It's not going away, either... I'll think I've found an answer, then start second guessing myself. And realize what I thought was right, was really wrong.
I end up right where I started from.
Confused. Doubting. Wondering.
Confusion isn't always bad... But when it gets to certain things... you don't want to be confused. Yes, I enjoy the journey as much as the answer itself, but an endless trek towards what could possibly be absolutely nothing...?
It breaks the spirit.
Breaks the mind.
Breaks everything down and you go spiraling.
The worst feeling has to be feeling useless. You're numb. You can't do anything. Everything goes wrong. Nothing makes sense anymore.
I'm marching towards nothing. Any search for answers has been coming up blank. Things that I used to think were true end up false. And damnit, I don't want to find out that there's no way to fix things! I have to get my brother back, no matter the cost.
The world is ugly. It hurts people, rips them to shreds without shedding a tear. You can't escape its grasp. It's going to get you eventually.
I'm a fifteen year old and I'm trying to face the world. I'll wade through the uselessness of what I truly am. I'll sift the truths from the lies. I'll laugh at my confusion.
And when I do finally get yanked to the ground by the cruelty of the world, I know I'll have plenty of support to get back up again and continue my journey.
This... was actually one of my infamous rambles, to be honest. I wrote it last night when I was in a bit of a pissy mood. Then, as I was looking back on it this morning, I realized how much I sounded like Ed. So I edited a few things and there ya go It's probably not the best quality, but I was writing it late at night when I was tired and angry... Whatev, hope you enjoyed it! Reviews welcomed!