Kili fought back tears as he stared at the closed door. Half of him really wanted to barge back into the room, grab Fili by the shoulders and shake him he told Kili the truth. But Kili knew he couldn't do that, it wouldn't help him, and it definitely wouldn't help Fili. The only thing he could do was the hardest; walk away and try again later.

He gave another sigh, and then slowly walked down the hallway, back down the stairs and into the kitchen. He paused when he saw his uncle sitting at the kitchen table, staring into the stove's fire.

"Uncle?" Kili asked quietly as he walked into the room.

Thorin's eyes flashed up, but he smiled when he saw Kili.

"Kili." He said, and then he motioned for Kili to come sit next to him.

Kili sat, and for a moment they were silent.

"How is he?" Thorin finally asked

Kili remained still, how was Fili? Angry, shamed, upset? What could he tell his uncle that wouldn't make him more upset at himself?

"He spoke to me, a little bit. He kept talking about things that happened before, when he was younger. He kept saying that you watched and did nothing. It didn't make much sense to me."

Thorin immediately tense, "What did he say? That he remembered? What did he remember?" He asked, his voice a thin brittle whisper.

"He wouldn't say. When I asked him he became angry and kicked me out. It was bad, Uncle. I've never seen him like this before."

Thorin's eyes were grave as he stared into the fire.

"I thought he would be too young to remember." He whispered after a few dense minutes of silence.

"Remember what?" Kili asked

"What happened to your mother."

Kili stared at his Uncle. This was the first time he had spoke of his mother, the first time in years that he had even mentioned her. Kili didn't remember his mother, she had died giving birth to him. Or at least, that's what Thorin, and Balin had told him.

"Uncle, my mother died giving birth to me." He stated, sitting down next to Thorin by the fire.

Thorin shook his head slowly, "That's what we decided to tell you. To shield you from the truth. You and Fili, but he remembers. I can't believe he remembers. This...this changes everything."

Thorin's rambling wasn't making sense.

"What happened to her?" Kili asked

Thorin remained silent, staring into the fire with dark, haunted eyes.

"Thorin. What happened to my mother?"

"My sister was taken by orcs. It was a Sunday afternoon. She and Fili had decided to walk down to the meadow. I thought nothing of it. She left you with Balin. You were only a few months old. They never came back. It took us four days to organize a search party, and another week to find them. Or what was left of them. They-." Thorin broke off with a wince and gripped his hands into fists.

Kili nodded his head, now he was starting to understand why Fili was so upset, why he was angry at Thorin. In his mind, Thorin had all but abandoned him, again.

"You know orcs, you have seen what they do to their victims. By the time we found them, by the time we found them it was too late. She was...gone. And what left of her told a story of shame and defilement. We didn't even know Fili was still alive until we heard him crying. And we thought, he's so young—only a babe-he wouldn't remember this. He wouldn't understand what had happened. We thought we were safe. We brought him home, and he seemed fine. He always seemed fine. But he wasn't. He never was...I...I have failed him as an uncle. And now, now he won't even look at me."

"I wish you had told me, Uncle." Kili said, staring at Thorin.

Thorin nodded his head, "I wish I had too. I wish I had been honest with both of you."

Kili sighed, and for a long moment there was nothing but their breathing and the crackle of the fire.

"He said something to me earlier today, he said that the orcs hurt him like they did before. And I had no idea what he was talking about but now...do you think...the orcs..." Kili broke off, it was too terribly to say, too terrible to think that those monsters would hurt a child, too awful to think that this was the second time that Fili had to go through something like this. That they had allowed him to be captured, and to be hurt again.

Thorin looked at him, and Kili had a strange sense of deja vu as he looked into his Uncle's shattered eyes. And without Thorin saying a word, Kili knew the answer.

"What can we do? He can barely look at us." He asked

"I know."

"He threw me out, last time I tried to talk to him."

"I know."

"We can't sit here and do nothing."

"I know. I know, Kili. I don't know what to do.I don't even know where to start." Thorin snapped, pulling his eyes away from the fire and standing up sharply.

"Maybe...maybe you can take him outside. Get some fresh air in the garden. The hobbit is always talking about his garden, maybe it will help. Give him something to do with his hands."

Kili nodded, he never saw Fili as much of a gardener but at least it was the start of an idea.

"Okay. I'll try."

888

Please review!