SIX
"Mm…whasawhermi?"
"Dad!" Alexis was the first to react to the incoherent mumblings of the man in the hospital bed. "Dad! You're awake!"
As she slowly stood, Kate did not share Alexis's joy. Barely an hour had passed since her professions of love and it appeared the sleeping man was finally beginning to stir. That should have been a good thing and, in some ways, it was, but she could not help but worry. Were they about to see the new, post-explosion Richard Castle?
"Wherami?" he mumbled again.
Cautiously, Kate stepped up beside him and placed her hand on his arm. "Rick? Can you hear us?"
His eyes flashed open and he looked in her direction. She could see them red-rimmed and almost bloodshot, but she could also see that he wasn't focusing on her. His gaze danced around her face almost as though he was looking through her rather than at her.
"Where am I?" he managed more clearly that time.
"The hospital." She replied.
"Where?"
"The hospital. There was an explosion in the bank and you were pulled from the rubble."
His eyes shut. "Why?"
Kate looked over at Alexis, whose brow wrinkled. "Dad," she said, "they rescued you. Dad? Dad!"
But he responded no more, not even when Alexis's shook his shoulder. Finally, after a minute, she gave up and looked at Kate rather helplessly. "What happened?"
She shook her head, unable to explain. "I'll go tell the nurses."
She'd barely taken two steps when Alexis stopped her by speaking her name. "This is a good sign, right?" the young girl asked. "He's speaking so that must be good."
"I wish I knew." Kate replied, still unsettled by the event.
Thirty minutes later, after speaking with the neurologist, Kate did not feel she or Alexis had any better understanding of what was going on. The doctor explained Castle's momentary conversation away as the brain attempting to reset itself after the trauma. The writer most likely was not fully conscious and probably did not even recognize them for who they were at the time. As they spoke, Kate studied Castle's face hoping he would wake up for real, but he never did. In the end, the doctor decided to give the writer yet another cranial scan.
After he was wheeled away, Kate suggested they go and get something to eat, but on their way to the elevator they were intercepted by Ryan and Esposito, who had arrived both to give updates on the situation at the bank, and to find out how Castle was doing. When Kate briefed them, Ryan reacted similarly to Alexis.
"Speaking to you guys—that's definitely a good sign, right?" he asked.
Kate merely shook her head. "We don't know yet. The doctor did not seem too encouraged to be honest."
"Doctors? What do they know?" Esposito quipped.
"Have they made their way through the safety deposit box vault yet? Do you know if they found my grandmother?" Alexis asked impatiently.
Ryan momentarily looked confused before looking over at Esposito and then finally to Kate, who shook her head softly. His expression softening, he turned to the girl. "Alexis, I'm so sorry. There were no other survivors in the vault."
Alexis took a half step back from him. "But…was she in there? Maybe she was somewhere else? Maybe she-"
"I'm sorry," Ryan said again. "All the hostages were accounted for. I didn't personally see your grandmother, but I spoke to the CO on site and he told me. But you know what? I'll, ah, I'll call Laine right now and see where they're at with the ID process, okay?"
While he stepped away, Kate turned to Esposito. "Are they still digging through everything?"
He nodded. "It'll be days before they sort through it all. They had just uncovered the rest of the safety deposit vault when I was there. Then they were going to focus on the main vault, but to be honest there isn't much of that left; just shrapnel. I'm not sure we'll find the robbers. Might not be anything left bigger than a-"
"Espo!"
"Sorry." He apologized quickly to the wide-eyed young girl.
"You…you said they uncovered the vault." She began softly. "So…so do they know how they died then? My gran and the others? Did they suffocate?"
Esposito looked to Kate for permission before continuing. She nodded, and the detective spoke directly to the red-head. "Now this is strictly hearsay, not officially confirmed, but they told me that the vault door was damaged by the blast. Not destroyed, but damaged—enough to off seat it slightly from its secure hinging."
"So they would have had air?" Alexis asked. "Then why did only my dad survive?"
Espo shook his head. "No way to know that at this time. We don't even know if the others died from suffocation. We'll know more after the autopsies."
A moment later, Ryan returned to their conversation. "Spoke with Lanie. They're still getting things organized at the morgue, but she thinks they'll begin the ID process later this evening. Families will then be called in to ID."
