Chapter 6
Return
(Katniss's POV)
"Hi" Peeta gently greets.
"You're back" I comment as tears of joy run down my face and soaks my cheeks. The baby dances at my excitement and kicks, Peeta remains motionless, his eyes bore into mine and I'm not sure what is going through his head or how meeting up after 6 months was going to effect the both of us, but he stands there, arms at his sides, lips in a tight line. He doesn't know what to do and neither do I. I don't know the boundaries or the condition he is in. He hasn't changed at all in the past 6 months except for the slight gain in weight and the small amount of muscle he has gain back. He looks tired and worn down from the trip, I'm also guessing that he doesn't sleep well because of the nightmares either, but other than that he is beautiful, amazing and I'm thankful that he just walked back into my life. My heart swells with love as I reach out to him and gently pull him into a hug, crushing him to me as far as the baby bump will allow. He is about to wrap his arms around my waist and pull me in, but he freezes as my large stomach presses up against his and the baby kicks at the first contact it has with its father. Peeta becomes as stiff as a board, gently pushing me back a few inches in order to get a good look at my prodding stomach, His mouth drops and breathing increases.
"You're pregnant?"
"Yes" I admit.
His eyes widen and he's not sure how to response or react. We stand in the doorway of the house, the cool breeze is causing both of us to shiver. I motion for him to come inside, sidestepping so he can get past me. He enters the warm house his eyes never leaving me as I close the door, locking the chilly air outside. He stands there tall, confused and nervous. There are so many things that we need to discuss, so little time. I don't know where to begin I thought for a fact that we'd be able to pick up right where we left off, but it's complicated. My mother comes around the corner from the kitchen and stops dead in her tracks as she catches sight of Peeta, her mouth slightly hanging open and disbelief filling her blue eyes. He nods in her direction and she nods back, never giving him a look of hatred like I expected she would. my mother doesn't hate Peeta, she pities him more than anything I'm guessing. She knows he is sick and that he can't help his actions or words, but that doesn't stop her from becoming weary of him.
"Hello, Peeta" She greets calmly.
"Mrs. Everdeen."
"Please call me Lynn." I hate my mothers fake attitude towards him, just the other day she was telling me it wouldn't do because he was the father of my baby, or the fact that he tried to kill me when she knew for a fact that he was sick and tortured. "What are you doing back here?"
Peeta bites his lip for a moment and scratches the back of his head, choosing his words very carefully "This is my home, ma'am and I came back to help rebuild it and help Katniss"
I turn to look at my mother, begging her with my eyes to leave us alone and let us catch up. I need to tell him that this baby is his and its important that I do it without my mother hovering over us. There are so many other things that needs to be discussed and I can't do it with her here, obviously Peeta feels the same way because he shifts uneasily and shoots her a look that says 'please Mrs. Everdeen I need to talk to her alone' he doesn't say it out loud like I wish he would, so I am stuck doing it.
"Mom I need to talk to Peeta alone, Can you do me a favor and check on Haymitch its been awhile since I've seen him last." The last time I've seen my mentor was a couple of days ago when he and Gale entered the house while I was on the couch pretending to sleep, they had somewhat of a harsh conversation with the result of Haymitch leaving and Gale calling him an asshole.
My mother is hesitant in leaving me alone with him, but she forcibly nods her head, shooting Peeta a warning look that says 'if you hurt my daughter or granddaughter I'll kill you.' She pulls her shoes on and a light coat, gives Peeta one last deadly look and is out the front door. My heart swells in my chest as I realize this is the first time since that night we were alone with each other. Peeta doesn't know where to begin all he can do is pace back and forth and stare at my large stomach in front of him. I can see the confliction in his eyes and all I want to do is erase it, help him understand what's going on and that we need to prepare for this. He is going to be a father to a beautiful baby, girl or boy I don't know, all I care about is that it's healthy, the gender can wait until its born. We are quiet for a moment, I watch him pace back and forth, lost for words.
"You need to tell me what's going on, Katniss" Peeta says finally stopping his pacing and turns to look at me.
"I'm pregnant what else is there going on. Nothing really besides the fact that I'm miserable, the baby has no clothes, food or diapers, nothing for when it is born."
