Henry to deal with.
Considering her son's aforementioned hints, she didn't think he would object, but she could never be completely sure, which was why she was going to talk to him first before mentioning anything to Ruby. Only with Henry's approval would she make such a decision that was bound to have a profound impact on his life. Though she was fairly certain Henry would approve of Ruby living with them, she was not nearly so confident as far as Ruby went.
While it was entirely possible that Ruby might be ecstatic, it was also possible that she would bolt. How she reacted to Regina's proposal hinged on which aspect of Ruby was most in control. Over the past several months, Red had increasingly emerged from her curse-dormant state to influence the way Ruby acted and felt, but there were still times that Regina could see none of Red's boldness and strength, smothered as they were by Ruby's insecurities. As such, Regina estimated the odds to be about 50/50 as to whether or not Ruby would freak the hell out, and those odds, she decided, were about as good as she was going to get.
Looking at her watch, Regina noted it was high past time for her to get busy with finishing Emma's reports and requisitions so that she could sign off on them. Since she needed to get home early enough to prepare for the night ahead, she was going to have to put the pedal to the metal, so to speak.
"I look forward to it, then," Regina said in response to Ruby's acceptance as she shuffled around papers, looking for the latest arrest report Emma had issued for Leeroy. She couldn't wait to read yet another summation of how stupidly a drunken dwarf could behave. "Until tonight."
"See you tonight," Ruby replied, but before hanging up she called out once more. "Hey, Regina?"
"Yes, dear?"
"I..." she began, floundering for a moment. Regina knew what Ruby wanted to say but was not quite ready to hear it, and certainly not over the phone.
"I know, Ruby," she said instead, her voice soft though her heart began to flutter anxiously. "I'll see you tonight."
"Okay," Ruby breathed, a bit of disappointment coming through in her voice. "Bye."
"Goodbye, dear."
And with that Regina hung up.
Flopping back into her chair, she sighed. She hadn't handled that last bit as gracefully as she could have but she'd been battling a minor panic attack. Many times, Ruby had almost said those three little words, but each time, Regina interrupted her. She could not afford for them to be spoken yet, afraid of what might happen if her assumption was correct regarding the depths of Ruby's feelings for her. If she was right, the end of the curse might very well be nigh at hand and with it, the end of this time of happiness in her life. Perhaps it would even mean the end of her life.
Although she was not by any means ready to die, perhaps that was not something she had any control over, and that, along with the prospect of losing Red and Henry for good, scared Regina witless.
Later on that afternoon, Regina was putting the finishing touches on dinner (a nice pot roast with assorted vegetables, one of Ruby's favorites) when she heard the jingling of keys in the front door. Ruby had arrived right on time, which was sort of unusual for her younger lover. Ruby was not known to be the most punctual person in the world, but she always made an effort for Regina's sake, which was enough most of the time to quell the offended sensibilities of a former Queen.
As she heard Ruby make her way through the hallway, Regina felt her throat clam up. The moment was now upon her and she was growing more and more anxious by the second. To be honest, a part of her felt like she was about to go on trial to be judged by the two people whose opinions she most valued while the other part felt like she was about to open a door that would either lead to her death or to the end of her happily ever after. Against all better sense, she had given the power to break her to not only her son but to her lover as well, and with so much at stake, it was a wonder she wasn't holed up in her bathroom puking her guts out.
As a Queen, Regina had been in some very high pressure situations, but none of them left her feeling so miserably weak and out of sorts as she currently felt. So much hinged on what was about to happen that the tension coiling in her chest was almost unbearable. What if Henry rejected her relationship with Ruby? What if Ruby rejected her offer? What if the happiness she had built with them over the past five months was shattered in one mortal blow? The thought was enough to make her stomach roll violently.
But then as if she were being guided by the hand of fate or some other celestial force and as if she too understood the gravity of what was about to happen, Ruby appeared around the corner dressed in the same outfit she'd worn on their first date. In that very instant, Regina's heart gave a lurch, feeling a subtle sensation growing within her heart: hope. Clinging to that with all her might, she faced her lover, ready as she would ever be to take on whatever challenges came her way from the fallout of what she was about to do.
