"You know, I think you will make a great father," her words come suddenly and Zuko looks up from Tom-Tom's bright red cheeks to see his girlfriend, who looks more than a little beautiful, staring at the sight before her. The young man can feel a kind of happy-like-a-kid-praised-for-having-good-grades kind of joy fill his being. He smiles at her, a toothy grin plastered on his features as he shakes the milk bottle his future brother-in-law is drinking from.
Her parents do not know of the prince's attempt at feeding their son. They are, after all, in Omashu, while Mai and her brother are in the Fire Nation. "Well, what makes you say that?" he asks as he pulls the bottle from the boy's mouth and proceeds to rub the child's back to release a burp. Yes, he is really getting into the whole father thing.
"The way you hold him… even Dad doesn't do that. And you change his diapers, which is so sexy," she says with a smirk. He returns the gesture.
"Well, I like to think my mother raised me with good manners," he replies and touches his hand to Tom-Tom's face. At two, Tom-Tom is something that brightens the young prince's life and that is all thanks to his beautiful girlfriend giving him the opportunity to be a father… of sorts.
"Poo-poo," the child says loudly as his face turn a certain colour of green. Mai is slightly alarmed but Zuko knows exactly what needs to be done. He carries the child and moves him to the bathroom where there is a potty. The prince places the boy, whose face reflects his concentration on his task, Zuko smiles and touches his hand to the child's face. Mai comes into the bathroom to find a prince, who is not afraid of getting his hands dirty and a boy who adores said prince.
Tom-Tom who has relieved himself tries to grab the prince's fringe. Zuko captures his chubby hand in his larger one as he lifts the child into his arms and cleans him. It may seem dirty to most, he knows, but Zuko cannot help but think that he is very good at handling children.
"When we have our children, I swear I'll be hands-on," he tells his girlfriend who indulges in a rare smile. Amused, Mai even chuckles light-heartedly. "What?"
"You really are confident that we will end up together huh?" she says, clearly tickled. Mai is a completely different person when she's with Zuko. She is kinder, she smiles more, and above all, she is happier. Zuko moves to her, the boy still in his arms as he presses his lips to hers.
"I wouldn't have it any other way," he says and her cheeks redden. Yes, indeed, she would love to be the mother of his children.
Zuko
X
It has been eight weeks since she left. I sit in my bedroom as I look through the pictures she had drawn of us. My favourite one is still hangs on my wall. It is the first we got painted, way back when we started dating. I close my eyes as I think about the love of my life. I didn't even have the opportunity to say that I'm sorry. After I left that day, I reflected on my dumb behavior but I never got to apologize and that is something that will haunt me for the rest of my days.
"Mai," the sound of her name on my lips is more than I can bear and before I know it, I am reduced to a sobbing mess. "I love you," I don't think I said that to her enough. Mai deserved to be loved, still deserves to be loved. She is perfect, despite all my tantrums and childishness, she still loved me and I'd like to think that she still does.
As I look through the keepsakes I have of her, I chance upon woodcarvings, two to be exact. On the first, there is her face. The other bears mine. The words carved into the wood- inseparable, connected, forever. I can feel my throat closing. The bastard that carved this… he owes us an apology for lying. I shut my eyes as I feel a form of guilt flood my being. That day, that damned day I was too fucking stupid, I let her be less than happy. The fact that I once swore I would never let her down is not helping.
I am a disappointment, foolish and stupid and that is a sad fact. I run my thumb over her features. If only… if only I had a chance to tell her how sorry I am, tell her that I will give her suggestion a chance, tell her I love her, my life would be less freaking pitiful.
I fish out the ring I had bought along with the one I got for her birthday. The gold sparkles in the light and I can feel my inner fire roar as I touch the ring that is hanging from my neck. It is warm to the touch and I wonder when it will next meet its other half. A familiar gush of sorrow engulfs me, threatening to make me fall deeper into my broken pit of sorrow. I take a swig of fire whiskey. The drink is what has accompanied me for the much of my time brooding.
For eight weeks, I have been wallowing in sadness and bitterness, taking every opportunity available to hate myself. To be honest, I have considered suicide on multiple occasions, though the memory of Mai brings me back to reality. If I die, then I would be letting her down.
