Happy Friday!
Thanks to the guest for reviewing. And for those of you unaware, part of this chapter was posted a few days earlier on my tumblr. I made a tumblr page for this story. The link is in my profile, or just look for rileyparkerneedstoshutup on tumblr.
I knew it wasn't any of my business, but I still couldn't help but feel somewhat bad for Finn. Yeah, he freaking massacred a village, but he did it for Clarke. Not saying that's a good reason to kill, but she could've at least spoken to him. Or even have looked in his direction.
Murphy and I had went back to camp, expecting to be locked up again. Instead to our surprise, we were told that all our crimes were pardoned. June was pissed because they weren't being friendly to Breton, but I doubt she expected them to accept him. They kept him locked in a room for the majority of the time, and therefore June stayed in that room by his side.
I saw Sterling around camp every once in a while, always walking with Mel. I would've found it adorable if it hadn't meant that he wasn't hanging out with me. I mean, I saved the dudes life. You'd think he'd at least say thanks, or something.
Murphy and I were beyond ecstatic about being pardoned, and I was in such a good mood that I even helped Murphy recover Monty's still from the dropship. Within two days we were making our own alcohol. Not really the smartest thing for two teens to being doing, but I mean. We both had nearly died at least five times since landing on earth. We deserved some alcohol.
We had kept to ourselves for the most part. But I couldn't help but wonder where Clarke and Co. were on making plans to go into mount weather. Apparently, Breton was right. Mountain people from under mount weather had taken our people.
I had nearly jumped Clarke to find out if Reed was okay. She told me Reed appeared to be happy enough for the time being, and that Monty was with her. Thank god, am I right? At least they had each other. Besides, if I knew anything about Reed, it was that she made friends in odd places. Maybe it was because she was friendly. At least that's what I had to keep telling myself whenever I thought about her; that she was okay and everything was fine.
After dinner one night, Murphy and I were left to our own devices. At this point I already had three drinks, so everything was just dandy in my mind. I wanted to giggle, about nothing. Murphy and I walked around the campsite, and my eyes laid on Clarke and Finn sitting together awkwardly.
"Look." I said, whacking Murphy in the stomach with my free hand that wasn't holding a drink. He snorted and moved away from where my hand was before looking over. He chuckled at Clarke and Finn sitting like that together.
"They look like they're having fun." Murphy said sarcastically.
"Let's diffuse the tension." I exclaimed, having way too much confidence whilst drunk. I started heading over to them before Murphy even responded, and I looked back for a moment while walking to see him shake his head before taking another sip and following me. He smiled at me, and the world felt right.
Not to say the world hadn't felt right before then. I was drunk though, so leave me alone.
I plopped myself down in the chair next to Clarke, probably way to hard. But everything and everyone seemed fine to me. Clarke looked at me confused, and then rolled her eyes when she noticed Murphy walk around the table and sit next to Finn.
"Check it out. Salvaged Monty's still from the dropship." Murphy said as he lifted his cup while smirking, and then taking another swig.
"The guy sure knew how to liquor." I retorted as I looked down inside my cup, hastily swirling it around for my own amusement. Yes, in retrospect I know now that I hadn't said a complete sentence. I was drunk, okay?
"Now, I guess you know, if they could just salvage Monty." Murphy joked, and I snorted before laughing probably a little bit too much.
"It's funny because it's true." I said as I leaned on the table for a moment, looking at Clarke next to me. She hadn't found it funny, and when I turned my gaze to Finn I noticed he hadn't either.
They needed to learn how to laugh at life, I swear those two were more serious than a heart attack. Which I've heard is a very serious cardiac situation that should not be taken lightly.
"Okay." Murphy said, trying to clear the awkward tension. "You tell her we're cleared?" Murphy asked as he looked at Finn. Finn looked down before shaking his head.
"Pardoned of all crimes, even the dumb earth ones." I added, raising my cup happily. I hadn't ever really done anything on earth that required the extra pardoning. Besides poisoning someone, and I guess by not telling them Murphy killed Connor I became an accomplice. So I guess I had needed that extra pardoning.
"I'll cheers to that." Murphy said as he raised his cup towards mine, and we hit our cups together before bringing them back to our mouths and taking another drink. Someone really should've already cut me off at that point.
