Ok people here it is… after many LOL I decided to start writing again… thanks to all the readers and reviewers. More than 9 people reviewed this time and it makes me happy. Special thanks to Shiznat for giving me ideas.

She was standing in front of the door. Her face was flushed because of the alcohol she consumed. She didn't care; she was finally there ready to tell Shizuru how much she loved her. She knocked on the door. She didn't know if Shizuru was going to come out, but she was not going to leave. She knocked again … nothing. She knocked again this time harder. This time the door opened. In front of her was standing the chestnut haired goddess. She was rubbing her eyes trying to wash away the sleep. She still hadn't opened them when she decided to speak. Her voice came out harsh and upset.

"Yes?"

"Shizuru…"

As soon as she heard the voice her eyes snapped open. She was speechless; Natsuki was standing in front of her. She didn't know what to do. She wasn't supposed to know where she was. She was still lost in thought when she smelled alcohol. She looked at Natsuki she could see her face flushed and the effort she made to stay awake and straight. Was she drunk?

"Natsuki … are you drunk?"

"Me?"

"Yes you?"

"No not at all. Why would I be drunk?"

Shizuru didn't need to know anything else. She knew that Natsuki was drunk; she slurred everything that she said right now. She knew that whatever Natsuki told her would probably make no sense. She knew that she wouldn't be able to talk to Natsuki in that state. She was surprised she had never seen Natsuki that drunk. Yes they used to go out and drink a little bit, but Natsuki too it too a whole new level. When she saw Natsuki looking at her she decided to find out why she was here.

"Natsuki, what do you want?"

Natsuki was taken aback by the harshness and coldness Shizuru had. She knew that Shizuru would be upset but she didn't think expect the cold stare she was giving her. She was trying her best not faint or laugh. She was really sleepy and her brain wasn't cooperating with her. Every time she wanted to talk she would end up slurring what she wanted to say or laughing.

"Shizuru … I …. Silence"

Shizuru could see the effort Natsuki had made right now. She was lost, what happened to Natsuki? She figured she might as well let her come in. She was already there.

"Natsuki … you should come in. It's cold outside"

Shizuru grabbed Natsuki by the arm. She knew that if she let Natsuki walk by herself, her face would meet the wooden floor in no time. They made their way inside; Shizuru sat Natsuki on the couch. Natsuki sat there and just looked at Shizuru. She was loosing focus; she needed to get to the point. The problem was that she didn't know how to approach the subject. She just couldn't tell her "Hey … what's up I was just around the neighborhood and decided to tell you that I love you." She laughed out loud earning a worried look from Shizuru.

"Natsuki are you okay?"

"Huh?? Me??? Umm yeah"

"Natsuki how did you get here? You didn't drive all the way here did you?"

"I had to. I wanted to see you."

"You could have gotten hurt."

"But I didn't and I'm here anyway"

Silence

Natsuki tried standing up but failed. She made several attempts until she made it. She was making her way towards Shizuru when she tripped over a coffee table. The sound startled them both. Shizuru looked up and saw Natsuki approaching her. She didn't know what to do. She was worried. Natsuki just drove two hours to see her. She was completely drunk and acting foolish. She saw her stop in front of her. She was staring at her, under other circumstances she would have teased her but now the only thing she could do was stare back at the green orbs.

"Shizuru…. You're beautiful"

"Natsuki…."

Natsuki cupped Shizuru's face. She was getting closer, their lips where centimeters away. Natsuki wanted to kiss Shizuru so badly she wanted to feel her lips on hers. She finally closed the distance between their lips. Her lips where so soft, she wanted more … NO … she needed more.

Shizuru couldn't believe what was happening, her dreams where becoming a reality Was this really happening or was god playing a bad joke on her? It didn't take her long to return the kiss. She had wanted this since the first day she saw her. Her lips where on top of hers, she could taste Natsuki and she was enjoying every second of it. Then she realized the taste Natsuki had. Natsuki tasted like alcohol, her mind was not reacting, she wanted to pull away and break the kiss but the feeling she had was intoxicating. After a while she finally managed to get words out of her.

