Disclaimer: If I owned it, I wouldn't be writing fan fiction!

Warnings: Language and discussion about sex.

Finding Sakura

Chapter Seven

By Michiru's Mirror

In Sai's opinion, Naruto's attempt to engage Sasuke in conversation was doomed, but admirable in its own way. Here Naruto was, terrified for Sakura's fate, and still he tried to bring Sasuke around with some friendly talk.

"Hey, Uchiha! Did you choose that outfit yourself or did Orochimaru want the best view of your lovely shaved chest possible while you sucked him off?"

In the old days that probably would have been a cue for an answering round of Sasuke's wit, but that was then and this was now. He barely spared Naruto a glance before turning his back and walking away. Granted, there weren't many places to go, but the message was clear.

About an hour ago, Ino had scouted out the lair of Orochimaru's that Sasuke had just destroyed and determined that Sakura wasn't anywhere around, Teams Seven and Ten returned to it for the limited cover it could offer. Then it was Ino and Kakashi's job to go and find Sakura; they couldn't save her until they knew where she was.

Unfortunately, this left everyone else behind with nothing to do but wait in the destroyed and dusty corridors that used to house a madman and his slaves.

After Sasuke left, Naruto made no attempt to follow. His shoulders drooping with exhaustion, Naruto almost collapsed onto a crumbled piece of wall as though his legs couldn't support him anymore.

Sai stared at his teammate for a moment, observing the defeat written into every line of Naruto's face. He again had to wonder what about connections made so much pain worth it.

Well, there was no doubt that Naruto found it worth it in Sasuke's case. Though Sai couldn't understand why, everything Naruto had been through made it clear that his feelings for Sasuke ran deep. Was that why Naruto had been so passionate about this mission, Sai wondered, because he was determined to protect Sasuke from Demon Sakura?

No…the way Naruto refused Sasuke's assertion that Sakura might have to be killed, and his anger at Sai copulating with her, made it clear that Naruto had some feeling for her as well. Sai had always known that, but he wondered if it was the same type of feeling he had for Sasuke. Sai didn't think so, because Naruto treated the two of them so differently. If he had the same feelings for Sakura as he did for Sasuke, wouldn't he treat them the same way?

"Are you in love with her?" he asked Naruto. If Naruto's feelings for Sakura were romantic, it would explain the different treatment he gave Sasuke and Sakura.

The glare he got from Naruto would have been scary, had Naruto the energy to back it up. "What?"

"Are you in love with her," Sai repeated.

Naruto bristled, and for a moment Sai thought the other man was going to rally the strength to hit him after all. But then Naruto folded in on himself, sagging down as though all the fight had been sucked away from him. "Yes," he said.

Sai waited for elaboration, but none came. That was no good—he hadn't learned anything!

"Well," said Sai thoughtfully, "Then if Sakura had asked you to fuck her like she asked me to, would you have done it?"

Naruto looked like he'd been hit over the head. "Wh—wh—NO!"

Sai was growing more confused. "I thought when a man loved a woman, he was supposed to want her."

"Oh shit Sai!" Naruto bent over and put his head in his hands as though he had a terrible migraine. "What is the matter with you? Why can't you understand that questions like this are not okay to ask?"

"Well, why not?" said Sai. "What's so wrong with everything I do? Why is it that when I try to address people in a friendly way they get angry at me?" Naruto looked up in astonishment; Sai's voice was rising with almost every word he spoke, and there was a trace of a scowl on his pale features. "Why, when I try to get close to you and Sakura, am I interfering? Why, when I give Sakura what she asked for, can't I ask why it's wrong? How am I supposed to learn to do anything right if no one will tell me anything except that I'm always wrong, wrong, wrong!"

A great deal of emotion was building inside of him, Sai realized, and he didn't like it. Everything was negative now. Joining Team Seven led him to feel more positive then he had in a long time, with memories of his brother and budding friendships with his teammates. But if this was how it all ended up, it wasn't worth it!

The frustration and helplessness boiled in Sai's stomach like poison, making him feel sick. Straightening himself up and forcing his face back under control, he was about to take his leave when Naruto spoke.

"If Sakura-chan had come to me asking me to hurt her, I'd have taken her to the hospital, or tried to talk to her about why she was feeling so fucked up. That's why she didn't come to me," Naruto said. "She probably went to you, 'cause she knew you don't know any better. And…"

Naruto looked up, but couldn't meet Sai's eyes. "And I know you don't know any better either. It's not…fair…to take it out on you, and I was wrong."

Sai thought about that, and felt the pain in his belly lessen a bit. "Kakashi-sensei said that people were mad at me because I'm a convenient scapegoat."

"Yeah." Naruto smiled sadly, leaning back now and supporting himself on his hands. "This is the shit part about loving someone; when they hurt, you hurt too, and it can make you act like a real moron." And then Naruto was gripping the wall so hard his knuckles were turning white and clenching his jaw painfully tight.

"Fuck," he said. "What do I do if she dies?"

"I don't know," said Sai, because he didn't.

