Chapter 8

The week passed, and on Wednesday evening she was laying flat on her stomach, staring at the TV in front of her.

Cameron did not even know what movie she was watching. She had turned it on almost two hours ago but just couldn't focus on the movie. All she could do was think about the job offer.

Tonight she was alone. She had told Joe she needed to think about some things.

Joe had completely understood telling her whatever she decided he would be there backing her all the way. If she decided to take the job he would move with her to Yale. If not he would be fine with that too.

But when she thought about it she wasn't even sure what made her hesitate in the first place. This was a major opportunity and she shouldn't hesitate at all.

But why was she anyway?

Cameron had wanted to move a long, long time ago already. Once she'd almost done it, because of House. But he had been the one who had brought her back. This time was different.

He wanted her to go.

Gosh, was this frustrating. She knew she still had feelings for House; she tried to even convince herself that this wasn't the case. It was.

But she also knew there was not a slight chance that he would ever stop being so stubborn about it. They were doomed from the beginning on, so why even bother?

And now there was Joe. He was supportive and he was literally everything a girl could dream of. He was being a gentleman when you needed it, he was honest and caring.

Why couldn't she just fall for him like she did for House?

Of course she loved Joe, she always had and always would; she even could imagine getting old with him. But was this really what she wanted?

On the other hand, was trying to convince your boss that he has feelings for you too what she wanted? Definitely not.

She wanted to be happy and with Joe, she could be happy, she knew she would be.

Wasn't that what everyone counted on after all?

Cameron sat up, took a deep breath and sighed loudly.

This wasn't anything like this should supposed to be. But she wasn't this naïve kid anymore; she wouldn't let anyone ruin her life. She had to do something.

On that she got up, took her keys, a jacket and her cell and left her apartment.

She would get rid of "her" problem either way. She just had to.

Twenty minutes later she had parked her car on the street in front of the building he was living in. She stayed in the car for another five minutes; then finally after finding the braveness within to walk to the door.

House had seen her from the window when she had arrived. And finally after ten minutes she knocked in his door. It was a steady, determined knock.

"I already thought you wanted to stalk me from your car," he said when he opened the door.

She blushed immediately and when he had fully scanned her body he started to grin widely.

Blue striped pj pants and a white camisole under a wool jacket. When she noticed that he was checking her out she quickly zipped her jacket and cleared her throat.

"Could I talk to you? Inside?" she looked back at him, a pleading look on her face.

House frowned for a second then nodded shortly, stepping aside to let her in.

She entered his condo; suddenly it was like that evening two years ago was happening again. He waited behind her for a moment, waiting for her to say something.

"So, are you just going to stand here? I mean not that I would complain, you would make a good statue like this," he teased and then limped passed her to the kitchen.

"Why do you want me to go?" she suddenly burst out before he had a chance to enter the kitchen fully. He stopped mid-step, but did not turn around.

"House?" she followed up after several seconds had passed.

"God you're annoying. I was thinking of offering you a beer but maybe I should just throw you out," he said hurriedly vanishing into the kitchen before her eyes.

But Cameron would not let this go so easily. So she followed him.

"Do you want me to go?" she almost whispered.

"For god's sake. Why do you always have to make it so personal? I thought it would be a great opportunity for you. For any one to take; a chance you should not pass," he said, then took a big sip of his beer.

"That is all?" she almost sounded disappointed.

"No," he made a grimace, "I am also incredibly afraid of my feelings for you and I want you to leave before I can fall for you."

"Don't do that," she lowered her face, staring at her sneakers.

"Do what? Wasn't that what you wanted to hear? Why you came here? So I would admit I have feelings for you?" he stepped nearer, so they were only an arm length apart.

"Right, I forgot that Gregory House does not have any feelings," she laughed humourlessly.

"Well, thank god you have more than enough for half of humanity then," he joked, with that comment was when her facial impression changed again. She was not hurt by his line, she was actually getting angry.

'Good,' he thought.

They stared at each other for a while but nothing. Maybe he had seen anger where no anger was.

"You know what? Sorry, I wasted your time, just forget it," she finally cut through the silence braking the eye contact.

She turned around to leave. House suddenly leaned forward and grabbed her by the wrist, pulling her slightly backwards.

Cameron looked down on his long fingers which were encircling her wrist and after a long moment finally looked up at him.

The hand was gone the next.

"You better leave," he grumbled, looking down, then turned around and went into his bedroom, closing the door behind himself.

When Cameron entered her apartment a short time later, she inhaled deeply forcing herself to not laugh out loud at the comical side of the evening.

House was acting like he didn't even know what he wanted. One time he would be pushing her away, the next time he was pulling her back. Push and Pull, which was everything their relationship, if you could call it that, was about.

