A/N- I had originally intended for this to be a one-shot since I have another story in mind for this fandom. However, everyone keeps following this story and seems enamored in it. I kept thinking and thinking.. And I came up with a part 2. So I decided to do a short follow up where Feyre gets to break free of Tamlin forever. If I write my next story, the events that I set up here in this ficlet will end up being the foundation for it. Happy reading!
Love,
SWF95
A/N 2- So I rewrote this and drew the plot out a bit. The missing bit is a new chapter that comes after this! It looks like this is gonna have like 5 or 6 chapters or so. Maybe just 4. I have no idea. This turned into a major undertaking!
Feyre
Today was the day.
I was so ready to rid myself of Tamlin. Every touch made my skin crawl. When he crawled in my bed with me at night, I had to shut myself down completely just to be able to function and do what he required of me. I always locked my mind away, to spare my mate the details of another male being permitted to do these things to me.
Rhysand. Rhys. He had kept me sane these past few months. I would never have been able to make it through without him, he kept me strong. Every morning we would strengthen each other for the day through our bond. Every day we spoke words of encouragement to each other.
But I longed to have him near me. I longed to allow him to touch me, to rid me of the horrible months of having to take another male when all I wanted was my mate. To remind me that he, too, had done every single thing in his power out of love for his people. Our people.
I was the High Lady of the Night Court.
And today my revenge would be complete.
~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~
Tamlin was no better than he had been previously. I had to sneak around if I wanted information about his movements, about the war. Yet, that made it easier in a way. I never regretted any of the sneaking, the times I broke into his study, any of it. Every day, before Tamlin came to my room, I wrote down everything I'd learned and sent it to Rhys.
If it hadn't been so frightening, Tamlin's rage would have almost been funny. He interrogated the servants, the warriors, even Lucien. No one was exempt from his wrath.
Except me.
Except his pretty, pretty, Fae princess. His quiet, complacent, frightened little Lady.
He never suspected that the information leak he tried so desperately to find and destroy was sharing his bed at night.
I had spent months left to my own devices, alone, using little drabbles of my power as often as possible to help keep me from going completely mad. If I hadn't been able to talk to Rhys, I would have lost myself in the horrid depression that had claimed me the last time I had lived in that house.
Rhys was clearly worried about me, no matter how much he tried to hide it. I was losing bits of myself each day.
~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~
Within two months, Tamlin began to leave me alone at night again. The first time he did, I tossed and turned, managing to wake Rhysand with the loneliness I couldn't contain any longer.
Feyre, darling, are you alright?
I can't stop thinking Rhys, I can't stop being afraid. I didn't need to say more, Rhys could read my fears through our bond.
You know you can come home to me any time this becomes too much. I breathed easier at the almost hopeful tone to his voice. It would be many years before I could feel cleansed of what I've done here, before I could feel worth my mate's perfect love again.
I know. But I also know I'm more useful to our people here. I could feel his disagreement through our bond.
Not much longer, he simply reveled in our bond for a few moments. Suddenly, he spoke again. Can you go outside? I caught on to his idea as he said it. I smiled genuinely for the first time in months.
Soon, I was quietly making my way outside with a pillow and a blanket. To where I could see the stars. My heart filled with joy as I saw the night sky again. I felt a joy mirroring my own on the other side of the bond. Rhys had gone outside too. Curiously, I slipped into his mind as I looked up at the night sky, to see if his sky was the same as mine.
His mind welcomed mine with love and joy, showing me a night sky similar to mine.
And yet, it was so much more beautiful. The blues and purples deeper, the stars brighter, the galaxies and nebulae more vivid and visible.
It was home.
Beautiful, isn't it? He said with a smile I could feel. He felt my silent agreement.
Home, I repeated.
~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~
Three months ago, Lucian had finally cornered me. Tamlin had left him there to care for me while he was gone, and, as usual, I had cuddled up with my blanket out under the stars. Lucian had followed me there.
"What are you after, Feyre, I know something's not right with you."
"Who says I'm after anything?" I replied, curious.
"I'm not stupid, Feyre," he leveled a look at me, "And I know what a mate bond feels like. I know that there's no way you'd be this… functional, if it was broken, even after this time." Rhys was mirroring my rising alarm. I simply allowed my eyebrows to creep further up my forehead.
To my surprise, Lucian actually chuckled. "Cauldron, you look like Rhysand when you do that, you two are a matched set."
I froze. Rhys was silent for a moment before I felt him doubled over, laughing so hard he couldn't breathe. Tell him, Rhys suggested.
You think we can trust him? I asked.