"Natsuki stop…."

"Why?"

Natsuki was upset. She had come all the way to see her, to tell her how much she loved her. She had already confessed. What was wrong? Didn't Shizuru want her too? What happened did she do something wrong? Didn't she love her anymore?

"Shizuru… what?"

"Natsuki you are not thinking clearly"

"Shizuru I came all the way over here to tell you I loved you"

"Natsuki you don't love me"

"Yes I do I do love you"

Natsuki started kissing her again but this time Shizuru pushed her away.

"Natsuki stop … you're drunk. You don't know what you're saying"

"Shizuru please…"

Shizuru wanted to cry. She was so happy when Natsuki kissed her she wanted that so badly. She wanted her so badly that she forgot about the state she was in. She wanted to think that it was all real and not some bad joke. She wanted to believe she really did but she knew that Natsuki was not Natsuki. She had been drinking too much to be herself; it was the alcohol talking not her.

Shizuru knew that if Natsuki kept kissing her she would loose it. If that where to happen both of them would end up doing something that they would regret later. She didn't know what to do. She wanted to stop but she couldn't. She was loosing it and slowly giving in to her desires. She couldn't let that happen for her sake and Natsuki's. Natsuki was slowly making her way down Shizuru's neck.

"Natsuki … stop"

That was it. Natsuki wanted Shizuru and she was going to have her. She had already told her she loved her and the only thing Shizuru did was push her away. Why was this happening? Was it too late for them? Whatever the reason was, she didn't care. She was not going to take no for an answer. She was going to make Shizuru hers no matter what.

Natsuki grabbed Shizuru by the shoulders and pushed her against the wall. She let go of her shoulders and pinned her wrist above her head. She spread her legs and placed her knee between them and started kissing her.

Shizuru was scared. She never knew Natsuki was capable of treating her like this. She loved Natsuki and wanted her more than anything in the world but this … she did not want. She tried breaking free but Natsuki was stronger than her. She really didn't want to hurt Natsuki after all she was drunk. It was becoming harder to breakaway since Natsuki was kissing her neck causing her to loose focus. She was giving in. She could smell the alcohol in Natsuki. That made her snap out of her trance. She felt Natsuki loosen her grip on her wrist that gave her the opportunity to breakaway. She pushed Natsuki away. Natsuki stumbled backwards and almost fell.

She wasn't going to let Shizuru get away that easily. She shook her head and made her way towards her again. Shizuru was surprised at Natsuki's persistence but she wasn't going to let that show. She saw Natsuki coming closer so she decided to do what she thought was best. She really didn't hurt Natsuki so she was going to try to talk some sense in her.

"Natsuki please just stop this already"

Natsuki was not listening she just kept coming closer.

"Natsuki please"

Shizuru was really hopping Natsuki would listen to her and just stop. It didn't work she kept coming closer this time she grabbed Shizuru and threw her at the couch and landed on top of her.

Shizuru didn't want this. She was crying now. She was afraid of Natsuki. She didn't love this Natsuki she wanted the old one back. Natsuki started kissing her again, her hands started going down to her thighs. She started taking Shizuru's shirt off when she heard Shizuru yell.

"Natsuki just … stop… I don't want …. You…"

Natsuki stopped kissing Shizuru and just stared at her. Shizuru pushed Natsuki away and slapped her. Natsuki didn't react to the slap she was trying to regain her senses. She was lost… She saw Shizuru crying. She wanted to make her feel better but she didn't know what to do. She had hurt the one she loved the most, her precious person. She stood up and made her way towards Shizuru. Shizuru just pushed her away and sobbed even more.

Natsuki was hurt. She had come all the way to tell Shizuru how much she loved and needed her and ended up hurting her.

