When the door slammed Reyes knew he fucked up. The naked woman in front of him wrapped her legs tighter around him and shot him a glare from her yellow eyes.

"Mon amour.." She whispered as she leaned forward and placed a kiss on his neck.

"God damn it Hana. God damn it. God damn it." He mentally scolded the girl before pushing away from the woman wrapped around him.

He grabbed his wallet off the kitchen counter and handed the woman $50, "get home safe okay?" He put his hand on her shoulder and smiled.

There was no time to grab his shirt, or his keys. Hana was a fast runner, and excelled at long distance sprinting. He had to leave immediately if there was any hope of finding her.

"Why does it even matter if I find her?" He thought, "She's not my kid."

He opened the front door to the apartment and was instantly reminded why it mattered. It was 2am, starting to rain and freezing cold. Knowing Hana and her reckless nature she probably didn't have a jacket or anything remotely warm on her body - not that Reyes could say anything, he was currently running down a side walk with no shirt on and an obvious tent in his pants.

Reyes pulled out his cellphone and saw the endless list of missed calls, all from Jack. He cursed under his breath and stopped, he shakily punched in the number.

Ringing

Ringing

Ringing

"Reyes?" The old man spoke quietly.

"What did you want?" Reyes asked, trying to catch his breath.

"I think Hana is on her way there, we had a fight.."

Of course they did.

Reyes blanked out as Jack explained the fight, but he caught the end clearly, "I snapped and told her I'm not her father."

Reyes blood boiled, his knuckles ached for him to reach through the phone and knock the old man flat on his ass. He punched his phone, ending the call and making the screen flicker, and he took off again. This time sprinting as hard as he could, he could feel his heart beating against his chest, trying to rip it's self out of him, his lungs hurt, his ribs hurt, his heart hurt, his throat hurt; the man was nothing but dry pain as he body struggled to keep up with his speed.

The rain started to pour as Reyes stopped in a park not far from his apartment; he decided to catch his breath for a few minutes when he heard it.

Hard sobs coming from the bushes, his heart ached a different kind of pain as he walked towards the shrubs, inside he saw her.

A tiny Hana, in nothing but a tank top and shorts, hair in braids, with red fingers clutching onto her knees, like somehow holding on tighter would make it go away. Her sobs made her hard to hear, as she questioned herself and her existence. For the first time in years Reyes fought back tears, his baby Hana was smaller than usual, in a dark, cold, empty place and convincing herself she had nothing.

He sat down next to her and grabbed her by the head; he pulled the child against his chest and felt her sobs push through her body. She was shaking, she was freezing cold and she was barely breathing. Reyes rubbed her head and placed his chin and top of it, he sighed heavily and kissed her head. Her tears had replaced the cold rain water with something hot and sticky.

He had seen Hana cry a lot over the sixteen years they'd known each other, he saw her cry when Commander Bunny lost an ear, when she dropped her bowl of ice cream and stained her dads rug, when he forced her to watch scary movies, when the kids at school ostracized her.

But all of those tears held nothing to these. These were tears of pain, Gabriel could feel her pain just by holding her, in those ten silent minutes he felt more pain by one tiny girl than he had in his entirety of war, he felt more pain than he did seeing those lifeless bodies, Jack kneeling down, covered in blood holding a small infant.

He felt Hana's pain and it caused him pain, his overwhelming urge to protect her was screaming, it felt like he had failed her. He picked her up and placed her in his lap, she held onto him and sobbed more. The man held her in a princess style carry and stood up.

They walked slowly through the rain. Not speaking, not making eye contact, just silence. Hana's sobs had died down, but he could still feel her choking as she held them back, her fingers were still tight around him as her body shook. But she didn't say anything, not a single word.

Reyes struggled to open his apartment door, he felt like if he carried Hana any longer his arms were going to break off. He continued holding her though, he held her all the way to the bathroom and set her down on the cold tile, she stood wobbly, her knees shook a little from the cold outside.

Without thinking Gabriel stripped the girl, peeling off her wet tank top and shorts, he threw them into the corner of the bathroom and started the bath. Hana was bright red (not only from the cold) as she took off her bra and underwear, before she could throw them across the room Gabriel had her in his arms again, carefully placing her in the tub like he did when she was a baby.

His clothes were off, and they were in their normal bath time position. Hana's back facing the large man, as she was between his legs. Gabriel washed her hair silently, Hana was silent too.

Finally she broke the silence.

"You smell like alcohol." Was all she said, quietly and with a slight stutter, she was trying her hardest not to cry again.

Gabriel forgot he had been drinking. An old friend had come by with whiskey and cigars, his two weaknesses. They drank and smoked until they were both unable to say what day of the week it was.

That's when she pounced on him.

Gabriel not having anything in so long took it gladly, he ate the woman's embrace up and showered her in kissed and bites, leaving her pink skin on her neck a light purple colour.