"We did what he had to do." Finn whispered, looking sadly at Clarke. "I've got to go." He continued as he jumped out of his seat and stalked away.
Murphy whistled, and I just let my mouth drop as I looked from Finn leaving back to Clarke.
"Trouble in paradise?" Murphy asked, and I couldn't stop myself from smiling and looking at him. He was also smiling, and seemed to be enjoying himself as much as I was.
"Just because they pardoned both of you, doesn't mean I have to." Clarke snapped bitterly as she avoided our eye contact and looked into the distance where Finn had once been.
"Meow." I whispered, bring the cup close to my mouth. "You don't need to be so catty." I took another sip as Murphy laughed at my remark.
"Clarke." Raven said as she walked towards us, and sat down in the spot Finn had just left. "Beat it you two." She added, not even looking at us.
"Well then. Have a good one." Murphy mumbled as he got up from his spot.
I didn't feel like moving, and just smiled from Raven to Clarke as Murphy smiled and walked around the table towards me. He grabbed the hand that was on the table and yanked me up towards him. "We're not welcome anymore, dumbass." He whispered to me as he let go of my hand, snaking his arm around my waist and pulling me away from the table.
"You're not welcome anymore." I snapped back, resting my head on his upper arm and letting him lead me away.
"Well, you're not wrong." Murphy replied, looking around at the disgruntled people as we made our way back into Alpha station. They all hated us, because in their minds we were still criminals.
"I wanted to hear about mount weather." I whined, and stopped walking apburtly, lifting my head away from Murphy as I realized how annoying I sounded. Murphy's hand dropped away from my waist. "Did you get me drunk?" I asked and he snorted, finishing his cup and grabbing mine, finishing it in one swig as well.
"If I had been trying to, I'd say I accomplished it." Murphy teased, looking me up and down.
"What are you trying to pull?" I asked as he stacked our two cups together and grabbed my hand, dragging me back to our room.
They had given us a room, which was more like a broom closet. It had a bunk bed, which I had claimed the top bunk. That was literally all there was in the room, and honestly there was not enough room for much of anything else.
"I don't need to get you drunk to pull anything." Murphy reminded me as he dropped my hand and opened the door to our room, stepping aside to let me walk through. I walked through hesitantly.
We had been slightly distant since we had gotten back to camp a few days ago. Maybe it was because we had both been so tired, but even when we had the energy we just went on silly journey's through the woods, him watching as I ran around ahead.
No funny business, just us acting like the kids we both were before we got arrested. I had always loved running on the ark, there was something so freeing about it. Murphy had seemed to enjoy watching me run around, probably because I grinned like an idiot when I ran. We were in a bizarre position where we kept calling each other best friends, but it would randomly take a turn for something more. And each time, before it could really turn into something more, it stopped.
"Oh, Really? Then why haven't you?" I remarked as I stopped in the middle of the room, contemplating whether or not I could manage climbing up to the top bunk. The words had slipped out of my mouth before I could even understand what I had been saying.
"Oh I'm sorry." Murphy snapped back sarcastically as he closed the door behind him. "I didn't realize I was supposed to steal your innocence the first chance I got." He said as he walked around me to stand a few feet away facing me.
I could feel my face heat up as he smirked, and I looked down trying not to laugh, or cry. I was really drunk.
"I don't want to have this conversation right now." I realized, my face feeling so warm under his gaze as I continued staring down at the floor between us.
Murphy chuckled as he took a few steps closer to me, the gap between us shrinking. "You're so dumb sometimes." He whispered, and I could feel his breath on my face as he stopped only inches away from me.
"Hey." I hissed, looking up at his smirking face. "You're as dumb as me, jerk face."
He chuckled, looking down at the floor for a moment as he nodded before looking back up at me. "I know." He said, a smirk coming back onto his face.
We stared at each other, and it felt like both hours and only seconds went by before he closed the gap completely between us. One of his hands flew to my neck as I reached and wrapped my arms around his neck. His other hand went to my lower back, pressing my body into his as he pulled my head towards his, our lips colliding.
