All Standard Disclaimer Apply.
A/N: Once again I ask that you all stick with me as we go on this roller coaster ride together. Keep an open mind and I will see it through to the end.
Thank to all who are reviewing and reading. And thanks and big hugs to Snugglebug for her assistance, support, and talent. Hugs to you!
On Friday night, Harm and Mac stood in the lobby of Castillo's restaurant, dressed in civilian clothes waiting for Mic and his date to arrive. It had been a rough few days for them each coming home tired and irritable after their individual sessions and having their Thursday session cancelled because of Commander McCool's daughter's broken ankle. Thus it was a tense couple that waited for Mic that night.
"Harm, fix your tie," Mac told him as she fussed with a strand of hair for the third time.
"I did fix it," he said. "Mac, leave your hair alone; you look fine."
"I can't get this piece to lay right and I want to look nice," she told him. "And you didn't fix it because it's still crooked."
"Well then here, you fix it, please," he said, slightly frustrated.
She turned and adjusted the knot so it was perfectly symmetrical with the buttons on his shirt, "There you go," she sighed. "You know what I was thinking about?"
"Hmm?" he asked.
"We never did do another pregnancy test. We need to," she told him. "Still no cycle."
She said it flatly, no excitement, just matter of fact like most everything for the last three days.
"How the hell did we let that slip our minds?" he asked in amazement. "Do you think you are or not?"
"I don't know, but I want to check. If I am, its high risk so I want to be treated as soon as possible," she told him.
Before he could respond he heard the familiar accent that was only Mic Brumby, "Ah, Sarah, Harm, nice to see you," he smiled and extended his hand. "Have you met Annie?"
Harm stood frozen in place, thinking this had to be some kind of sick joke. His mind immediately went from that to worrying about what Mac must be feeling.
Mac felt her gut knot as soon as she saw Annie come in the room. She knew the woman wanted her to act out, lose her cool, so she responded with calm Marine control. "Yes, she's an old friend of Harm's," Mac replied and extended her hand. "Nice to see you again."
"Hello, Mac," said Annie, taking hold of the offered hand. "Good to see you again, too." She then turned her focus towards Harm, hesitating a little, unsure of how she should act. She hoped he's say something, extend his hand to her, anything to break the awkward silence that hung in the air between them. He didn't.
"Shall we?" Mic finally said. "I have a reservation."
"Uh yes, of course," said Harm, thankful to be out of that moment frozen in hell. Harm reached out to put his arm around Mac, knowing that she was hurting way more than she would allow anyone to see.
She accepted his support and put her arm around his waist, presenting the picture of a happy couple. The maitre D led them to a quiet table in the back of the restaurant. Mic held Annie's chair and Harm held Mac's before the men sat down.
"So how did you two meet?" Mac asked once she'd put her napkin on her lap.
"Well, she had herself a flat tire on the Beltway. I changed it for her and here we are," Mic replied. "How are the children?"
"They're great," said Harm. "Between the two of them, we're on our toes 24/7." He was doing all he could not to look at Annie. He hated that she was there, hated having to listen to her and be anywhere near her, especially with Mac. He wasn't sure how he was going to make it through this meal with any sense of sanity intact.
"Lucy's feeling better then?" Mic asked. "Sarah has been concerned about her all week."
Harm was puzzled at Mic's comment. "Yes, Lucy's better. How...how do you know that Mac has been worried all week?" He looked at his wife, still unable to fit the pieces together.
"Um," Mac began. "Mic is my new right hand at the SecNav's office. Remember I told you," she said to cover it quickly to save face.
Harm knew she'd never told him, and he also knew this was neither the time nor place to get into that matter with her. "Oh, oh yeah," he said convincingly. "That's right. So, how do you like it there, Mic?"
"It wonderful," Mic replied. "Different than JAG, but its great working with Sarah again," he replied.
"So you stay pretty busy there, huh Mac?" asked Annie, trying to make herself a welcome part of the conversation.
"Yes," she replied. "There's always a lot of protocol questions, policy reviews and so on...It's easier there with the kids that way I'm home more. Of course when Harm's gone," she looked at him with a bat of her eyelashes. "The children are understandably distraught, especially Lucy." Mac took a sip of her water. "I just hope that the new baby is a girl, just so I can see that look on his face again," Mac sighed. "Lucy is his favorite, no matter how hard he tried to deny that he doesn't have one."
"A new baby?" said Annie. "I didn't know you were expecting..." Her gaze shifted to Harm, who happened to be looking directly at her for the first time all evening. He shot her a glare that, if looks could kill, would've had her pushing up daisies in seconds
"It's pretty early yet, but I've had babies before, I know what it feels like," she replied. "And of course the test was positive so..." Mac reached out to Harm.
