Choices

They left the next week. Saiga and Kakei got to spend a few days together before he left for Osaka again but this time Kazahaya went with him. It was a long shot, an extreme long shot that Kazahaya would be able to confirm Tsukiko's identity but they had to try it. Tsukiko's hotel room was their only choice. It was where she had stayed the longest and maybe there was something left of her presence there.

Kazahaya was somewhat glad to be going away but not glad about why he was going. Traveling to a new city was exciting and he wished he could enjoy it but the reason he was going totally took any joy out of the trip.

Before leaving, he and Rikuo had sat down together. Rikuo showed Kazahaya many pictures of Tsukiko, some with him smiling in the pictures. Those pictures had torn at his heart. It looked as if Tsukiko and Rikuo had been happy together. Rikuo hadn't noticed him while he'd looked fondly at those pictures. Kazahaya had wanted to scream at Rikuo to look at him and only him but didn't. He'd sat quietly and let Rikuo explain all the little details of what the two had been doing at the time the pictures had been taken. That was hard but that wasn't all the torture that Rikuo put him through.

Next they had held hands while Rikuo brought memories of Tsukiko in to his thoughts and shared them with Kazahaya. Rikuo wanted to be sure that Kazahaya knew what she looked like, how her skin felt and how she smelled. Then he had given Kazahaya a favorite sweater of Tsukiko's so that if Kazahaya had any doubts, he could hold the sweater and yet again see Tsukiko.

That woman now lived in his thoughts whether he wanted her to or not. He wanted to forget her, to banish her from his mind but he couldn't. Rikuo needed Tsukiko and because Rikuo needed to know what had happened to her and to once again be close to this woman, Kazahaya would help him. Kazahaya would help him because he loved Rikuo.

"Hey you okay?" Saiga glanced over at the boy. He'd been silent the whole drive into the city. Even on the train he'd mostly sat in silence. It was like being around a freaking monk! "Kid! Are you there?" Saiga took one hand off the steering wheel and grabbed the boy's arm.

"What? Are we there?" Kazahaya looked about him searching for the hotel but they were still on the highway. Confused he looked at Saiga.

"What's going on with you? You haven't said more than ten words since we left home. You're acting kinda strange. Did something happen between you and Rikuo, something else?"

Kazahaya looked away from the dark shades and back out at the street. "No, we're okay. I'm…I'm just concentrating. I don't want to lose those memories of Tsukiko. Rikuo's depending on me to find something. I just want to do a good job."

Saiga saw the tremor in Kazahaya's shoulders and knew the boy wasn't telling him the whole truth. Kazahaya wanted to help Rikuo, that was a fact but there was definitely more to it than that. Maybe while they were here in Osaka, he could learn the real truth.

Concentrating on his driving Saiga tried to plan out everything in his head. They'd only be staying a day or two since all he had to do was get Kazahaya inside the suite, after that they could head back home. Using a couple of people he knew that were good with electronics, Saiga planned to bypass security, the staff and the cameras. He knew how he could get into the room but he didn't want to be seen doing it.

Once the kid did his thing they'd take what he'd found and go home. Possibly, Kakei and Rikuo will have found out something by then. They were going to do all they could to trace the things Tsukiko had bought or rather who had given her the money to do her shopping. Kakei was pretty good with a computer and if he couldn't find anything, he knew others who could. With any luck at all, they would finally be able to locate Tsukiko.

Since it was late, Saiga took them to a small hotel for the night. Thinking he could cheer Kazahaya up, he took the boy to an amusement park. It didn't work. He showed no enthusiasm for the rides or the food. Once or twice he saw Kazahaya smile at the antics of some kids but that was it. Finally he took him back to their room.

"Why don't you take a shower? I'm going to make some phone calls and make sure everything's set for tomorrow."

"Okay." Kazahaya tried to smile before disappearing into the bathroom.

Saiga shook his head as he stared at the bathroom door. Even without his special sight, he knew that Kazahaya was in there crying.

"Lonely around here isn't it?" Kakei asked. They'd seen Kazahaya and Saiga off the night before leaving the two of them to mind the store.

"Damned quiet is what it is." Rikuo pushed away from the counter. "I mean, it was quiet before with Kazahaya the way was but he was here, I could feel him here but it's different now. I keep looking around for him and he's not here. A part of me is missing because he's not here." Rikuo spoke softly then sad eyes rose to look at Kakei. "This must be what he felt. Kazahaya…must have felt like this."