I think he is a decent guy with a not so decent friend and High Lord. I think he trusted Tamlin too far, and I think his blind loyalty is a major fault. And I think he's a guy I can sympathize with, since he probably misses Elain so badly it physically hurts him. I don't think that even being removed from the Autumn Court was worth the things he had to do to you, his friend, and to his people. I looked at Lucian again, the grin had faded slightly. I gave him my best impression of the cold Dark High Lord Rhys for a moment before grinning back.
"You almost broke Rhys," I replied finally, "I mean, I'm sure laughter is a great way to go, but I kind of need him around." Lucian's eyes widened imperceptibly.
"I knew there was no way he could break that bond."
"Why are you doing this?" I asked him.
"For Elain," he said, predictably. I was silent, inviting him to continue. "For Elain, and for the rest of the people here. We just got out from under Amarantha, another tyrant would destroy us. What happened Under the Mountain brought out the worst in Tam. He didn't used to be quite that bad, but guilt has turned him into a monster."
"Guilt?" I replied dubiously, feeling Rhys backing up my thought.
"Guilt," Lucian said firmly, "He did think that he did what was best for you Under the Mountain, fearing that if she knew what would hurt him most she would do it repetitively. But he didn't do enough, he didn't do everything, and he knows it. And worse, he knows that Rhysand did do everything, and he knows that you know that. That's why he wanted you to marry him so quickly, that's why he tried so hard to keep you out of the Night Court, and that's why he tried to keep you out of Rhysand's hands.
"None of us, however," he added ruefully, "accounted for the thought that you two could be mates. He managed to convince the rest of us that Rhys had you under a spell. Until the day I saw you in those Illyrian forests. I saw you, and I saw you stand next to him, powerful and without fear. In that moment, I realized that you were there because you wanted to be, because you belonged with him in whatever capacity. But Tamlin wouldn't listen. He told me Rhys had fooled me too, and that we needed to get you back."
I was silent. Stunned. I could feel Rhys's emotions, so similar to mine in this moment. I asked him a question and he agreed as I asked it.
I looked Lucien in the eye.
And dropped the glamour on my right hand. A small smile curled around the edges of his lips at the blue tattoo that adorned it.
"I am the High Lady of the Night Court," I told him quietly.
"High Lady?" Lucian said quietly, shocked.
"Yes," I told him, "The night before what happened in Hybern, Rhys had me sworn in as his equal, his lady. If you go to the Night Court, Rhys or one of the members of our Court will find you and bring you to a place where you might be able to help us fix all of this."
"Is Elain there?" he asked quietly, desperately.
"Yes," I replied, just as quietly, "My sisters have been acclimating to their Fae bodies. They've been taken care of. And don't worry too much about Nesta. Just be kind to Elain, and respect her. Nesta will eventually calm down a bit."
He simply nodded. I didn't have to tell him that his best hope for reconciliation with my sister lay with refusing to side with the creature who had destroyed me with an almost aggressive inattention to my needs, the creature who had turned her into something she was never meant to be. Without a word, he winnowed away.
Next I heard, he showed up on the battlefield standing next to Cassian, wearing Illyrian fighting leathers and knives.
Tamlin had wrecked the entire manor that night. Even as I hid from his wrath, I smiled.
~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~0~
Over the next two months after Lucian left, Rhys kept asking me to come home, but I replied the same way each time: I was the most useful here. I was only useful here. In the end, he did as he always had and respected my decision. A heady thing in the elaborate prison Tamlin had reconstructed.
I had no idea what I was going to be at the end of this mess. I could feel a darkness in my soul unrelated to my powers that was only kept at bay by my purpose. The hole in my heart was carving itself back out. Without my purpose to protect my people, I had no idea what I would become. I knew Rhys could feel it too, and that was why he kept asking me to come home. He was frightened for me.
Part of me still wondered if Rhys would still want me after this. After all, it's one thing to do as Rhys did: allowing himself to become Amarantha's whore to save the friends and people who he loved with his entire self. Yet he did not leave a mate for it. He did not willingly leave his mate to go warm the bed of some other male in order to spy on him. I did. I left my Rhys to become Tamlin's whore. Trading my body and self respect for his secrets. For the good of my people. For my sisters. For Velaris. For the Rainbow.
Yet again, I thought of my real family. Of Mor and Az and Cassian and Amren. Of my sisters waiting in Velaris for me. Of Lucian who made the right choice at last.
I thought of the Rainbow, a place where light and life and art prospered and was protected. I thought of Starfall, and the joy on Rhysand's face when I painted that star on his hand. I thought of the lengths my High Lord went to protect his people.
And, like my High Lord before me, I decided that I didn't care what I became at the end, so long as the people I loved were spared.
Today it would all end.
The King of Hybern was destroyed. The war was over. And The Night Court was coming to sack the Spring manor.