Uploaded: 04/05/2016
Summary: Seirin though they had the single sane Miracle. Until Kagami spilt his milkshake…
Thank you to the following for the reviews on Incident 5.
Guest; Anonymousreader; Naveesha; belncaz; ScarletAkiChin; Daygon Yuuki; Kurokshiroryuu; Cafuchi; Azure Kuroyuki; Akakuro Karmagisa; Rin1730.
This Oneshot has now become a multi-chaptered series of non-chronological 'Incidents'. Please enjoy :)
Spilt Milk(shake)
Incident 7 – Kagami
"Moshi Moshi~!"
"Kise!? Kise you've gotta help us!"
"Kagamicchi-?"
"Oh God! Shh! Shh! He'll hear us!"
"What? Kagamicchi? What's going on?"
"~Kagami-Kun~"
Kise dropped his phone. His hands were trembling and eyes impossibly wide. He had not heard that voice using that particular tone in nearly a year. To this day he still had nightmares…
"Oi, Kise?" Kasamatsu, his captain, was there. They had been taking a short break from practice when Kise had answered his phone and started acting strange. He looked torn between helping the ghostly pale model sit down, and giving him a good kick in the back to snap him out of whatever funk he was in. "Kise?" He tried again but his Kohai remained in a catatonic like state.
Kaijō's captain sighed heavily and bent down to pick up the dropped phone. Hoping for answers he held the device to his ear but although the line was open all he heard was static. Frowning he hung up.
"Oi! Snap out of it!" He gave the model his trademark kick in the back only for his Kohai to wilt to the floor as unresponsive as before.
"Erm… captain…?" Moriyama asked. The Kaijō team was used to Kise's antics by now but this did not seem like one of his attention seeking ploys. "What do we do?"
Kasamatsu considered Kise's downed form for a moment before sighing heavily and attempting to redial the last call on his phone…
"…No reply." He sighed again and began to scroll through the blonde's contracts. He quickly skipped over 'Akashicchi' and selected the next name on the list with his Kohai's affectionate suffix.
"Who are you calling?" Moriyama questioned.
"Tōō. That Aomine should know what to do…"
A woman's voice picked up.
"Moshi Moshi~! Dai-Chan's phone~!"
"Ah… This is Kasamatsu Yukio of Kaijō High…" The captain stuttered out.
"Oh, Kasamatsu-san, it's Momoi. How can I help? Is Kise-Kun okay?"
"That's the thing, Momoi-san. Kise got a call from Kagami from Seirin a few minutes ago but… he kind of froze…?"
"Kise-Kun froze?" Momoi sounded worried. "Oi! Dai-Chan! Give it back!" Her voice faded out.
"Oi. What's up with Kise?" Aomine asked having taken his phone back.
"I don't know. He got a phone call and froze."
"Who called?"
"Kagami from Seirin."
"…What's he look like?"
"Urm… Red hair, tall, bit wild…" Kasamatsu was honestly a bit confused it was well known that Tōō's power forward had a strong rivalry with Seirin's player of the same position.
"No, you moron. What does Kise look like?" Kasamatsu flushed but quickly answered.
"Pale. Very pale. And shaking too. He's clutching at his stomach… Oi if you're gonna be sick, go to the toilets!" He shouted at the model. He heard a sharp intake of breath from the phone. "Aomine-san?"
"Momoi." The Tōō player did not seem to have heard him. "Situation: Spilt Milkshake. Call the others."
"H-Hai!" The line went dead.
"…Spilt milkshake…?" He question aloud. A whimper broke through his thoughts and he turned to see Kise had moved to curl himself into a ball.
-Incident 7-
"Satsuki?"
"Akashi-kun! Situation: Spilt Milkshake!"
"…I see… Casualties?"
"Unknown. It seems Kise-Kun got a disturbing call from Kagami-Kun. Dai-Chan figured out what was going on from what his captain told us."
"So Ryōta is still traumatised from incident five? He will be of no use to us then… Contact Shintarō. Atsushi is still in Akita and will not get here in time, but I am in the area on business. We will meet outside Seirin High."
