Chapter 9 – Downward Spiral

Monday, March 11th, 2024

"How is he doing?"

"He is broken Cody,"

"Shit,"

"He isn't good," I answered, my eyes drifted to the closed bedroom door where Troy had been since his surgery two days ago. "Has he done much?"

"He does his hand exercises twice as much as he should and I tried telling him that it could hurt him in the long run but what the hell do I know right?" Cody groaned, "I thought about flying out,"

"No, it's okay. He is flying home soon with Logan to see some of the doctors and physical therapists up there for a couple of days. I think he leaves Saturday," I answered, Cody sighed, "Is Logan staying with you?"

"Yes, my dad is down here."

"Did he get anywhere with Troy?"

"No,"

"I mean, I knew that he would be devastated and he called me upset about the MRI that needed to happen but he thought it could be strained or whatever but then when you called…"

"Has he talked to you since?"

"No," Cody responded, "I have called him twice but he doesn't answer."

"I have never seen him like this."

"Can you imagine him having to retire?"

"Cody, please, do not speak of those dark days." Cody laughed and Logan came skidding around the corner, "I made daddy something!"

"You did, let me see!" I took the paper as it had 'Get well Soon' at the top of the page, I smiled as I handed it back to her with her colorful drawing. "Do you want to go show daddy?" she nodded as she ran off to his room. I smiled as she opened the door, "Daddy,"

Troy didn't say anything in response causing me to frown; I leaned in the doorway as I let Cody listen in on the conversation. "What?" his voice was bare, nothing inside of it. "I made you something," Troy looked at Logan and she seemed scared, this wasn't her dad. This was some mutation of him.

"Let me see," the softer side coming out as he took the card and smiled, "I love it Logi, but I'm tired," she then nodded her head, "Come here baby girl," I looked over at Troy and he looked at me. Nothing was inside of his eyes, it's like the life got sucked out of them. I moved out of the doorway, "Cody,"

"I'll talk to him when I see him, he has to be upset Gabi. He has played baseball every summer since he was three."

"He can't be surprised." I mumbled, "His elbow hurt at the end of last season. He knew the team wanted an MRI. How can he be shocked?"

"He is probably in denial about this,"

"Yea well, we have to move on with life."

"Gabs,"

"Cody, I can play nice but if I did this he would be angry,"

"Don't play this cat and mouse game with him, he needs your support right now."

"I'm not going to be a bitch,"

"I have to go, I'll try to call him again tonight."

"Thank you,"

I hung up as I went to make sure Logan had something to play with before going back to the bedroom. He was looking at his cell phone as I crawled onto the bed. "Troy," his elbow was in a sling, "Hm?"

"You okay?"

He shrugged his shoulders, "I'm sorry," I said, the only thing I could say to him. "I'm fine." His voice was bitter, "You should go to the clubhouse today," I recommended, "Go spend time with the team, talk with Jason,"

"Gabi, I'm fine," his voice was venom, nothing like how he talked to Logan just a minute ago. I only nodded my head as I went to get up, "I'm taking Logan to the park with me,"

"Whatever,"

I turned around to look at him but then walked away, it wasn't worth the fight today. I wasn't in the mood for a fight today. I shut the door on my way out as I slipped on my flats and the door opened.

"Papi!"

Logan launched herself onto my dad and I smiled at him, "Hey,"

"How are you?"

"Good," I hugged him; "I wish I could say the same about my husband though." My dad sighed, "I came to talk to him today."

"Well I hope you get more than I can get out of him."

"Is he in pain?"

"I wouldn't know. He won't talk to me." My dad frowned, "When you called me and told me that,"

"Dad, I have never seen him that upset before." I answered, my dad looked at me and he just nodded his head. "He feels like he is failing his team."

"Yea well, shit happens." I answered, "I have to go. I have a meeting. Do you want to keep Logan? Or do you want me to take her with me?"

"Not letting Troy keep her?" I laughed aloud, "So she can feed herself? Entertain herself? He barely gets out of bed since his surgery." My voice was tempered and upset and my dad nodded, "Okay, I'll keep her. You have a good afternoon. Maybe go out with one of the girls," I breathed frustration as my dad patted my shoulder, "Okay?"

I just nodded my head and turned to grab my bag before fleeing out the door.

Troy's POV

I walked out into the living room to see Alex and Logan playing with each other on the floor. "Troy," Alex quickly stood up, my medication has kept me pretty knocked out since my surgery. "Alex,"

Going to the fridge, using my damn right hand, I did everything. Everything had to be done with my right hand until next week.

