It's a Wonderful Cover Life

A/N 2013: Hi folks, so this is going a little slower than anticipated, but sitting without electricity for two days really turns life upside down. I don't know how the people in the Dark Ages did it. Thanks Nervert for going over this again. In case you guys missed it, he updated Revenge of the Bartowski on Friday, and oh boy, I don't know about you, but I worry about what goes on in his mind sometimes *wink*. Anyway, we have some catching up to do, but not tonight, because Survivor Finale (enough said).

A/N: At this point I should probably apologize to Borrowed Hearts – this story isn't following the plot as much as just using the general idea, but I'm having fun and judging by the reviews, so are some of you. Over 250 reviews already, wow! Thanks so much, I always love hearing from you guys. Also thank you to Nervert, my partner in crime. He suffers through the annoying editing glitches so you don't have to.

I don't own Chuck or Borrowed Hearts.

48. The Bartowski Inquisition

Chuck felt footloose and fancy-free. At least he thought he did – he had no idea exactly what fancy-free entailed. He did feel like doing a little happy dance, but not only didn't he dance as a rule, he was pretty sure that if he broke out a couple of spastic robot moves, the orderlies would unceremoniously escort him upstairs to the psych ward.

"There's that AWOL brother of mine."

"Hey, Sis."

Chuck grinned as Ellie rounded the nurse's station and enveloped him in a bear hug. He'd missed that. She pulled back and punched him in the shoulder. Hard. He had not missed that. "Ow, El. What did I do?"

"You took my niece and disappeared on me."

"It's only been three days," he replied, rubbing the spot that had just suffered some sisterly abuse.

Ellie leaned bank against the desk and folded her arms across her chest. "Which means you should be coming home tonight." She didn't exactly phrase it as a question.

Chuck cringed. "I was going to call, but then I got – " Kissed, his brain supplied. " – side tracked," he said.

"It must have been a pretty big distraction. I haven't heard a word from you since you left. Why haven't you returned any of my calls? Or just picked up a phone to say 'hey, we're still alive'? Do you know how worried I've been? If it hadn't been for Devon I would've driven up to Malibu to see for myself that you hadn't been kidnapped or locked up in a bunker, but apparently it 'wouldn't be awesome' to mess up my brother's big payday." Ellie dropped her voice and added air quotes as she mimicked her fiancé. "Seriously, Chuck. Why didn't you call?"

Chuck cocked his head to the side and studied his sister. Aside from his time at Stanford, they'd lived together their whole lives and he could tell that there was more to her outburst than him not getting in touch. "What's really bothering you, El?" he asked.

"What, you disappearing on me for three days isn't enough?"

"Okay, yeah, it is, but I can tell there's something else."

Ellie took a deep breath and released it slowly. "I went downstairs to see Maggie on my break."

"Is she okay?"

"She's uninjured," Ellie said, but his eyes widened a little nonetheless.

"I know you're a doctor, El, but saying she's fine is a lot more reassuring. She is fine, right?"

"He's asking me," she mumbled under her breath.

"Ellie, did something happen?" His mind started conjuring up everything that could happen to a little girl at daycare. Though his logic told him that his sister wouldn't be so calm if something serious had, panic still rushed through his limbs.

"Kitty happened. Maggie couldn't stop talking about her. Kitty gives her ice-cream when she can't sleep. Kitty makes mac 'n cheese without broccoli. She and Kitty dress the same, do their hair the same – "

Chuck let out a relieved breath. "You should see them together, Sis," he said before his brain could filter the words. "Sarah was apprehensive at first, but she's a natural. She even managed to break the Dora combination."

"Yeah," Ellie deadpanned, "Sarah sounds neat, but you haven't answered my question. When are you coming home?"

He slipped his hands deep into his pockets and shifted his weight from one foot to the other.

"Chuck?"

His palms started to sweat a little. It was never a good sign when Ellie pronounced his name like it had two syllables.

"December twenty sixth," he answered quickly, hoping that by some miracle Ellie didn't actually hear him, though judging by her expression, her ears were in fine working condition.

"Please tell me you're joking. And by the way, that is not funny."

"Well," he said, "things got a little complicated." Which appeared to be his new word of the day, Chuck thought. "We need to stay longer." Ellie opened her mouth to reply, but Chuck decided to pre-empt her. "Don't worry about Christmas. I've talked to Sarah and we can still do our Bartowski thing, we'll just be doing it at her house instead of the apartment. She has this amazing cook, Lou, who will help with all the food preparation, and there's Casey, and Gertrude who does the cleaning up so you can take a breather this year – " Ellie's eyes narrowed. "Or not," he added.

"You're staying for at least another week?"

"Yeah, it can't be helped. Sarah's business associate had a change of plans. Her son went skiing with his girlfriend and they had this disagreement – "

"Chuck," Ellie cut him off, "I don't care about any of that. What I do care about is that this was not part of the deal."

"I know," he replied and then dropped his voice. "She's giving me an additional eighty, though. That's one hundred thousand dollars."

To his surprise Ellie didn't even blink at the number. "Is that what your daughter is worth to you?"

Chuck's good mood evaporated. "You're not being fair, Ellie. You were the one who convinced me to do this in the first place. Just because things didn't work out the way it was planned doesn't give you the right to insinuate that I'm a bad father."