He knew Mac was lying, and he knew exactly why, which made him more than happy to play along. "Yeah, it's pretty exciting news," he said, taking a drink of his wine. "If you'll excuse me for a moment, I'd like to go call and check on the kids. DJ was having a bit of a fit when we left, I don't want the Admiral to still be dealing with that if I can help it."
He leaned over and gave Mac a loving kiss before rising and heading for the parking lot. He had no intention of calling anyone; he just needed a few moments to catch his breath. It didn't play out that way, though, when not two minutes after he'd departed from the table, Annie joined him outside.
By the time Annie caught up to Harm she was seething, "What are you trying to pull? There's no way she could be pregnant!" she hissed.
"Oh, what the hell do you know about what she can and can't be?" he spat back.
"You told me she couldn't have anymore babies," Annie reminded him. "And she doesn't look pregnant, she looks sick."
"She's not sick," he said. "And for your information she just found out a couple days ago, if it's any of your business."
"It is when my baby is also yours," Annie insisted. "Not that you'd know it on our end."
"Damn it, Annie," he said. "We been over this; don't be calling your baby 'ours' until and unless it's proven by medical science! I still don't accept this mess the way you wish I would, and I never will."
"This is your baby Harm," Annie said firmly. "And deep down you know that. I'll let you make your call."
"No, I don't know that!" he exclaimed. "And neither do you! I just don't believe that there's no chance in hell that kid belongs to someone else!"
"Believe what you want," Annie sighed. "Just remember when I'm proven right you'd have missed out on a lot of his or her life." With that she left him and headed back to the dining room.
The group made small talk for the rest of the evening Harm and Mac keeping up their charade beautifully, making Annie and Mic believe they were the picture of marital health. Meanwhile Harm was sizzling with anger at Mac and at Annie, so much so he barely ate any supper.
He looked at his watch after everyone had finished their meals, hoping it was late enough that he could say they had to leave. It was nearly 10:30; good enough for him. "I hate to be the one to break up this wonderful evening," he said. "But Mac and I should really be heading home. The kids don't always go to bed like they're supposed to when we're not the ones putting them down and tucking them in."
"That would be for the best Harm," Mac replied. "I'm not feeling too well."
With a round of falsely modest goodbyes, Harm and Mac exited the restaurant and headed for their SUV in silence, a silence both knew wouldn't last long once they were alone.
"Alright, spill it Mac," he said harshly as soon as he closed his door. "How long as he been working with you and why didn't you tell me?"
"He only came on Wednesday and after my session with Vera, it just slipped my mind," Mac replied. "Like the pregnancy test, like our meeting wit Lucy's teacher...like a lot of things."
"Well, it would have been nice to know," he said. "Instead of being sandbagged tonight, and before you say anything about it, no, I had no clue whatsoever that she'd be there. That was just an incredibly nauseating twist of fate."
"I know that," Mac replied. "You would never want the wife and the mistress in the same room. You're too smart for that," she snapped as she felt the familiar burning pain begin to rise in her back. She grimaced a bit.
"Mac, don't call her that," he said firmly. "You make it sound like it an ongoing thing, and we both know that's flat out not the case."
"Maybe not with her," she murmured softly to the window.
"What? What the hell are you...? You know what? I'm tired of this! I'm tired of this 'at each other's throats' shit! I'm sick and tired of it! I'm tired of the up and down and getting along and not getting along - I don't even know what to make of it anymore, Mac!" He looked over at her and recognized by her posture that she was crying.
She turned to face him, tears on her face and fire in her eyes, "Well I don't know what to make of my husband lying to me, cheating on me, then lying some more when I asked what was wrong. I asked you because I loved you and I wanted to you to be happy and feel safe and you lied to me. When I asked you again you lied again and again, until I caught you," she spat. Then, "Pull over!"
"Why?" he asked, "I'm not doing it so you can get out and storm away from me, if that's what you've got in mind!"
"I'm going to be sick, pull the car over!" she ordered.
He did as she asked, quickly pulling onto the shoulder of the road, immediately feeling guilty for everything he'd just said. Sure, he meant some of it, but he could have been a whole lot nicer about it if he hadn't been so frazzled by the events of the night.
Harm pulled the car over to the side of the road as Mac asked and she barely made it out of the passenger side door before she fell to her knees and became ill. If the pain she'd been hiding since the salad wasn't enough on its own, now she had to add nausea to it. It had only been like this the month before her surgery, never before or since. She could only hope and pray this was a terrible coincidence.
Harm turned off the engine and flipped the flashers on as he exited the vehicle and went over to see if she was okay. He leaned down and placed his hands on her back. "Mac, what happened?"
She couldn't answer him, not that she wanted to after the way he'd just spoken to her. She leaned forward again and emptied more of her stomach contents onto the asphalt, her body beginning to tremble with the strain.
