Zack took a sip of his coffee and rubbed his temples. He was hiding out in one of his favorite coffee shops downtown near his college. Well, he wasn't exactly hiding. He secretly knew he came here hoping that V would look here first and talk to him. He tapped his fingers against the table as he watched the onslaught of people grow as 8:00 reached. Time for everyone to go to work. Zack had been sitting here for nearly three hours.

He'll come here and find me. He will… another hour passed. Zack rested his head in his hands. He'll rush in and change his mind. He'll give us a chance. Another hour then another. He's…not gonna show up is he?… There was a lurch in his chest. How foolish to think that he could replace Rika. The manager and waiters were giving him a look of sympathy as if he had been stood up. Maybe, technically he had. Zack stood up, his legs popping from staying still for so long. You're pathetic. You waited here all this time and for what? A sore back and stiff legs.

Zack put his tip on the table and left the building. He looked at his phone. No call. No text. He was almost angry. He wanted V to at least call. To say he… Zack stopped. How selfish am I? I wanted him to call only to say he wanted to give it a chance. Nothing more. Nothing less. He watched as a couple walked by. The girl giggled as the guy wrapped an arm around her.

"You're so cute and small Rina."

"Oh stop!"

"You're such a pretty girl."

Heh…a girl. Would he have accepted me if I was a woman? I looked at my reflection in the window. I touched my face, and my neck. Yeah. No hiding that I'm most definitely a guy. He looked up into the clouding winter sky. Why hadn't God made me a woman? Would I even have a chance? If I knew V first would he love me? Or was Rika that special?

"Ugh!" I smacked my cheeks trying to wake myself up. "I need to stop wallowing and go do something else!"

"Hey Zack! Come on in!"

"Thanks Hyun."

"So, what made you call all of a sudden?"

"No reason. Just wanted to hang out. It's been awhile."

Hyun opened his fridge and pulled out two beers. "Oh wait…you don't drink. Well I don't have much I could-"

"Just give it here."

"Really?"

"I'll be fine Hyun." Zack took the can and opened it with a loud PTSS. He watched as the cream colored foam fizzed out the top then bubbled back into the liquid courage. "So, how's acting?"

"Pretty good. I got a new lead—ahem lead role— in a broadway play."

Zack smiled. "Great job!" They fist bumped. "Damn! I'll have to go see it!"

"I'll get you and V tickets."

Zack frowned. "What makes you think I wanna go with him?"

Hyun stopped drinking midway. "Huh? Well I mean you two do everything together."

Zack forced out a roar of laughter. "Pfft Yeah right. And besides, we have our own lives. Ones where you leave the other out of it." He felt the can dent in his hand. Stop it! You're acting like a damn child. Just keep talking and have a good time. "Ahem. So uh how've you been after the party?"

"Good! Thanks for asking. I ran into a model agency and I also got a job to be a model in a book signing and…" He smiled big. "Next year, I'm going to be in a Historical drama TV show!"

Zack nearly choked on his beer. "Wow! You're going to be on TV? Holy shit Hyun you're full of accomplishments today!"

"I know! After the party I saw myself in the mirror and I just knew that I had been glowing. Practically sparkling where ever I go!" He gave a breathy laugh.

"Right, okay Cullen calm down."

"Ha ha! I'm not THAT bad."

The two laughed and talked about random topics and the RFA itself. It seemed Hyun knew to avoid talking about V. Good. The further he pushed down the pain the better.

Night had fallen. Hyun looked over at Zack worried as he downed another can of beer. "Are you sure you should opening another one? That makes eight cans already."

"Whaaat?" Zack looked up and sniffed. "I'm fine! I'll compa- compen- compensate you later." He hiccuped as he downed another full can gasping as a huge grin plastered his face.

"Shit." Hyun mumbled as he put his phone away.

"Whaddya doin' ova there?"

"…I'm trying to call V."

Zack froze and frowned deeply. "Whaddya doin' that for?"

"Zack I need help taking you home."

"Home?! He doesnn wan me there."

"What makes you say that?" Hyun tilted his head as his soft silver hair, that he had let down, gently swayed under the air conditioner.

"I told 'im that I *hiccup* lub 'im. And he rejected me. Says he ain't gonna lub me back." Zack felt his body slump forward and quickly he snapped himself back nearly falling back onto the floor.

Hyun stayed silent for a long time. "You love him?"

"I do…I lu-lo-love him sooooo much." He circled his arms in the air trying to show how much he cared. "But he ain't gonna get rid of 'er."