"I can go now." Alexis responded immediately.
Ryan shook his head rather sadly. "You can't; you're only seventeen."
"For fifteen more days! Jesus!" She proclaimed.
"We will make sure she's identified." Esposito promised the girl.
"But I want to see her!"
"And you can," Kate chimed in. "Just not tonight."
Clearly irritated, Alexis turned on her heel and stalked back to the writer's hospital room. Kate turned to her colleagues with a rather helpless expression.
"She'll be okay," Ryan said reassuringly.
Kate shook her head. "I'm worried about Castle. They've been talking about neurological damage all day and now that he woke up and didn't recognize us…if he doesn't know her then-"
"Hey," Ryan said, placing a hand on her shoulder. "This is Castle we're talking about; that man defies the odds."
"Kevin's right." Esposito continued. "If anyone can pull through this it's him."
Kate smiled at the reassurance she didn't know she needed. "Thanks."
"Oh look...a welcomin' party."
Kate and Alexis both gasped when they heard the light, albeit slightly tired, voice of the writer. Kate whipped around from her position by the hospital room's window and saw him sitting partially upright in the bed being wheeled back into the room by two orderlies. Alexis didn't even wait until the bed was back into its proper position before flinging herself at her father and locking her arms around his neck.
"DAD!"
"Hey pumpkin'," he said, patting her awkwardly with his IV filled right hand.
Completely astonished at what she was witnessing, Kate remained frozen by the windows. In the ten minutes since her partners left her head had been running through worst case scenarios about Castle having brain damage or amnesia from his harrowing ordeal. She imagined horrific scenarios in which he did not recognize her or Alexis, but yet they had to take him home and try to take care of him. She was almost near the point of tears right before he'd arrived.
Still baffled, Kate turned to the male nurses with an expression pleading for any explanation. The taller of the two merely shrugged. "He woke up as we were putting him into the scanner so we pulled him out and called the doctor. He said to bring him back to the room and we did; he'll be here shortly to do an exam."
Kate thanked them distantly before taking two tentative steps towards the still embracing father-daughter duo. Alexis was burying her tear-stained cheeks further and further into her father's hospital gown while Castle had managed to lift up both arms to hug her back. "You're okay, you're okay." The girl sobbed out again and again.
"'course I am." He replied with a level of casualty that only Richard Castle could pull off after a near-death experience.
After a full minute Kate finally became brave enough to step up to the edge of the bed. She kept waiting for it—waiting for the shoe to drop. Waiting for him to think that Alexis had a different name, or that they were actually located somewhere in Russia, but it never happened. Was it possible that the doctors had been wrong about the brain damage? Could the writer really be…fine?
Terrified, but still wanting to test her theory, she spoke in a hoarse tone, "Rick?"
The man slid his head to the side of the pillow so he could look at her around the pile of orange hair against his face. The corner of his lip that she could see turned upwards. "Kate." He lowered his right hand from Alexis's back and held it out to her. She placed her fingertips into his palm and he closed his hand around them.
"Hi," was all she could manage at that moment.
His grip on her hand got a little tighter. "Hi."
She fought to keep a stray tear from escaping her eye so she turned her head towards the wall to shield that side of her face from view. Clearing her throat she asked, "Do...do you, um, remember what happened?"
Alexis released her father from her death grip and instead sat on the side of the bed at his hip. Both women gazed curiously at the man's face as his eyes darted back and forth and his brow wrinkled.
"The bank…the C-4 exploded?" he said finally, though the statement sounded more like a guess.
Kate almost laughed; that was an understatement. "It really exploded. Rick-"
But before she could detail too much, the neurologist entered the room and said, "Well hello Mr. Castle. Welcome back." He pulled out an iPad with the writer's information and reviewed it briefly. "I just have some routine questions for you. Do you know where you are?"
"Hospital."
"What is your full name?"
"Richard Alexander Edgar Rodgers Castle."
The doctor looked up from his tablet, obviously perplexed look on his face. He glanced over at Kate who gave him a single nod, confirming that the answer, while a mouthful, was an accurate one. With a shrug, the neurologist turned back to his device and asked, "Birth date?"