"You okay?"

"Peachy." I muttered, "Logan, can you go to your room for a couple of minutes," Logan huffed but stood up and walked to her room. "What?"

"Troy, come on, why are you being this way?"

"I don't know, I guess that maybe I just had season ending surgery,"

"Better than career ending surgery," my eyes looked over at him, "Is there a point for you bring here?"

"Why is Gabi leaving Logan with me when you are here?"

"My medication has been making me fuzzy,"

"Not what she told me, she told me that you aren't even talking to her."

"I guess I'm not in the mood to talk?"

Alex just nodded his head; "I'm going to take Logan to the park. Do you want to come?"

"I think I'll stay here."

Alex and Logan left, Logan kind of looked at me and then looked away as she wasn't sure of me. My heart sank but I turned around to look at the wall. I then felt her arms around my leg as I looked down at her, "Bye daddy," I closed me eyes and then knelled over, I kissed the top of her head as she then went running after Alex. I sank into the couch as I rubbed my face; I picked up my cell phone and decided that it was time to call Cody.

"Bolton," he answered, I breathed, "Hi,"

"You know…I don't like going five days without talking to you. I miss out on some good stuff and Ben has been asking about you."

"Haven't felt up to talking lately,"

"Troy, Gabi is freaked out,"

"This is what she does when things happens,"

"And she lets you comfort her,"

"Not last time,"

"Troy, listen, talk to her? Okay, she needs you to talk to her because she is getting angry with you."

"And I am angry with her,"

Cody went quiet, "Why?"

"She can't have a damn baby," my voice sneered, "You don't mean that," Cody said quietly, I looked at the wall, "By God, Troy if you ever say that to her I will kick your ass. I want to kick your ass for just telling that to me. Are you drunk?"

"I fucking wish,"

"You are being ridiculous Troy, she left to go see her mom after her third miscarriage. You were working and she wasn't in a stable position to take care of Logan. She was back within a week, you have shut her out for a week now so aren't we even?"

I rolled my lips, "She didn't just put out of her job for a year."

"Troy, you had to know it was going to happen eventually. You throw hard and you have been throwing since you were ten. You are almost thirty,"

Kicking the carpet around, "I get paid to pitch, I don't get paid to sit on my ass."

"And you won't be. You'll be doing all of your exercises. Why don't you just go down to the clubhouse today? Visit the guys, talk to Jason, Zach and Josh are kind of freaked out." I sighed, "I don't know if I could face them yet,"

"You are going to have to eventually,"

"I let them down."

"It happens Troy,"

"I have put on the DL once since I came to the major leagues for a twisted ankle. I only needed two starts off but they made me rest. I hated that. Now I have to wait a whole fucking year?" Cody sighed, "Man, you'll be fine. You guys will be fine. The team will be fine. You can travel with the team all year. Gabi will still be broadcasting, you rehab with the team and you work hard. It's all you can do. You can't talk to your body and say don't break."

"I could,"

"You couldn't and shouldn't have done anything different. You have been spectacular in all of your years in the MLB. You have to understand that," I sighed and I leaned into the couch, "Fine, I will go see the guys today. Go watch the game."

"Good, Gabi told me you were coming up here soon?"

"Yes, I have a meeting with the Physical Therapist and a doctor to look at it. Make sure it is healing well."

"Don't over do it okay?"

"Thanks mom,"

"You aren't talking to anybody else Troy, I have to voice motherly opinions somewhere,"

"I'm listening to Gabi,"

"Are you really? What I heard earlier was you don't want much to do with her."

"I am frustrated,"

"She is just as frustrated. She understands how much this hurts."

"I gotta go man,"

"Okay" he said, "Okay,"

Gabi's POV

I stood up as I greeted Gordon with a laugh as we were doing an interview with him. "Did you see Troy?" I raised an eyebrow, "Troy is here?" he nodded his head, "Yea, he just showed up. I didn't know if you knew he was coming."

My smile faltered as I looked at Gordon, "Well…he isn't saying much to me lately."

"He'll come around," I just nodded as I then conducted the interview asking about his thoughts on the coming season and what he thinks will improve over the next year. I asked his opinions on how he thinks Spring Training was going and then I ended the interview thanking him.

Once the cameras were done rolling, I thanked him once again and I went down into the locker room. Troy was sitting down talking to Zach as I walked over to him. He looked up at me and Zach glanced at me. "I'll be back," Zach said, Troy sighed as he turned around and I rubbed my forehead, "I'm glad to see you," I said aloud, "I figured I should come talk to the coaches and talk with our trainer." I just nodded my head, "Well…"

He sighed turning around to look at me, "I'm sorry okay? I just…I don't really care to talk about anything."