I didn't want the kiss to ever end, but as it always seemed to, it ended too quickly. I tried catching my breath as I felt him let go of me, and I unwrapped my arms away from his neck as well. "Go to sleep, Rhy." He whispered as he took a step away from me.
"Or what?" I retorted, turning away from him as I tried taking my boots off. He was right, I needed to go to sleep. Before I made a fool of myself or something.
"Or I'll steal your innocence." Murphy joked again, surprising me so much I dropped my boot on the floor and spun around to look at him. He started laughing at me when he saw the surprised look on my face, enjoying every second of teasing me.
It was clear that he enjoyed making sexual jokes just to startle me. But whether or not he meant them was another story entirely.
"Fuck you, Murphy." I snapped as I threw my other boot off in annoyance. I was drunk, and kind of felt like my heart was being toyed with.
"Well, that's what I'm getting at Rhy." He continued playing, shaking his feet out of his boots, and turning off the lights before starting to climb up the bunk bed. I could feel my face getting red again as I watched him take my bed. "Take the bottom Rhy, you can't climb up here." He finished as he sprawled himself on my bed. I hadn't moved, and just stood there next to my dropped shoes.
I had wanted to prove him wrong, but I didn't think I could take the embarrassment either way. Either I tried and didn't get up the bed's ladder, and he laughed, or I got up there and he would make a joke about me crawling into bed with him. It was a lose-lose situation for me, and I quietly grumbled as I threw myself on his bed.
After a few moments of being moody, I let myself enjoy his scent surrounding me. I crawled under the covers, smelling his pillow. I had just been about to fall asleep nice and peacefully when I heard Murphy mumble, "Just how I like my girls." He whispered, and I could tell he was about to say something to bug me again, "On the bottom."
A moment of silence went through the air as he waited for me to respond. And boy, did I respond. "Shut up Murphy!" I yelled, bringing my legs up and kicking the bottom of the mattress. He erupted in laughter as I shook his bed with my feet.
Once he finally stopped laughing, I stopped pressing my feet into his mattress. I turned over to face the wall and closed my eyes. Once again I was nearly lulled into sleep when Murphy whispered, "Sleep well, Rhy." I smiled at his words, and let the good buzz of being drunk wash over me and I drifted into sleep.
Clarke and Co. left the next morning, and didn't come back till nightfall. When they returned, they also had Jaha. Which really confused me, because as far as I had known they left him up on the ark to die.
Murphy and I avoided any conversation about the night before. I think we were both too scared of how the other would react to even brush the topic. We had both had a little too much to drink the night before. I don't think either of us really knew how to go from being best friends to something more, and were both too afraid to find out. Or even if the other person genuinely wanted to. It was all a hot mess, really.
Everyone in the camp avoided us like the plague except June, but June was also an outsider in their mind. While Clarke and Co. had been gone that day, June had tried to teach anyone who would listen how to speak grounder, but it ended up with only her and I sitting at a table. Even Murphy didn't want to listen, and instead went off to do whatever guys do alone. I don't know, don't ask.
That night after we had seen Jaha; Murphy and I had laid in our beds for a long time. Not really saying anything of much importance, simply coming up with bizarre ways that Jaha could've landed himself on earth. There was something so soothing about looking up at the ceiling and hearing him speak. After all the shit we had been through, we were still the same two kids are heart. I mean, we were really fucked up now, and dealing with like hormonal urges, but that's beside the point.
Now that Jaha was back, he appeared beyond ready to continue being chancellor again. I didn't really trust him, but then again I never had. The asshole locked me up in the skybox for trying to feed myself. The next morning after everyone had eaten breakfast, Jaha called us all to attention. I hated being told be pay attention to someone.
"I think you've all heard the rumors, and unfortunately it's true. The grounders are coming." Jaha said, and my stomach dropped. No one had told me these rumors. I had thought we were still trying to get our friends out of mount weather. I turned my head to look at Murphy, and it was obvious no one had told him either.
We were always the last ones to know what's going on.
"We have a difficult decision to make. Thankfully chancellor Jaha has found his way back to us, and we're discussing all options." Abby said from beside Jaha, giving him skeptical glances every now and then.
"But to be safe, you need to pack. Now. Whatever you can carry, we may need to leave at a moment's notice." Jaha said confidently, and I watched Abby tense up.
