Disclaimer: I don't own Escaflowne, its characters, or any flashbacks used from the series in this story. I also don't own "Kissing You" by Des'ree.

A/N: Yep, I'm not dead! I know that a lot of people are mad at me and confused over the sparse updates and such, but to be honest, I started this fic when I was a lot more into this series. I still love it, but not with the same fervor I had at an earlier age. I wish that I did because it would make it a lot easier to finish. This is my last Esca fic since I probably won't continue my other two. It's kind of sad because I really loved this series for the better part of two years. I'm still quite fond of it. It's going to be hard saying goodbye to you all, but I'm not quite there yet, so no need for it! Anyway, let's begin with the twelfth chapter. Oh, and for "Kissing You," this chapter's song, if you possibly can, play it. The lyrics aren't really that great, but the song is so beautiful I just want to cry… It's off of the "Romeo + Juliet" soundtrack. It's an amazing song.

Cey- Oh wow… This is a long review! But I'm lovin' it! (Oh God, McDonald's haunts me…) I like how logical you are in defending your opinions. You don't just tell me what you think should happen; you tell me why it should happen. I like that! I can see why you want V/H to be together, and being a long-time V/H fanatic, I share your feelings about the matter. This fic is a little different though. I've actually changed my mind over who she ends up with multiple times. I think that I know how I'm ending it now, but you never know… You'll have to wait and find out. Hitomi is insanely optimistic. But she's quite angsty at times with all that knee hugging and such. I think that I am going to put some closure on the Y/A issue somewhere in the next few chapters. I didn't really follow your advice to update soon… Sorry!

Inda- Thanks! V/H do make an insanely adorable couple. (They're both so awkward!) And you're right… Things can and will change.

Julesangel04- I'm so happy that you like it! I'd honestly just stop writing it if everyone hated it… I didn't continue soon, but I did continue! Thanks again!

Draco MalfoyGirl 16- Van is a baby. He's endearing, yet very whiny at times. (You've seen the series, you know…) I think that it's because he was pushed through his childhood so quickly. He sometimes seems to respond to things a bit childishly. That's how I portray him anyway. I don't think that he's a weakling, just a little sensitive. He hasn't seen his soulmate in two years though, you must admit, one does have reason to whine. Yay! A F/H fan! (The V/H fans are overwhelming for this story, which actually surprises me.) There is a lot of F/H in this chapter so you'll hopefully like it! Thanks for reading!

Dragonsdaughter1- Thank you so much. Your review really made me happy. I know that it sounds stupid, but I felt a lot better after reading it. Ha, another F/H fan!

Seabreeze- I'm glad you like the story and the music. I'm a music freak, so I can't help but add it in. I just hope won't freeze me. I put it at the top and I acknowledge the band or singer so I figure that it's okay. I just put it up there really to suggest something for people to listen to while reading, to set the mood, you know? You have a very definite opinion on this, don't you? I love it!

Dumb Idiot- This probably wasn't supposed to make me laugh, but it did. It sounds like one of my friends… I'm glad that you like the fic. I'm sorry that it took me so long to update. Life has been quite hectic lately. I hate when writers don't work on their fics for a really long time and I'm sorry that I've become one of those writers. Thanks for reading!

Darkangl28- It's really weird… Three different people all of a sudden came upon my fic within a span of two days after I hadn't updated in a year… I'm glad that you guys discovered it though. This is my favorite fic that I've worked on. I'm glad that I'm keeping you on the edge of your seat! Just don't fall off, because the twists just keep on coming!

Mizery Rizes- I'm sorry that it makes you sad. Personally, I seem to be drawn to depressing stories. That's probably because I am weird. Gone With the Wind is one of my favorite movies, to show you how much I love tragic stories. Poor Scarlett.

Wakaba- Well, I don't believe that I've ever been yipped at before. Don't you hate it when there are no more chapters? I do, too. Here is the long-awaited chapter 12! I hope that it was worth the wait!

Laloner- Getting this review fourteen months after I last updated made me feel like I really did need to actually begin to finish my story, so thank you. I'm so glad that you like the fic. And I finally did update, so I can dance and sing and frolic and so can you… Yay!

Tears of the Heart

Chapter 12: Realization

Pride can stand a thousand trials,
The strong will never fall
But watching stars without you,
My soul cried

Heaving heart is full of pain,
Oh, oh, the aching
'Cause I'm kissing you, oh,
I'm kissing you, oh

Touch me deep, pure and true,
Gift to me forever
'Cause I'm kissing you, oh,
I'm kissing you, oh

Where are you now?
Where are you now?

