A/N: I am REALLY not sure what the think of this one. I really like Ashley, but she's just so dang hard for me to write. I just hopeI did her justice here.
Next update will be VERY soon; Lucas' chapter is already done.
Enjoy!
Ashley is pissed.
Stupid brass, stupid Council, stupid Shepard, stupid, stupid, STUPID! If she has to deal with anymore BS from any of them, her head is going to explode. No one is listening, no one even seems to care about the sacrifices that Shepard made to save their sorry behinds (and why the hell did she have to go back in there alone, anyway? All of this could've been prevented if the idiot had had the sense to bring some backup!)
Ashley keeps her anger to herself, however. Everyone around her is struggling to keep themselves from falling apart. She and Garrus are forced to run damage control for the rest of the crew, ensuring that they don't have to grieve for Alena alone. At the funeral, after her speech, while Garrus goes off to comfort Tali and Liara, Ash helps their human teammates. She lets Kaidan cry on her shoulder, speaks as kindly and gently with Joker as she can realistically manage under the circumstances, and allows Lucas to lean against her for support.
She does what she can for them, but she's only one woman - and they are barely holding together as it is.
Ashley wonders how Alena did it, staying so calm and so strong for everyone else on the team. It's a struggle, being a shoulder to cry on. For the first time, Ash truly appreciates what her mother went through right after her dad's death - bearing that oppressive mantle of leadership draped over her shoulders, demanding her to stand tall when all she wants to do is break down and cry herself. But she can't do that. She has to keep moving forward, for everyone's sake. She may have lost a friend over Alchera; but if she falls apart, she'll lose a lot more than that.
After the initial surge of grief over the commander's passing, the public begins to question Shepard's validity at every turn. Ashley watches in disbelief as the Council casually tears down the image of the woman who saved them. They write Shepard off as a lunatic and shove her to the side, like she hadn't prevented a galactic catastrophe, like she hadn't saved trillions of lives when she destroyed Sovereign… and Ashley wants nothing more than to punch them in their pompous, hypocritical faces.
How dare they? How DARE they disrespect her friend like that?!
Lucas agrees with her, naturally, but that doesn't make it any more difficult.
"That's politicians for you," he remarks dryly one day, while the two of them are sitting together by the edge of the lake up in the Presidium. "They beg and beg for you to help them and then completely screw you over once they've got what they want."
Ashley scowls and flicks a little piece of metal into the water. "I hate politicians," she grumbles.
Lucas laughs and lays back in the grass, tucking his arms behind his head. "You and the rest of the galaxy," he says with a smirk.
Despite his apparent mirth, Ash can see the furrows between his eyes. He clearly has something weighing heavily on his mind. She doesn't even need to wonder what it is.
She lays down beside him and stares up the "sky", examining the shapes of the artificial clouds with vague interest. To be honest, the whole damn Citadel annoys her. It feels like it's designed specifically to make you forget that the rest of the galaxy exists, and she's not particularly fond of that illusion. Just another reason why she hates the Council so much - it's like they want to make people think that there's absolutely nothing wrong and forget that there are more important things in the universe than catching the next Blasto movie. It's just so frustrating.
"You think Alena's up there?" Lucas asks suddenly. Ash glances at him briefly. Smiling softly, she reaches over and squeezes his hand.
"I know she is," she says gently. "We'll see her again, Skipper. I can feel it."
He turns to look at her. His eyes are wet. Nevertheless, he manages a watery smile.
"Yeah…" he trails off.
Ashley moves closer to him, wrapping one arm loosely around his torso. He rests his cheek on the top of her head and sighs heavily. Normally she wouldn't risk doing this in public, but he needs it right now. Besides, she's wearing her hair down and he hasn't shaved in a few days, not to mention that they're both dressed in civilian clothes at the moment, so it'll be harder for people to recognize them than on a normal day.
Ash closes her eyes and breathes in deeply. So maybe everything's going to hell and the Council's treating her friend's reputation like shit, maybe she's still more than a little pissed with the authorities and more than ready to crack some heads together if the need arises, and maybe there's a chance that she and Lucas will be spotted cuddling on the lawn and get court-martialed for fraternization, but honestly, right now she can't bring herself to care.
As messed up as things are at the moment… today, life is good.
I'm really hoping that this seems in character. I figured that out of all of the crew members, Ash would probably be the best at keeping her cool and pulling herself together. She seems to have a hardy personality like that. I can't really picture her falling apart easily. If she seems OOC… sorry, I tried my best.