THE VEIL

Chapter 15

14th February 1981– The L Word

Hermione for the first time almost felt relief as the veil enveloped her. She could not bear to see what she saw in Sirius's silver grey eyes. She feared that he would see the guilt that she felt like drowning in. She felt fake for joking with them about the attack by the Death Eaters. She had always hated lying. Yet she seemed to be forced into it, and had become very good at it. She had spent all of third year lying to Ron and Harry about her classes. She knew it was necessary if she wanted to complete all the classes she had picked, yet she hated it every time they tried to ask her. Her friends were not stupid. Neither were any of the people she had since befriended. She hoped that one day she would be honest, and that they would forgive her. The grey swirled around her. The whispering drew nearer she felt the wind pull her. Was she ready to see them yet? She had no choice, she watched as the greys changed to colour, sweeping her back into the world.

"Are you sure you sure Black?" Lily asked Sirius as she finished doing up the strap on her shoe. She was dressed up nicely in a navy evening dress, for once not having marks and baby spit up on it. James walked into the living room fixing his tie. Sirius had come around that morning and had finally convinced the pair to go out and enjoy Valentine's Day together, and he would babysit his godson for them. It would be the very first time that he would be alone with the baby, and Lily was worried, Harry could become a handful really fast. Harry had already made it through many milestones and being a magical child managed to float himself around the house, frequently getting himself into mischief.

"I will be fine with him." Sirius said, he was holding Harry in his arms and Harry currently had a handful of Sirius's hair in each hand pulling on it, giggling. "Pad-pad! Woof!"
Lily smiled at her son, "Ok, Dinner is in the icebox. I have written the instructions on the lid. Don't give him any chocolate, or sweets. And don't let him stay up too late. It will make him grouchy tomorrow. And-"
James put his arm around Lily, "Lils, love, Padfoot will be fine. He knows Harry's routine. But we need to go or we will be late for our reservation."
"Say bye-bye to daddy and mummy" Sirius pointed to his parents. Lily gave Harry a kiss on the cheek and James messed his hair, and Sirius's too for good measure.
"Have a good night. If I need anything James has the mirror. It will be fine Evans, go and have a great date." Sirius shooed them out. Sirius stood in the doorway with Harry waving goodbye as they disapparated just outside their front gate.

"Come on short stuff. Let's go and work out how to not burn your dinner." Sirius turned and shut the door. As the door closed a whispering breeze slipped through. Sirius spun around and followed it. The curtains in the living room fluttered, wings fluttered, Hermione backed out of the curtains trying to untangle herself.
"See you even have a fairy godmother!" Sirius grinned to Harry. Harry's eyes lit up at the sparkling wings, reaching to grab them, from across the room. Hermione had looked up and spun around at Sirius's voice. She saw Harry in his arms. Harry had grown quite a lot since her last visit. His hair, like his dad's black and stuck up all over. He was reaching out to Hermione, her heart swelled at the infant.
"Hello Harry." She smiled at the little boy, before she turned her gaze into those grey eyes.
"Hello Sirius." She spoke softly.

"Pad-pad. Woof!" Harry pointed at Sirius, causing them both to laugh. He set Harry back on the rug with his toys, his favourite was the big furry stuffed dog. He moved towards her with a predatory grace and had her in his arms, kissing her before she could utter a word. He pulled away, smirking as her eyes tried to refocus.
"You in this outfit is definitely the best way I have seen you come back to me." He bent and kissed her again, stopping short as a toy collided into his head, Harry giggling at his feet.
"Pad-pad. Woof!" Waving his arms up at Sirius.
Hermione sniggered. "I think he wants his Padfoot. Where is Lily and James?"
"I forced them out on a date, being Valentine's Day and all." Sirius explained and picked up the giggling infant.

"It's Valentine's day? 1981?" Hermione asked her smile fading from her face, Sirius nodded. He looked at her concerned.
"Why don't you go and get changed into something more comfortable? Lily had put some clothes aside for you at Halloween and left them in the spare room I use."
Hermione nodded and left Sirius and Harry together. She stopped at the Hallway entrance as Sirius set Harry down. "OK. Pad-Pad Woof time" He transformed for his godson's amusement and lay down. Wuffing softly tail wagging. Harry could not contain his amusement putting his hand around his Pad-Pad and cackled as Padfoot turned and licked his godson on the cheek.

