Chapter 5

Lynn Everdeen

(Katniss's POV)

I sit stretched out on the couch when she arrives, entering through the front door with Gale trailing behind her. I can hear them exchange mindless chatter, a few chuckles here and there. Gale offers to take her bags to the spare room upstairs and she accepts, walking into the living room. My eyes remain lock on the fireplace in front of me and I watch as the flames engulf the wood. My mother has barely changed since the last time I saw here. She was still thin, gray hair mixing in with her blonde locks and the tired look she always wore was still there. Shocked is the only thing I'm feeling right now, she actually came back to the place that reminded her of everything she lost. My father's ghost was here and so was Prim's, We've lost absolutely everything our home and our family. My mother takes a deep breath and moves across the room, sitting in the pulse recliner that is a couple of inches away from the couch. We sit in an awkward silence for a couple of minutes before she decides to brave it and talk to me.

"Katniss, How are you?" She questions, rubbing her hands back and forth against each other, it becomes obvious that it is cold outside and she is trying to radiate heat from her body in order to warm up.

"Fine" I reply, glancing from the fireplace over to her. She has bags under her eyes which means she probably isn't getting enough sleep at night, neither am I, the nightmares are too much for me to handle and since I have to go to sleep in an empty bed they are twice as bad. That was the one good thing about Peeta he would comfort me with his arms, chase away the nightmares, making sure to guard me from the darkness that spread through my mind. He was always there for me when I woke up and fell asleep. The last good nights rest I had was when we made love for the first time, but now it was I either wake up screaming my head off, tearing at the sheets below me or barely sleep at all which was unhealthy for the baby because she could feel my stress, my emotions, everything that I was putting myself through. I wasn't healing at all. The only thing keeping me alive was this baby. I was only eating because of her, was only bathing to keep my body clean and healthy, other than eating, bathing and fighting with Gale I wasn't doing much with my life. I'd always decline the invites Gale gave me when he wanted me to go on walks with him, or help with the rebuilding which I couldn't do anyway I was pregnant and I didn't know what was dangerous to do and what was not. slipping and falling was a danger so that's why I decided to leave the walks out.

"Sorry it took longer for me to get here" Mom apologized "Trains are still closed, had to call in and order a hovercraft ticket. They been transporting people from place to place since the trains are down, tracks are destroyed. I've worked in 4 day in and day out, becoming a doctor. I think maybe you should have the baby there." She gets right to the point.

"Have you forgotten that I'm banned to 12, that I'm the crazy unstable girl who shot and killed District 13 president. Mother I don't want anyone knowing I'm pregnant. You know what's going to happen if the media gets wind of this?" I glare daggers in her direction and place a protective hand on my belly. She knows my touch by now and starts reacting to my rubbing. Her kicks are fierce and I smile to myself as she response to my touch.

"Katniss, I know the media will be tough to deal with once they figure out that you're pregnant and frankly I don't want them coming after my granddaughter, but..." I cut her off, angry at her for never even mentioning me. Was she only here because of my baby, that is a possibility. She didn't care that she had a daughter left, I might as well be dead too.

"Oh and you don't give a shit that they might come after me too. Of course not, you didn't come here for me did you? You came for my baby."

"Katniss, I want to help in every way I can okay. Your emotional and you wont be able to do this without help. You certainly can't give birth in this District. The baby wont survive in this type of environment sweetie. District 4 has a medical building, we don't have high-tech equipment like the Capitol, but its enough to help you through labor. Let me talk to the officials, see if they'll let you transfer District."

"Mom, they are not..." Tears are threatening to spill from my eyes. She is upsetting me with this talk and I begin to realize that I don't have much of an option here. She is right District 12 is nothing but a vast wasteland filled with dead bodies and horrifying memories. "I don't want them near my baby!" I hiss.

My mother sighs in frustration and taps her foot against the carpet "Katniss, you're being selfish here, think about the baby safety. If you give birth here where is she going to get cloths? Winter is coming and temperatures are going to drop, food will be scarce."

Tears are flying down my cheeks and the urge to run and lock myself in the upstairs room becomes an option, but I stand my ground against my mother. She does know what she is talking about and is right, I don't have clothes or food for my baby. I rub her as her kicks comes fierce and non-stop. She can sense my stress and sadness. My mother rises from the recliner and makes her way over to me, I fold my legs under my body and allow her to take a seat on the left cushion.