And then Ruby gave her a smile, and not just an ordinary one, but one of the kind that no one else got to see but Regina, the kind that was like a portrait of pure sunshine painted across her face or a window which opened to reveal the persistently bright light that lived within her heart. Ruby was saying through her expression what Regina hadn't allowed her to over the phone. It was a silent "I love you." Again, hope flared dangerously within Regina's breast, so powerful that it nearly brought her to her knees.
"Hey," Ruby greeted, a hushed whisper that was expressing so much more than the one syllable of its sound.
"Hey yourself," Regina replied, bringing her hand up over her heart where the organ was beating with more strength than it had in untold years.
A concerned look spread across Ruby's face as she approached. "You okay?" she asked.
"Yes, of course," Regina replied, clearing her voice and straightening her back. She smoothed a hand self-consciously over her lavender blouse, smoothing out wrinkles that were not there.
Ruby did not appear convinced by her assurance. "You sure?" she asked, laying a gentle hand on Regina's elbow. "You're a little flushed. You're not sick or anything are you?"
"It's just hot in here," Regina explained, smiling so as to set Ruby at ease. "Dinner is almost ready. If you'll go have a seat in the living room, I need to have a talk with Henry first. Is that okay?"
"Sure, sure," Ruby nodded. "I'll just head in there, but first..."
Trailing off, Ruby leaned in for a kiss, which Regina gratefully accepted. As their lips lingered together, Regina indulged in a calm moment of domestic happiness, surrounded not only by her feelings of affection for Ruby but by Ruby's mutual adoration. The comfortable familiarity of Ruby's kisses always gave her a feeling of belonging and acceptance of the sort she'd yearned to experience since she was a child.
After parting, Regina couldn't help but be captivated by the sweet yet half-dopey smile on her lover's face. Flooded by need, she pressed in once more, rejoining their lips. She breathed into the kiss, savoring the taste of the woman she loved.
"Mmm," Ruby hummed after Regina broke away again a few moments later. "I was happy with the first kiss but thank you for the second."
With a husky laugh, Regina grasped Ruby by the shoulders and then turned her toward the door. "You're welcome," she said and then swatted Ruby's jean-clad rear. "Now go sit while I finish dinner."
Looking back over her shoulder with a scandalized expression, Ruby's gaze narrowed. Regina could already see the wheels turning. She was going to pay for that later. For a split second, she saw a mischievous glint pass through Ruby's eyes, which made her wary that Ruby might retaliate in a more immediate fashion, but then her face relaxed into a more affable expression. "Yes, ma'am," she replied with a playful salute, and then made her way out of the kitchen as instructed.
Chuckling, Regina returned to the oven to lower the heat so that the roast wouldn't burn while she was talking to Henry and Ruby. Since she was back in the vicinity, she rechecked to ensure that everything was suitably prepared. It was. The salad was tossed and waiting in the refrigerator along with the Spanish rice pudding she'd made the night before for Henry. Seeing as it was one of Ruby's favorites as well, she figured she couldn't go wrong even with it being reheated.
When she was sure everything was in order, she took a deep breath, wiped her hands down on her apron and then removed the garment. Before leaving the kitchen, she folded it and placed it on the counter-top, making a mental note to come back for it later to put it in the laundry. Since everything was ready, she had no more reason to procrastinate. It was time to face the music.
Squaring her shoulders, she made her way upstairs to Henry's room and knocked on his door once she reached it.
"Come in," he replied from inside.
Regina opened the door and stepped into the room. To her surprise, Henry was sitting on the edge of his bed waiting for her, his hands clasped tightly together with a very apprehensive look on his face.
Rushing over to him, Regina knelt down and rested a hand on his knee. Large uncertain eyes met hers. "What's wrong, sweetheart?" she asked, concerned by his state.
"What's tonight about, Mom?" was his response, his voice strained with an unidentifiable quality.