"Okay," I answered, "Okay," I turned around to move away from him but he sighed and reached back around, his wrist gripping mine. "Brie," I turned around to face him as my emotions caught up with me. I looked at the tiles on the ceiling trying to keep any tears that wanted out away. I sucked in a breath trying to not let my emotions out, Troy eased me down into his lap gently, his good hand wrapping around my waist.

"I'm sorry okay, I don't know what I am feeling right now. I just can't explain it." I just nodded my head because if a word escaped my mouth I would most likely dissolve into tears. "I need to go, I have more interviews to do." I tried to get off his lap, "We don't walk away during fights," he whispered into my ear, "We aren't fighting Troy," I pushed his hand away and he sat back in disbelief. "Brie,"

"You can't just accept me to understand what you are trying to tell me Troy, for some reason, if I tell you that you get pissed off at me and demand my feelings. When it is you though, I have no right to know what is at least going through your head. I am not privileged enough." Anger tore through my voice and I turned away as I was now anger and the tears started to flow. I moved out of the clubhouse before many could turn my direction.

"Whoa girl," I turned around to see Ellie and Emerson; I totally forgot they were coming today. I covered my mouth and she put Emerson down and then pulled me into her arms. "What's wrong sweetie?" her warm arms accepted me into her embrace and I choked back threatening sobs.

"What's wrong?"

"I don't have enough time to tell you everything," I said as I pulled away, my fingers beginning to wipe underneath my eyes. "Can we go out for drinks tonight and then we can talk?" Ellie nodded her head sympathetic, "Aunt G!" I forced a smile as I leaned over to pick up Emerson, "How is my sweet girl?" she giggled and I kissed her forehead, "Troy," I turned my head to see Josh kind of standing in front of him.

Ellie shared a look with me and I shrugged my shoulders, "How is he?"

"That would be about the tears," I answered, "I have to go do another interview and get my make-up fixed. You have a key to the apartment?"

"Yes, but isn't your dad there?"

"Maybe? He talked about taking Logan out to the park or something."

"Okay, well, I will see you when your day is over."

"Thank you,"

Ellie and Emerson moved on and I heard Josh talking to Troy, "Just give her some space man,"

I strode past those two as I went back to the field, Erica noticed me and she frowned, "Can I have a retouch, please?" she just nodded as I settled into the chair and she touched up my make-up. "You only have one more for today and that is with Zach," I just nodded my head and she turned to go retrieve the man. He had changed into a pair of jeans with his jersey. He smiled at me and he gave me a questioning look.

We both took a seat and he was mu7iked up ready to go. The cameras started to roll and I cleared my throat gently, "Welcome back to the pre-season report, and we now have Zach Edgner one of our relief pitchers, welcome Zach,"

"Thanks for having me," he answered, his eyes flashed to mine as I tried to fake how happy I was, I tried to force the interview and Zach went along with everything I asked. We stopped twice trying to fix my problem because I couldn't let my personal life effect my work life.

"What are your thoughts on starting pitcher Troy Bolton going down to Tommy John surgery?" Zach blew out a breath of air, "It is really sad, and upsetting for our team obviously. Troy is a workhorse, he eats up innings and he gets the wins. He goes out every game and he deals. The man has been pitching since he was ten though; it's a lot for him to take, as he is getting ready to turn thirty this summer. As a team, we are going to rally and win for him. I know the pitchers are anxious to replace his innings and as a bullpen we are ready to step up and help as needed. I have nothing but respect for Troy and I hope that his recovery goes well so that next season he can dominate all over again."

I nodded my head, I continued to ask him more questions and when the interview was over, I took my mike off as I was done for the day and Zach took his off slowly, handing it over to the crew as I put my notes away. "Gabs,"

My eyes veered up at him, "You alright?"

"Yea," I nodded, "I'm fine." My words were clipped and I started to move for the dugout, "I know Troy upset you earlier, he is upset that he upset you."

"I guess he shouldn't be so contradicting." I mumbled, "I have to go. My dad is flying home tonight." I went to grab my stuff and Zach let it go. I put my bag over my shoulder and I walked into the clubhouse. Troy had disappeared so I took the opportunity to just leave, I pulled my keys out and I got into my car as my phone started to ring. I answered it, "Hello?"

"Gabs,"

"Mom?"

"Your dad said you and Troy were having some issues,"

"We're fine," I bit, my mom only sighed, "How is Logan?"