'Cause I'm, oh I'm kissing you,
I'm kissing you, oh, ohhhh!

-"Kissing You" by Des'ree

The lonesome king stared out of his window solemnly, scrutinizing the lands in the distance. His lands. The lands that he had sworn to protect when he was crowned king so many years ago. He was only eighteen, but he felt decades past it. All he could see was her face. And those eyes. The eyes that had bewitched him since the first time he'd seen her. There was just something about them. If he didn't know and love her so well, he would swear that she was a sorceress. No one had ever been able to control him so easily, to sway his judgment without difficulty. He guessed that someone had to come along. He was just unfortunate, or fortunate depending on how you looked at it, that that someone had been her.

Being so close, yet so far away at the same time was unbearable. And the thought that his brother was the one who had taken her from him was what tortured him most of all. The idea of him touching her, kissing her, being with her- utterly sickened him. He was through waiting around for love to find him. For happiness to knock upon his door. For his dreams to take hold. If life in this dark, barren world had taught him anything, it was one lesson. If you wanted something, you had to reach out and grab it; screw the consequences. He was using this lesson. She wouldn't get away from him again.

"It is time for the final battle. Folken will not escape unscathed this time. He'll have to answer to me. And I'll finally get back what's rightfully mine…" Van Fanel whispered, licking his lips. He whispered hoarsely, "The generals! I must find my generals. If I intend to go to war with the planet, they probably have the right to know…"

"Mother…?" She looked down at her young son as he tugged on her skirt.

"What is it, Sweetheart?" she asked softly, leaning forward and scooping him up in her arms.

"Mother, why is Father crying?" the small boy asked innocently.

She felt herself visibly stiffen as her throat tightened. She bit her tongue to try to hold back the tears she felt coming, nearly biting it off in the process. How could she tell him…?

"Well, Baby… Father's sad because someone very dear to him left…" she replied delicately.

"Who was it?"

"Your Papa's brother. The only one he had. He cared for him very much."

"Where'd he leave to? Did he go to the Mystic Moon like you, Mother? Did he travel through the sky?" he asked excitedly, eyes lighting up with excitement.

"No, Honey… He went somewhere very different. He went to be with your Grandmother in heaven."

"But why'd he leave? Father looks so sad…"

"Sometimes, we can't help but hurt the ones we love… It's just life I guess…"

"I don't want Father to be sad, Mother…" he whispered, gripping at her collar, pressing his face into her chest.

"Neither do I, Love, neither do I…" she murmured softly.

"A child! A son. My son…" Hitomi gasped, eyes widening. "It's odd. When I was younger, I always saw myself growing up and never getting married. I never thought that any boy would want to be with me. It's kind of funny that ever since I came to Gaea, I've had boys literally fighting over me. But that vision couldn't have lied. I have a son. Well, I'll have a son." Her cheeks flushed. "But whose son is it?" she whispered. She hadn't gotten a good look at the boy. And even if she had, it probably wouldn't have done her a lot of good since the two men who wanted to be with her were brothers with the same genes. "And one of them… One of them is going to die… Oh God, no… I can't bear it again. I don't want to see the people who I love die. I'm tired of being hurt, God. Please stop it. Stop it right now." A stream of tears descended down her pale cheeks as she smashed her face against her pillow, trying to numb the overwhelming pain and nausea creeping up within her. She stood up, walking out onto the balcony overlooking the sea. The endless, engulfing sea made up of all hues of blue and green.

"What has got your goat?" Oban appeared out of nowhere, sitting on her bed.

Hitomi shrieked, leaping in the air and nearly falling off of her balcony

"I'm not that ugly, am I?" Oban scratched her head, grinning coyly.

"Oban… Do you get some kind of sick thrill from nearly killing me?"

"It's a fetish I suppose." She grinned wickedly. "But seriously, what's wrong? I could hear you on the other side of the fortress."

"Oban… Folken and Van are in danger. One of them is going to die. I don't know what to do. I know that it's my fault. It's always my fault." she whispered. "Everyone who I've ever cared about have suffered because of me."

"Will you shut up already? You can't blame yourself for every bad thing that has ever happened. It's just not logical. You may be unaware of this, but I too, have the gift of sight."