Kakei moved so he was standing before Rikuo. "I imagine he felt much, much worse. He didn't believe you were ever coming back. You told him goodbye and walked away. What you're feeling now is nothing compared to what he went through." The words were hard and cold.

Rikuo stepped back from them. Tears formed and rolled down his cheeks. He knew he had no reason to feel sorry for himself and it looked as if not only Kazahaya blamed him but Kakei too. "I'm sorry." He whispered.

"Yes, I know you are." Kakei sighed. "I care about you boys but you have to know Rikuo, that what you did really hurt him. I think…I think Kazahaya-kun is trying to forget it all and put it behind him but you can't. You shouldn't. That loss and pain you feel - use it. Remember it and use it. You don't like those feelings so do everything in your power to never feel like this again." Kakei wiped a few tears away from Rikuo's face.

Rikuo nodded. "I will. God…I feel…torn. There's Kazahaya still hurting and in pain and then there's Tsukiko out there lost and possibly hurt. I can't seem to focus on one or the other of them and that's not fair." A hand rubbed over his chest as if to ease the pain.

"No it's not fair. Rikuo, I understand that you feel torn but… Let me ask you something, do you love him? Do you love Kazahaya?"

"Yes! Of course I do! How could you ask me that?" Rikuo's body tensed in reaction to Kakei's question.

"I ask because you don't act like it. No you don't!" Kakei spoke loudly before Rikuo could speak. "We are looking for Tsukiko because we all need to know what's happened to her and how whatever's happened to her is going to affect our lives but she's not here and Kazahaya is. You need to treat him as if he's important to you and not just some casual friend to be given only hints of your affection.

Before leaving to help you, he listened to you talk of Tsukiko and endured your fond memories of her. He's helping you with all of this willingly! Most people wouldn't – couldn't do it. Yet because he loves you, Kazahaya sits quietly and listens to talk about her, worry about and wish to be with her again. That's love Rikuo. If you don't do better by that boy, you will lose him."

Rikuo couldn't breathe. His wide eyes stared in disbelief at Kakei. He'd never looked at the situation from Kazahaya's point of view. God, he must be so hurt! I do nothing but hurt him! I didn't realize… Rikuo sank to his knees crying.

Kakei didn't like seeing Rikuo this way but he had to make him understand. Kazahaya loved beyond all reason and would probably give his life for Rikuo and all Rikuo had been doing was taking that love for granted. Rikuo loved Kazahaya but didn't know how to show it or was too afraid to show it. If he didn't soon change his ways and give his all, he would loose it all – again.

Elevator doors opened silently and Saiga checked the hall before stepping out. Reassured that no one was about, he motioned for Kazahaya to follow him. Looking back he almost laughed because the kid was still grinning. Finally, Kazahaya was acting more like himself. If it got the kid to smile again, he could laugh at me all he wants to, Saiga thought.

"Does Kakei-san know you do that?" Kazahaya whispered as they crept down the hall.

"I didn't do anything wrong and yes, he's aware of it." Saiga was a bit defensive and looking back he could see Kazahaya covering his mouth.

Kazahaya coughed a bit, "You were flirting with her! You even felt her up! Don't tell me Kakei-san approves of that! And – and she did the same to you!" Kazahaya was picturing the scene that had happened a little while ago.

They needed a key card to get in the suite so Saiga decided to borrow a master key from a maid. Luckily they'd come across one just going off duty and Saiga with a swagger in his step had approached her. Fascinated, Kazahaya had moved closer to watch.

Saiga had complimented her on her looks and said he was new to the city and needed a pretty tour guide. The woman just listened to him at first but then decided she liked the mysterious man with the shades. She moved closer until her shoulder was pressed against his chest. Encouraged, Saiga put his arm around her waist managing to feel her ass in the process. Kazahaya had a choking fit when that happened but Saiga ignored him.

Without the maid noticing, he relieved her of her master key while making arrangements to meet the woman in a couple of hours for some fun. The maid decided to end the little tête-à-tête by placing her hand on Saiga's ass and giving it a firm squeeze.

Much to Kazahaya's amusement, Saiga had turned slightly red and stumbled over a few of his words before hurrying off. Kazahaya had to run so he wouldn't lose sight of him.

Saiga stopped when he heard movement behind the next door but turned quickly when Kazahaya's laughter bubbled up out of him. One large hand covered the boy's mouth. He pulled Kazahaya close and held his breath. The door did not open and he sighed. Looking back at Kazahaya he saw eyes lit with laughter and could only smile back at him. "Come on before we get caught." Saiga whispered and still covering Kazahaya's mouth, pulled him along.