"Logan,"

"Since her surgery?"

"Perfectly healthy,"

"Why are you being so short?"

"I'm stressed out mom. My husband is closing me out, my daughter is being carefree, I am piled in work, and I am tired as hell." My mom sighed, "You have thrown yourself into work since your miscarriage,"

"Can we just not even talk about that?"

"I'm sorry,"

"I just…I don't want to talk about any of it."

"Well…if you need to talk,"

"Thanks mom,"

"When is the first game?"

"The 1st, mom, I am not in the mood for small talk. I'm really sorry, I need to go,"

"Okay, I love you,"

The words that made me slow down just a little bit, "I love you too mom,"

I lay in the bed after an evening with Ellie and a bottle of wine, Troy twisted onto his side, "What happened to our pact?"

"I didn't know we were fighting,"

"Like hell Gabi, you jut don't walk away in tears,"

"I had to get back to work,"

Twisting onto my side away from him caused him to sigh, "I'm sorry, I'm being a pain in the ass,"

"Yup, you are."

"I'm sorry okay? I don't know what to do,"

"Talk to me," I sat up in anger, "That's all you ask from me right? You just want me to talk to you? Well I am talking to you; it hasn't even been a fucking month since I lost our third baby. It hasn't been a month since I lost another perfect baby that we made together. My daughter just had surgery because her body failed her, my husband had a major surgery and is just shutting me out of my life and where does that leave me Troy? I'm reeling in from a heartbreaking loss and I am trying to dig myself out of a hole but trying to dig myself out is so hard when I am trying to talk to you and you stop listening. I am drowning Troy, I am drowning,"

I had a mad rush of tears as I got out of the bed, "Brie," I heard him move as I braced myself against the wall as his hand slid behind me and I wigged out, "I need space Troy, I can't breathe right now." I took a step away from him and he reached out again, "Please, stop," I turn to face the sad expression in his eyes, "If you aren't going to talk to me then why should I talk to you?" I whispered back, I moved out of the bedroom, "This is walking away from a fight," he replied, I hiccupped, "When is the last time we followed that rule Troy?"

His eyes darkened, "I don't know, I think you probably remember,"

"Are you still pissed at me for fucking leaving?"

"I'm not thrilled with you over it."

"I thought we got over that,"

"Isn't that you walking away from a fight?"

"What were we fighting about Troy? Huh?"

Troy turned his head away from me and I heard Logan's door opened, "Momma?" I tilted my head back as I wiped my tears away, "What's up sweet girl?"

"I heard somebody yelling," I walked into the living room and I met her, I eased her into my grasp while I kissed her forehead. "Don't worry about it sweet girl," she looked over my shoulder to see Troy standing there, "Brie,"

"I have it," my voice made the argument clear that it was over, that I wasn't dealing with it further tonight. I walked into Logan's room and I laid her back down as I then climbed into the bed next to her. "Can mommy cuddle with you?" she nodded her head, "I like when you cuddle with me, is daddy mad at you?"

I kissed her forehead, "No," I answered, "Are you mad at daddy?" I closed my eyes tightly, "No," I answered again, my voice pained as I rubbed her back as she started to fall back asleep. I looked up at the ceiling, just praying, that this wasn't the new normal.

Friday, March 15th, 2024

Gabi's POV

"Lolo, eat your breakfast." I said, my voice monotone as the past week had been hell. Troy and I could barely say five words to each other since our argument on Monday. I don't even know what we were angry about any longer but nothing nice was to be said between the two of us. I was thankful for Ellie and Mallory being around to give me a saving grace while Troy stumbled through recovery.

Troy came out of the bedroom as he was flying back to Kansas City tomorrow night to see the doctors Monday morning. His eyes found mine but then quickly redirected to Logan. He kissed the top of her head as I poured myself a bowl of cereal turning it around in a circle with the milk as I stirred the flavor in. I felt my eyes sting, as I knew Troy was watching but I couldn't look at him. Logan started to say something about her day yesterday.

Finally, Troy moved and started to make his own breakfast as I let out a gush of air and seated myself next to Logan at the bar. "I leave tomorrow night,"

"Okay," I replied, normal interaction for Logan to see that everything was okay. "I might get my splint off,"

"That's nice," I replied, my eyes only staring into my bowl. "Daddy," the sweet relief of Logan's voice from the pained conversation and I took the opportunity to let her just chat away. Once I was finished with my food, I cleaned my bowl and did the dishes while I put away the food. "Mommy," I looked at Logan, "Yes?"

