I could never join the circus, because I'm a terrible juggler. I have so many things going on in my life and I just can't keep all the balls in the air—I'm sorry this is the ball I keep dropping. I don't know how many of you are still interested, but I'm going to keep writing, no matter how many times I drop the ball.
..
It had been three days since the failed coffee outing with Maura, and Jane had tried very hard to put the entire incident out of her mind; tried very hard to forget the brilliant, awkward, endearing girl; tried very hard to forget the onslaught of feelings that came with the girl; and tried very, very hard to forget Garrett. The boyfriend. Who was probably revoltingly handsome and intelligent.
No matter how hard she tried to forget, Jane's heart raced every time she walked into the lobby of their shared residence building, every time the elevator door dinged open, every time her eyes fell upon honey blonde hair. Her heart raced, and upon every realization that Maura was not in the lobby, or the elevator, or in line for waffles, her heart dropped. She was disappointed. Somehow, she missed this girl...
Don't be ridiculous. You don't even know her.
Besides.
She has a boyfriend.
Which is irrelevant anyway; what the fuck do you care?
For the third night in a row, Jane lay awake, her mind racing in circles. Every time she closed her eyes she saw those pink cheeks; those incredible eyes, full of colour, curiosity, life.
Stop it. They're just eyes. She's just a girl.
A girl.
With a boyfriend.
And you don't care.
With a sigh, Jane sat up in bed. It was just after five a.m. but she doubted she would be getting any more sleep, so she untangled her long legs from the sheets, shoved her feet into her favourite worn canvas shoes, and grabbed her keys and sweatshirt on her way out of the room.
The outside air was crisp, and the sky was a pale gray, growing steadily brighter by the minute. Absentmindedly, Jane wandered across the Lawn towards the forest, her feet automatically seeking out the trailhead where she had first interacted with Maura. She had not allowed herself to return to this place, but suddenly found herself there regardless. With a pang of disappointment she realized that Maura's rock was empty. Jane sighed and turned back towards the residence building, but at the very last moment veered right and headed in the opposite direction.
Within minutes she stood outside the ornate double doors, and with only a glance thrown over her shoulder she knelt and began to pick the lock with the keychain ring she had straightened on the way from the forest. If anyone questioned her she would simply say that the door had been unlocked and, as a first year, she had been unaware that the room was off limits after hours. It wasn't that strange for someone to play piano before 6:00 am, was it?
Jane scoffed at her own ridiculousness, but smiled all the same when the doors fell open and her eye caught the shine of the Steinbeck. Deciding not to turn on any artificial lights, Jane made her way forward by the dim light of dawn filtering through the high windows of the auditorium, pleased with the way they bounced off the sleek lid of the piano.
Within seconds of placing her fingers on the keys Jane felt more at peace than she had in days. Somehow, the music carried with it the calm she had felt with her nonna near by. Once again without making and decisions, Jane began to play. Stumbling only slightly over some of the more difficult sections, Jane allowed Chopin's allegro de concert to flow from her fingertips.
When she had finished, Jane say back with a sigh. In a strange repeat of the last time she had seen Maura, Jane was pulled from her reverie by a voice.
"You really do play beautifully, Jane."
Maura must have entered while Jane was playing, and was now standing in a dusty beam of light near the stage.
Jane swivelled around in her seat to look at the girl in surprise; she was unable to say anything but "Maura."
Maura offered a nervous sort of smile, before asking cautiously if it was alright for her to join Jane on the stage. Jane nodded somewhat stiffly, entirely unprepared to deal with the onslaught of strange emotions she had come to associate with this strange, beautiful girl.
Maura seated herself daintily next to Jane on the piano bench and placed her hands on the keys. Enraptured by Maura' fingers dancing across the keys with both speed and precision, it took Jane a moment to recognise that she was playing an old Italian lullaby.
As Maura completed the first verse, Jane felt her turn her head, and after only a brief moment of hesitation, raised her face to meet Maura's eyes. Though she did not speak, Jane understood and placed her hands alongside Maura's on the keyboard and together they played the remainder of the lullaby, with synchronicity of movements that shocked and pleased Jane, and let loose an entirely new set of indecipherable feelings in her gut.
...
Note: Reunited at last!
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With love,
R&D