She was so stupid. She was lost she didn't know how to make Shizuru better when the one that made her sad was her. It hurt her seeing her like that. Natsuki decided that she was not going to run anymore. She was going to face everything life threw at her. She was tired of running. She came here to tell Shizuru she loved her and she would.

"Shizuru … I'm sorry. I didn't mean to…"

"Natsuki just… stop"

Natsuki was just staring at Shizuru asking herself questions. Was she about to rape Shizuru? Did Shizuru still love her? Would she forgive her? She wasn't sure she wanted to know the answers. She figured the best thing to do was to leave Shizuru alone. She figured she didn't want to see her after what she had almost done. So she decided that she was going to go to beach and think.

"Shizuru I'm going to … go"

Natsuki made her way out of the door, and headed towards the beach. She needed to think and just let Shizuru have her time.

Shizuru was still crying. She was terrified that Natsuki would rape her. Yes she did want her and loved her but not like that. She felt violated. She didn't know what to do. She heard Natsuki leave; she wanted to go after her but her legs wouldn't move. She was still in shock. She really didn't want Natsuki to leave in that state but she just couldn't do anything. Not after what just happened.

A few minutes passed until she stopped crying. She felt bad about everything but there wasn't anything she could do. She had to stop crying and go look for Natsuki. She knew that Natsuki didn't want to do what she had done. She really couldn't blame her but she was still shocked.

Natsuki was sitting in front of the ocean. She was trying to regain herself; she still couldn't believe what she had almost done… She just couldn't stay at the beach all night; she eventually had to go back and just face everything she had caused. She was starting to feel sleepy too. She decided that she was going to drive back home and just let things calm down.

Truth was that she had no idea what she was going to do. She didn't expect Shizuru to ever talk to her after this. She was lost. She had lost the one chance she had with Shizuru because of alcohol and her stupidity. She was mad, she wanted to make it all go away but she knew she couldn't. She just hit the sand; there was nothing she could really do now.

She was about to leave when she saw Shizuru sit beside her. She didn't know what to say, the only thing she could do was stare. Why was Shizuru sitting beside her? Why was she so kind to her when the only thing she could do was hurt her? Why? That was the only question that she wanted to know ever since Shizuru left. Why?

"Shizuru I'm really sorry for everything, I wasn't thinking clearly I didn't want to hurt you. I would never want that for you."

"Natsuki…"

"No let me talk. I know I've caused you pain and suffering. And I want you to know that it was never my intention. I was stupid to not realize how much I really loved you, and it's ok if you never forgive me I just wanted you to know that what I said inside was the truth. You are beautiful and I truly love you. It's not the alcohol that is talking it's me. The Natsuki you used to love"

"Natsuki I … don't know what to say…"

"You don't have to say anything. I just wanted you to know what I though. I should be leaving now. I am truly sorry for everything I put you through"

Natsuki stood up and was about to leave when she felt Shizuru grab her arm.

"Natsuki wait."

"Shizuru…"

"My turn to talk Natsuki… I'm sorry if I didn't believe you. I truly am but I want you to know that I still love you and I always will no matter what happens."

Natsuki wanted to kiss Shizuru so badly that moment. She wanted to taste those lips again. She wanted her, but she knew that if she did it would make Shizuru uncomfortable so she calmed herself. Both of them where looking intently at each other. Natsuki just wanted to know one last thing before she left. She probably knew the answer but just wanted to try either way.

"Shizuru … may I … Kiss you?"

Shizuru smiled. She was just thinking the same thing.

"It's ok if you don't want to….I….totally understand… If"

Natsuki was silenced when she felt Shizuru's lips on top of hers.

TBC???

U think I should continue?? Or is that a good ending? Whatever you guys say I'll do… so it's been a long day and a lot of things happened so I better go to sleep now… Please review… I want as many reviews as possible … and thanks to those who reviewed last chapter. Hope you can do it again. This chapter is shorter than the last one but... I have my reasons... Hope u guys like AND PLEASE REVIEW.