Regina was confused by the inquiry. "What do you mean?"
With a prolonged sigh, Henry averted his gaze to his window, looking out of it forlornly as if searching for an answer in the stars. "I mean with Ruby," he said. "I know you guys are going out...I mean, 'dating'," he clarified with air quotes after turning back to his mother, using his best grown-up impression. "But I think it's a lot more than that."
Regina was momentarily taken aback. She had come upstairs all ready to confess the true nature of her relationship with Ruby to her son and here he was dropping the bomb on her that he'd already known. While it wasn't wholly surprising, she hadn't really prepared herself to deal with the actuality of such a development, though she probably should have.
Not quite sure how to respond, she leaned back a bit to study her son's face. He had the look of a person who knew a secret that was being kept from him and was determined to have it out in the open no matter the consequence. For such a young boy, it was surprisingly intimidating look.
"H-how so?"
Shrugging boyishly, that aura of severity slipped a bit and he replied, "I see the way you guys look at each other. I'm a kid, Mom but I'm not dumb. Emma's not either 'cause she's seen it, too."
Eyes wide, Regina sat back on her legs, stunned for a moment by Henry's confession. "Emma knows about Ruby and me?"
"Yep," Henry answered, popping the 'p' overly loud, a habit he'd picked up from his generally annoying birth mother. "A month or so ago," he went on to explain, "I was out with Emma in the park and we saw you guys kissing near the lake. She was kinda mad. I had to tell her you've been 'dating' Ruby for a while now."
Narrowing her eyes, Regina fixed Henry with a glare. "What is with this whole...'dating' thing you're doing?"
Again, Henry shrugged. "I just didn't want to embarrass you."
"And just how might you embarrass me by referring to my relationship with Ruby?"
"You know," he said, gesturing his arms in the air, "that you guys are having sex."
"Henry!" Regina gasped. For a moment she sat there gaping at her now blushing son. "I hardly know what to say to that," she began after a moment, "but as your mother, I suppose I need to know: how do you know I'm having sex with Ruby and how do you even know what sex is? You're 10 years old for heaven's sake."
"Kids talk," he explained matter-of-factly as if his mother should already be aware of that. "I've known what sex is for a while now, doesn't mean I don't think it's gross though."
Regina sighed. "Well, that's a relief, at least. But you didn't answer my other question."
Blushing to the tips of his toes, Henry averted his gaze. "Remember that time Mary Margaret spilled coffee on Ruby's shirt?" Regina nodded. The coffee had been scalding hot and left burns on Ruby's chest that, although faint, were still visible to this day. "Then you also remember that she took her shirt off right there in the diner." Again, Regina nodded, pinching her nose between her fingers. She thought she had an idea of where Henry was going with this. "Well, I kinda got an eyeful, Mom. Not that I was trying to, though. I mean, she was just standing there in the middle of the diner in her red bra..."
"Alright, alright, I get it," Regina interrupted, not wanting to hear anymore of her son's firsthand knowledge of Ruby's bra color. "But why did that particular...event...convince you that…you know," she faltered lamely.
"That you're having sex with Ruby?" Henry bluntly supplied.
"Henry! Tact."
"Sorry," he shrugged, clearly not sorry at all. "Anyway, a couple months ago I ran out of toothpaste so I went into your room to get some. When I was walking past the bed, I saw something sticking out from underneath it. I was curious, so I picked it up."
"And it was Ruby's red bra," they both said at the same time, smiling at each other despite the awkward nature of the conversation.
"So, if you've known all this time, why didn't you say anything?" she asked. "Come to think of it, why didn't Emma say anything either?"
"I wasn't sure what you were doing with her," was his vague answer. "I'm still not. That's why Emma kept quiet, too."
Though she thought she understood the implication, she wasn't certain enough to confront it, so she drew her brows together and frowned at her son. "What's that supposed to mean?"