"Hai!"
Akashi hung up and sighed heavily. It had been almost a year since the last incident back in Teikō. He had thought, hoped, that with Kuroko no longer directly under his control the incidents would no longer be his responsibility. However even he was not so cruel as to leave the people of Tokyo to the mercies of an angry phantom.
Especially when he was currently one of them.
He sighed again and turned to the men who were waiting on him in the boardroom.
"I apologise for the disruption." He stated and started packing his papers away. "But I have an emergency to attend to. Could we please reschedule for tomorrow?"
"Of course Akashi-Sama." One of them replied while all bowing low. "It sounds serious, I hope no one is hurt."
"So do I." Akashi admitted and strode from the room.
-Incident 7-
"Moshi Moshi! Shin-Chan's phone~"
"Konichiwa! This is Momoi, I need to speak with Midorin. Its an emergency!"
"Momoi-San? I'll go get him now." Takao approached his teammate. "Shin-Chan~!" He yelled and grinned gleefully when the shooter jumped.
"Get out!"
"But Shin-Chan…" He whined.
"This is indecent! Get out!" Takao supposed he was in the shower…
"But Momoi-San said it was an emergency…"
"Momoi?" Midorima eyes the phone in Takao's hand suspiciously. "Is that my phone? You answered my phone!?"
Takao looked completely unperturbed.
"Do you want a towel?"
"Just get out!"
"But Momoi-San said it was an emergency!"
"Give me my phone and get out!"
"Water and cell phones don't mix-"
"OUT!"
"Okay, okay…" He gave Midorima his phone and left the showers, going back to the locker room. He supposed if it really was an emergency he should keep his teasing to a minimum.
"Takao!" Midorima rushed into the locker room and started pulling on his clothes even with his body still wet. "Get the rickshaw. We need to go. Now."
"Wha-? Shin-Chan?"
"Now, Takao!"
"H-Hai."
-Incident 7-
Akashi, Momoi, Aomine and Midorima were all gathered inside Seirin High's school gates. Midorima had sent a reluctant Takao away once he had dropped him off.
There was a stillness that they had learnt to fear over the years of knowing Kuroko Tetsuya. It was too quiet and there was a sense of foreboding to the gym building to their left. They eyes it warily.
"So… what's the plan?" Aomine asked, shifting nervously.
"Get Tetsuya to Maji's." Akashi stated.
"Well duh! How?" Momoi quickly intervened before Akashi could tear Aomine a new one.
"Either we talk Tetsu'-Kun down and promise him a milkshake on us, or we restrain him and take him there by force." She said.
"Why couldn't we bring the milkshake to him?" Midorima asked. He acted put out but truthfully he was fearful of getting anywhere near an angry phantom without a milkshake peace offering.
"The closest Maji's is closed for refurbishment. The next nearest is over 5 miles away. I have sent for a car, but first we need to retrieve Tetsuya."
"I see. How far out is the car?"
"Another five minutes. Any more questions? Good, let's go."
-Incident 7-
Seirin honestly did not know what demon they had awoken.
It had all begun innocent enough, with Riko and Hyūga treating the team to burgers as their school year came to a close. Riko's dad had driven them both to Maji's and they had loaded the car up with food and drink for the entire team to enjoy as a surprise instead of practice.
The team had genuinely been happily surprised and had sat on the floor of the gym together, chatting and eating while planning their holiday training.
Then Kagami, in a moment of clumsiness as he reached for what must have been his twentieth burger, bumper the near invisible Kuroko causing his milkshake to spill.
Seirin had always considered themselves the lucky ones. They prided themselves on have gained the single sane Miracle. He did not get swarmed my fangirls and act like a child. He did not obsess over horoscopes and act like a Tsundere. He did not skip practice and act arrogant. He did not constantly eat and threaten to crush those who annoyed him. And he did not believe himself absolute and threaten disobedience with scissors…
In comparison, occasionally being caught unaware by the boy's presence, or rather lack of, was something they could happily live with.