"What…?"

"But unlike you, I can control it. I can see your future right now."

"Oban … What do you see? What will happen to me?"

"You'll live, Hitomi. You'll live and die like every other person. You'll have children. Your children will have children. You'll be happy."

"But who with, Oban? Who will I be happy with?"

"That part of my vision is clouded."

"But why? It was unclear in my vision as well."

"Because even the future doesn't know yet. It's up to you to decide, Hitomi. You have a choice to make. Everything depends on which choice you decide on."

"But I don't want to make a choice. I care for both of them. I don't want to hurt anyone."

"It's far too late for that. It's a simple question with a simple answer. Who do you want? Folken or Van?"

"I want both."

"You can't have both."

"Why not?"

"It's not complicated. It's no different here than on the Mystic Moon. One husband and one wife. And don't try the whole polygamy thing on me. No one sane has that problem."

"Why can't we all just live together peacefully?"

"Oh yeah, that would work out fine. 'Good morning, Hitomi. I'm going to kill you, Folken!' and 'Good morning to you too, you useless infidel.'"

"I just mean… Aw… I don't know what I mean."

"Often, it seems that when people say that they don't what they mean, they know exactly what they mean…" The old, haggard woman whispered with a rasp.

"You make NO SENSE!" She screeched, taking the woman by the shoulders and shaking her.

"I'm old. I have an excuse. You do not." she muttered as Hitomi set her down with a sigh. "Look at me, Hitomi. I'm aged. I'm decrepit. I'm losing all traces of my sanity… When I die, it will be a blessing. However, the idea of you squabbling infants stabbing each other over such a trivial thing as romance is sickening. Why not go fetch your gun, get the hound dogs, and run to the ol' swimmin' hole while you're at it?" Hitomi stared at her, obviously understanding the insults being fired at her. "I just think that it's ridiculous for you to break an entire family apart. It'd be better if you'd never come at all."

Hitomi stared at her.

"Do you really mean that?" she asked in disbelief.

"Of course I do. You've dashed all hopes of reconciliation between those two idiots. The hopes were pretty damn small, but you squashed them like bugs beneath your heel."

"Folken killed our friends…" Hitomi whispered bitterly, her voice shaking.

"You say that, but has your husband ever mentioned doing such a thing…?"

"Well no, but…"

"Then how do you know?"

Flashback

"I am Makai, a sorcerer of Zaibach. You were brought here using the destiny prognostication engine, which Lord Folken rescued from the Vione…"

"Where is Folken? I thought that he was helping the Allies…"

"A clever ploy to gain their trust, then strike. We killed them all…"

"F-Folken is a traitor?" Hitomi stuttered in disbelief.

End of Flashback

"Makai said so…"

"Pshaw… He's a sorcerer… How often have they been known to tell the damn truth?"

Hitomi stared straight ahead in complete and udder shock, her face paling considerably. This couldn't be happening. She must have been dreaming.

Flashback

"I want you to trust me." Folken said softly.

End of Flashback

Trust me.

Trust me.

Trust me…

"I want to trust him-" she murmured. "I want to trust him with all of my heart. But I can't. He killed them."

Flashback

"Aren't you afraid of me? I'm the one who sent the Intensified Luck Soldiers after you." Folken said stoically.

"I can't explain it… But…"

"But…?" Folken asked.

"If I were afraid, you wouldn't be comfortable. It wouldn't work. If you don't trust people, they don't trust you…" she said wisely.

"You know my stay here could just be part of my plot…" Folken warned her.

"All the same, I still wouldn't think you were a bad person, Folken. Even if my trust was misplaced." Hitomi smiled at him.

"So that's your power…" he murmured as Van looked on with an angry expression from nearby.

End of Flashback

Flashback

"How could you join Zaibach? How could you abandon your country and plot to kill your own brother? How could you burn the kingdom you were meant to rule to the ground? What happened to Folken Lacoeur de Fanel?"

"Have you ever looked at my face, Hitomi?" He turned on the desk lamp to illuminate the right side of his face where she could plainly see the purple teardrop tattooed on his cheek. "When I joined Zaibach, I abandoned my past life and started anew. Folken Lacoeur de Fanel died when the dragon bit off his arm. That was the day that Folken Strategos, strategist of Zaibach, was born. I sacrificed my family, my people, my friends, and my birthright, all for the sake of a new world. I asked Dornkirk for this tattoo. I changed how I did my hair, donned sorcerers' robes, had my ears pierced, received my metal appendage, and the tattoos around my eyes also seemed appropriate. I swore from that day forward that I would never cry again. I have only broken that promise once, when I was responsible for the deaths of Naria and Eriya. This tattoo represents all the miseries of my life and the tears that were never and will never be shed. I was given a new life, and with it, I became a different person. Folken Lacoeur de Fanel is dead, Hitomi."