The cameras in the hallway had been turned off and the security staff saw only what Saiga's contacts wanted them to see. They were guaranteed only a half hour's worth of time for Kazahaya to do his thing safely, after that they were on their own. Finally at the suite door, Saiga released Kazahaya and used the stolen master key card to enter the room.

Kazahaya slipped in behind him. "I'm going to tell Kakei-san! If he doesn't already know. Man, if only I'd thought to take a picture with my cell!" He wiped away happy tears as he looked at Saiga.

Hands on his hips, Saiga tried to look stern but this was the kid he'd been missing for far too long. "Yeah, like he'd believe you over me! It was nothing, nothing at all."

"Uh-huh, I bet you got hard." Kazahaya teased then looked around the room and it suddenly came to him where he was and what he was there to do. All happiness and laughter was gone like a light switch had been cut off. "Well…I guess I should get to work."

Saiga was sorry to see it happen, if it were possible he'd scoop the boy up and out of there and find some way to embarrass himself just to see Kazahaya smile again but they did have a job to do. They came to Osaka not to have fun but to find Tsukiko.

Kazahaya walked the room touching various objects. The couches, a vase, a table, the TV remote were things most people would touch at some point. Memories and emotions flooded him but none of Tsukiko. Many people had occupied the room since Tsukiko had stayed there. He moved to the bedroom and went to the vanity. Different women stared at him from the mirror but not one was Tsukiko. He got the same results from the bed and from the bathroom.

"I guess it's been too long since she was here." Saiga said in the silent room. He'd watched Kazahaya and could tell the boy was coming up empty. "It was a worth a try but it's been months since she was here." Saiga looked around trying to see if there was something else the boy should touch then checked his watch for the time. Only ten more minutes before their safe window was gone. He was about to tell Kazahaya it was time to go when the kid gasped.

Kazahaya stood with one hand pressed against the window. It was a fantastic view of the city but Kazahaya didn't see it, at least not through his own eyes. He had finally found something of Tsukiko.

Saiga went quickly to his side. All color had drained from the boy's complexion and his breathing was shallow. Worried, Saiga wanted to jerk his hand off the window but wasn't sure if that wasn't the right thing to do. Again he checked his watch, only five minutes left. They needed to leave, now.

"Whoa! I got 'cha. Come on Kazahaya. Hold on to me." Kazahaya had suddenly collapsed. Saiga caught him before he could hit the floor. He lifted the boy up in his arms and hurried through the large suite and out. Not wanting to be seen carrying the kid and have people asking questions, Saiga headed for the stairwell. Once behind the safety of the closed fire door, Saiga sank to the steps cradling Kazahaya in his lap.

"Hey, hey! Come back to me kid. Come on, you're scaring me. Kazahaya!" Lightly he slapped the boy's face and was relieved to finally see the boy's eyes focus on him. "Hey there! You okay?"

Kazahaya recognized Saiga's worried face and nodded. Closing his eyes, he rested his head against the man's strong chest. "It…it was Tsukiko and it…wasn't."

Kakei sent Rikuo out for some take out. Saiga and Kazahaya were due back soon and they'd closed the store early. When he'd talked to Saiga on the phone, he wouldn't go into any details and Kakei knew that neither he nor Rikuo could wait until the store closed before hearing what Kazahaya had found out. He also wanted Rikuo to have some time to get his emotions together. The boy had promised him that he would do better with Kazahaya, to put him first and actively show his love instead of letting Kazahaya guess about it. Kakei just hoped he would be able to do it.

Hearing the backdoor open, Kakei left his office to go see it if was them. It was! "Welcome home! Safe trip? No problems?" He went to Saiga first, got a crushing hug and a kiss. Then he turned to the pale boy beside him and gave a warm hug to Kazahaya.

"We're good. Where's Rikuo?" Saiga asked as he watched Kakei cuddle Kazahaya close. He'd told Kakei about the kid's reaction to the vision and now Kakei was trying to offer him comfort much in the same way he had.

"He'll be back shortly with some food. Let's go into the apartment." Kakei kept Kazahaya close as they left the store. Sitting next to Kazahaya, Kakei looked over at Saiga. "So did you get her number, Player?" He asked slyly then laughed to see Saiga's cheeks redden.