Instead of answering her question, Henry brushed a hand through his short hair, obviously a bit frightened at Regina's hard-set expression. He then went on to further his prevarication. "You know, Emma thinks this is all a ruse, that you're just 'playing house' with Ruby to throw her off and that when you're done with that, you'll get tired of Ruby and move on."
Although Henry had used the guise of Emma's opinion on the situation, Regina could tell he at least partially, if not fully, shared it. The terrible nature of the accusation was so astonishing that she had to cover her mouth to keep from gasping aloud. How could he think she would use Ruby and then toss her away like so much trash?
Since learning he was adopted, Henry had said many mean things to her, such as that she wasn't really his mom, or that she couldn't really love him because she didn't give birth to him, and while those things hurt – and a lot at that – they were not totally unexpected. As only a true cynic could, she'd been preparing herself for those kinds of barbs almost from the moment she adopted him. But to hear Henry accuse her – albeit in a roundabout way – of using Ruby in such a deplorable way was like a resounding slap in her face.
But it also made her realize just how disgustingly cruel she'd been herself over the years. While reigning as Queen, she had used many, many people in many ways, some of them sexual in nature, some of them not. Thinking of Graham, her heart constricted in her chest. It was her sexual conquests that had her reeling at the moment, because in the end, the results of such dalliances were always the same: Regina got what she wanted and left at best a broken shell of a person behind. So, while it hurt that her son thought she was using Ruby, it wasn't beyond the realm of possibility, which was what hurt most of all.
"Is that what you think I'm doing?" she asked Henry, searching his eyes for an answer.
Ducking his head, Henry replied sorrowfully, "I don't know. I don't want to! But when Emma came to town, you got so mean and did so many terrible things..."
A wounded sound tore from Regina's throat as turned her face to hide her reaction. Henry's suggestion had been painful to confront, but now she understood why he had come to such a conclusion. Somewhere along the way, she had made her own son question as to whether or not she was capable of love at all. With a 10 year old boy's logical capability, it was easy to make the connection that if she was incapable of loving Ruby, perhaps she was not even capable of loving him, and that Henry had any cause to doubt her love for him was perhaps the worst failing possible for her as a mother.
Once again, she thought miserably, her pain was the product of her own actions. More and more, she was beginning to see that she was at fault for most of her own suffering, and as such, she could no longer justifiably heap the responsibility on her mother, Rumplestilstkin or Snow White. In one conversation, Henry had obliterated her twisted rationale for casting the Curse in the first place.
"Oh, Henry," she cried, battling tears as she returned her gaze to her son, searching him for any indication that he was willing to forgive her. "I know I've messed up but haven't I been better? I thought things were getting better with us, that you could see how much I'm trying. Yes, I was wrong to behave the way I did with Emma, I admit that and I'm sorry for it, but I was scared. I know that doesn't excuse my actions, though."
When Henry didn't answer, she tipped his chin up so that he was looking at her and fixed him with an intently pleading look. "Can I ask you a question that you will promise to answer honestly?" When he nodded, Regina took his hand. "Do you believe that I love you?"
Biting his bottom lip, Henry nodded again, causing Regina to sigh with relief. "Good," she breathed, "because I do. So much. More than anything. More than my own life."
Seeming to accept her words as truth, Henry squeezed her hand, further reassuring Regina that her son was not yet lost to her.
"And Ruby?" he then asked, his eyes still holding an uncertainty that pricked at her heart.
"Would it bother you if I didn't love her?" she asked, probing carefully around the edges of the question to draw out why he was so interested in this that he risked his mother's famous wrath to confront her. She needed to know if it was because of his suspicion of her or his concern for Ruby's welfare.
"Yes!" Henry suddenly shouted, his face growing angry. "It would be wrong, Mom! Ruby is so nice, and she's pretty and cool, and she's such a good person. And she loves you. She deserves to be happy, so if you don't love her, then you have to stop this right now!"
"Okay, okay," Regina soothed, smiling in spite of her son's righteous anger. When he caught her reaction to his tirade, Henry looked at her as if she had grown two heads.
"Why are you not mad?" he asked, his eyes narrowed.