Hermione's eyes misted over at the sight. Harry had such a beautiful beginning, with everyone around him that loved him and would do absolutely anything for. She made her way down the hall to the spare room she remembered and entered. There was a wardrobe, stuffed with clothes for Sirius as he stayed over here almost as often he did his own apartment. There was a shelf not overstuffed, with some select clothing pieces for a female. Most of the pieces were new, some things Lily no longer wore. She went through and found a pair of skinny jeans, a top and sweater. She changed out of her costume, and pulled on the more comfortable clothes.
Walking back out to the living room, she found Padfoot and Harry playing pony. Padfoot stopped and looked at her. He "ruffed" at her appreciatively.

Sirius was extremely grateful that Hermione appeared when she did. She helped him with preparing and feeding Harry, which proved to be a challenge, both of them ending up with more food on them than they thought possible, thankful for magic in removing the splatters. She also made them both something for dinner, as he bathed Harry. She had adamantly refused to help with that, blushing. He had already made the connection that Hermione knew Harry in her time. Harry and Hermione would be almost the same age. And as she kept calling James Harry, Sirius knew that his son was the spitting image of his dad.

Hermione had dinner ready, waiting for Sirius. He was taking some time, as she had heard the bath drain. She made her way upstairs and quietly walked down to the nursery for Harry. Sirius was in the rocking chair with a very sleepy Harry telling him a story she recalled. It was the one that she had told to two little frightened boys, the moment that suddenly felt so long ago. Sirius finished the story and Harry yawned deeply. Hermione came in and picking up the infant, she began to sing the lullaby she had sung to Sirius when he was five. She rocked Harry gently as she sang softly.

Sirius could only sit and watch her with his godson, thinking if this would be like this if they could simply be together with one of their own. Yet he knew that the possibility most likely would not happen until, whatever the event was that brought her back so far into the past, so far back to him. He watched as she gently put the sleeping Harry into the crib, finishing the lullaby over him. She turned to him and there was a soft glow of peace on her face, something that was so rare to see on her. She walked over slowly and pulled him up kissing him softly and leading him out of the nursery.

They had enjoyed the dinner she prepared and were lazing on the couch together. She had her head on his lap, reading an old school textbook and he was reading one of Lily's muggle novels. The baby monitor that sat on the mantle above the fire indicated that Harry had woken up crying. Hermione sat up and stretched, "I'll go. You go put the kettle on." She said to him, and she walked up the stairs to settle Harry. Sirius stood and went out to the kitchen to make tea for them, when he heard two cracks of Lily and James returning earlier than anticipated. He rushed out and saw them, bloodied and dirty.

"What the hell happened?" He asked in surprise "You were supposed to be out at the movie by now!"
Lily slammed her bag down, still fuming "Oh I would have, except we were rudely interrupted when a pack of Death Eaters decided to pick a fight."

"YOU WERE MEANT TO GO OUT ON A DATE! NOT GO AND FIGHT THE FUCKING DEATH EATERS!" Sirius yelled at his best friend and his wife. The shock of their appearance, as well as the possibility that they may not have come back, with the fear that Harry could have been an orphan tonight scared him so much he yelled.
"LANGUAGE SIRIUS" Lily screamed at the same time James yelled
"WE WERE ON A BLOODY DATE! THEY ATTACKED US HALF WAY THROUGH OUR MEAL! I DIDN'T EVEN GET DESSERT"
"FUCKING ASSHOLES! Ruining a good night out before dessert!"

"BLACK! I'M WARNING YOU! LANGUAGE!" Lily yelled at him
"Why isn't Harry crying?" James asked worriedly.
"Because, I put a silencing charm around Harry's room when I heard you walked in." Hermione said, as she walked down the stairs looking at them as if torn between outrage, amusement and worry. She held up the baby monitor.
"He is still asleep so yell and rant all you want. I'll go make us all ice cream. As that seems to be the most upsetting thing to you all, not the fact that James needs to get his arm looked at and Lily needing ice on her ankle" She walked past all three of them and went out to the kitchen, floating out a bag of ice for Lily, and the medic kit for James. Lily sat and put the ice on her ankle sighing, as Sirius plucked the medic kit and started tending James, all stunned to silence.