"Here, let me help you up," he said, offering her his hand.
"I can get up on my own," she told him, not wanting to reveal her current condition to him. She didn't want him to know the agony she was suffering nor how weak she felt from the heavy bleeding and loss of food.
The wheels in Harm's mind began to turn. "I don't remember you getting this sick this early on before," he said. "I guess this means we don't need to stop and get that second pregnancy test, huh?" He had a little smile on his face as he out two and two together, or so he thought.
"No, we don't," she replied coldly. "There's no need because there's no baby."
He looked at her, dazed and confused. "What do you mean there's no baby? I thought you didn't know for sure?"
"I do now," she replied. "My cycle started during the salad course."
"Oh God, Mac," he said. "I'm sorry...I should have known."
"It's all right," she replied. "I'd like to go home now. The side of the road is hardly the place for this."
"Okay, sure," he said, reaching out to help her back into the passenger seat. "Mac, I'm sorry for everything tonight; I really am."
"Most of it wasn't your fault," she replied. "What was well...I'm sorry isn't fixing that." Once again she shrugged off his touch.
With a sigh, he closed her door and they rode most of the remainder of the way home in silence before he decided to ask her how she was doing.
"Are you hurting more than usual tonight?" he asked. "From the cycle and all that?"
"I'm fine," she answered him and continued to stare out the window. "If you don't mind, I'd like to take a second turn in the big bed tonight though."
"Of course, of course," he said. "That's fine." He wanted to offer her a back rub, but he knew she'd refuse given the message her body language was sending him.
"Thank you," she replied. "I wonder how much trouble they gave AJ."
"Hopefully, not much," said Harm as he turned into their driveway and turned the vehicle off. He looked at his wife. "Do you need any help getting inside?"
"I'm fine," she replied again, when it was only her will and her stubbornness that kept her on her feet. "Thank you for offering."
With a nod, he led them into the house through the kitchen door. He spied AJ sitting in the big recliner with a very sleepy Lucy in his lap.
"Hi, Lucy Bear," Mac greeted. "Were you a good girl, hmm?"
She snuggled closer to AJ and nodded.
"How's my little Sailor?" she asked leaning over her daughter to brush a hair back from her face.
"He's fine," answered AJ. "He threw me for a little loop earlier, though."
"Oh really?" asked Harm as he removed his necktie. "Do I even want to know?"
"Oh yeah" replied the Admiral. "He used the 'big boy potty', which I assume he doesn't do all that often yet, correct?"
"No, he sure doesn't," replied an amazed Harm. "How did this all come about?"
"Quite simple, actually," said AJ. "Knowing his fascination with the toilet, I told him if he wanted to flush it, he had to use it like a big boy, and he seemed to like that idea. Of course after he used it, he kept trying to get Lucy and I to use it so he could pull the handle again, but I distracted him with a package of fruit snacks."
"That's too funny!" laughed Harm, hoping the difficulties of his and Mac's evening weren't noticeable. "I guess he's in his bed?"
"Affirmative," said AJ. "But this young lady here said she wanted to wait for her Daddy to tuck her in."
"I'm so proud of him," Mac beamed. "We have to give him some kind of reward, start the sticker chart," she told Harm.
"Daddy," Lucy murmured sleepily and stirred.
"I'll take her" said Harm, reaching down to take Lucy into his arms. "Thanks for watching them tonight, AJ. We sure appreciate it."
"We really do," Mac echoed as she watched Harm take their daughter to her room.
Harm carried his sleepy daughter into her bedroom and took the task of getting her settled in for the night while Mac remained in the living room with AJ. He could tell she wasn't feeling well, simply because he'd known her so long and knew how to read her moods like the pages of a book.
"What's wrong, Mac?" he asked.
"I thought I was going to have a baby, but I'm not," she told him. He didn't know about Harm's "mistake" and she didn't want him to.
"Oh, Mac. I'm awful sorry to hear that," replied AJ. "Anything I can do to help?"
"There's nothing anyone can do," she answered. "Nothing is going to make it stop hurting. And to think I actually...I'm such an idiot."
"Mac," said the retired CO. "I don't have much experience with this kind of thing, but I know a lot of women think they're expecting only to find out they're not. That doesn't make you an idiot, not at all."
"But I told Mic Brumby and his date," she confessed. "I didn't even...I should have waited and now...I'm sorry, AJ. This is my problem."
AJ could sense there was more to what was bothering Mac than she was letting him know about, but far be it from him to pry into people's personal business.
"I see," he said. "Well, you know if you think of anything I can do, I'm only a phone call away."
Mac rose from the chair she'd sat in slowly, "Thank you, AJ. I'm going to go to bed. I'm not feeling very well. Please let Harm know."
With that she turned and walked towards the bedroom.