Reyes face turned red, realizing Hana walked in on him while he was both drunk and horny, something he had hoped she would never see.

"Whiskey is my weakness." He whispered.

Hana laughed, "You have weaknesses?"

Gabriel nodded, as he gently rinsed the shampoo from her long hair. "Whiskey makes me forget a lot of things." He chuckled to himself, "like to answer my cellphone before you get to my house."

Hana apologized; she turned around and looked him in the eyes. They were puffy, and kind of crusted, but very tired. She seemed to go over something in her head a few times and quietly said, "You don't have to do this stuff Reyes."

He couldn't think of what to say. So she continued.

"You don't have to constantly baby me like this, and pretend to be my father." Her voice was cracking a bit more; she started to stutter "y-you don't have to put your life o-on hold for me."

Gabriel pulled her to his chest; he hugged her tight and spoke against her wet hair. "I'll do this until the day I die Hana" he squeezed her a little tighter, "you're my escape."

Hana hugged her arms around him, her cheeks hot with new tears. She didn't understand a word the man was saying, but couldn't help but feel relieved at them.

Reyes smiled at her and rubbed her back, "When we found you Hana, we didn't know what to do. There was this tiny little girl with no parents, in a non-English speaking country with the biggest brown eyes we had ever seen. Jack, immediately claimed you as his. He took you to Angela and told her he was keeping you for his own."

Hana smiled at the thought, Reyes continued; "Jack was a dumbass, not saying he isn't now. But back then he was an even bigger dumbass. This is the man who couldn't even tell the woman he loved that he loved her, he had no paternal instincts. I don't think he had even touched a baby before that." Reyes laughed at the memory, "but in his arms was you, and he made up his mind. We cleared his entire apartment; there were so many garbage bags. Did you know your room used to be a poolroom?"

"Really? Dad played pool?" Hana giggled.

"Not at all, he used it as a lure for the ladies to think he was masculine and cool." They both laughed together at the thought of Jack trying to pick up girls with his pool table.

"He's kind of cheesy, isn't he?"

"I think if cheese could be personified it would be Jack." Reyes stood up in the bath, picking Hana up with him.

They rinsed off in the shower. Reyes gave Hana one of his t-shirts and boxers to wear to bed, he mentally noted to buy something for her to wear when she decides to use his apartment for his safe house. He didn't have ice cream, but he had cereal and Hana seemed to be just fine with that. He poured two heaping bowls of cereal and both of them sat on the couch, he watched Hana eat. Her wet hair stuck to her cheeks, and she seemed to really enjoy every bite of her cereal.

He inspected her more, taking the time to take a good look at the now teenaged girl. She wasn't the tiny child he thought she was, she was about 5'6 at this point, she was petite, but wasn't lacking in any departments. Reyes blushed when he realized how his shirt clung to her body when it was damp from her hair; her face was slender, brown eyes as big as ever, lips small with a slight pink tone, her nose was like a button and pulled her entire face together.

Hana didn't bother to swallow when she turned to him, "what's wrong?" her voice was muffled with the cereal in her mouth and her attempt at speaking made milk dribble down her chin.

Reyes laughed, before wiping the milk off her chin and assuring her nothing was the matter. He silently wondered to himself when Hana grew up, He remembered her when she was barely crawling, when her knees wobbled because she was too chubby to walk, when Commander Bunny was her best friend. Their first ice cream date, she was six; she's now nearly seventeen. Nearly the age he was when they found her.

"Hana.." he began, Hana interrupted.

"Don't worry Gabe, I know." She set the empty bowl of cereal down on the coffee table and hugged her knees together; "Jack really loves me, just because he's not my birth father doesn't mean he's not really my father." Hana sounded somewhat sarcastic, but Reyes was amazed at how mature she was acting in that moment.

When they entered the living area no one bothered to turn the lights on. The only light in the small room were the faint glow of the streetlight; giving the room a soft, but eerie orange tinge, and offering just enough light to see.

He stared at her; her eyelashes were so long, nearly touching her eyebrows when she looked upwards. Her lips sat idle in an almost heart like shape, she had really grown into a beautiful woman. Reyes shook his head and stood up, "is it okay if I drink?"

Hana seemed confused, "it's your house."

Reyes sighed and stood up, he made his way to the kitchen and pulled a bottle of whiskey out of the cupboard. Hana watched him pour himself a drink, swallow the entire thing and refill his glass. The bottle of whiskey itself looked more expensive than the couch she was sitting on, Reyes wasn't someone to spend a lot of money on things like alcohol, so Hana wondered where he got something so fancy; especially in this run-down apartment.

He brought the bottle with him and sat down beside Hana on the couch. He swirled the liquid around in the glass, focusing a little too hard on watching it go around. Hana decided to ask him where he got the liquor, he thought about it. She could tell he was trying to come up with some kind of lie to shut her up with, so she reminded him that she knew when he was lying.