In response, Regina chuckled and lifted her hand to Henry's cheek. To her relief, he did not turn away, but accepted the gesture, though she could still feel the heat of his anger in his cheeks.
"Because you care," she explained, still smiling. "All of this is not just about you being angry with me but because you care about Ruby, too – enough to yell at me for hurting her. It lets me know that you'll be okay with what I'm about to tell you."
"Which is?"
"Henry," Regina began after clearing her throat, "how would you feel if there was someone else living here besides us?"
When the question registered, Henry's mouth fell open for a moment. He looked almost disbelieving. "You mean Ruby?"
Regina returned her hand to Henry's. "Yes. Even though you haven't know the entire time, we've been together nearly six months now and I want to ask her to come live with us. That is, if it's alright with you."
Disbelief faded away from Henry's face to be replaced by muted excitement. "Really?"
"Yes, really."
Narrowing his eyes once more, he asked, "Why?"
Regina knew what he was asking and for once in her life, was prepared to give the answer. "Because I love her." Now that it was out in the open, Regina felt a weight lift off of her shoulders. For the first time in 28 years, she was free to openly admit she loved Red. It was an incredible feeling. "I love her," she continued, now smiling uncontrollably, "and I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I consider her a member of our family, so she belongs here with us."
"Does she know that?" he asked, his eyes betraying a wisdom that was far beyond his years.
Somewhat ashamedly, Regina shook her head. "Not yet. But there's a reason for that. While all that I've said is true – that I want Ruby to be a permanent part of this family – it can't happen without your approval. You are my son and this is your home, too. So, if you're uncomfortable with this in any way, please tell me, because you are under no pressure or obligation here. It's okay for you to say no, Henry, and if you do, we'll table this discussion for later."
Leaning forward intently, Regina made sure Henry was looking straight at her before speaking her next words. In her most kindly authoritarian tone, she then informed him: "However, I also want you to understand one other thing, sweetheart: my accommodation in this matter is limited. While I love you and won't force you to accept Ruby living here, I'm not asking for your permission to be with her. I want her in my life – no, I need her in my life. She gives me balance and she makes me happy. However, if that makes you uncomfortable, I'm willing to compromise by not spending any time with her while you're at home."
As if seeing his mother for the first time, Henry studied Regina's face, watching her carefully as she spoke. It was, she thought, as if he were searching for something, which he evidently saw judging by the smile that overtook his face.
"You don't have to do that, Mom," he said, squeezing her hand again. "I'm cool with you and Ruby. I just needed to know for sure that what Emma thought wasn't true. For a long time, I believed her, but I can tell you're being honest when you say you love Ruby."
Though Regina breathed an enormous sigh of relief at her son's acceptance, she recognized that he had left one very important thing unaddressed. "While I would love to talk more about Miss Swan and her opinions, and while I'm relieved you accept our relationship, you didn't tell me how you feel about Ruby moving in."
At that, Henry gave a nonchalant tilt of his head. "It's fine with me. Ruby's awesome. She's funny and is amazing at soccer, so she can teach me to play. And besides, I wouldn't mind someone living here who can actually beat my time at Arkham City."
"Oh, yeah?" Regina grinned, poking Henry's ribs. He gave a stunted laugh that was mostly boyish squeal accompanied by a dash of fledgling manly bark. "So she's cool because she's good at video games, huh? Well, one of these days I'll just have to you show you both who's boss."
"Please, Mom," Henry scoffed, rolling his eyes in a way very similar to her own. "You're hopeless at PlayStation and you know it."
"That's because I haven't really tried," she countered stubbornly. "But now that I've been challenged, you'll find that maybe your Mom has a few tricks up her sleeves that you don't know about."
"Right," Henry drawled. "So. When is dinner? 'Cause I'm starving." And just like that, the serious conversation was over.
Henry was always thinking with his stomach. Come to think of it, so was Ruby. So, if Ruby agreed to move in, Regina realized she was going to be living with two children instead of one. When considering that, she wasn't sure whether to laugh or groan.