Peeta takes a deep breath, crouches and presses his hands together for a moment "Is the baby mine?" I sigh in relief at his question he hasn't forgotten about our night in the capitol and neither have I, I will never forget the night we conceived our child.
"Yes the baby is yours. I haven't had sex with anybody but you" I tell him honestly.
He nods his head multiple times and places the nail of his index finger between his teeth and bites it off. I can't read him, I don't know what he is feeling, what he's thinking and its driving me crazy. Is he happy about the baby, upset, angry, regretful. This was a big secret to lay on someone and right now I don't know if he is able to handle the news. Peeta begins pacing again, mumbling something quietly under his breath, I don't quiet catch the words. He is like that for at least 20 minutes, until I had enough of his pacing and mumbling.
"Please stop Peeta. Say something to me" I beg.
"What do you want me to say, Katniss? I don't know what to say other than why didn't you tell me sooner, like when you found out. Your not in the early stage of pregnancy are you?"
I shake my head "I'm six months pregnant, I found out a couple of weeks after they dumped me off and after we had sex. I couldn't tell you Peeta."
"Why couldn't you tell me? Because I was crazy right, because I wanted nothing more than to hurt you?"
"Please lets not do this please. I'm tired of fighting with people, Gale has been giving me a massive headache and is putting me and the baby under so much stress and now my mother want to take him."
Peeta frowns at this "What? Is that why she is here, to take our child."
"She wants me to have the baby in either District 4 or the Capitol, but the only way to do that is to get my exile sentence revoked, that will alert the media, cameras will be all over the place and Panem will know about this baby. I don't want that for her I don't, then my mother said something about me not being able to take care of the baby, I'm pretty much to unstable to handle her. Peeta I know this is a lot to take in, but please I need you here for our baby. She needs her daddy"
"Katniss I'm going to help with the rebuilding, move back here and all, but my hijacking is still lingering. I'll be here as much as I can be, but I don't want to hurt you or the baby. I'm going to do the best I can. I came back here because its my home and I came back for you."
"Do you still love me? Are you still the boy with the bread?" The question just slips out of my mouth on its own. I need to know if somewhere deep down the boy with the bread still lingered, the one who announced to the entire nation that he was in love with me. The one who lost his leg for me and would take a bullet to the chest if it meant I'd be safe. Peeta Mellark, the boy with the bread. The boy I fell in love with, the father of my child. Peeta is so quiet for a long moment, he rubs his temples, the back of his neck and crouches placing his head between his knees as if he is getting light-headed.
"Yes I do still love you, but I cant do anything about it right now. My brain is fragile and abnormal, Aurelius suggested I don't do anything but talk to you."
"Can I have a simple hug?" I bite my lip holding back tears. He sighs heavily but to my surprise moves across the carpet and gently takes me in his strong arms, gently crushing me to him. I inhale his heavenly scent and bury my head in his chest, being in his arms made me feel safe and secure like nothing could ever hurt me again. My large belly touches his flat one and once again the contact makes her move and kick at her father. A small smile appears on Peeta's face as he feels the tiny kicks against his own stomach. He takes his hand that was curled around my back and place it against my stomach, his smile turns into a grin as he feels her move inside me for the first time. I start at him in 'awe', witnessing a father feeling his baby kick for the first time is a very touching sight. Oh how I want to lean in and kiss him so passionately that he wont be able to think straight, but I don't and it's because both of us have to take it easy.
"She knows who her daddy is" I smile as tears of joy runs down my face. Peeta's hands stay planted on my stomach, he takes them away when she dies down and probably falls asleep. Peeta takes a step back, only grabbing onto my hand to lead me over to the couch and help me sit down to rest. Words cant describe as to how grateful I am to have him back into my life. He came back to me. I knew he would, fuck what Gale had said about him not loving me, about him having sex with me for the hell of it. He sits down on the center cushion and I take the right one.
"I still don't understand why you didn't tell me." He frowns.