He groaned and took a sip, "a friend gave it to me."

"A friend?" Hana raised an eyebrow.

He sighed and placed his hand on the back of his neck, "that girl that was here before." He almost whispered, "When her and her husband fight she brings me expensive whiskey and we have sex, it's been going on for a few years now."

Hana ran the explanation over in her mind, it didn't make sense to her why Gabriel would sleep with a married woman. Or why a married woman would come to somebody other than her husband to have sex? Would Angela do that to Jack when they fought?"

"But she's married?" Hana asked.

Reyes nodded, "it's not the proudest thing I've done in my life, and it's not something I would tell other people about." He took a sip of his alcohol, "but it's something that has been going on, and I'm not someone to go to her husband and tell him what's going on, I would get punched out."

"But she's just a friend?"

He nodded.

Hana stared at him, "is that what friends do together?"

Reyes blushed heavily, and rubbed the back of his neck gently. "W-well…:

"Am I your friend?" Hana asked innocently.

"Of course you are!" Reyes nearly yelled, not realizing how much he had been drinking, he felt his head and chest feel lighter, he didn't have control over how loud or quiet he could be. He set his drink on the table, deciding it would be smart not to continue with Hana there.

"Then why don't we do those things?"

Reyes choked; he looked at Hana in shock. "Don't joke like that."

She challenged him, "I'm not." She said firmly as she crawled into his lap, she sat there; staring at him.

Reyes was silently freaking out. Something about her big brown eyes staring at him made him extremely uncomfortable and a little turned on. He didn't dare move; anything that happened was on Hana's shoulders. The alcohol had sunk in deeper, he lost the ability to tell the girl no, and feared if he threw her off of him he would hurt her. Even though the territory she was stepping in would hurt her a lot more than her butt on the floor.

Before he could decide what course of action he would take to get the girl off of him and unharmed, her small lips were on his. His eyes were wide, in front of him was the not so tiny girl, her eyes were closed, her long eyelashes caressing her cheeks and leaving tiny shadows on her skin.

The rain had cleared and the light in the room became brighter, the moons silent light illuminated the room, with the mixture of the orange from the street lamps, the living room didn't look the same as it usually did. At this moment in time, the light showed him Hana, and nothing else. It ignored the clutter, and the dust, the old furniture and the cracking walls. His ugly living room was filled with a tiny, but bright beauty he had never seen before. Gabriel didn't know what he was doing, the alcohol had taken control of his body, whiskey was his weakness for a reason, and it made him unable to account for his actions. He found himself wrapping his arms around Hana's waist and pulling her closer to him.

She seemed to be shaking, like she was nervous. Something about how submissive she was made Reyes return the kiss, her lips were tiny and incredibly soft. He mentally fought with himself as their kiss grew deeper, all he wanted to do was protect her and if he took her innocence like this he was just going to hurt her. If he rejected her this far in, he would also hurt her and it seemed to be a situation where he would lose no matter the outcome.

He loved Hana, with all of his heart. From the day she was brought home he loved her, and never wanted to see her get hurt. He was there for her through everything, every time she fell off the playground he was there to pick her up, every tear she had ever cried he wiped away with his own sleeve. He couldn't count how many bubble baths the two had shared, something he held so dear to him was when he washed her hair and talked to her about the universe. Every time she had fallen asleep with him, he dreamed amazing things. For a short amount of time all of the suffering went away.

The permanent scars he had were fading. He wasn't proud of most of the things he did in his life. But when Hana was with him, he temporarily forgot about those things and that made him happy. As he pulled the girl closer to him, and felt her wet chest press against his, he felt like he was cutting open his scars again, making new wounds; new wounds that wouldn't heal if he didn't have her, and this was going to push her away.

She was so innocent. Everything she did had an air of innocence to it, and that was an air he never wanted to see go away. But as her hands tangled through his hair, and his tongue touched hers he felt that innocence slip away. He felt Hana become a woman right there, in his own lap, by his own hands. His couch didn't feel the same; it slowly became something he couldn't recognize, as Hana wrapped her thin legs around his waist he didn't feel like himself. He couldn't feel himself.

He didn't stop. He kept kissing her, pulling her closer. Trying to achieve the love he needed so badly but always ignored, trying to make himself feel better about himself. By destroying his future he would feel good in the present. She didn't smell like Hana anymore, she smelled like a mixture of sweat and the musty smell of the apartment. Her breath smelled like his whiskey, a smell he gave her. Her skin felt like his hands, a feeling he gave her. Her hair smelled like his shampoo, her lips tasted like his, Hana wasn't Hana anymore.

