I do not own the characters, i am just playing with them.
Again I apologize for short update, I really appreciate the reviews you have given also! I wrote this next installment between class today, I just couldn't help myself, I needed a study break. :)
After picking up take out for lunch Ranger returned me to my apartment and walked me to my door silently. I stopped outside the door, one hand on the door knob and looked at him sincerely.
I wanted to tell him I was sorry, that I was confused, that I didn't know how to fit him into my complex, disorderly mind now that he was at the forefront of all my thoughts.
Ranger and I had always had an unconventional relationship to one another, one that had no perfect category to file it into and be able to reach plausible conclusions or results to determine it. Nothing about Ranger was categorizable. Sure, you could predict his wardrobe mostly, it was black. You could predict his food choices often as well, they were healthy. What you couldn't predict was his emotions; the only emotion I knew to predict was protective, he would keep me safe at all costs to him and his men at Rangeman. For that I know he loved me, but in what way I could not tell.
"You've had a long morning Babe."
He stopped and I got the feeling there was more on his mind, more than he wanted to say out loud. But this was Ranger, he didn't wear his emotions on his sleeve, he was composed, the silent type, he was Batman, immune to predictable human displays of emotions. Don't get me wrong, I know he felt emotions; he just didn't broadcast them to the world.
It was only in his eyes that I could see there was more; the rest of him was hard set, sturdy, statute.
This statement of his though was almost a warning, was he afraid of what might come out of my mouth if I were to speak right now? Did he not want to know what I was trying to say? Who am I kidding? I didn't even know what I wanted to say.
I wanted to push him away and I wanted to throw my arms around his neck and make him lose that composed aura, that cold defense stance he currently held.
But I knew if I lost my control, so would he. We've been in similar situations before, Ranger would not make the first move, he would be patient and wait for my okay. Once I gave that okay there was no going back, not for either of us. Our attraction was always evident, never hidden from ourselves or others. Not because we wanted it to show, but because it just did naturally.
I had even become part of the Rangeman staff lunchroom conversation; not because I had a knack of blowing up vehicles or getting myself into peculiar binds in which they were assigned to get me out of. I am sure those facts helped, but were not the most intriguing discussion. No, I was the conversation because there boss kept every bit of his personal life personal, except me. Rangeman had a personal task force and itemized budget labeled "Stephanie" for me. And I was the one non-work related possession that Ranger let them see.
Possession, the word froze on my mind, was I just a possession of entertainment? Was I his possession? That thought should scare the hell out of me…. I am not something to be possessed. Stephanie! Snap out of it, Ranger didn't think of me that way, he never told me I couldn't do something, he always was supportive and simply made sure I was safe in doing whatever harebrained idea I had.
I often resented his overbearing and privacy defying activities towards me, but if I were being honest to myself, I appreciated it, I liked knowing he had my back and the only comment made was a comical, endearing, or sometimes frustrated "Babe".
I realized we had been standing there for quite some time at this point. It was getting a little uncomfortable.
"You're right, I need a shower." I addressed my mud caked clothing.
The mud had dried by now and was beginning to flake off.
Ranger smiled at this, his eyes even lit up as the corners of his mouth rose.
"I was just starting to get use to the mud wrestling look. You sure you need to wash it off? I don't mind a little dirt."
He brushed his thumb across my cheek and a clump of dirt fell from it. My cheek burned where his hand had been, but my mind couldn't convey what I wanted to say still. All I could do was smile. I turned toward my door and with a final look over my shoulder I gave what was probably a seductive smile and replied,
"And who's the dirty one now?"
I caught a glance of his 200 watt smile and small shake of his head before I closed the door behind me and sunk to the floor against it.
I listened to the hallway and wondered what was going through his mind as he stood still one last long moment before heading off down the hallway.
I signed and my hamster Rex poked his head out from his soup can on the counter to look at me.
"What? Would you rather me have invited him in?" I asked.
He twitched his whiskers and returned to the shelter of his soup can. If only I could hide from life like Rex does, not always, but in moments like this I sure wished