After a minute Lily looked over to Sirius, "You better make her an honest woman one day Black. Or I will curse you to oblivion." She threatened. Sirius whipped around and checked Hermione wouldn't come out, pulling out a small box from his pocket tossing it to Lily, grinning devilishly "I have been planning to. Just the moment is never quite right."

Lily opened the box and her eyes widened. She snapped it shut and hid it as four bowls of ice creams with strawberry topping and wafers floated out preceding Hermione. She directed each of the bowls to everyone and sat on the armchair with her legs crossed. When none of them said anything she looked up, "Did I miss something? Or don't you like strawberry?" She asked, worried she selected the wrong topping; she kept clear of the chocolate topping internally shuddering at the sandwich memory.

"No Princess, it's perfect. Thank you for the dessert, and for settling Harry." Sirius answered his devilish smile directed at her and took a spoonful. Lily and James followed suit, still in shock over the revelation of Sirius wanting to propose.
"So Prongs, care to tell us about your date?" Sirius asked directing the attention away from him and Hermione. James told them about the date, that it was going swimmingly, both of them enjoying a night child free and able to enjoy each other's company. They were finishing their main course when Lily noticed the group outside. James seemed to think that the incident was merely a coincidence. As James continued his tale Hermione had stopped eating. She felt sick that they had been attacked out on a date doing something normal and carefree. She quietly stood and moved over to Lilys ankle and pulled off the bag of half melted ice, pulling out her wand whispering the healing spells she knew. Lily's ankle lost its bruising and swelling. Lily smiled thanks and tenderly flexed it feeling it was not going to hurt.

"Moody got there in time to help. Apparently they have been expecting an attack and most of the Order was on patrol tonight. Unfortunately they apparated away before we could capture any them." James finished, setting his bowl down.
Sirius frowned at his friend, "It doesn't make any sense though. From what we have seen of their attacks, this one seems like it was different."
"I think next time our dates will involve picnics in the backyard, where we are least likely to be attacked." Lily said. Her nerves from the night had started to show. She stood up and tenderly put weight on her ankle, not feeling any pain.
"You two staying tonight?" She asked. Sirius nodded. Hermione stood and flicked her wand sending the empty bowls and bag of melted ice out to the kitchen. They bid each other goodnight and headed to their beds, Lily checking on Harry on her way.

Sirius shut the door and paced. He was still processing what happened. Hermione watched him from the bed; she could see the stress written all over him. They were at war. A war she had read up on after her first year at Hogwarts when Harry had faced Voldemort. It was a brutal war, on both sides, yet the side against Voldemort, refused to acknowledge that they were ruining people's lives as much as the Death Eaters. Raiding homes in search of Dark objects, tearing parents from children. She had seen the results of the "good" side from Slytherin house in her timeline. She had once tried to explain it to Ron, but he shut her down saying that they had killed his uncles, Fabian and Gideon Prewett, as if it justified the treatment. She knew better than to say anything to Harry. He had lost everything because of the war and had been alone for so many years. She endeavoured to be impartial on it, but when your best friend is Harry Potter and had spent the majority of your school life being in danger of the Wizard that is out to kill your best friend, it clouds your judgement.

Hermione jumped when Sirius touched her, she was so wrapped in her thoughts of pasts and presents. He smirked at her reaction, stretching out onto the bed.
"You know when you think you frown ever so slightly," He teased her gently, "I would love to know what it is that can draw you so far away."
Hermione moved and lay beside him, her eyelashes lowered over her eyes, "I was merely contemplating what if's and what may haves."
Sirius raised an eyebrow at her as he absently combed a hand through her curls, "I am rather sure that a certain witch told a certain werewolf once that they should not dwell on those things."
Hermione chuckled, "The funny thing about advice is that it is always given freely, yet never practiced by the one whom has given it."
Sirius rolled so he was hovering over her, leaned in kissing her gently, small little kisses across her face, "Perhaps, you should take your advice and stop worrying so much on the what ifs and what may haves."
She smiled cheekily, "Or maybe someone can just help me forget the what ifs and what may haves for the night."

Sirius's face grinned devilishly, his eyes like molten silver. It was a sight that took Hermione's breath away. She had never seen a man so perfectly, so devastatingly handsome. She had never encountered such attention as what he showed her. Nor had she given herself her everything to anyone, yet she had to him. Her thoughts scattered as he captured her lips with his, after watching the little crease of a frown appear as her thinking took her from the present, his present. He pulled away when she was gasping.
"My Princess, as long as you never forget me I will help you forget which way is up." His voice was husky, and it did strange things to her heart beat.
"Then, by all means Mr Black." She said breathlessly. Sirius gave her another heart stopping smile and proceeded to do just that.