Harm returned to the living room moments later, having gotten Lucy to sleep with the first verse of "Sara Smile." He looked around the room and asked "Where's Mac?"
"She's gone to bed," he replied. "She said she wasn't feeling well but I sense there's more."
Harm nodded. "Yeah. Yeah, there is."
"I'm sorry about the baby," he apologized. "But she knew it would be hard to conceive," he shook his head. "Or is that not it? I want to help but I can't unless you level with me."
"I know," said Harm, untucking his dress shirt. "It's...it's a lot of stuff. We're having kind of a rough time lately, but we'll be okay."
"Well, I'm here anytime for anything, you know that," AJ told him. "How's Lucy, she out?"
"Yeah," said Harm. "She was exhausted."
"She loves you to pieces you know," he said. "I wish I had that with Francesca when she was little."
"Nothing quite like having a little girl is there?" said Harm, a true smile gracing his face for the first time in hours.
"No there's not," AJ smiled. "Well, I best let you see to your wife. I'll let myself out." He extended his hand and the two men said their goodnights.
Mac could hear Harm and AJ talking in the living room as she undressed for bed. The cramping and aching were worst this month than before and her bleeding was heavier, probably because she was late. All she wanted to do was lie in bed and never get back out, ever. She pulled back the covers and slipped inside wearing only her USMC training shirt and a protective pad. She laid on her side with her back to the door, neglecting her pills, her pillows, all of her therapy in favor of lying down and waiting...for what she didn't even know.
Harm turned off the lights in the living room and made sure the doors were locked before heading down the hall to check on Mac. He knew she was feeling sick and was almost surely in a lot of pain from her cycle having just begun. There was also, he suspected, a little bit of disappointment at not being pregnant, even though she knew it was a million to one against that possibility. He walked into the bedroom and found her lying on the bed in her "safe position". With a shake of his head, he went over to her.
He sat on the edge of the bed and reached out to touch her shoulder. "Mac, please let me do something for you. I know you're in pain."
"I'm not in pain, I'm just tired," she told him. "Tonight was not very pleasant for me and I'd like to try and put it behind me and go to sleep. You should do likewise."
"Did you take your pills?" he asked. "I'll get them if you want me to; I'll get the pillows, whatever you need."
"What I need is for you to go away," she told him. "Just get out of here, please."
He knew he was getting nowhere fast, so with a sad sigh, he rose from the bed and left without saying another word.
Mac lay in bed knees to her chest, trying not to cry out in pain. It hadn't been this bad in a long time, this was even worse than when she miscarried their baby. Maybe it was the emotional angst on top of physical pain, maybe her illness really was getting worse, she was not sure. The only thing she was sure of was that the lump that had formed in the throat finally was giving way to tears.
Harm lay on the guest bed, having changed into his sleep shorts and brushed his teeth. He was thinking about everything that was wrong in his life, trying to temper it with everything that was right. Somehow, the wrongs seemed to plow right over the rights, and he felt himself growing more and more depressed. As he lay in the stillness of the night, he could hear Mac in the other room, crying her broken heart out once more. He wanted to go to her, but she'd asked him to leave her alone, and he wanted to do what she needed.
It seemed to Mac the more she cried the worse her pain became, the effort to breath through the sobs making the vice that surrounded her middle clamp down even harder. She wanted her pills, but then she wanted a lot of things she couldn't have. She was a Marine, tough, she could take this, it would pass eventually. Maybe if she turned over...
Harm could hear her cries continue from down the hall, and each one made him feel worse and worse. He wanted to go to her, but he was afraid of making things worse if he did. Instead, he stayed where he was, wishing he could take away every ounce of pain in his precious wife's life.
When she rolled over to her left side, to face their bedroom door...Well, that did it. What would have been a sob turned into a moan, which became another, then another, until she'd run out of air.
He couldn't stand it any more. As he heard her crying and moaning, he had to go to her whether she wanted him there or not. He leapt off his bed and ran down the hall, not stopping until he was by her side.
"Mac, Mac baby, please talk to me," he begged.
She wanted to but she couldn't speak, it was all she could do to breathe, so with shaky hands she reached for him.
He climbed into the bed next to her and brought her close. "Do you need your pills?" he asked, knowing that for her to be crying like that, she must surely be in agony.
She nodded her head, "Ooh, God," she cried. "Oh..."
"Okay, I'll be right back," he said, brushing her hair away from her sweaty face.
He returned in record time with her bottle of pills and a cup of water. "Here you go, babe," he said. "Open your mouth for me."
It was all she could do to manage even that, but she did and allowed him to give her the pills and some water, which she only ended up choking on.
"Can you sit up any?" he asked. "Can I rub your back? Tell me what I can do, Mac." He was fighting his own tears as he saw her in so much pain.
She was breathing hard and shaking, but she managed, "Hurts."