"Why are you sad?" I flickered my eyes over to Troy and then back to Logan, "I'm not sad." I answered, "Hurry up and finish, mommy has to be at the park for the game today."

"Is daddy pitching?" my eyes flickered over to Troy to see the pained reaction on his face. My lips fell in a frown, as we hadn't really explained to Logan that Troy was done for the year. "Lo," Troy voiced, the pained expression gone from his face. "Daddy can't pitch this season," he said carefully, "I have a surgery that prevents me from throwing a baseball for a while," big tears welled in her eyes, "I want daddy to play baseball,"

Troy took a deep breath as he was trying to control his emotions, "I want to play baseball too but I will take the year off. Maybe you and I can watch some of the games together with Alyssa."

"I want you to play daddy,"

Troy looked down and just nodded his head, "I wish baby girl but next year," the room grew silent as nobody had anything left to say.

"Lolo!" I glanced up to see Jack standing in the doorway, Troy let a smile cross his features seeing his dad and Logan screeched running over to him. "Grandpa!"

"How is my sweet girl?" he picked her up and kissed her, Jack then looked over at me and then at Troy. I knew he felt the tension surrounding us but Troy seemed to lighten it as he spoke.

"Hey Dad, what are you doing here?"

Troy hugged his dad and Logan giggled in Jack's arms, "Hi Jack," I said quietly, I moved off the bar as I finished putting everything away. "Lolo, how about you go get your shoes on. I thought about taking you to the park today to watch the game."

She squealed and went running to her room; once she was out of ear shot Jack narrowed his eyes at us. "Are you two okay?"

"Fine," we both said together, no eye contact being made between the two of us. Jack frowned, "Troy, how is the elbow?"

"Shit," he muttered, he then walked to our room, "I need to go get ready."

Jack watched him walk away and his eyes met mine, "Gabi," I looked down at my feet and then up at Jack, "We're fine,"

"You guys don't look happy or fine,"

"I guess you should talk to him about that,"

Troy's POV

Logan ran ahead of my dad and I as we were taking a walk after the Royals won their spring game. "What's going on?" my dad asked, he had enough watching Gabi and I dance around each other trying to avoid each other.

"Nothing," I stressed, "Nothing? You two have barely touched each other let alone look at each other. You guys never stop doing either of these things."

Biting the inside of my cheek, I watched Logan pick up a rock and then throw it to chase it down and pick another one up. She repeated the actions and I shrugged my shoulders finally, "I don't know Dad,"

"It wasn't an I don't know answer Troy, what is wrong?"

"She is mad at me for how I am handling my Tommy John surgery," I confessed, "I have no idea why she is so angry about it. I don't want to talk about it."

"Is that fair to her?"

I groaned, "Dad, I don't need you taking sides. I don't even need you involved,"

"Well," I tilted my head back and then I looked forward as Logan crashed and burned on the pavement. She started to cry so I sped up; once I reached her I noticed the bloody knee from her tumble.

I bent over to pick her up with my one healthy arm and I cradled her closer to me, "Shh…" I calmed her down as my dad looked at her; Logan relaxed in my arms as we turned around back towards the apartments. "Troy, I know things for you guys have been rocky since the miscarriage," I closed my eyes trying to control the anger stirring inside my chest, "Dad, if we could really NOT talk about that it would be great,"

"Is this the issue?"

I didn't answer as the apartment came back into sight, "I'm not talking about it,"

"Maybe that's the issue, you not wanting to talk about any of it."

I moved past my dad as we entered the apartment and up the stairs to our floor. I opened the door as Gabi was asleep on the couch and I couldn't help but my eyes fall to her. The pace of her breaths coming out, as Logan wanted down, she ran over to Gabi and buried her face into her stomach.

She woke up with a start but relaxed when she noticed Logan, her hand reaching to rub the back of her head, her eyes falling shut again. "I hurt my knee," she whimpered into her stomach, Gabi hoisted herself up as she gently examined her knee, Gabi kissed it and Logan crawled onto her chest and Gabi rubbed her back, "How can you be mad at her Troy?"

Gabi smiled as she held Logan closer to her, Gabi's eyes falling back asleep, "I'm going back to my hotel now but maybe both of you need to figure it out. I'm not saying it just you or just her but it's a rough patch,"

I only nodded my head, my eyes to heavy to take away from Gabi and Logan. He slipped out the door and I picked up the dirty dishes from pizza earlier. I washed them and put them away one by one and when I was done I shut the light off and went into the living room.