Kazahaya perked up a bit. "You saw? Player!" He looked over at Saiga and started laughing again. "He wasn't expecting her to feel him up! Did you see him run off? I think Saiga thought she was going to follow him!"

"Mmm-hmm. I saw it all. Tone it down next time or you may end up sleeping on the couch." Kakei was picking at Saiga and Saiga knew it. They both watched Kazahaya laughing; it was one of the best sights in the world.

Rikuo was apprehensive about seeing Kazahaya. He wasn't sure how to act or what to do. He needed to show Kazahaya how much he cared yet at the same time he anxiously wanted to know if Kazahaya had seen Tsukiko. Shuffling the bags of food, Rikuo opened the backdoor and headed for the apartment but stopped before reaching the door.

Kazahaya was laughing – really laughing. It was a sound he hadn't heard in almost two months. Rikuo smiled and felt all his muscles relax. The day seemed brighter just because he was able to hear Kazahaya laugh. He wanted to stand there and just listen but he also wanted to see him, see that happy smile.

"Hey what's so funny? You guys having fun without me?" Rikuo asked cheerfully as he entered the open doorway. He was in time. Kazahaya's eyes shone with humor and there was no sadness anywhere to found on his face and that smile brought in the sun. "Welcome home Kazahaya."

Kazahaya turned to look at Rikuo, his laughter faded away but he maintained his smile. It felt good to smile and forget. "Thanks. That smells good," He looked to Kakei and Saiga. "Can we eat first?"

None of them could deny that smile so they pulled him up and went to eat. There were actually a few more laughs in him as he told Rikuo about Saiga's flirting. For a little over two hours, life seemed to return to normal. Friendship and fun had come back home but of course it couldn't last.

"It was Tsukiko but there was a double too. The woman seen doing all the shopping was the double while Tsukiko was kept in the suite." Kazahaya told them. "She wasn't well enough to go out and have any type of fun."

"Tsukiko was hurt." Rikuo looked down at the floor for a moment before seeking Kazahaya's eyes once more. "Do you…do you know how badly?" Blood, Rikuo remembered the blood.

"Sorry, no. I know she was weak. When she wasn't resting in bed, Tsukiko stood at that huge window that overlooked the city and yearned to be able to go outside. It seemed she stood there for hours with her hands pressed against that window."

"Kazahaya-kun, you said she was kept there. Was she alone or was someone there with her?" Kakei too sounded anxious.

Kazahaya shook his head. They were all waiting so desperately to hear what he had to say. Tsukiko was important to all of them – it hurt. "I'm not sure. What I saw, she was alone but I get the impression there was someone else besides the double in the suite with them.

"What about the double? Did you get a name or anything about her?" Saiga had held his questions in until now. He was carefully writing down the things Kazahaya was telling them.

"Nothing from her or about her, only that she looked a great deal like Tsukiko. She, Tsukiko often stared at the woman in disbelief because it was like looking in a mirror." Kazahaya shivered, it reminded him of what it had been like to look at Kei who shared his face but he forced that memory away. They were focusing on Tsukiko and Rikuo - not him.

"What else? What else did you get Kazahaya?" Rikuo was all but on the edge of his seat as he asked Kazahaya to tell him more.

He closed his eyes not wanting to see the hope and longing in Rikuo's eyes. Facts, he needed to focus on the facts then maybe they'd let him go upstairs where he didn't have to listen to them discuss her. Kazahaya breathed deeply and told them the rest of it.

"She was told about the trip – the one on the cruise and she was happy about that but the yacht, I don't think she knew about that one. No names between the girls were used, each called the other Tsukiko. The fake always told the real one about her day, the shopping and such which only served to depress Tsukiko and make her easier to control. Rikuo – I got the impression she wanted to call and talk to you but she was afraid. Either she was afraid for you or afraid to talk to you, I can't tell. When it came time for her to leave, she still wasn't very healthy but better than when she first arrived there. Tsukiko's attitude was…optimistic."

Kazahaya blinked his eyes open and saw the three men staring at each other, contemplating his words. Unconsciously, Kazahaya began rubbing his hand, it was beginning to ache.

"Something more to ponder, damn." Saiga said as he finished writing. They just couldn't catch a break. "What about you guys, find anything?"