Had she ever been Hana? The moment she crawled into his lap was she Hana? Or did she consciously abandon her innocence, knowing Reyes couldn't say no in the situation. He couldn't wrap his head around it, he was in a daze from the feeling of her small hands, and the taste of her in his mouth, it was everything he could do not to carry it any further. He fought with himself to keep his hands on her waist, and not anywhere else.

He was slowly losing the battle with himself. As Hana slowly started rubbing herself against his thigh, he couldn't help it anymore. His hands trailed along her skin, she gasped at the feeling and Reyes nearly puked. He couldn't stand himself, he wanted this to end. This wasn't Hana, and this wasn't him.

The silence was broken, when his phone rang. The sound was almost deafening, but Reyes saw it as a blessing. Hana climbed off of him and he quickly pushed himself off the couch. He was numb, there was no feeling in his legs and he almost tripped into the counter his phone sat on. He looked at the screen; it was bright and made his eyes ache, the name made his chest ache.

JACK

He couldn't find it in himself to answer; he ignored the call and sent Jack a text letting him know Hana was safe. Was she safe? He looked behind him, she was sitting cross legged on the couch, her skin glistening with sweat and her lips still parted, like she was frozen in time. Reyes swallowed hard and walked over to the light switch, he turned it on and things returned to normal. There was no more beauty, just cracked walls, clutter and musty furniture.

Hana was Hana again, she looked small and innocent. She was covering her eyes from the sudden light and groaning loudly; Reyes silently thanked Jack for once again saving him. He picked up the bowls and his glass and brought them to the sink. As he silently washed them he told Hana to go to bed, she nodded and got off the couch. Reyes closed his eyes and nearly stopped breathing as she walked up behind him and wrapped her arms around his waist.

"Goodnight Gabriel." She whispered into his back, and kissed it softly.

He said goodnight and watched as she slowly went to his room, the light was on for a few minutes and suddenly the room down the hall was dark. Reyes let out a long, much needed sigh. He was nearly sober, but felt incredibly empty inside. He didn't know if Hana was asleep yet, and didn't bother checking. In that moment he hated himself, and just wanted to go back in time and stop himself from doing what he did.

All he wanted to do was tell her no, that he wasn't attracted to her like that. But the images flashing through his head told him otherwise. The image of his eyelashes on her cheeks, her wet hair tanged in his fingers, her eyes looking at him with the playfulness before she kissed hi, her tiny lips parted with a tiny bead of saliva hanging off of them. He shook his head and leaned against the counter.

Without thinking about it, he opened the cupboard and grabbed the bottle of whiskey. He took a long drink of it, and nearly moaned at the feeling of it burning his throat, and then threw it as hard as he could against the floor.

Glass and liquid danced across the kitchen floor. He watched as the off-white tiles became a caramel color, the glass sparkled. Reyes sighed, picked up his phone, and stepped through the glass, not feeling it as it cut his feet open. He grabbed his jacket off the back of the couch, put it on and tightly zipped it up. He opened his apartment door, turned the lights off and left. He couldn't stand being there any longer; all he wanted was to escape. He couldn't handle thinking of Hana anymore. Somewhere along the line, she became a woman and he was attracted to that woman.

Somewhere along the line he stopped looking at her like a child. He realized he had been lying to himself; he noticed her change a long time ago but never accepted it. Her skin wasn't soft like a child's anymore, it had the softness of a young woman, it sparkled and felt hot against his touch, something that never happened in the past. He didn't seek Hana out as her father figure tonight; he sought her out as a hungry man searching for someone young and vulnerable. He knew too well how a fight with a father can make a girl act like anybody but himself, and he took advantage of that.

It felt like he had walked forever, but he found himself at a familiar apartment building. He buzzed up to the third floor, and heard the familiar, raspy voice of an old friend come through.

"Jesse, it's me. Let me up" He spoke into the buzzer as the voice groaned and reminded him of what time it was.

There was silence, and then a click of the door opening. The building was too familiar; Reyes didn't need to think twice about where he was going. He made his way up the old staircase, three flights later he found himself in front of the old mahogany door. He grabbed the doorknob and smiled to himself when it was unlocked. He pushed the heavy door open and there he was.

Jesse McCree was standing in front of Reyes in nothing but a bath robe. Reyes shielded his eyes from the sight of the man and scolded him for not wearing something more decent. Jesse reminded him again of what time it was, and the two of them laughed. Jesse opened the cupboard and offered Reyes a drink, but was turned down as Reyes told him after tonight he didn't want to see alcohol ever again.

After a few minutes of silence between the two, Jesse spoke up; "why are you here Gabriel?" he asked.

Reyes smiled at him, "is there always a catch to me coming to visit an old friend?"

"Yes, there is. I'm not stupid Reyes."

"I need a place to stay for a while. Something happened and I can't go home for a bit."

"You didn't kill someone again did you?" Jesse joked.

Reyes took off his jacket, and set it on the couch. "Just myself is all."