I bent over and kissed the top of Logan's head, Gabi stiffened and I felt bad. "Do you want me to put her in bed?" my tone soft, I didn't want to fight tonight. The week was bad enough; I didn't have the energy for it tonight.

"I can put her in bed," she said, "I don't want you to overdo it or anything," the bite in her remark stung but I let it go. She got up with Logan and took her to her bedroom, I walked into ours as I changed into a pair of shorts and got into our bed.

She came in moments later, "Brie,"

"I'm not in the mood for arguing," her voice was so clipped and short, I frowned, "I didn't want to argue."

"So you wanted to talk? And that talk would go so well and turn into an argument and I just don't have it in me tonight." She pulled on a tank top with a pair of shorts, her bra coming loose and she then pulled it away putting it on the dresser.

"No, I just…I wanted to talk with you."

"Well I don't want to talk, I am all talked out."

She went to her side of the bed and buried herself deep into the pillows. The blankets wrapping around her shoulder and I shut my lap off and she shut hers off as if we were in a movie together. The room fell silent as I eased my arm around her waist to pull her back to me.

"Troy,"

"Shh, if you don't want to talk fine but I miss you, nothing changes that." She didn't protest but she also didn't relax.

Wednesday, March 20th, 2024

Gabi's POV

"How is Troy?" my eyes looked up at Joel and I shrugged, "I don't know, we haven't talked much lately." I wrote something in my email I was trying to send and Joel sat down in front of me.

"He is in Kansas City, right?"

"Yes," I answered, I looked back up at him, "Can I help you?"

"It's unlike for you two not to talk,"

"We just don't have a lot of nice things to say to each other."

"He did just blow his arm out for the season,"

"And it's sad and upsetting, that doesn't mean he gets to be a dick about it." Joel only nodded his head and I looked back to my email. "Momma!" Logan ran into the room with Alyssa behind her.

"What's up baby girl?"

She waved to Joel, "Alyssa and I found this big rock!"

"You did?"

"Yes!"

I kissed her forehead, "How about you and Alyssa go get some ice cream?" she squirmed out of my lap and was out of the room in seconds. "So does Logan notice the tension between you two?"

"No, we are civil when she is around."

"I don't get it,"

"I don't get it either Joel,"

"I can do your interview with him," I glanced up, "What interview?" I asked, Joel sighed, "and when he comes back Fox wants an interview to be with him about how he is doing."

"And they want me to do it?"

"Yes…"

I cleared my throat, "I can do it." I told him, "You sure?"

"Positive."

Joel patted my back and then walked away, I pressed my lips together and I then felt my knees buckle as I sat down on the seat. I inhaled and then exhaled as I tried to think back to why things had gotten so different. How they started to spin in a black circle to the impending brokenness.

Troy's POV

I walked into Swings after a long day filled with doctors and PT's as they finally took off my splint and my arm was a free man…I just couldn't do anything crazy…like throw a baseball.

"Troy," I looked up to see Lance and I nodded my head, "Hi," I echoed, "How are you?" I twisted my arm so he could see the grueling scar that designed my elbow now. "How do you think? I'm not even allowed to pick up a baseball."

Lance sighed, "I'm sorry man," I shrugged as I fell into his couch, "Gabi and I are fighting as well so that's a thrill. My life is just damn peachy."

"Ouch, you and Gabi fighting?"

I nodded, "Weeks worth," I answered, this time Lance really looked at me. "You two barely go a day without making up, what's up?"

"You know about her third miscarriage right?"

Lance frowned, "No, I didn't. I'm sorry man," I shrugged my shoulders, "It was the breaking point."

"The breaking point?" Lance seemed confused, "What?"

"Well the Tommy John surgery didn't go over so well between us either,"

"She is mad at you for that?"

"I'm mad at myself," I corrected, "She is just…" I let the sentence drift away and Lance sighed, "Troy,"

"Lance, I don't know, I just…" I breathed out, "I have played baseball since I was ten years old. I don't know what I am going to do with the next several months."

"Rehab,"

"And?"

"Be with your wife and child," I rolled my eyes, "She still has her high up career," I mumbled, "Logan will be so happy to have you around more,"

"Oh fantastic,"

"What is wrong with you?" my eyes avoided Lances as the high school team came through the doors. I rubbed my face gently and Lance sighed, "I know that this sucks but it's not like your career is over Troy, you have another good six to seven years left after your TJ surgery."

"You know what, I came here looking for support and you fucking sound like Gabi," Lance looked at me surprised but I didn't stay much longer, I stormed past the high school boys that I trained all winter with Lance and Gary.