"I know it hurts, baby," he said. "I know it does, and I want to make it stop if I can. I'm going to go get your pillows and prop your legs up, maybe that'll help some."
"No," she told him. "Please, no."
"It'll help though," he said as he held her close.
"Hurt more," she told him. "Just...hold me."
He knew she needed to be in a different position than the one she was in, but he wasn't going to fight with her over it. After all, what did he know about what that kind of pain felt like? "Okay, okay, shh..." he said as he rubbed her shoulders. "I'll hold you. I'll hold you as long as you need me to, Mac."
When Mac relaxed a bit into his embrace and was able to get her breath she spoke again. "I'm so sorry. I should have...let you help me before but...I'm so sorry."
"Its okay," he soothed. "I was a royal jerk tonight; I don't blame you for wanting me to go away."
"You were a jerk," she concurred. "But that doesn't matter now. I just need this pain to go away. I feel so sick."
"Want some ginger ale?" he asked. "A hot bath, maybe? Whatever you need, I'll get it for you."
"Ooh," she cried out again as the muscles clamped down. "Make it stop."
Taking the situation into his own hands, he reached underneath her and moved her into the middle of the bed, laying her on her back. "I'll be right back," he said, "I'm getting the heating pad and the pillows."
"No, please," she begged. "Please don't leave me alone. Please."
"I'll be back in just a minute, I promise," he said, pulling his hands out of the grasp she had on them. "Right back."
Mac lay on the bed, moving every which way to try and escape the pain not that it helped. Harm was back soon though, less than two minutes, as promised.
"Here," he said. "I'm going to put these under you like I always do." He placed a pillow beneath her legs and one underneath her hips. "Does that feel any better?" he asked as he plugged in the heating pad.
"Still hurts," she told him, trying to relax after being moved. "Pills aren't working."
"You just took them a few minutes ago," he said gently. "Give them a little time, they'll help." He paid the heating pad on her abdomen and rested his hand lightly over it. "Tell me if that gets too hot, okay?"
She let it warm up a bit and lay in silence. "You can go back to sleep. I'll be all right as soon as the pills kick in."
"I wasn't asleep," he said, sitting on the bed beside her. "And I don't want to leave you like this."
She said nothing just moaned softly and let her head loll to one side.
"It hasn't been this bad since before your surgery," he said softly.
"It's never been like this," she told him. "Won't stop."
"What won't stop?" he asked. "The pain or the bleeding? Are you bleeding more than you should be?"
"Yes," she replied, lying wouldn't help. "To both." She moaned again and attempted to shift to lie on her side.
"No, no, don't roll like that, baby," he said, reaching over to hold her in place on her back. "How much worse is it than usual? Can you give me a number?"
"It's about a 9," she replied. "I have to move. It hurts too much," she told him and started to fight his hold, uselessly for she had no strength.
"Mac, please try to stay on your back" he begged. "The pills will kick in before too much longer."
"I have to sit up," she said urgently. "I have to sit up now."
Realizing that she knew what she needed better than he did in this case, he helped her slowly move into a sitting position. "Better?"
"Trash can," she managed before clamping a hand over her mouth.
He grabbed the small trash can beside their bed and put it in front of her as she sat in the middle of their bed.
If there was anything left in her stomach Mac knew she would have been violently ill yet again. Having lost all her supper on the beltway though she simply dry heaved until she collapsed against Harm. "It's not getting better."
"I'm calling Dr. Bradley," said Harm. "This isn't right; you're hurting way too much."
"I'm so cold," she told him. "So cold."
Knowing that she was losing more blood than she should have been, combined with her terrible pain and nausea, Harm was very afraid of what could be on the horizon. He grabbed the phone off the bed side table and pressed the speed dial for the doctor's office after-hours emergency number. Visions of that horrible night on the bathroom floor began flooding his mind as he waited for someone to answer.
"Dr. Bradley's service," a tired female voice finally answered after Harm had answered the automated questions and declared this to be a medical emergency. "How can I help you?"
"Yes, my wife is experiencing severe pain, nausea and very heavy bleeding with her period and I need to find out if she needs to be seen in the ER or not," said Harm, all the while rubbing Mac's forearm in an effort to keep her calm.
"I have to ask you a few questions first," the voice replied. "Is you wife pregnant or does she have any conditions that could complicate her period?"
"She's not pregnant..." he paused and thought for a moment; maybe she was and this was another early miscarriage...but knowing the chances of that were astronomically slim, he disregarded those thoughts and continued to speak. "But she has endometriosis. She had it treated 6 months ago, and this is the first time this has happened since then."
"Okay, how long has she been in pain? How much worse is it than usual?" the girl asked. She was not trained for this; she was trained for late night labor calls not frantic husbands holding their crying wives. She could hear this one in the background and the sound made her heart break. She just followed her script so that she could in some way help this couple.