It was just so damn frustrating.

The following day passes with ease. But something had changed.

Cameron now knew what she was going to do with Yale. When she had left House's apartment she had thought it had been useless but actually last night had done its purpose.

She had called Joe immediately after she had arrived back home after her intermezzo with House. And of course, he was okay with her decision.

There was no pushing or pulling.

Now she was on her way back from Dr Andrew's office to Cuddy to inform her about her decision. She knew it would be hard, but it was the right decision.

Cameron knocked on her door and the Dean of Medicine waved her inside, indicating her to take seat while she finished a phone call.

"So, Dr. Cameron, I am taking it you are here because of the offer from Dr. Andrews?" Cuddy said after she had hung up, now focusing completely on House's only female employee.

"That is right," Cameron smiled slightly.

"And?"

Cameron took a deep breath and exhaled slowly.

"I am going to take the job."

Cuddy looked up at her, surprised. She actually could not believe she was really doing this.

But there was actually no other option for her. Not like this.

"And you are absolutely sure?"

Cameron just nodded as a response feeling lighter. Like someone had lifted the heavy weight which had been there for the past three years off of her shoulders.

"Okay then. I'll prepare everything with our lawyer. You are aware that the condition under which I agreed to release you is to find a replacement?"

"Yes," Cameron sighed uncomfortable.

"Don't worry, if House starts to be a problem I am going to decide for him," Cuddy smiled sympathetically.

It was a shame she had never really gotten close to Cuddy, of course she was her boss's boss, but still she seemed like they had a lot in common.

"You want to grab a bite?" Wilson put his head through the drawn blinds into House's office.

House was sitting behind his desk, fumbling with something in his backpack as Wilson entered the room.

"What are you doing there?"

"Trying to detangle my earphones." He said lifting his iPod and the wires in question.

Wilson sat down across him, putting his bag down on his lap. He watched House for a few seconds.

"So, rumour has it Dr. Cameron agreed to take the job at Yale."

House hesitated a second, of course she would, that shouldn't have been a surprise to him, but nonetheless it was. He quickly covered his hesitance with looking up at Wilson,

"She made the right choice"

Now the oncologist raised his eyebrows,"She did?"

"Yeah, of course. Even I would've taken the job, but the dean there hasn't got such a nice cleavage," he made a face and grinned.

"Cameron is going to leave, House. You are aware of that, aren't you?"

"Oh, really? I thought she would just stay here and work via phone," House goofed, focusing back on his wires.

"You are going to let her go? Just like that?" Wilson asked suspicious.

On that House just shrugged with his shoulders. Of course he would never admit anything else.

"Are you sure you want this?"

"Are you sure you should be giving me advice concerning women?" House barked back, threw the earphones inside his backpack and got up.

Wilson followed him anyways, and when they had reached the parking lot he stopped while House put his keys into the ignition of his motorcycle.

"It's ironic, you know?" Wilson said.

"What is?" House said fitting his helmet and lifting his right leg over the machine.

"You call everyone a coward. But when it comes to your own feelings you are the biggest of them all. You really think she is going to stay, aren't you?"

House did not answer; instead he looked up at him, surprised.

"Well, let me tell you House, she isn't going to wait forever. No one is worth that, not even you," with that Wilson gave him a last sympathetic look and then went on to his own car, leaving a dazzled House in his wake.

"So you are really going to leave?"

Chase got up from his place behind her desk when she entered the conference room the next morning.

But Cameron just had to smile; the gossip talk at PPTH had obviously been faster than her.

"Who can blame her? I'm sure I'll be leaving as soon as I get the chance," Foreman said and pointed to House's office.

"Aw, I think you just broke my tiny, tiny heart," House entered the conference room and made a face, then quickly looked at Cameron but went straight to his office.

Of course he would never ever let loose a word about what happened two nights ago again. That was what he was best at, denial.

"When are you starting?" Chase sat down at the table, not caring about the open door of House's office.

"In about a month," Cameron said, while she put down her bag.

"Already? Can't wait to get out, huh?" Foreman grinned at her.

"Actually, it were supposed to be two, but Cuddy's lawyers worked it out with Dr. Mellman and it looks like I can start next month,"

"Well, well, well … good news," House came out of his office, throwing each of them a file,

"but as long as you are here, we got a case."

Cameron took the file but allowed herself to shortly glance at him. He really showed no reaction at all, nothing.

But why had he tried to hold her back two nights ago?

'Forget about this,' she told herself. She would be moving in a few weeks. And then she would start a new life without House. But with Joe.

A guy she had been in love with for over 15 years now, and who was actually making her happy.

And wasn't that what life was all about?