Chapter 2

Seriously?

The following days after the fight I had with Gale, I did absolutely nothing, except for eat when the baby was hungry. I sat on the couch with a quill over my body and watched the flames crackle and come to life in the fireplace. Winter was coming and already the air was chilly and cold to the point it would cause Goosebumps to break out over your body. I didn't care about the winter season rolling in and taking its tolls on the district. There was barely a district left anymore and I'm pretty sure our population was under 100 people. It got me curious as to how they were going to manage the construction when winter actually hit, negative degree weather was definitely going to be a problem for the construction workers and it wasn't fun to be in. Did we even have people working on the rebuilding of the District. How much work did they get done in the past 6 months? I was to busy finding out I was pregnant and dealing with the return of my murderous friend to really find out what was going on with the construction. District 12 was probably the last District the New capitol cared about, they had to focus on the ones that mattered, the ones that exported food, clothes, stonework, power systems, Just about every district was a top priority over 12. We were mining which the mines were closed and probably destroyed. We were no good to anyone anymore in my opinion, why would people go back to a graveyard, a place full of painful memories and death. Only a few dedicated citizens have return and are determined to make things work. The devastation and the amount of destruction I have witnessed with my own eyes when they dropped me off was more than I could handle. It made me sick to my stomach that I had barely recognized my own home. The seam was all but gone, followed by the square and half of the justice building. We had no shops left, no hob, or butcher, or liquor vendor, nothing. The only thing The New Capitol has sent to us is a storage building full of donated clothes, food and shelter for those who needed it. Some people that have returned even took shelter in the empty victor homes, but none close to mine.

It makes me wonder who will deliver my baby when I go into labor. Did we even have a doctor in the District? Probably not. We didn't have much of anything these days, not like we ever had anything. This was a mistake, the baby would arrive in less than three months and I had no clothes for her or a crib, or even a doctor to deliver it, I'm not even sure if its healthy. This was why I didn't want to ever bring a baby into this world, the destruction, the sadness, there is nothing here but death and despair. I wanted to keep her from all this, but I can't, it's too late to change my mind or abort the pregnancy. Although getting pregnant may have been an accident, as unwanted and unplanned as the pregnancy has been I'd never, ever even consider getting an abortion. I'd never kill Peeta's baby, she or he was a living, breathing, helpless human being inside me, what kind of monster would that make me if I were to choose to kill this baby?

She is still today, haven't felt her kick once which is probably an indication she is asleep, warm and cozy inside her nice warm womb. I sigh in content and watch the flames burst while resting a hand on my large tummy. My legs are stretched out across the couch and the quill covers my body. It's a boring day which I'm not complaining, its better than fighting with Gale and having him insult Peeta. I will never lose hope that one day he will return to me and be father to his baby, but something Gale says does make a lot of sense. Why have I kept this secret from Peeta? If I really wanted to I'd call Dr. Aurelius's office and ask for him, tell him everything he needs to know and make things easier on myself, it's as simple as that. Fear is what is holding me back because I don't know how he is going to react to the news. The last thing I want to do to him is cause him to flip out, erase the progress that he may or may not have accomplished. I could do it right here and now. I could pull my large body off the couch, waddle into the kitchen where a phone hangs on the wall and dial Dr. Aurelius's number. It's what I should do instead of sitting on the couch and watching fire eat the wood, but I don't do it, fear has me immobilized.

So I stay nested on the cushions with my body covering the entire couch, my hand perched on my stomach, unconsciously stroking my bump. I fall into a deep sleep moments later and the nightmares come hard and fast, and its only then I wish I had Peeta's arms around my body, holding me and chasing the darkness away. I'm not sure how long I had to watch the children burn, hear my sisters screams and see the faces of all the people I have killed. I wake up to the front door opening and then closing. The fireplace has burnt out and all that is left is tiny embers, trying to eat away at the ashes of the wood. I shift on the couch just enough to peer over the back and glance at my intruder, dread fills my body as I watch him take his boots off and blow hot air into his hands, trying to warm them up from the bitter cold. A second pair of feet enters and I catch sight of my mentor, a winter hat covering his shaggy head, his dirty ripped sweats hiding his body from the chilly weather, a flask is in his hand. I lay back down and pretend to be asleep as they enter the living room, closing my eyes tightly, hoping they don't realize that I am faking. I don't want to deal with Gale so my eyes stay glued shut.