"About 2 hours," said Harm. "And it's a lot worse than usual. She said it's about a 9 on a scale of 10, both the pain and the bleeding."
"And what's her usual scale measurement?"
"Um, just a second, I'll ask her," he said. "Mac, baby," he said. "What would you say is a normal level for you on a scale from 1 to 10?"
"It can get to about a 7, but..." She had to stop and bite down on another outcry.
"Is that her, Sir?" the service operator asked.
"Yeah," he answered. "Which is why I called. She's not usually like this and I'm afraid something is really wrong."
"Okay, this is what I'd like you to do," the operator advised. "I'm going to call Dr. Bradley in the mean time I'd like you to call for an ambulance just in case. While you're waiting have her lying flat, with her legs up and try to minimize movement. Keep her as calm as you can, the doctor will call you back soon. Try and stay calm."
"Okay," replied Harm. "Thank you for your help. I'll call 911 right now, then the line will be clear for when Dr. Bradley calls."
"Harm, no," Mac pleaded. "No hospital."
"Shh...shh... we're not going to the hospital just yet," he said softly. "I'm waiting for the doctor to call me back, but in the meantime they want me to call for an ambulance in case that's what we need. I'll sit right here with you, Mac. Don't be scared, its okay, I promise."
"The babies," she whispered struggling to move. "I have to lie down again."
Finally all of the crying Mac had been doing was overheard, thankfully though not by their children. Colleen appeared in the master bedroom and climbed up on the bed, trying to nestle next to Mac, licking at her hands.
"The kids are fine," he said, helping her to lie down again as he held the phone between his shoulder and his ear. "Lucy and DJ are both sound asleep, and we won't wake them up unless we have to. Hey, Colleen, be careful, girl."
The dog gave a whine and lay next to Mac, putting her had on her legs.
"911 emergency, how may I help you?" the operator asked when Harm was connected.
"Yes, I need an ambulance; my wife is experiencing severe pain, nausea and bleeding with her period, and her OB/GYN's office said to call 911 in case she needs to be transported."
"We'll dispatch unit to your house. Can I confirm your name and address?" she asked.
"2114 Maple Tree Blvd, Manassas, VA," said Harm. "We're at the end of a dirt road, and I need to request a silent approach so my children aren't awakened, please."
"Silent approach through 911 will also dispatch a police unit," she informed him. "I'll note it. And I'm showing your name as Rabb, R-A-B-B-, Harmon, H-A-R-M-O-N."
"That's correct," he answered. "The police unit is fine, just no sirens on either, please."
"I'll log it as lights only, Sir," the operator replied just as Harm's call waiting bleeped.
"I need to go, the doctor is on the other line, ma'am," he said. "Thank you for your help."
He switched over to answer the waiting call. "Dr. Bradley?" asked Harm, very nervous but trying to hide it for Mac's sake.
Dr. Bradley sensed his anxiety. "Mr. Rabb, calm down. Tell me what's happening."
"She's in terrible pain," he said. "Bleeding a lot and she's been nauseous for the past couple of hours. An ambulance is on the way, just in case."
"I'm not sure you'll need it. Has she vomited or just had the dry heaves?" he asked.
"Both," answered Harm.
"Has she bled through her sanitary pad?" he asked.
"Let me ask," he said, moving the phone away from his mouth. "Mac, have you bled through the pad, do you know?"
"I don't know," she said. "It feels like I have to change it but...I'm too tired."
He nodded. "Probably so, doctor," he said.
"Other symptoms, chills, disorientation, or lethargy?" he asked, feeling this was going to result in an admission if they couldn't relieve some of the pain at least.
"Chills and lethargy, yes," said Harm. "She hasn't been like this since before her surgery."
"I know, I know," he sighed. "Is she lying properly?"
"Mostly," said Harm. "She's not in exactly the right position, but she's on her back with her pillows beneath her legs."
"All right, this is what I want you to do. I would like you to add some extra elevation to her legs so she's at 45 degrees, and cover her with a blanket because it sounds like she could be going into shock. Now, you said you called an ambulance?"
"Yes, sir," said Harm as he worked at repositioning her pillows.
As Harm started to manipulate Mac's leg to prop them even higher the pain if possible increased even more. She tried to plead with him to stop but any protest died in moans of pain. She resorted to physical protests and kicked at him.
"Mac, stop kicking, baby," he asked. "Dr. Bradley said this is what you need okay?"
"She fighting you?" the doctor asked. As Mac cried, "It hurts. Stop hurting me."
"Oh yeah," replied Harm. "It's okay; I know she's really hurting."
"When the ambulance arrives, let then check her bleeding then call me back on my personal line. I don't want her to move if its not necessary," he replied. "Did she take her medication?"