Hyun swallowed. He looked away and drummed his fingers against the table. "You really were too kind to him. I always thought…you two had something special. I saw how you looked at him, watching with this look on your face."

Zack looked at Hyun and narrowed his eyes. "Well aren't you the king of relationships. Got the looks and the knowledge eh?" Zack scoffed and reached out for another beer. "It was hopeless." He rested his head on his arm as he spun another empty can around on the table. "To hopeless. I ruined it. I was just happy to be there by his side and I got too greedy. Now look at what I've done." He groaned as his head started to pound. "I'm draggin' you into it and wort I insulted ya like a douche."

Hyun frowned and flipped open his phone. He started calling someone else. "Hey. Trust Fund. Think you can get your driver to take Zack over to V's? …. What? He just left from there? … Yeah. Contact V and tell him Zack's drunk…Seriously! It's not my fault!…Ugh! Can you do it or not?…Good." Hyun sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Honestly. Why do you have to be so damn difficult all the time?…No I don't want to see that cat's pictures….No! Don't put them on the RFA! You'll kick up my allergies!…I said no!—what the? He hung up on me!" Hyun looked at Zack who was resting his head on his arms sleeping.

V^V^V^V^V^V

There was a knock on the door. V had just gotten off the phone with Jumin hearing that Zack had drank too much. That boy…I hope he's okay. Jumin didn't say where he was or who was bringing him. What if he was at some bar and someone tried to mug him? Or what if some person tried to take advantage of him?

V opened the door to see Hyun holding him up by shoulder and belt loop. "Hey." He said flatly.

"Hand him to me." They shifted Zack into V's arms.

"He just needs rest. He drank at least 10 cans."

"Why would you let him drink so much?!"

"I normally wouldn't but he seemed like he needed it. Plus I eventually stared giving the light stuff." Hyun looked at V directly in the eye. So he knew what had happened. "What are you going to do about him?"

"…I gave him…an answer."

"A proper one?"

"…"

"You need to tell him exactly what you feel. You're too kind and it's leading him on. V, haven't you noticed those sorrowful looks he gives you?"

V widened his eyes. "What?"

"He always looks so sad and hurt when you look or talk about Rika. He looks like his heart is shattering and your the one who keeps breaking it. You need to properly tell him what you think. Or else…you could really hurt his feelings. I'm not trying to reprimand you, I just… Zack's my friend too. I hate to see him get hurt day after day. I don't want you to loose such a good friend." Hyun rubbed the back of his neck and sighed. "Do you need help putting him to bed?"

"…No I got it."

"Okay. I'm calling you both tomorrow okay?"

"Yes, Hyun, thank you for caring. And for telling me…" V glanced at Zack's sleeping face.

"Right. Get good sleep."

"You to. Get home safely. Text me when you are."

"Right."

V closed the door and carried Zack to his bedroom.

'Haven't you noticed the sorrowful looks he gives you? He looks like his heart is shattering and your the one who keeps breaking it.' V reached out to pet Zack's hair and then froze. Why do I keep trying to touch him? He rubbed his eyes and sighed as he watched the younger man snore softly.

I can't… I can't hurt someone I care about again. I won't turn a blind eye to your sadness like I did…like I did to my beloved… V clutched his heart. I won't hurt you Zack, I won't ever let myself do that to you. V smiled painfully. "I cherish you too much Zachary. You don't deserve this."

^V^V^V^V^V^

Zack awoke the next morning with a massive hangover. "Shit…where am I?" He looked around to see he was in his room. "How?" Suddenly the memories of the kiss and going to Hyun's house resurfaced in his mind. "Crap!" Zack jumped out of bed ignoring the pounding headache and nauseous feeling in his throat. "V!?" Zack ran into the living room and froze.

…

…

Why…?

Zack picked up a note on the counter.

"I'm sorry I hurt you so much. Please forgive me. The apartment is yours Zack."

He looked at the barren walls, the empty shelves, and V's empty room. Only one picture was left behind. A picture of V and him smiling under a fully bloomed cherry blossom tree. On the back it said, 'He doesn't like taking pictures. But he has such a beautiful and joyous smile. Thank you Zack'

Zack fell to his knees clutching the picture. He didn't even cry. He couldn't. The only thing he felt was his body falling into a deep void.

Why would you hurt me so much? How cruel… All I wanted was to tell you I love you… Why did I have to fall in love with you?