They gave me questioning looks and stares at my elbow as I walked through the door for only Cody to be on the outside of the door. "Jesus," I grumbled, "Yea, are you avoiding me?"

"No," I answered, "Why aren't you at work?" I asked, "Spring break," he replied, "Why are you being an asshole to everybody?"

"My season is over," my voice was flat, "I don't have much to say to anybody."

"Oh? You seem to have a lot to say to Gabi,"

"Why are you defending her?"

"Because you are being a dick to her."

"I am not. She should toughen up," I mumbled, Cody laughed, "Are you for real? The woman who let you play major league baseball and followed you around the country, the one who lost her best friend in college, the one who has had three miscarriages, the one who almost lost her baby at birth? You mean that woman?"

My nostrils flared at Cody, "You mean the one who broke up with me after I signed a contract, shut me out when things go hard, ran away when it was too much? You mean that one?"

"And you are any better?"

I shook my head, "I am tired Cody,"

"I know you are upset Troy but you should really just listen to her for five minutes. Don't you think out of everybody she understands losing everything she wants? Don't you think she has been put through it enough to know what you are feeling?"

My eyes locked with the ground as I kicked a rock away from me, "I am so sick of everybody getting on to me, I just need time alone,"
I moved past Cody and he didn't stop me as he ran his hands through his thinning hair. I moved to my car and I unlocked it, tired, and exhausted.

Friday, March 22nd, 2024

Gabi's POV

Troy had arrived some time this morning but I had yet to actually see him. We had our interview together this afternoon before the game and I wasn't sure how it was going to go over.

"Momma! Momma!" I turned around and Logan had her arms wrapped around Troy's neck. I smiled that Logan had Troy back and I also smiled at the lack of brace on Troy's elbow.

"Hey," I said softly, his eyes were stiff along with his body. There was no mistaking the tension between us. "Hi," his words were forced out of his mouth and I sighed, "Lolo, what did you do with Alyssa?"

She shrugged her shoulders and I smiled, "I'm right here!"

I smiled, "Alyssa, do you mind taking her? I need to speak to Troy,"

She nodded and Logan left Troy's grasp as Troy went to his locker. I frowned deeply as I turned around, "I said I wanted to talk to you."

"Oh,"

He turned around to face me and I looked at him, I then looked at the ceiling. "How was the house?"

"Standing."

"Swings?"

"Good,"

"Your family?"

"Always a joy to visit with."

I groaned, "You know what Troy, I just need an honest answer from you for one minute. I am trying to be nice."

"Seems like it's a forced activity."

"Do you know we have an interview together this afternoon so if we could act like we actually like each other for five damn minutes it would be nice of you." His frown never left his lips. "Joel always does my interview,"

"He isn't this year."

"Was that your doing?"

"No, it wasn't my doing Troy,"

He rolled his eyes and turned away from me, "Whatever,"

"Can I even ask how are you doing or are you going to bite my head off?"

"I'm fine Gabi,"

I gave up after that as I went to the field to prepare for the interview. I sat down and went over my notes casually, they touched up my face, and then Troy appeared with the jersey and jeans on. I looked at him and he looked at me, his eyes cold as stone.

Troy took the seat to my right and they put his microphone on.

"You guys ready?" I hesitated a look over to Troy and Troy smiled warmly at them, "Yea,"

They counted down and my stomach twisted into nerves, I had no idea how this was going to go and it concerned me. "And go…"

"Welcome back to Royal's pre-season rundown, and with me now is veteran pitcher Troy Bolton, welcome,"

"Thanks for having me," my eyes snapped to his as his voice was warm and beautiful and the Troy I knew. His eyes melted away all stone and the warm blue was inviting. "How are you doing Troy," the words were genuine and I really wanted to know how he was doing. I needed to know.

"Since the Tommy John surgery, I have been trying to figure out how this next year will play out. It's different Y'know? I have been playing baseball since I was 3 and pitching since I was ten. It's something that I have always done; I will be working hard this season to be ready for next season. I know I have a great support system and will be back on the mound in no time,"

I couldn't resist a small smile as I nodded, "Good good, what do you think about this coming team?"

"They are strong and developed. They are going to claw and fight there way through this season and earn respect from the national media. I may not be able to be on the mound but I will be in the clubhouse to help the young pitchers develop further. This team is still my life and I will be there for them," I nodded my head gently, "Since it seems everybody knows that we are married," my eyes flickered to my notes that were written for me. I frowned and Troy's smile faltered but he recovered.

"What's it like working with your wife?"