Hermione padded out to the kitchen the next morning, in another of Sirius's shirts, her curls sticking up in every direction; to get a glass of water, bumping into James. She hadn't expected anyone up as it was so early. Both blushed at the other. He was in a pair of red briefs and what seemed to be Lily's Kimono dressing gown, which barely covered him. Hermione immediately turned away, walking to the kitchen, James followed, trying not to look at how short the back of the shirt was, his blush deepening. Silently she pulled two glasses from the cupboard as he got the jug of water from the icebox, pouring them both a glass. They drank in silence, Hermione, trying and failing not to snigger. James snorted and both of them began to laugh at the ridiculousness of the moment.

Sirius padded out, his bed hair almost non-existent, smiled sleepily at them, grabbed himself a glass and poured some water.
"Prongs, I've got to say you have as an amazing pair of legs as Hermione." He winked at them. Hermione sniggered again, which set James off, Sirius shook his head at them continuing to sip at his water.

Hermione finished her water, setting the glass by the sink, "I'm going for a shower." She padded out, Sirius and James watched her go. When they heard the door of the bathroom close, James looked sharply at Sirius, "Why didn't you tell me about the ring Pads?" he spoke softly.
Sirius looked at his friend and shrugged, "What was there to tell, it is a little hard for us to actually have a steady relationship with what happens. But since… well since your wedding I keep thinking she is always going to be the one."

James looked at his friend closely. They had been friends since they met on the way to Hogwarts, the very first day of school. Sirius was the brother that he never had growing up, and still was that to him. They shared everything together. Sirius had been with him when he picked out the ring he was going to propose to Lily with. James had also been there for Sirius through all the pain he endured from his family, and unintentionally by Hermione's appearances. He didn't hold Hermione responsible for something she had no control. Sirius had told them much of what Hermione went through and for any two people that he wanted happiness for it was them more than anyone.

"Have you told her you love her?" he asked.
"Nearly. She was ripped away before I could say it. I wanted to last night." Sirius's gaze sharpened on his best friend.
"Your son is very good at interrupting the moment as it were."
James snorted, his son, bless him, was very demanding, "All I can say Pads, don't wait."
He chuckled and added, "You could always do it like I did, publicly so it mortified her."
Sirius laughed, "Ah, Prongs one of your most memorable moments. You made the whole school grown at the awkwardness of it all. I can't believe it worked though. Evans looked like she could kill you for the embarrassment."
James shrugged and winked at his friend, "Animal magnetism. But Padfoot in all seriousness, you can't afford to wait."

Hermione and Sirius spent the day with James, Lily and Harry. Sirius for the most part had transformed into Padfoot for Harry's entertainment. When they put Harry down for his afternoon nap, Sirius and Hermione decided it would be best to go. Hermione hugged Lily and James hard, kissing each of them on the cheek. They were a little surprised at the incredibly sad look she gave as they left, Sirius apparating them away.

Sirius apparated them to the park near his house in Coventry. It was very pretty in the afternoon light. Hermione was reserved as they walked slowly hand in hand. Her thoughts to the Potters, she feared that it was the last time that she would see Lily and James. She struggled with the fact that Harry's Parents now shared a place in her heart as much as Harry. She drew a deep breath and looked up to Sirius's face, pulling his hand so that he stepped in front of her, she stood on tip toe and pulled him into a kiss, putting all her emotions in it, he nearly staggered. He drew her in closer one hand tangling itself in her hair.

Slowly they broke away, eyes only for each other. He drew a ragged breath, "I – I love you Hermione." She stood up on tip toe again pulling him into a kiss, before their mouths met, she whispered, "I know" Her lips captured his, before he could pull away in surprise. She knew the whispering was around her as she kissed him fiercely, she held onto him so tightly, but the wind still tugged and began pulling her away, "Sirius, I love you." She whispered to him, and she was gone.

Sirius walked through the park alone. Night had fallen. He still didn't know if he was happy or sad. They said it. But she was gone too soon. The little box weighed in his pocket heavily.