Now, however, they were terrified!
Riko had been the first to comment, saying milkshakes were not healthy anyway. And it had all gone downhill from there.
Hyūga had been the first to fall. He had bravely stepped between Riko and Kuroko's new Ignite Pass Kai. From there it had been a slaughter in which those few that could had run and hid.
And this was the battle ground the three Miracles and their manager had walked in on.
The gym was deadly quiet and the florescent lighting overhead flickered ominously. And there were several unmoving bodies upon the ground. Midorima cautiously approached and checked on them. He identified Hyūga Junpei, Izuki Shin and Kiyoshi Teppei.
"They're all out cold." He whispered. "And we all know how." The others all observed the bruise on Izuki's face and Midorima lifted Hyūga and Kiyoshi's jerseys to reveal the bruises on their chest and stomach respectively. They recognised the distinctive marks left by Kuroko's Ignite Passes. Though these looked a little different, and they correctly assumed the 'Kai' twist was the reason.
"Where are the others?" Aomine whispered.
"This way." Akashi stated just as quietly, leading the way to the locker room.
Inside they found another, familiar body. Kagami was slumped against the lockers, his phone on the floor beside him.
Aomine did not know whether to feel sorry for the 'new light' or smug that he had, had to suffer the same fate as the Generation of Miracles.
Glancing around the locker room there was no sign of anyone else, Momoi even searched each shower stall.
"There are still seven members unaccounted for." Momoi informed the three basketball players.
A scream rang out from somewhere outside the locker room and then cut off abruptly.
"Shit," Aomine muttered and all four raced back out the door.
They found the unconscious forms of Furihata Kōki, Kawahara Kōichi and Fukuda Hiroshi in the corridor separating the gym from the school building. From the way they laid half in, half out of the supply closet it appeared Kuroko had found them hiding there.
"Poor guys." Aomine muttered as Midorima bent down to take in the damage.
"That brings us down to four. Mitobe Rinnosuke, Koganei Shinji, Tsuchida Satoshi and Aida Riko." Momoi softly said.
More screams ripped through the air.
"The school?" Midorima nervously looking down the corridor.
A sudden chill ran down their spines.
"G-g-g-g-g-g-guys…"
"Aomine?" Momoi asked with some concern.
"B-b-b-b-b-"
"Spit it out!" Midorima snapped.
"Tetsuya…" Akashi murmured and Momoi and Midorima froze. Slowly they turned round.
Before them stood what their nightmares were made of. Somehow Kuroko stood at the doors to the gym watching them with dark, empty eyes. And around him leaked a dark, evil aura.
"~Akashi-Kun~." The redhead tensed. "~Aomine-Kun~." The ace whimpered and stumbled back a step. "~Midorima-Kun~." The shooter adjusted his glasses with trembling hands. "~Momoi-san~." The girl bit her lip, eyes wary.
They stood in silence for several seconds, unsure how to proceed.
"~Are you here to agree with Riko-San, Akashi-Kun~?" Kuroko asked, voice deceptively calm and monotonous. Akashi cleared his throat.
"Agree with your coach? Over what, Tetsuya?"
"~That milkshakes are unhealthy~." Kuroko stated softly. His four old friends flinched, internally cursing the student coach for making matters worse. "~It was quite hypocritical considering the entire team was eating burgers and drinking soda~." Kuroko went on. "~Do you agree with Riko-San, Akashi-Kun~?"
The redhead internally sweated at the question. He could not deny it as Kuroko already knew his opinion.
"I agree it is hypocritical." He compromised.
"~I see~." Kuroko blandly stated, turning his empty gaze upon Aomine next. "~Are you here to challenge the Dim One, Aomine-Kun~?"
"The dim…?" Momoi elbowed Aomine in the side
"Kagamin!" She whispered urgently.
"Ah! No! No, Tetsu'! I'm here to… erm…"
"We're here to see you, Tetsu'-Kun." Momoi announced as cheerfully as she dared. "We wanted to see if you were free to hang out…" She trailed of uncertainly. She had never been on the bad end of one of Kuroko's 'Incidents', nor did she want to be now.