"She asleep" Gale observed and places a hand on my forehead. He then runs the tips of his fingers through my hair. The contact makes me want to snap open my eyes and slap his hand away.

"No shit, the girl is exhausted and she has been through hell" Haymitch comments "Plus she is pregnant and probably shouldn't be screamed at or fought with"

Gale lets out a deep sigh "You heard?"

"Boy the whole district heard. You need to stop upsetting Katniss with your little confessions because if you don't you got to answer to me." Haymitch threatened.

Gale chuckles without humor and rolls his eyes, crossing his arms across his chest "What the hell is a drunken ass piece of shit like you going to do to me. I'm not scared of you or your pitiful threats. You're an old man, pathetic old, pitiful, useless man."

Haymitch merely chuckles at Gale's insults "Don't underestimate a Hunger Games Victor, even an older one because they just might let loose on you. Tell sweetheart I was here and that if she ever needs anything I'm right next door." I'm guessing Haymitch gives Gale the stink eye and then lets out a breathy laugh "But I'm pretty sure you wont relay the message, considering you went from a half-way decent boy to a corrupted love-sick asshole" and with that I hear the front door open and the close, leaving me alone with Gale.

"Asshole, mother fucker" I hear Gale mumble under his breath.

I still refuse to open my eyes and allow him to figure out that I'm awake and was listening to his conversation. It's not until his hand comes to a rest on my baby bump do I snap my eyes open and glare at him. I don't want his rough, jagged hands on my baby, it feels like he is tainting her with his fire.

"Hi, Catnip." Gale greets me like nothing has happened in the past 24 hours and I hate that he acts like he has done nothing wrong, and that he can just waltz right in here after our fight yesterday and touch my stomach.

"Get your hands off my daughter" I hiss.

He doesn't listen to me, just sits there with his open-palm flat against my belly. She suddenly stirs and begins kicking my side. I push Gale's hand of my stomach and sit up gently on the couch, letting out a painful sigh as she lodges her foot into my ribs, I nudge her, desperate for her to move her tiny foot away from my ribs, but its stay there and her position causes me all kinds of discomfort.

"You okay?"

She obviously doesn't like his touch and who could blame her.

"So you want to hear some good news?" He asks.

"Did you forget that I don't want you here at the moment." I say in a low threatening voice.

He waves me off "Get over that fight Catnip, now listen I think I may know someone who will be able to help deliver your baby, but you're not going to like who I have in mind or called."

"And who would that be?" I question.

Gale bites his lips and casts his eyes down to the ground, his cheeks redden at whatever memory is overtaking him. "Your mother actually" He glances up at me, teeth still between his bottom lip. Was I hearing this right, my mother, the woman who abandon me after the rebellion, left me for District 4, was coming here to deliver my daughter or son? Gale's answer to my question is very unlikely. My mother wasn't going to come back here for the daughter she left behind. The daughter who was viewed as a psychopath, the one who killed District 13 beloved President Coin, and went crazy. How bad was it going to be when the media found out that the Mockingjay was pregnant. Would they try to remove me from my baby's life? See me as an unfit mother? The scariest thought that crosses my mind is them taking her or him away from me and placing it into a foster home which would most likely be a Capitol family. The thought upset me and I placed a protective hand of my tummy. I was six months pregnant and no media has come to the District, just supply trains stopping and dropping goods off at what was left of our station. I could get away with three more months

"You're a real idiot, and did you explain to my mother that you killed her youngest daughter? "

Gale smacks the coffee table with his fist. "For fuck sake Katniss it was an accident, I didn't know she was there, okay. You can't hold me responsible, that's unfair."

I get up as quickly as I can from the couch, its hard considering the shape I am in but I managed to do it. She kicks hard at the sudden movement, and soon I'm pacing back and forth across the living room carpet, Gale's words angered me. He stands up as well and grabs hold of my arm, keeping me from pacing, his touch is a big mistake because I pull from his grasp and smack him hard in the jaw.

He cradles his wound "Katniss, what the hell" He groans.

"Don't touch me, and what's unfair is my little sister is dead and her murderer is in my living room, what's unfair is that I'm pregnant with a baby that was never supposed to be part of my life and I have to do this alone." I scream and tears are on their way out of my irises.