There is a knock on my bedroom door but I do nothing to conceal the fact that I have been drinking heavily. I pull the door open and there staring up at me is my firebending master. Master Hisaishi is a good man, always has been, always will be. He is a good friend, a pillar of support when my late father wasn't. I sigh loudly and head back into my room, though I leave the door open. The master enters and looks around him. He is visibly upset and disturbed but does nothing to hide this.
"Agni damn it," he says loudly as he moves to look me square in the eyes. "I know it hurts," he says and shakes his head. "I know how much you love her, she was your world, but Zuko, people die, they don't live forever. You have got to pull yourself together," he says and slaps my face lightly.
"Fuck you," I say aloud and push him away but he doesn't back down. "Fuck all you bastards," my voice is hostile and I mean every word. I have no one, there is no one but me, in this lonely world. And then there is a thought, I am not alone, there is Master Hisaishi here with me and that, although isn't enough, should make things lighter.
I move to sit on the chair at the dresser and the master takes a seat on my bed. I close my eyes as he sighs softly and shakes his head. "It's been hard on you," he says quietly and moves to touch my shoulder. "But I remember you telling me that she wanted you to join the army," he states and I open my eyes. His face is sober but there is something there, just a little touch of hope. Maybe there will be some light out of this situation after all.
"Yes, she does," the present tense is something that brings my spirit down because it is a lie, something I tell myself to make it less difficult to live. "She did anyway," I correct myself and he scratches his chin thoughtfully.
"There is a friend of mine, Zhuang is his name and he is a great general of high standing. Why, he even fought alongside your uncle once," he says and looks at me. I ponder this over. Maybe it would be a good idea after all, maybe it would be nice to honor the memory of the woman I love.
"When can I talk to him?" my words are firm, certain. He smiles at the revelation that there is hope yet.
"Well, he is free whenever you are," he says and pats me on my shoulder. "Remember Zuko, this is what Mai wants," and then he leaves, even though my mind burns with a thousand questions.
X
He lies in her bed and waits for her to get ready. With his firebending, he lights the candles at her bedside and inhales their sweet scent. Scented candles for a beautiful night, with a beautiful woman. Zuko is slightly impatient as the sound of water splashing comes to him. She is bathing in the washroom.
He's made love to her before, their first time happened one night when they had gone hiking in the Southern Fire Nation. Her sixteenth birthday had just passed and she had told her parents that she would be visiting Ty Lee to celebrate. It wasn't a complete lie, Ty Lee had indeed agreed to let Mai and Zuko occupy the house that was her parents'.
They had been tracking for days, occasionally stopping to take in the fresh air and the scenic picture of mountains and valleys. When they finally reached the other girl's house, they got settled in for the night. Zuko was the perfect gentlemen, sleeping separately from his girlfriend. He was not your average horny teenager who couldn't control their hormones. He had been tempted as hell to slip into her bed and make love to her but refused to do anything she wasn't ready for.
Then at midnight, when he was struggling to get to sleep, she had crawled into his bed, holding on to him as she touched his chiseled chest with her slender fingers. He couldn't resist her and had kissed her, it was chaste at first. Innocent and beautiful, but soon grew wild with lust and longing. And then before they knew it, they were making sweet, sweet love.
Zuko recalls the way her body felt in his grasp that night and that familiar impatience fills his waiting body. He moves to her bathroom and knocks on the door softly.
"Mai," he says as he removes his shirt and waits for a response. She moves to open the door and in front of him, there in all her beauty is Mai, naked and ready. She holds him and kisses him and plays with him until he can take no more of her teasing. He moves her to the bed and kissing her passionately, leans her gently on the pillow.
He tries to play hard to get but she knows that she has the upper hand as she moves. He can tolerate no more of her teasing and begs, boy does he beg and she gives him what he desires. And that night as they sleep, he dreams of her, and the scent of their candles.
A/N: review people! i love this side of Mai so much it isn't even funny. anyways, i'd love to hear from you! review or send me a pm with your thoughts and constructive advice. thank you for reading! oh and btw, check out my other zutara story 'fallen tears' and review. AND i thought you might like to read and review Bittersweet by ilovesifuhotman. it's really good!