"There is something else you may want to consider and don't get angry for this suggestion." Mom takes a deep breath, resting a hand against my shoulder "You've been through hell honey okay, seen things, been through things a normal girl shouldn't have been through. You got pregnant too young way to young, your 17 years old Katniss and I don't think you're ready to take care of a baby."

I stare at her in disbelief "What are you saying? That I wont be able to take care of my child!"

"Katniss, All I'm saying is your stressed, you've been through a traumatic experience, a child right now is the last thing you need to worry about."

I clutch my fists and glare daggers at her "Nobody and I mean nobody is taking my baby away from me. Not you or the Capitol nobody. She is mine and Peetas and I'll be damned if you try to take her." I pull myself up from the couch despite the heavy burden that spreads through my body. My mother gets up with me, protesting, telling me not to get upset because it wasn't good for the child, but I ignore her and waddle my way to the stairs taking each one carefully, hanging onto the wooden railing as I ascend. Gale is at the top of the stairs leaning against a wall of the narrow hallway. He was eavesdropping the whole entire time. I brush past him, making sure to bump shoulders with him just lightly to let him know I'm pissed at him for calling her and bringing her here. He goes to say something but I don't catch it because I swing open my bedroom door, slamming it shut behind me and locking it, making sure neither one of them can get in. I'm so disgusted with my mother right now. How could she even consider trying to convince me to give my baby up? She is apart of Peeta and apart of me.

I throw myself on the cool sheets of the mattress, burying my head into the closest pillow and sobbing. My mother didn't give two shits about me, this was all for the baby. Did she think she could waltz right in here and try to convince me to leave 12, expose my unborn child to the Capitol? Better yet did she really think I'd give it up to her. I know what she was trying to say and that was: I may be an unfit mother, my experiences in the games and the war have completely traumatized me, broken the strong-wielded girl that I once was.

I place my hand on my belly and rubbed, tears in my eyes. She kicks and I smile "I wont let anyone take you I promise." I continue to cry and she continues to move "Oh...god I need your father right now, I need him so much. I love him, I love your father." I managed to cry until there were no tears left and until sleep managed to take me. The nightmares come hard and fast and when I wake up the sun is just about to set over the horizon. My stomach growls and I have no choice but to get up and fetch some food. I pray that she wouldn't be here by the time I waddled my way downstairs and into my kitchen. I don't want to talk to anyone or see anyone. Gale especially since this was all his fault. He brought her here, it pisses me off that he doesn't think before he acts, did he really think she wouldn't try to convince me to leave the District and have the baby somewhere else? He should have known she'd view me as an unfit mother and who was she to view me as that anyway. She was the woman who left her two daughter for death, sat there like a statue while Prim and I starved and fought for survival. She was the unfit mother not me. I'm going to do everything in my power for this baby. I tiptoe down the stairs, pausing when I heard voices come from the kitchen. To my demise they haven't left.

"She wont give that baby up, you do realize that right" Gale says.

"I know and I wouldn't want her to, but we don't have a choice Gale. She has been through hell, she needs to focus on healing. She is to traumatized to take care of it. I love my daughter I really do, but I want to be what's best for my grandchild. Look at this District the baby will never survive if its born here."

"You're right, Lynn. I care about Katniss a lot and this might kill her if you decide to take her baby away from her. She'd never forgive you."

"I don't want to take the child, it's just something that needs to be done. You know when she first confirmed that she was pregnant I thought you were the father, but then she said it was Peetas. Listen I know the boy is sick and all, but I cant help but have this feeling of resentment towards him, he tried to kill my daughter."

Does she know that she is standing face to face with the man responsible for Prim's death? Obviously not or she wouldn't be talking so kindly to him. How would she react if I plowed into the kitchen and told her that Gale designed a bomb that had a hand in Prim's death, but I don't move from the bottom of the stairs, listening to every word they were saying, and everything out of their mouths pissed me off.

"I know I feel the same way about him. I want to do everything in my power to keep him out of her life and out of that baby's life, you can count on that" Gale promises .

"Now that's not the right thing to do. I know I've said things about the boy, but he is still the father of my grandchild and as much as I dislike the idea of him being around my daughter and my grandchild it is his right."