Naruto had a look of such despair on his usually jovial features that Sai felt awkward for almost the first time in his life. There was no way he could even begin to understand the pain in Naruto's heart, so what could he possibly say to comfort him? I'm sorry? I know how you feel? I'll do whatever you need to help? It all sounded wrong and worse, presumptuous. If there was ever a time for delicate speech it was now, and Sai was very aware that he couldn't provide it.

So he walked away instead.

For a few minutes, he allowed himself the luxury of not thinking about a thing. He wandered over fallen stones and through nearly-caved-in hallways and let his mind drift. How had Orochimaru built this place, he wondered? Did he want it for defense, or for research, or was this perhaps a home to relax in?

Sai had a hard time imagining anyone relaxing in this dank, moldy, cockroach infested place, but maybe Orochimaru had just had different standards.

But Sai found he couldn't keep his brain off of what he'd just heard for long. He deeply appreciated Naruto's apology, but more, he appreciated Naruto's explanation on "the shit part of loving someone."

Things were beginning to make a kind of sense. If you loved someone it brought feelings of protectiveness and possessiveness, and joy as well—Sai remembered a shadow of that joy in himself when his brother lived. But the tradeoff was that if the other person got hurt, you in turn suffered, just like Naruto said. Furthermore, there was an irrational side that a person developed where their loved ones were concerned.

Sai's thoughts turned to Sasuke, to how he'd said he'd broken his bonds because he understood the strength of them. Sai understood his meaning: Sasuke had decided that worry and protective feelings simply weren't worth it. Or maybe that was his reasoning. By now, Sai knew better than to assume anything involving emotions.

Besides, since Sai was himself wondering if connections were worth it, it was entirely possible that he was projecting his own thoughts onto Sasuke.

Well, there was only one way to find out. Sai retraced his steps and then followed the path Sasuke had taken. He was not surprised to see that Sasuke hadn't gone far. After all, he needed to stay close to hear Ino or Kakashi when they came back, and he just needed to turn his back and duck out of sight to make his point to Naruto. Sasuke was sitting on one of the crumbled walls like Naruto had been, though he did it with considerably more grace and poise.

Sasuke spoke as soon as Sai was in hearing range, though he made no other move to acknowledge the other boy's presence. "Sakura's not as sweet as Naruto thinks she is, you know."

Sai crossed his arms and rested against another wall. "You have no feelings for her, then?"

Sasuke smirked and tilted his head towards Sai. "Why do you ask? Are you in love with her too? First Naruto, then Lee, and now you?"

Sai considered Sasuke's amused face. Did it mean anything that he wouldn't answer the question? It could mean that he hated her; his saying that Sakura wasn't very sweet would bear that out. Or it could mean that he was still trying to break his bonds with his old team and didn't want to say anything that might show lingering affection.

He simply couldn't tell. Try as he might, Sai couldn't read Sasuke's expression at all.

"No," he answered finally. "I don't think I am. But I trust her more than anyone except Naruto. She always tells me the truth, and she's the only one patient enough to explain things to me when I get confused." Sai tilted his head back and thought. "Also, I enjoy her company. She doesn't yell at me for no reason or call me strange unless I've really done something wrong."

"The truth?" said Sasuke. "Like she told you the truth when she got you to cut her? Face it, she took advantage of you, just like she does everybody else."

Sai frowned in confusion. "Took advantage of me?"

"You know, getting you to cut her up because anyone else would have known something was wrong. She knew you didn't know any better, and knew you trusted her, and used that to get you to do her the way she wanted."

Sai mulled over that. It was true that she hadn't come to him for affection, and that she had known how inexperienced he was in matters of sex and human relations. "That's quite possible," he said. There was a slight pain in his chest at the admission, a pressure that Sai didn't like.

Instead of dwelling on it, he tried to change the topic. "If 'anyone else would have known,' then what about you? You don't seem to mind hurting her, so if she had come to you asking you to do that to her, would you have?"

"Of course not," said Sasuke, as though the very idea was ridiculous.

"Because you would have realized something was wrong with her?"

"Because I have no interest in sex as it takes up too much energy and time, and no interest in Sakura in general. Particularly not when she's dealing with deep, traumatic emotional issues. I have to focus on my brother."

"So, you would have been happy to let Sakura destroy herself in front of you…you just wouldn't want to be part of what destroyed her because you 'wouldn't want to waste the energy.'"

"That's about it," said Sasuke.

"I see," said Sai. "So you broke your connections with Naruto and Sakura not to spare yourself the pain of worrying, but instead because you don't want to waste energy on them."

"Basically," said Sasuke, "And I suggest you do the same. Wasting time on overly emotional people like that idiot Naruto gets in the way of everything, from your logic to your fighting skills."

"I was just thinking the same thing," said Sai. "I was talking to Naruto about Sakura, and thinking about how strongly his judgment has been impaired, and how hurt he is. I had to wonder if such strong feelings are worth the bother."

Sasuke raised an eyebrow. "And now you know for sure?"