I groaned. "I don't have jack shit to pack. This is dumb." I whispered to Murphy as I looked over at him.
"Are you worried about the grounders?" He whispered back, looking into my eyes and waiting for a reaction.
"I'm just about always worried about the grounders." I admitted, looking away from his intense stare.
"A city of light. It's across the dead zone." Jaha said, and I frowned.
"Where do you think he hears about this shit?" Murphy asked, nudging me slightly to get me to smile.
"The voices in his head, probably." I replied shrugging and nudging him back.
"I've got faith." Jaha said, trying to be a preacher or something.
"And I've got too much time on my hands." I whispered, raising a brow at Jaha. I still had no clue what I was going to do that day, besides worry over the grounders.
"And I've got to deal with you." Murphy added, leaning into me again so I would look at him.
"Don't act like you're upset about that." I retorted, looking up at him, my brow still raised. He smiled at me and I felt his hand make its way into mine. I couldn't help but smile at the gesture before looking back at Jaha.
"Did we come all this way to die tomorrow?" Jaha's motivational speeches were a lot like Bellamy's; really boring and not even remotely applicable to me.
"I never intended to come all this way." I whispered, shaking my head. It hadn't been my choice to be thrown in a dropship a few months ago.
"No decision has been made." Abby interjected, glaring slightly at Jaha.
"It sure sounds like Jaha's decided." Murphy whispered, and I nodded before letting out a deep sigh.
During the day, Clarke and Co. left again. Murphy had been given a gun and told to do rounds, so yet again I ended up all alone. I ended up finding June, and we commiserated together. They apparently had nearly tortured Breton, and she had to watch. From what I could gather, she was having a really bad week.
Ever since that day when she had pulled me off the ground and ushered me into the dropship, worried about my wellbeing after Murphy had been nearly hanged, I found myself liking her more and more. She may have had a sketchy-at-best choice in men, but she really had a heart of gold. Such a shame that the kindest hearts have to go through some of the worst shit.
Breton had taught her how to use a sword to protect herself, and she was more than happy to distract herself all day by teaching me. I figured I would need all the practice I could get if the grounders really were coming.
Clarke made quite the entrance that night, being escorted by two grounders on horses. To make matters even more concerning, the grounders didn't leave. Apparently, they wanted Finn to pay for his crimes. Sad, but understandable. He had massacred kids and old dudes.
Raven didn't seem to agree however, and ended up punching someone in the face over it and had to be practically carried away. Clarke and Co. were nothing if not cheap entertainment.
I had found Murphy finishing his shift a little later after the fight. He seemed happy to see me, and quickly ushered me away from the camp's walls.
"There are thousands of grounders out there somewhere." He mumbled as his fingers intertwined with mine. "I got to stare at trees for the whole day, my eyes fucking hurt."
"June taught me how to fight with a sword." I said excitedly, watching his face for a reaction. He smiled and looked at me with those blue eyes that did weird things to my heart.
I was starting to think I had a heart murmur or something, it couldn't be right to feel this way around someone. Sometimes around Murphy I felt like my heart was going to explode out of my chest. But it hurt even worse when he wasn't around. It was the worst, actually.
"And how did you do with a sword, gonna beat up any more grounders?" Murphy teased, his smile growing slightly.
"Well, I can safely say that swords probably aren't my thing." I hesitantly said as I looked away nervously. I had accidentally wielded it wrong and ended up almost hitting my neck with the sharp end.
"How badly did you mess up?" Murphy asked through his own laughter, squeezing my hand even tighter.
"I almost slit my own throat." I mumbled, and Murphy's laughter died down quickly. He stopped walking, tugging me to face him.
"Are you okay?" He asked, tilting his head down to get a better look at my throat as his free hand went to touch my neck.
"I said almost." I hissed back as I quickly pushed his hand away from my neck. "It's going to take a lot more than my own stupidity to kill me."
Murphy smiled as he looked down at the ground for a moment, and then looked back at me. "I sure hope so."
"Don't worry. June is going to have me try arrows next. At least then it'll be hard for me to shoot myself." I huffed, before grinning and adding, "Other people on the other hand, watch out."