End of Flashback

"He didn't do it!" she whispered in amazement. "Even at that time, he didn't admit to killing them because he didn't! He has been innocent this whole time, hasn't he? And all of this time I've treated him so badly…"

"Have a look for yourself." Oban commanded, muttering a few words as a wavering image appeared before them.

"I don't need to see anymore! I don't need to see ever again!" Hitomi called over her shoulder cheerfully as she ran out of the room.

I can see with my heart…

"Fine. Stupid girl." Oban muttered, feeling very tired all of a sudden. She sat down, feeling her age for the first time in years. She glanced at the image, watching Folken chase Makai out of the palace in Asturia after he discovered the plot against the Allies. But it was too late. Fire exploded behind him as he took to the air, fleeing for his life. His brother watched from far below, filled with feelings of pain and betrayal. Folken didn't see him.

"I just wish…" Oban murmured, her eyes closing. Those were to be the last words on the cantankerous old sorceress's lips before she quietly passed on. It seemed quite out-of-character for her.

I guess that this is what they call an adrenaline rush… She thought, realizing that she was sprinting as fast as she had during her high school track days. Suddenly, she found herself at his door and barged in without so much as a knock.

"FOLKEN!" she cried. She was startled when she noticed that he wasn't there.

"Folken?" She looked in all of his adjoining rooms, but she couldn't find him. Then, she saw him through the window. He was out on the balcony, staring up into the heavens, drenched from the downpour. "FOLKEN!" She nearly broke the doors down running out to see him. He didn't even seem to notice that she was there. "Folken… I understand now. I know that you didn't do all of those terrible things. I'm sorry, Folken. I've made your life so sad. I went against everything I ever promised to you. I once told you that I trusted you. I know now that by not believing in you, that I betrayed your trust. But I know now and things will be better and we'll be happy." She wrapped her arms around him, not seeming to notice that he hadn't said a word.

"So what has brought you to this shocking revelation?" he asked in the same emotionless tone she'd grown so accustomed to.

"I don't know. I guess that I just put the pieces together. It never made sense to me, you betraying everyone. It just didn't seem like you. The new you, anyway. Now I know that you're innocent. You didn't kill them."

"I've always known that I didn't kill them, but I'm still responsible. Makai never would have gone in there if I hadn't betrayed Zaibach."

"But you didn't kill them, Folken. That's what's important. That's how I know that I can forgive you."

How I know that I can love you…

"You just don't get it, do you? If it wasn't for me, all of your friends would still be alive. So in a way, you've been right all along. I killed them."

"I don't believe that. Just because things didn't turn out the way you wanted doesn't defeat the fact that you tried to save them. You've always been trying, Folken."

He awkwardly placed his metal hand against her own.

"Hitomi, if I tried, I could crush your hand in an instant. I could even kill you."

"You could, but you won't." she whispered.

"I know you, Folken. I've always known you."

"Maybe you know me better than I know myself." he murmured, brushing back a piece of her hair from her face.

"What have you done to me?" He stepped back for a moment, taking her shoulders in his hands. "Hitomi, do you know that I-?"

"You what?" she asked softly.

"I… Oh never mind." he muttered, striding back into his room.

"Folken, you know what?" she asked, perching herself on his bed. "We're alike, you and I. We've loved and we've lost. But we keep moving forward. We always move forward. Inside, we may seem unsure, but we never give up. We just keep going. That's why we're alike." She didn't notice when he came closer, taking her by the shoulders. He was staring at her and it was beginning to unnerve her. "Folken, what are you doing?"

"Nothing that I shouldn't have done a long time ago…" he told her, tracing her jawline with one of his fingers made of flesh and bone, sending a small shiver down her spine.

He moved in, and after what seemed like an eternity, his lips finally found hers. The kiss was warm and soft. Passionate. Nothing like the chaste kiss they'd shared at that horrible wedding. She wrapped her arms around his neck. It felt so wrong and yet, so very right. Suddenly, they broke apart, gasping for air, avoiding eye contact. Finally, she took his hands in her own, looking up at him.