"Yes," said Sai. "They are worth it."

Sasuke's eyebrow went higher. "What makes you say that after the discussion we've just had?"

"That you say they aren't," said Sai. "I'm inexperienced at having friends, and I very obviously messed up badly this time around. But however low I fall, I know I don't want to go as low as you.

"If ever I needed more evidence that you are the most loathsome man ever produced by Fire Country, this conversation provided it. If giving up on my friends will make me like you, then I'd best do everything in my power to avoid that."

Turning his back, Sai walked away. He'd learned what he needed to know.

Sasuke impassively watched his replacement walk out of sight before leaning back and sighing. "Not quite," he said quietly. "However low I fall, there's still one man more loathsome than me."

Sai returned to Naruto feeling more clear-headed then he had since Sakura first came to his apartment.

He knew that his words often had the opposite effect of what he wanted, so he didn't bother to try and comfort Naruto verbally. Instead, he sat down near his teammate quietly and didn't say a word. If Naruto wanted to talk, he would listen. If Naruto just wanted silent support, he would do his best to provide that, too. This was a scary idea to Sai, because he hadn't read about it in any book nor gotten it from advice anyone had given him. It was instead one of the first ideas he'd ever had that came from his own experience, and there was every possibility that it would backfire…but it was the best he had to offer.

When Naruto looked up and gave Sai a wan smile, Sai nodded back. Maybe he was finally doing something right.

It was another half hour of companiable silence before Ino returned to her body, her face flushed from exertion. At this point she was so worn out that Chouji had to carry her back to the lair.

Naruto grimaced at the state of her. "I guess it'd be stupid to ask if you're okay."

Ino gave him a look. "Pretty stupid, yeah."

"Then can I ask if you found her?" Naruto said.

Ino sighed and dropped her gaze. "No…I'm sorry. But those stupid demons are everywhere! Some of 'em are getting closer to this place, too. We should probably move within the next hour or they might find us."

"What should we do if Kakashi-sensei isn't back in time?" asked Sai. His old training instructed him to leave their commander behind, but Sai didn't think for a minute that anyone in this group except Sasuke would like that idea.

"No need to worry about that," said a voice from behind the group; everyone jumped and swiveled around to see Kakashi's amused face. "I have arrived…and you people need to work on sensing chakra, especially when you're in the middle of a hostile environment." Cheerful as his tone was, the assembled ninja knew when they'd been put in their place. There was a collective hanging of heads.

Sasuke, obviously paying better attention than the rest of them, returned from where he'd sequestered himself at that moment.

"Anyway," said Kakashi, nodding a greeting to Sasuke, "I've spotted her, and we need to hurry, because a lot of those demons are forming on her. We're facing a small army."

"Then we'll need reinforcements," said Shikamaru. "Ino is as good as out and I couldn't hurt the things a bit last time we fought."

"We can't wait for them, though!" interjected Naruto. "That stupid demon keeps getting stronger, and anyway what about Sakura-chan? She's in trouble now!"

"I agree," said Kakashi. "We don't know if we're on a time limit of some kind, and it's best not to find out. The situation is much better than it was last time anyway. Everyone is conscious, for a start."

Kakashi turned to Shikamaru and Ino. "But you're right, we need more people, and you two are no good. Ino can't do anything when she can't stand up, and Shikamaru, your brain is too valuable to waste in a fight where you can't do much anyway. Go home, and tell the Hokage we need help. In the meantime, we're going to launch our attack." Ino looked like she wanted to protest, but Shikamaru held up his hand and gave her a stern look.

Ino looked like she'd swallowed a lemon, but she backed down.

Kakashi adjusted his hitai-ate above his eye, and said, "Okay: here's the plan. Sai, some of my ninken are coming back now with the art supplies that got scattered last fight, so you're in.

"This is a really simple strategy. We're going to mask our chakra, sneak up on them, and attack. I'm going first with a raikiri to scatter the demons, since Sasuke proved that's effective, and then everyone except Sasuke is going to form around Sakura. We keep the demons away from her, and that's going to be Sasuke's cue to jump into her head, while we four—" Kakashi gestured vaguely at himself, Naruto, Sai and Chouji "—keep the demons away.

"Questions?"

A/N

So now we have two opinions of Sakura: Auntie's opinion is that she's super-pure and compassionate, and Sasuke's that she's a manipulative bitch. Hmm…

Dang, I forgot to mention this last time: thanks to blckfirekllr for the great criticism they gave me in chapter 5 (specifically that chapter one had great drama, but later chapters had gone a bit downhill since I was focusing more on action). That's a good point. Just because I love action doesn't mean I should let character development drop by the wayside. I'm proud of what I did with Sai in Chapter Four, but Chapter Five only had a bit of characterization in it, yeah? The important part was the return of Sasuke, so I was trying to give him a big lead-in, and if I didn't do a good job of it I always appreciate being told. Rest assured: what Sakura did (under the influence of a demon though she may have been) and what Naruto said will be dealt with. We just have to save Sakura's life first.