"What is it with you and that girl?" Murphy asked as I turned and we continued walking.
"She picked me up off the ground after you got nearly got hanged." I admitted, and I felt him go tense next to me, squeezing my hand tighter. "I understand her. I know what it feels like to have a friend you'd do anything for." I continued as I looked down at the ground.
"You astound me sometimes, Rhy." Murphy whispered, giving my hand another squeeze.
"Damn right, I'm astounding." I whispered back, looking at him as he chuckled at my response and shook his head. We continued walking outside, enjoying each other's company when I spotted Finn.
Finn no longer had crazy eyes, but damn was he depressed. I couldn't help but feel somewhat bad for him. He had just wanted Clarke back. Murphy noticed me staring at Finn, and our direction of walking changed towards him.
"Hey, man." Murphy said as he dropped my hand and plopped himself on the metal framing next to Finn. "Byrne actually gave me a gun. Guess we really are screwed, huh?" He said as he motioned to the gun swung over his back. Finn didn't respond, and Murphy sighed. "Look, we kicked their asses last time. We'll do it again."
"We didn't." I whispered, and Murphy looked at me exhaustedly. "What? It's true. Raven was the one who set them on fire."
"And a lot of people died." Finn added morosely, making me regret even saying anything. Damn could that boy take a conversation and make it even more depressing.
"That's how war works." I whispered looking down at the ground awkwardly and biting my lip about how awkward the conversation had become.
Luckily I didn't have to stand around awkwardly as I heard the crunching of ground near me. I looked up to see Clarke and Bellamy swaggering over to us, their eyes trained on Finn.
"We're reinforcing our defenses." Bellamy said as they came to a halt. "Doubles on the perimeter. No ones getting past that wire."
Damn Bellamy and his confident speeches.
"I'll see where they're thin." Finn mumbled as he stood up and went to walk away. Bellamy quickly blocked his path.
"No, you should head inside. B corridor would be easier to defend, if it comes to that." Bellamy said, trying to come up with a good excuse as to why Finn should be inside.
"I'm not going to hide." Finn retorted, looking from Bellamy to Clarke.
"Right now, we have to think about keeping you safe. I'm going to talk to Lincoln and Breton." Clarke said, her confidence wavering slightly. This whole conversation was clearly awkward for everyone involved, let alone Murphy and I.
"Come on." Bellamy commanded, and Finn sighed before nodding and following Bellamy inside. Clarke slowly left after them.
"Have any orders for us, Princess?" Murphy yelled to Clarke as he stood up, walking the few steps to stand next to me.
"Stay away from me." Clarke hissed as she turned to look at us.
"I was just trying to be helpful." Murphy replied, and I didn't need to see his face to know he was frowning.
"You both were with him at the village." Clarke said, pointing at us.
"We tried to stop him." Murphy replied sourly.
"Not hard enough." Clarke spat back, turning herself and starting to leave again.
"Screw you, Clarke. You weren't there with Finn while he was looking for you." I cringed slightly at how weird that sentence sounded, "He was fucking psycho."
"Yeah." Murphy piped in, "You wanna start blaming people, Clarke? He was out there looking for you."
Clarke had stopped in her tracks at Murphy's words, but didn't look back. She quickly started walking again, storming into the building.
I let out a deep exhale as I continued to look at where Clarke had been. She hadn't felt the fear we did. She didn't know how close Finn had been to accidentally shooting one of us. Murphy stood next to me in silence, and I knew he was probably going through every scenario in his head too.
Unease only grew between us as lights started going up in the trees around camp, and creepy chanting was started echoing through the air.
"Murphy." I whispered as I looked around at all the trees, and the lights. "I think I'm really scared now."
"Don't be." He replied, but I could hear that slight quiver in his voice. He was scared too. So instead of trying to reassure me, he enveloped me in his arms. My arms wrapped around him as well as I buried my face in his chest.
I think we both needed that. We didn't really have any friends to pat us on the back and tell us it'd be fine. Or give us a hug. Just about everyone in camp acted more like they'd stab us before hugging us. So, just as we had when we were kids, we became each others support for everything. I knew I could rely on Murphy, and he knew he could rely on me. And that was enough for both of us.