"She did," said Harm, "2 pills about an hour ago but she said they didn't help."
"I'm going to have to get her some stronger ones," he replied. "She said they weren't working as well at her last appointment."
Before Harm could reply her heard sirens pulling up to the house.
"They're here," said Harm, "Thanks, doc, I'll have them call you as soon as they check her out."
"Excellent," he replied. "Sarah has my home number. Call me there."
"Will do," said Harm as he hung up the phone and ran towards the front door, hoping the kids didn't hear the sirens.
Harm barely got to the door before DJ started to cry at the noisy sirens and the pounding, "Manassas PD open up!"
"Great, just what I need," he muttered to himself as he unlocked and opened the door. "Hello, officer" he said. "I requested no sirens, now my 2 year old is awake."
"Sorry, Sir. No sirens usually means trouble," the officer replied. "Where's the victim?"
"Mooomeeeee!" DJ wailed from his bed.
"She's not a victim, she's a patient," said Harm. "She's back here."
"The medics will be here shortly, Sir," the female of the duo replied. "You'll have to excuse him, it's his second day."
A moment later the medics pulled up to the door, silently as requested and the same pair that had treated Mac before reentered the house.
"Hello again," said Harm with a sigh. "She's back here, follow me."
"Mooomeee!" DJ wailed now wandering out of his bedroom into the hall.
"It's okay, son," said Harm, scooping up the boy on his way to where Mac was. He showed the crew to the master bedroom, entering first to let Mac know they were there.
"Mac, baby the paramedics are here," he said as he sat on the edge of the bed.
As soon as the older medic, who'd introduced himself again as Ray leaned over the bed, Colleen perked up, growled and showed her teeth.
"Hey, calm down, girl," said Harm. "These people are just here to help; it's okay."
Ray reached over and patted the dog, "You're a good dog, aren't you?" he asked not showing fear so Colleen settled down.
"Sir," the pretty red headed female offered. "I'll take your son. I have three kids at home."
Harm once again sat beside his wife, waiting for the medics to determine what she needed.
"Mrs. Rabb, I'm going to lift you blanket up okay?" Ray asked her. "I need to see how much you're bleeding so I can tell the doctors."
"No..." she cried. "It hurts too much to move."
"You don't have to move, Ma'am," he said. "I'll do it for you or your husband can do it, but I need to look, okay?"
"It's okay, baby," he said. "I'm right here."
The medic lifted the blanket and pushed up Mac's knees. "I'm just going to look; I'm not going to touch okay?"
Mac didn't reply, she was too worn out and in too much pain.
After a minute, "Good news, she hasn't bled through the sanitary pad," the medic announced. "Mrs. Rabb, where's the pain worst? In your back or in your belly?" He asked, gently palpating her stomach.
"Belly," she said, drawing in a sharp breath as he examined her.
"On the right, the left or in the middle," he asked. "I'm sorry; I'm going as fast as I can."
"All over," she said.
"Abdomen's distended," Ray told his partner. "Mr. Rabb, I think we have to take her in."
"Oh, her doctor, Dr. Bradley," said Harm. "Asked me to have you call him as soon as you examined her so he could decide if she needed to go in or not."
"Sure thing," he said. "Where's the phone?"
"Right here," said Harm, handing over the handset. "Here's his home number as well, he said to use it."
"Okay, let's clear out and give them some privacy," he told his partner and the second cop.
As they left, DJ's new friend entered the room with him. "He wants to kiss Daddy goodnight," she told Harm.
"Good night, little man," he said as he rose from the bed and gave the boy a kiss.
"Mommy?" he asked his little eyebrows knitted together.
"Mommy's okay," replied Harm. "She's very sleepy, just like you are. Can you go get back in your bed and go to sleep for me and mommy?"
DJ nodded, "Night night," he said and to Harm's surprise laid his head on the officers shoulder.
"Looks like you've made a new friend, officer," said Harm with a smile.
"I told you, three boys at home, Sir," she smiled. "Let's go back to bed," she said to DJ carrying to all ready dozing child back to his room.
"Harm? Harm?" Mac murmured from the bed.
"I'm here," he said, returning to her side. "What is it?"
"Harm?" she asked again.
"Mac, I'm right here, baby," he said, taking her hand in his.
"Can I have my legs down?" she asked. "This hurts so bad."
"Sure, okay," he said, gently lowering her legs and rearranging the pillows beneath her.
"Hey, no, no," he said, reaching out to stop her motion. "You have to stay on your back."
"I don't want to," she told him. "It hurts too much. Leave me alone."
Again knowing that she was in more pain than he could imagine, he backed away and let her lay however she felt was most comfortable.
The medics came back in then, "Mr. Rabb, her doctor said she can't lie like that," he told him. "He also said if she doesn't want to go not to force her and he'll stop by in the morning."