"April first, seventy-one."
"And today's date...or the date you went into the bank will be sufficient," he said.
For the first time, Castle hesitated before answering. He shut his eyes and pursed his lips. "I…it was a Monday...October...ninth?" he guessed.
Kate smiled; he was only off by a day, which was fairly good for his usual average. To the doctor, she explained, "In fairness, he doesn't usually know the date."
Castle shook his head. "That's true; I don't."
The neurologist chuckled. "Ok, Mr. Castle; you passed the test. I still want to do another scan in a little bit, but for now you can visit with your family."
Castle thanked the man and, once he was gone, turned back to the faces of the women who lined either side of him. With his right hand still intertwined with Kate's, he brought up his left to brush against Alexis's arm. The young girl turned and captured his hand with hers, bringing it to her face and kissing each of his knuckles. He remained silent for several moments before gasping suddenly.
"Oh! Where's mother? Is she in this hospital or...is...she...oh." Castle's voice drifted off when Alexis's bottom lip began to tremble and the gentle smile evaporated from Kate's face.
"Dad." Alexis began tearfully, but there was no need. The ever observant writer understood the situation. He dropped Kate's hand and opened up his arms to her, allowing his daughter to collapse into them again.
"It's okay, Alexis." He held her tight for a moment before looking up to Kate for more of an explanation. "What happened to her? Shrapnel from the explosion?"
Kate shrugged, wishing she could give him a better answer. "We don't know yet, but Rick." She paused to take in a deep breath. She didn't want to tell him. She wanted him to rest, recover, and be awake for more than ten minutes before she weighed him down with the burden of reality, but doing so would not have been fair. She knew him; she knew her partner. She knew that he would want to know and she could not blame him, for if the situations were reversed she would want to know as well.
"What?" he asked when she'd been silent a few seconds too long.
"You…you were the only survivor."
Immediately, his face flushed and his arms around Alexis's back went slack. "I...only...Beckett?"
Her heart wrenched at his wrinkled brow and at the pain she saw reflected back in his eyes. She shook her head quickly. "I'm sorry, I wish I could tell you more, but that's all we know right now—they're still assessing the scene. I don't want to speculate."
Despite Alexis's weight on top of him, he attempted to sit up in bed. When he winced in agony both women jumped in to scold him simultaneously. He held up his hand to silence them, and took a moment to catch his breath. Alexis remained seated beside him rather than on top of him and he was able to sit up with a straighter spine. "Beckett it's me—speculate."
Kate nodded. "This isn't my theory, just what Espo got from the men at the scene—off the record. The best guess at this time is that the safety deposit vault saved you all from the blast, but because it was a sealed vault…" Though his brain must still have been sluggish, the writer's eyes lit with understanding as her voice trailed off.
"How long were we in there?"
"Twenty-seven hours."
"Jesus." He cursed, rolling his head back against the pillows. His eyes remained close for a few moments and when he opened them he looked down at his body and hands, as though he was almost surprised they still existed. "But I…"
"You were barely alive when they pulled you out." Kate informed him gently. "Apparently the blast had off seated the vault door from its hinging, but not enough to fill the space with oxygen—or so we're getting at this time."
While he looked at her wide-eyed, Alexis wound her arms around his neck again. "We were so worried, Dad."
Nodding to her partner, Kate backed her way away from the bed. "I'll give you two a minute. I want to text the boys, anyway."
Kate turned and walked from the room without looking back. As she crossed the threshold and shut the door behind her, she pulled out her phone and tapped out a quick message in the group chat with her colleagues Ryan and Esposito. The former's response was a rapid, Thank God. Esposito's took another minute until he replied with, Unbelievable; the man isn't human.
The detective chuckled at the message. There had been many a day when she questioned whether or not the writer was a real person or a cartoonish character sent to planet Earth to annoy her, but in that moment she could not have be happier for any—even an absurd—explanation.
"He wants to see you."
"Hmm?" Kate started from her position leaning against the wall. She had been texting with her father, Captain Gates, Lanie and several others in rapid succession. It was no surprise that they were all thrilled to hear the writer was alert after overcoming seemingly impossible odds. Looking up, she saw Alexis stepping out of Castle's hospital room, the tracks of dried tears still evident on her face.