I hear Gale sigh "He wont come back to her, That hijacking shit is too dangerous and as much as I hate to say this he wont come back if he thinks he might hurt her in any way, he...uh..." Gale groans in irritation "He loves her and so do I. I'm here for her now and I'm here for the baby. He's not here and he will never come back again."

"He will for his baby" Mother commented.

"Lynn, he doesn't even know." Gale reveals. "She hasn't contacted him to tell him."

I make myself known before they could continue their conversation. Both pairs of eyes are on my as I make my way into the kitchen and towards the fridge, the hunger is painful and I grab anything and everything I could. Everything from a jar of pickles to mustard. Gale and my mother are silent as they watch me place the food on the table and dig in.

"Sleep well?" My mother asks.

"Not really" I reply.

"When your done I'd like to check you out. see how the baby is doing. I brought some things with me. I want to listen to the baby's heartbeat"

"I really don't think I want you around her." I hiss.

"Katniss stop being like this"

"Your trying to take her away from me. I'm not the unfit mother here you are. You let Prim and I starve when dad died while you checked out"

My words hurt her a lot and tears start to form in her blue eyes. Good she deserves this after everything she put me and Prim through while we were growing up. Then, she comes back to 12 acting like nothing happened, suggesting all this shit to me about what I should do with my baby, giving her up is not an option and leaving District 12 to give birth isn't one either. I eat my food as quickly as I can and waddle my way into the kitchen, Gale sadly follows me and places an arm around my waist before I can sit down on my usual place on the couch. He gently turns me so we are face to face, and for a second it looks like he is going to kiss me, but he doesn't and I'm thankful.

"She's trying to help us through this."

"There is no us" I growl and shrug him off. "I want you guys to leave me alone."

"No, you're pregnant, you need to be around people who love you. Why would you want to be alone?"

"I don't I want and need Peeta with me right now. I need to tell him he is going to be a father, and we need to figure out what we are going to do."

Gale looks irritated and he snaps "FUCK HIM, HE"S GONE"

My mother steps into the living room and slaps Gale's shoulder "Do not yell at my daughter Gale Hawthorne."

"I'm so sick of hearing about Peeta. It's always Peeta this, Peeta that, Peeta, Peeta, Peeta. Get it through your goddamn head Katniss he fucked you and left, got what he wanted and ditched you. You're a mutt and a piece of fucking ass to him."

"Get out right now" My mother screams at him.

I managed to shrug out of his arms as he burst with jealous and anger, now I cower on the couch in tears while he hovers over me screaming and yelling telling me how much he hates Peeta, how if he ever sees Peeta again he was going to kill him. He cursed and yelled, even flipped my coffee table, breaking the large vase that sit in the middle that held fake flowers from the Capitol. Gale eventually does make his way to the front door, flinging it open and stalking out into the chilly air, not bothering to shut it out his way out. My mother shuts it gently for me and makes her way back over to the couch, gathering me in her arms while I cry. I never meant for any of this to happen. I never meant to kiss and lead Gale on like this, maybe if I would have gotten my feelings straight I wouldn't be in this mess. I wish I never would have kissed him in the woods or in 13, I wish I would have set things straight and told him he was nothing more than a friend to me. My mother is more shocked than anything at the fact that the noble Gale Hawthorne has a temper like that. I'm not sure how long she sat there holding me while I cry my eyes out, but the sun has set and darkness has spread across the District.

She lights a fire and makes me dinner while I sit there like a stiff board, peering into the flames like I always do. She brings me a plate of mashed potatoes and gravy with a side of bread, corn and fake turkey on the side. We eat in silence, neither one of us knowing what to say to each other. It's like this for a couple of minutes before my mother goes to say something, opening her mouth but then quickly closing it as a knock comes from the door. We look at each other, unsure if either of us should open it.

"If Gale thinks he is coming in this house at all tonight he is crazy" My mother states sternly.

"I'll answer it, if its him I'll send him away."

I rise from the couch and make my over to the front door, feeling the nervousness spread through every inch of my body. It came as a shock to me, seeing Gale burst like that, but it made me realize that he had nothing but fire inside him, fire and fire don't work well together. The brass knob turns as I fling the door open coming face to face with my visitor, ready to yell at him to go away, but as my gray eyes settle on the man in front of me my heart burst, tears start to flying down my cheeks and I place a hand over my mouth.

"Peeta"

"Hi"

To be continued...