"~I see~." Kuroko repeated, not giving anything away. "~And you, Midorima-Kun? Are you here to warn me Aquarius has poor luck today~?"
"Well…" Midorima did not know what to say. It was true that Aquarius was second from last today, outclassed only by Leo in bad luck. And he was not about to lie, that would be blasphemy against Oha Asa!
"Shintarō is here to take you out and treat you to a vanilla milkshake, Tetsuya." Akashi interrupted before the shooter could say something to worsen the situation. Kuroko tilted his head to the side in what would have been a cute confused look if not for the dark aura that still leaked from him.
"That's right!" Momoi agreed, quickly catching on. "Midorin's lucky item today is to treat an Aquarius to a beverage!"
Midorima opened his mouth to disagree, but was interrupted by Aomine.
"Yeah, and me and Momoi thought we'd make an outing of it and we could all go hand out at Maji's."
Midorima shut his mouth and considered it. Was it blasphemy if he simply said nothing and did not correct them? He found whether it was or not, the price was acceptable to avoid having to deal with a volatile Phantom. He wisely kept quiet. And subtly hid his lucky pink yoyo in his pocket.
There was a tense silence for a long minute till even Akashi was on the verge of fidgeting.
"~Momoi and I~." Kuroko stated.
"W-what?" Momoi stuttered.
"~It's 'Momoi and I', Aomine-Kun~."
"W-what?" This time the basketball ace stuttered out, confused.
"Yeah, Dai-Chan!" Momoi cried, catching on.
"Your grammar is terrible, Daiki." Akashi easily agreed.
"It's 'Momoi and I', not 'me and Momoi." Midorima reiterated.
"What? But guys-"
"Enough Daiki. Tetsuya, do you accept Shintarō's invitation?"
Without hesitation Kuroko nodded, and though the dark, milkshake deprived aura was there, it had shrunk back significantly.
"Who will treat Nigō to a milkshake?" He bluntly asked.
"Nigō?" Aomine questioned. "Your dog?"
A growl had the four of them on edge once more. Slowly they turned to find the dog behind them. It appeared he had come from inside the school from where the last screams had originated. They cringed at the sight of what they identified as a ripped sleeve in its jaw. It matched the uniform of Seirin High. But what terrified them most was the familiar dark aura permeating from him.
"G-good dog…?" Aomine tried. The hound barked viciously, taking a threatening step forward. Aomine yelped.
"Should dogs even drink-?" Midorima began, only to be interrupted.
"Daiki will treat Nigō. Right Daiki." Akashi calmly said, though in all honesty he was terrified! Two Kurokos? Two milkshake deprived Kurokos? Forget Tokyo, the entire county had been endangered this day when someone had spilt the milkshake of one Kuroko Tetsuya of Seirin High.
When he found out who had been responsible he would end them.
"Right!" Aomine shouted. "I'll treat you to as many as you want!"
Like with Kuroko, the dog's dark aura shrank.
The chime of Akashi's phone brought all eyes upon the redhead. He brought out the device and checked the screen.
"The car has arrived." He stated. The others' relief was palpable. "Shall we?" He said, gesturing for them all to leave.
"Come, Nigō." Kuroko called. The dog yipped and dropped the ripped sleeve. He scampered around the wary visitors and Kuroko picked him up and placed him upon his head.
They turned their matching eyes upon his four old friends.
"We're thirsty." He stated.
The four rushed passed, though if asked Akashi would say he walked to the car perfectly calm.
-Incident 7-
"Milkshake incident number seven averted." The redhead said later that evening after Aomine and Midorima's wallets had been emptied in exchange for an astounding number of milkshakes drunk over a retelling of the happening inside Seirin's gym. "Instigator: Kagami Taiga. Casualties: Seven by Tetsuya and a further four believed to have been caused by Nigō."
He paused and stared out the window of the car taking him back to his hotel for the night.
"If Tetsuya gains any more pets… Kami help us all."
-End of Incident 7-
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