Kakei blinked and looked to Saiga then Rikuo. The boy was totally lost in his thoughts so he spoke about the background search. "Whoever has Tsukiko is untouchable. Seriously, every single lead we came up with led back to an unknown person using a pseudonym or to a dummy company. This man/woman is like smoke – he's there, you can just see him but you can't touch him. There's money involved and influence, lots of both. None of my contacts got any further than I did or were too afraid to try harder. This level of evasiveness is hard to accomplish unless you have the best tech and people working for you. Some said that the work was reminiscent of stuff high level government officials would use to hide information or money." Kakei sank deeper into the couch and crossed his legs. "We were hoping Kazahaya-kun would find what we needed." He looked over at the boy and sat up straighter.

"Kazahaya? Is it hurting?" Kakei scooted closer to him. Kazahaya's eyes were closed and his injured hand was held against his heart while his other hand lightly clasped his wrist. "I'm sorry. We should let you go upstairs and get some rest, you had a long trip."

"Yeah, I'm tired. I'll see you in the morning okay?" Kazahaya stood slowly and looked over at Rikuo who still seemed a little dazed. He'd lost him. He'd lost Rikuo to Tsukiko. "Night."

"Hey, next time we go on a trip, we'll make it a fun one okay kid?" Saiga said trying to offer him some hope. Kazahaya looked exhausted and defeated. It hardly seemed that only a short while ago he'd been smiling and laughing.

Kazahaya didn't speak but gave a half smile as he left. It was time to pick a day. He needed to decide what he was going to take with him and where in the world he was going to go. Going home was out, maybe he just start walking and go wherever his feet took him.

"Rikuo! Snap out of it dammit!" Kakei stood and went to Rikuo and slapped the boy's shoulder.

"What?" Rikuo was slow to react. He looked up at Kakei but not understanding his anger, he looked to Saiga who just shook his head. Finally he looked to Kazahaya…wasn't there. Rikuo sat up then. "Where's Kazahaya?"

Kakei took off his glasses and rubbed the bridge of his nose. "His hand was hurting him, he was tired and you forgot his existence. He went up to bed. Look Rikuo, I know this information is upsetting but I thought you were going to do better with Kazahaya? He already feels left out since we all know Tsukiko but there's no reason to make him feel so bad that when he leaves the room, you don't even notice!"

"I – I didn't mean to hurt him! It's just…I hoped for…more. He can do so much…but he wasn't able to…find out more." Rikuo stood and started to wander around.

"So he's just a tool to be used?" Saiga asked as he moved before Rikuo and jerked him close by his shirt. "A pet maybe? But you didn't give him a treat for doing his trick! Damn Rikuo, are you so concerned about yourself, so selfish that you couldn't acknowledge him? Thank him?" Saiga pushed him away in disgust.

Rikuo felt the tears fall from his lashes. He saw Kazahaya as had when he'd come in with the food but he couldn't remember how he looked just minutes ago. He hadn't been paying attention. What was wrong with him? He'd promised to not hurt Kazahaya again but he did, every damn time! What was wrong with him? Was he even capable of really loving Kazahaya? Rikuo stumbled over to a chair and cried.

Saiga went to Kakei and they hugged each other. Saiga rested his forehead against Kakei's. "The kid's hand…I think it's time we took care of that problem and drop Tsukiko for a while. We're just going in circles with that so let's do something positive. You did find a way to get rid of that thing didn't you? That Black Shadow. The pain should leave if we send that thing packing right?"

Kakei leaned into the embrace. The two of them hadn't had much time together lately and he'd missed his lover's touch. "I think so. He's been touched by that thing twice now. This last time, his hand disappeared into that abyss and I think that's why the mark remains and he has that pain." He looked over at Rikuo who hid his face in his arms as he continued to cry.

"Yes, we've done all we can for now with Tsukiko. Let's focus on Kazahaya and maybe Rikuo can get over Tsukiko when he remembers the danger that Kazahaya faces here and now. I know Tsukiko is very important to him but Kazahaya is so much better for Rikuo, its time he realized that."

"I agree. When we saw Kazahaya's smile…everything was right. All was as it should be, he was happy and so were we. So tell me, what do we have to do?"

Kakei looked up at Saiga with a half smile. "So how do you feel about witches, witchcraft and spells?"

"Say what? Kakei are you serious? Spells?" Saiga was silent a moment then his lips moved to match Kakei's grin. "Well considering what the four of us can do, I guess some people would call us witches. Bring it on and let's send that thing back to hell!"

They felt better committing to something to help the boy they cared so much about. Kazahaya had been through too much these last few months, the least they could do was get rid of the supernatural being that threatened Kazahaya and give him some peace of mind that area of his life but upstairs that same boy was crying as he prepared himself to leave…