"Katniss your not alone in this, I keep telling you that over and over. I didn't kill Prim or those Capitol Children, I didn't know anything. I'm not going to sit here and have to call me a liar or a killer because you understand nothing. Are you blaming Beetee? Beetee Latier helped me design that bomb you do realize that right? Or do you just wanna blame me for everything. You want to focus on all the negative things about me. Not that I came back for you when Peeta didn't, I'm willing to raise another mans baby for you that's how much I love you, have you forgotten that we spent so much time together? What changed huh and don't tell me Peeta came into your life because we both know you'd never go for a townies. Please give me a chance I'll be a good boyfriend to you and a good father him."

"The answer is no, Gale, No and that's final. I don't love you, your not being father to my baby, Peeta is."

He rubs his temples in frustration and then snaps "Fuck Peeta! fuck him he fucking ruins everything. Don't tell me you love him because I know you don't. Fucker tried to kill you, Are you going to love someone who wants to snap your neck! No," He paces back and forth with his hands tucked behind his back and a foul look on his face, his anger is increasing by the minute. We are silent for a couple of minutes, pacing back and forth, mumbling something incoherent. He finally stops and faces me, shaking his head miserably.

"Pity fuck" He mumbles angrily.

I stare at him, eyebrow furrowed "What the hell is that supposed to mean"

"You pity fucked him and created a baby." He growls.

"How dare you!" I screech "You don't know the reason why I had sex with him. Get out I'm not going to spend my days fighting with you, we are not going to fight the whole entire time, now leave!"

He doesn't argue, just stomps across the carpet like a little kid and pulls on his boots, lacing them quickly, putting on a heavy jacket. I waddle my way over to the front door and fling it open motioning for him to get out. The air outside is chilly, cold and uncomfortable I shiver. He shoots a nasty glare at me, mumbles something that sounds like 'your making a mistake' and off he goes.

The shrill of the phone ringing jolts me awake a couple of hours later, I groan and lift my heavy body from the couch, struggling to pick up the phone that sits on a white wall in the kitchen. I pick up the receiver up from the base and place it by my left ear.

"Hello?"

"Katniss." Comes the smooth familiar voice of my mother. I don't know whether to be happy that she actually cared enough to call me after 6 months of not contact or angry at the fact that's she's only calling because I'm pregnant.

"Mom?"

"How are you, honey."

"Um fine" The awkwardness makes me so uncomfortable "Mother, why are you calling me?" It's a stupid question I know exactly why she is calling me and its thanks to Gale and his big mouth, if he told her about the baby who else has he told, endless people possible.

"There is a lot of things to talk about Katniss, but you have to answer one thing. Are you pregnant?"

I take a gulp I wont lie to my mother. I may hate her for everything she has done to Prim and I when dad died and when she abandon me to rot in District 12, never returning and taking care of the only daughter she had left, I'm not a liar.

"Yes I am, I'm six months pregnant." I admit.

My mother lets out a long sigh "Katniss, you're so young, Have you at least been checked by anyone?"

"Who the hell is here to check me?" I hiss "District 12 is in ruins, We barely have anything let along a doctor. I'm banished here, I haven't left my house in months, Your lucky I'm bathing and eating for this baby. This baby is what's keeping me alive."

"Katniss, you need help through this pregnancy and I'm on my way to help you, despite what I see or feel there. That is my grandchild and I'm going to make sure he or she comes safely into the world. Gale is not enough for you, I know its his baby too, but..." I cut her off immediately

"This is not Gale's baby."

She is so quiet on the other end that it's almost sounded like she has hung up the phone. My noble mother, packing her things, on her way her to take care of her grandchild. The fact that she has barely mentioned me stings, it's all about the baby with her. Did my mother think that this new baby was going to replace Prim? Did she think for a second that she was going to come into this baby's life so easily? She's wrong, why would I let her after she abandoned Prim and I, left us to starve and fend for ourselves, checked-out after our father died.

"Do you know who the father is?" Her words both anger and upset me, making me feel like some sort of slut that slept around during the rebellion, is that what she thought I did? The Mockingjay is a big slut that beds adoring fans.

"Of course I know who I've had sex with, mom" I snap.

"Alright, alright I'm sorry, Who is it?" I can hear the cringe that is in her voice and I know she doesn't like talking about sex and getting pregnant, especially not with her eldest daughter who has already done both.

"It's Peetas" I reply honestly.

"Peeta? You mean the Mellark boy, Your tribute partner? Peeta Mellark? He's the father?"

"Yes." My mother lets out a large sigh

"Oh No this will not do, not the boy who tried to kill my daughter"

To be continued...