"My dad wants to see you." The girl repeated.
Kate nodded, slipped her phone into her pocket, and pushed herself away from the wall. As she passed Alexis, she gave the girl's arm a squeeze. Then, she cautiously walked into the hospital room, half afraid the writer would have passed out and she would not get the chance to have a one-on-one conversation with him—something that, barely seven hours earlier, she didn't think would ever happen again.
Castle sat in bed, cautiously looking at the IVs attached to the back of his right hand. She stepped up beside him, slipped her hands in her back jean pockets and breathed, "Hey."
He looked up immediately. "Hey."
Shaking her head, she sighed, "I'm so sorry about your mom, Castle. She was a great lady; I'm sorry I didn't get to know her better."
He bobbed his head. "Thanks. I...I don't think it's sunk in yet. Everything's still a little hazy and I have a wicked headache." He brought his left hand up to rub his temple gingerly.
"You need to rest."
"I will. Alexis said you were taking care of her?"
Kate's face flushed and she dipped her chin. "Oh, hardly. I stayed with her at the loft last night and I will until you can come home—you don't have to worry-but the boys are helping, too."
"Thank you."
The level of gratitude in his voice made it seem as though she had dug through the wreckage with her bare hands in order to pull him free. (Which, in hindsight, had she had any inkling he was alive beneath the rubble she absolutely would have done.) Kate didn't think what she was doing as all that heroic. Actually, she didn't think about it at all. No question existed in her mind; it simply was what needed to be done. "What are partners for?"
He hummed and allowed his eyes to drift shut. "Take Alexis home please."
Kate almost laughed. "Oh I don't think she'll be leaving your side any time soon." In fact, she was shocked the girl had even agreed to leave for the duration of their conversation.
Castle shook his head. "No, I told her to go. She looks exhausted."
"Don't think either of us slept very much last night."
He grunted in response.
"We might be able to come back a little later?" she offered. True, it was getting late in the evening and regular visiting hours would be over, but her badge could do incredible things.
Sluggishly, the writer waived his hand at her. "No, no. Stay home, rest. Come back tomorrow."
She could hear lethargic tone in his voice and realized he was getting tired. He had been fairly alert for over half an hour, so this made perfect sense, yet it also scared her. What if they left and he went back to sleep and something went wrong? What if he never regained consciousness again? Rationally, she knew this was unlikely, but still she feared, so she said carefully, "Only if you promise us not to go anywhere."
Though his eyes were still shut, a grin crossed his face. "Mmm you can cuff me to the bed if you like."
And there he was—the Richard Castle she thought she'd never see again. Smirk on his face, joke on his lips. Years earlier, it would have made her want to punch him, but in that moment, it nearly made her break down.
God, oh god. He wasn't dead. He was there, alive. His body wasn't damaged; his mind was whole. He was laying there able to joke with her and—god—she had underestimated how good that would make her feel; how relieved.
"I-I'm glad you're okay, Castle."
She tried to make those her parting words, tried to keep her voice strong and even, but of course she had failed. Her voice waivered at several points and her breath had hitched just as she said his name. Before she could take even half a step away, his eyes popped open and he suddenly seemed more alert than before.
"Hey, hey—don't cry over me. I'm fine." He lifted his left arm and reached out, beckoning her closer. "C'mere."
A betraying tear slipping down her cheek, she stepped closer and his arm slid against hers until he could cup her elbow and pull her in. Just as Alexis had done, she leaned down over him and gave him as best a hug she could while he lay in the bed, still surrounded by wires and tubes. She sunk against him, feeling his warm chest beneath hers and almost let go entirely and broke down into full sobs, but she managed to keep herself in check knowing that in a moment she had to join Alexis in the hallway. She gutted her way through the hug and even managed to offer a fractured smile when she slid out of his embrace.
"We'll, um, see you tomorrow. Can we bring you anything?"
Castle glanced down at himself, and then back up at her. "Pants?"
Despite her remaining tears, Kate let out a breathy laugh. "Pants; okay. You got it. See you, Castle."
He smiled as he watched her go. "Until tomorrow, Kate."