"You tell her she has to move then, " said Harm. "She's not listening to me."
"Mrs. Rabb," Ray said gently. "You have to stay on your back. Please roll back over to your back."
Mac ignored the medic's gentle prodding and stayed in her curled position.
He tried again, "You have to roll over, Ma'am," he told her. "I'm going to help you, okay?"
Lacking the strength to fight him, she conceded.
"Now, do you want to go the ER?" he asked. "Or wait until morning?"
"I'm not going anywhere," she said, her voice proving how exhausted she was. "Can you fix the pain?"
"No," he said sadly. "I can't. But you can take some Tylenol to boost your pain killer and maybe your husband can help. Sometime if you rub her stomach down low, the spasms will stop."
Harm nodded. "I'll try that if she wants me to," he said. "Aside from that and the pills, should I just keep her still and comfortable?"
"Can I see you outside?" the medic asked in a hushed voice.
With another nod, Harm stepped into the hallway, followed by the medic.
"He authorized us to give her a shot of Demerol, but I need you to sign this waiver," he told him.
"Okay," said Harm, taking it into his hands and reading it carefully.
It was simple form, stating that if he accepted this recommended treatment the medics administering it were not liable for any adverse outcomes. With a flourish of a pen he signed his name.
"There you go," he said, handing the form and pen back to the medic. "Will this shot help her much?"
"It will take the edge off and probably knock her out," he replied. "It could relieve the pain all together. Of course once it wears off the pain will return," he sighed.
"That's how it always goes," said Harm. "Go ahead and give it to her though, any help is better than none at all."
"Mrs. Rabb," the medic spoke to her softly. "Let me have your arm. This is going to help."
"Wh...What is it?" she asked.
"Medicine for the pain," he replied. "Your doctor said it was all right to give you until he can see you tomorrow."
"'Kay..." she said, holding her arm out towards him.
He swabbed her arm with alcohol, "Just a little prick," he told her as he inserted the syringe into her muscle and administered the medication. "There you go."
"Thank you," she said softly.
"No problem," he sighed. "You try and rest." Then to Harm, "If you need us back, call the regular line and ask for bus 4. If we're not on a job, we'll come right out to you" He said this as he gathered his kit and his partner so they could depart, the police having all ready done so.
"Will do," said Harm as he showed the men to the door. "Thanks for all your help, guys."
"We're sorry we had to come out, but glad we could help," Ray replied. "Take care, Sir."
With that, they were gone and for the first time in hours, their house was deadly silent.
Harm locked the front door and turned out the living room lights for the second time that evening before returning to the master bedroom to check on his wife. She was lying on her back, as the medics had left her, shivering and crying just a bit. He sat down beside her and brushed her hair off her still sweaty face. "You feel any better?" he asked.
"I feel heavy," she replied, her speech slurring from the drugs. "Cold."
He pulled another blanket up over her. "It's okay. The medicine will really help you feel better, and in the morning the doctor will come by and check on you."
"Come by?" she asked confused. "I have work, I can't..."
"You're not going to work, sweetie," he said softly. "I'll take care of all that; you just worry about getting better. Dr. Bradley is stopping by before he makes his rounds in the morning."
"But there's budget meeting and I told Mic..." She shifted and made a softer moan.
"Don't worry about any of that," he said again. "Just try to get some sleep, okay? I'll be right down the hall if you need anything."
"No," she said weakly, her voice fading as she lost the battle with the drugs and the pain.
"You don't need anything right now?" he asked.
"No," she said again. "No. No." She knew what she wanted to say, but couldn't get her brain to make her mouth form the right words.
"No what, babe? What is it?" he asked, trying to think back over what he'd just said to her. "No, you don't want to go to sleep?"
"No," she said again trying to force herself to get the right words out before she slipped into oblivion. "Tired."
"Okay then," he said. "Go ahead and sleep; don't fight it. I'm going to go try and do the same, but if you need me just call my name."
As Harm rose from the bed Mac did just that, "Harm!" she said with more strength than she thought she had in her at the moment. When he turned she reached out her hand.
"What, baby? What's wrong?" he asked as he took a hold of her hand.
She mumbled something, the only word he heard was, "Alone."
It hit him; she didn't want to be alone. "You want me to stay in here with you? Is that it?"
"Stay," she echoed. "Here. Right here." She touched the side of the bed to illustrate her point.
"Are you sure, Mac?" he asked softly.
She nodded just once, her eyelids starting to close. "Stay," she said again.
"Okay," he whispered, caressing her hand with his thumb. He went around to his side of the bed and carefully slid beneath the covers next to her. "Is this okay? Do you have enough room?"
She nestled closer in answer, then all movement ceased and her grip relaxed as she was taken to the blissful realm of sleep.