A question that Troy and I both had been asked on multiple occasions. "It's fantastic." He answered, his eyes still full of that promise. "Getting to spend everyday with the woman I love." The words seemed bitter but I didn't know if I was just hearing them that way or if he truly was bitter. "Do you think Logan likes to travel?" a big smile spread over Troy's lips, a smile that I knew was real and full of love which made me sad that I didn't get that look.

"Logan loves it. She loves to be with the boys and run around, you should interview her one day." I laughed and smiled, "That would be a good idea,"

"I mean, she may sing some silly song."

"Her songs are cute,"

Troy and I looked into each other's eyes, a hesitation between the two of us. "Thank you," my words seemed lighter and easier, maybe thanking him for more than just doing this interview with me. Thanking him for not being angry for five minutes with me.

"You're welcome,"

Then the cameras stopped. Troy's eyes went back to the stone and I shrank back in my seat, "Troy,"

He sighed and ran his fingers over his face, "What?"

I choked back the lump in my throat, as I smiled sadly, "Nothing."

"We can talk at home after the game,"

I nodded my head gently and he walked back down into the dugout and I sighed, I tilted my head back praying that tonight wouldn't involve screaming. It was a lot of wishful thinking because whatever happened during the interview was the Troy that was locked away from me. Troy didn't want me to see that person and that made me upset, that he didn't trust me enough. I sighed and I looked at the crew doing other things, as I needed to get ready for our first broadcast.

I guess we shall see tonight.

I poured myself a glass of wine and drank it slowly. Troy was putting Logan to bed and I wasn't sure what was to come. We didn't speak at all the rest of the day unless it concerned Logan. I heard her bedroom door shut and I gripped the sink. Troy came over to the fridge to pull out a beer, "I don't know why you are this way," my voice was angry with him, "I don't understand why you are mad at me."

Troy took a long drink of his beer, "I don't understand why you just wont leave me alone to deal with it." I frowned, "Next time I have a problem, I would love for you to remember that."

Troy scrawled and he walked to the living room, "What happened about talking tonight?"

"I don't know you seem more into yelling tonight."

"You seem like a dick tonight."

"I'm a dick?" I looked at him, my arms crossed over my chest and I nodded my head, "That's what I said." Troy grunted and then plopped in front of the TV, "Whatever."

"You are just going to whatever me? Are you serious?" Troy shut the TV off, right after he turned it on. He put his hands over his face as he breathed, his back moving, "I don't know what you want me to say to you Gabi, I don't know what magical words will make this all better!"

I laughed, I tilted my head backwards and I took another drink of my wine. I just might need something stronger. "You think a word is going to fix this? I know that we are teaching Logan right now that please and thank you are the words to get what you want but there is no word here Troy, there are actions. Your actions are telling me you don't care about Logan and I."

His head spun around, "I don't care about you guys? I don't CARE about you guys?" that one hit the nerve as he got up, "This could blow my career Gabi! This could be the end and what do we have after that? I don't have an education in anything besides baseball. Baseball is my education. It is how I make a living. What are we going to do after that?"

Easing back gently, I looked at him, "What are you talking about Troy? I have a job,"

"It is my job to make this family comfortable," he was stressing out and I finally just let out a long laugh, "Troy, I don't, I don't understand." He frowned, "This is why talking isn't doing us any good because you don't understand."

"I don't understand because if I pulled this shit you would be fucking pissed off."

He sighed, "I know I would be,"

"Then why can't I be pissed off?"

"You can!"

Dazed over the argument we both stared at each other until his hand wrapped around the back of my neck, my lips pressed with his and we were frantic due to the lack of touching in the past couple of weeks but his hands slipped down my waist and I moved back into our bedroom, my breath harder to catch with every movement.

This wasn't the answer but…we weren't yelling anymore.

Sunday, March 24th, 2024

"You just had sex?"

"And haven't spoke much since. Not a lot of smiles. Not a lot of laughing. Not a lot of anything."

"You guys are…"

"In a downward spiral," I answered, "I don't know what to do because when we talk we yell. When we yell we just get angry with each other."

"Or horny," Mallory answered, I sighed, "Mal," I shifted the phone to my other shoulder as I dragged my foot in the dirt. "I'm sorry, okay? I just…I don't know. I don't know why you guys are acting like this."

"I don't know why he is acting like this,"

"You are playing a part too Gabi,"

"I know, I am but I am frustrated by him."

"You guys have never fought like this,"

"I wish that we weren't, I miss my Troy,"

"I know you do girl, it's just a rough patch."

"We don't do rough patches."

"Well…now you do."

Oh goodness. Well…what is the thoughts?

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