"Are you sure about this?"

"I've never been more certain of anything in my life…" he murmured, as much as he hated clichés, he was using them all the more frequently. His whole life was one big ironic cliché. However, if it had brought her to him, then he didn't care anymore.

Hitomi awoke the next morning. She blinked tiredly, glancing about.

Wait a minute? Where am I? She clutched the bed covers about her. Then it all came back to her. Her face turned a bright tomato red. Had she really done that with Folken? Well at least she knew where she was now. It seemed that Oban had been right. Folken's room was quite extravagant. She seemed to be engulfed by black marble and velvet. It was beautiful, in an outlandish sort of way. She wondered if she'd be in here a lot more often now. Her face immediately reddened once more. Only one thing was missing from this embarrassing moment, and that was Folken. She looked to her right and saw that the tousled covers no longer covered her husband.

"Where is he?" she wondered aloud.

"Um… Good morning, Milady!" Ari chirped hesitantly as Hitomi squeaked in surprise.

"I was just bringing your things in here. You know, your clothing, your hairbrush, that sort of thing." She hung a slew of dresses in the very masculine armoire.

"Oh no, that's really not necessary…" She began to get out of bed, but then noting her state of undress, thought better of it.

"Sorry, Milady; Lord Folken's orders."

"Folken told you to do this…?" she asked hopelessly. Apparently her guess had been right on the mark.

"Of course. It's about time too, in my opinion. It's just not natural. You've been married for almost a year now."

"Oh. Right." Hitomi murmured, still incomprehensibly embarrassed.

"So…" The maid got right next to her so that she was barely a nose away. "How was it?"

"UGH! ARI!" Hitomi flushed, throwing a pillow at her. "I'M NOT ANSWERING THAT!"

"Oh, then it was good. Hear that, Yuushi? It was good!" Said dragonslayer came in just then, to Hitomi's horror.

"I'll have to tell Lord Folken. He'll be quite pleased I'm sure."

"YOU GUYS!" Hitomi shrieked, becoming more humiliated by the minute as her sex life became Vione gossip.

"Oh, sorry, sorry! I just came to bring you a message from the emperor." Yuushi excused himself.

"Well, what is it?" she asked curiously.

"'Goodbye.'"

"That's it?" she asked incredulously.

"Yep. That's it." he acknowledged.

"But where is he going?"

"The same place where I'm going in a moment. The king of Fanelia has invaded. He's right outside the ship. Lord Folken went to defeat him once and for all."

"Oh no… Not Van…" Hitomi murmured.

Flashback

"I'll always be there for you…" he promised softly. "Always…"

End of Flashback

"Van, I know that's why you're doing this… Ari, quickly! Get me something to wear! Yuushi, fetch me a hors! And for God's sake, be quick about it!" Not daring to question her, they quickly went to perform their duties.

"So, my brother…" Folken whispered icily across the battle field. No guymelefs were necessary for this fight. Hand-to-hand combat would do nicely. "We meet again…"

"For the last time…" Van finished, clutching the sword that had once belonged to Allen Schezar.

"So it would seem." Folken murmured. A dusty wind blew across the dry, lifeless land that separated the two brothers.

A/N: Well, something's going down out there obviously. Will Hitomi make it in time? Will Van and Folken both die? Will the stupid Destiny War ever end? And what about the author? Does she feel regret for not updating her fic for 15 months? (That last one's a definite yes…) I'm so sorry that it took so long to get this out. Life has been crazy and my priorities have shifted. I promise you, no matter how long it takes, I will finish this. There are two more chapters and an epilogue chapter coming up, and then TOTH will finally be put to rest. Thank you for your patience, your understanding, for not killing me, etc… Thanks for everything. It's a crazy world folks. Besides finishing the last three chapters, I'm going to go back and fix the many mistakes I've found in previous chapters and change the songs in chapter 3 and 10… Please review!

Next Time On "Tears of the Heart":

"And I know that it hurts and I know that inside you're crying, Van. I know that your heart is broken and weeping. But you can't hate Folken. You shouldn't hate him. It's not his fault…"

"LIAR!" Van yelled defensively, his eyes widening in anger at her words.

"If you'd been there, Hitomi, if you'd seen what I saw… If you saw what that bastard did to Merle…"

"Van, it wasn't him! Don't you understand me?"