"I was scared Peeta, so damn scared at the fact that I was going to be a mother. I panicked. The last time I saw you was the night we had sex and oh my god that was amazing I loved every second of it. You were so gentle, so incredibly gentle with these." I pause to pick up his hands and lace them together, his hands are cold and chilled, He's probably still heating up from his trip through the elements. "I loved every touch and thrust you gave me that night, but I was scared when I woke up and found you gone, it was like the passionate, incredible sex we had didn't mean anything to you, and then when I found out I was pregnant and that there was no doubt in my mind that you were the father because you were the only one I've ever had sex with. I was scared shitless, I thought the boy with the bread hated me because the Capitol poisoned his mind. I was scared and am still scared. How are we going to do this Peeta? How are we going to care for our baby." I start to sob and its only then he takes me into his arms carefully and holds me.
"Shh, don't cry I'll think of something. I'm back and I'm not going to leave again, okay. We got a long road ahead of us and I want us to take it slow. I'm not going to let your mother or anyone take our baby. I'm going to do everything and anything to help get ready, I'll dump my entire Victor's money into this baby if I have to"
I laugh, wiping away the tears as they fall "Stupid me forgot all about the Victor's cash that lasts us the rest of our lives. I could have ordered baby clothes from the capitol instead of feeling sorry for myself. Idiot me, but that will probably give us away."
"See that's a start. Everyone in Victor Village has one of them high-tech computers from 3, so why not use it and browse, put in a private order." Peeta suggests.
"I've been under a lot of stress lately, between mother and Gale, and Haymitch who never shows up. I really think he is avoiding Gale like the plague. Gale was mean to him. I didn't even think to do that"
"Whoa back up? What's Gale been doing to you?"
"I just don't want him near the baby when she is born is all and I don't want him near you."
Images of Gale flipping the coffee table over out of rage which my mother straightened it up before she left, the fire in his eyes and that hatred in his body every time Peeta's name was mentioned. Jealousy was a dangerous thing to deal with, Especially someone like Gale who was capable of doing anything in order to get what he wanted and what he wanted right now was me and the baby. He was going to flip out once he caught wind of Peeta's return, he was going to be pissed at the fact that Peeta was in my house and had every intention of taking care of me. Peeta wasn't going to leave my side again, he was here now for me and the baby, nobody was going to take him away from me again. We got a second chance at making things right again and I was going to take it. We still had his hijacking to deal with but that was far from my list of things to worry about. I knew if he tried hard he'd be able to control the emotions and memories that flashed through his mind.
"If that's what you want then I'll make sure he doesn't come near you or the baby" Peeta promises.
"Peeta, I'm scared of him. He flipped out today just at the mentioning of your name. My mother was even shocked at his behavior, I felt as if he was going to hurt me in some way."
"I'll kill him if he hurts you, like literally kill him" Peeta hisses.
"It wont come down to that. I guess we have a lot of work to do. I'm going to figure out how to fire up that computer upstairs. Are you going to be staying long?"
"Yeah for as long as you need me."
My heart swells and I smile at him. "I love you" The words are automatic, unstoppable and they are true. "I love you so much and I'm so thankful you came back into my life, into this baby's life. I don't care if your hijacked, I love you" Last time I told him that he was on top of me, making love to me like it was the last thing he'd ever do.
"I love you too." Peeta returns and hugs me tightly. I knew my boy with the bread was still somewhere deep down, he was in there and he was fighting to get better. He could do it, Peeta Mellark was strong.
"Can I have a kiss? Please" I beg for one.
Peeta hesitates for a second, but then fits his mouth into my driving me into a passionate kiss. It feels so good to be kissed by him again, I don't ever want to pull away. Peeta cuffs the back of my head deepening the kiss and my stomach flutters not from the baby, but because there are so many butterflies flitting around. Oh god I don't want him to stop. We kiss and kiss, until he breaks away for air.
"Oh god I love you so much" I pant.
He doesn't say anything just fits his lips back to mine and continues to kiss me. My arms are around his neck, my fingertips are gliding through his blonde silky locks, holding him in place, begging him to keep kissing me which he does. I don't know how long we sit there kissing each other but it feel good, our reunion is perfect, he knows about the baby, he doesn't hate me, he loves me and he swears to keep Gale away from me. We keep kissing and it's not until the front door gently opens do we break away and gaze at our intruder. My body shakes with fear as he steps into the house, his eyes peering in every direction, as soon as his eyes land on us, there is fire in his gray orbs and the door slams.
"Fucking Seriously" Gale Snaps.
To be continued...