"That's not what I meant." Ellie held up her palms defensively. "I don't think that. I'm just worried about Maggie. If I had known that it was going to turn out this way – " She trailed off and ran a hand over her face. She looked exhausted and Chuck assumed she'd put in another double shift, so he decided to cut her some slack.

"It's not your fault, El. But it's not mine or Sarah's either. She realizes the implications and she's really trying to make this easier on everyone."

"Okay," Ellie said. "I would feel better if I had actually met Sarah, but I'll take your word for it."

"Thank you." Chuck didn't doubt her sincerity even though he could spot the 'but' from a mile away and, as always, she didn't keep him waiting.

"Maybe Maggie should stay with me and Devon tonight. A break from Sarah would do her good."

Chuck wasn't taken with the idea at all. Ellie had a point, but Maggie had never had a sleepover without him before. He knew his concern was crazy, technically Maggie would be home with her aunt and uncle and he'd be the one out for the night, but still, it meant separation. At the end of the day, though, he had to suck it up and do what was best for his daughter.

"Okay," he agreed, albeit reluctantly.

49. Oh Puppy Tails

Sarah leaned back against her office chair, her eyes immediately drawn to the picture frames on the left hand corner of the desk. One was a fake – a photo-shopped wedding picture of her and Chuck. It looked realistic enough, though if she looked closely, something didn't seem quite right, but she couldn't quite put her finger on it. Next to it stood a double frame, showing Maggie as a baby on one side and a more recent image of the four-year-old wearing a tutu and grinning widely on the other. Chuck had lent them to her, amongst the others that were displayed around her house. She wouldn't admit it out loud, but his idea of interior decorating was slowly starting to grow on her. The mansion felt more welcoming.

Thoughts of home suddenly spurred her into action. She closed the document on her screen — having reread the last paragraph of the sales agreement three times she'd decided she wasn't going to make any progress anyway — and shut down her laptop. She slipped it into its carrycase and reached into her purse for her car keys. Her fingers brushed against something unfamiliar and she pulled it out. Unfolding the picture, she smiled involuntarily. A much younger, goofier looking nerd was grinning back at her. His hair was longer, the curls making funny animal shapes. She thought it was cute.

Sarah was pulled from her reverie when her phone rang. Chuck's face filled the screen. She quickly folded the picture again and put it in her top desk drawer before pressing the answer button.

"Hi, Chuck. What's up?"

"Hi. I was just wondering if you'd be home anytime soon."

Sarah frowned at the anxious tone in his voice. "I'm actually on my way," she replied. "Did something happen?"

"Hang on," he told her. There was silence on the other end of the line, followed by the sound of a door closing. Chuck continued in a whisper. "You're late. Carina and Beckman are here and things were going well, but then this strange man showed up and he kept…he's giving me these really threatening looks. Well, not exactly threatening, more like…I don't know, like he's onto me…us. We're not committing a federal offence, are we? He looks like an FBI type. Sarah, I can't go to jail. Maggie needs her dad and I – "

"Chuck," she cut in. "Breathe." Once satisfied that he'd done as she'd instructed she glanced at her watch. "Oh shit," she cursed under her breath. She had no idea how time had gotten away from her.

"Oh puppy tails."

"What?" Sarah asked, confused by Chuck's response.

"If you curse around a child, you need to use innocent words," he replied. "It helps if you practice when they're not around."

"Oh." She pinched the phone between her ear and shoulder and grabbed her purse and laptop. "I'll remember that." Then she checked her watch again. "I'll be home in fifteen minutes. Just stay calm, go back out there and let Carina do most of the talking." She was about to end the call when she remembered something. "And Chuck, the FBI Agent is actually my uncle, Roan Montgomery. Don't worry about him. He knows."

"So he is with the FBI."

"He's not with the FBI, Chuck." Another acronym agency maybe, she thought, but didn't voice it.

"And the looks are just my overactive imagination?"

"Probably," Sarah lied. Uncle Roan could be a tad overprotective, but there was no need to point that out to Chuck now. He'd only freak out more.

"Okay, good. One more thing," he added before she could disconnect the call, "Maggie's not here."

That piece of information made Sarah stop in her tracks. "What do you mean Maggie's not there? Where is she? Did you forget her somewhere?"

"That happened once," Chuck replied, "and it wasn't entirely my fault. Granted, if she hadn't followed one of Santa's elves thinking he was Morgan…you know what, not important. She's spending the night at Ellie and Awesome's. I'll explain later, but I just wanted to give you a heads up. For the cover."

"You should've asked me first," she said. "I've hardly seen her all day and – " Realizing what she was saying, Sarah stopped herself. "What did you tell Beckman?" she asked instead.

"She hasn't mentioned it. She seems a little preoccupied with your uncle."

"That was the plan." Sarah glanced at Maggie's pictures one last time before crossing the room and switching off the lights.

"You are a genius," Chuck replied.

Sarah smiled to herself. "I have my moments."

50. Flirting With Disaster

Chuck excused himself to go check on dinner, though he doubted his absence would've been noticed. Sarah's plan was panning out as Uncle Roan was charming Beckman off her feet. Chuck was somewhat in awe of the man for making it look so easy. He never really had much luck with women himself, even back when he was trying. He and Jill had become friends after Bryce had introduced them, and their relationship had steadily grown, but when he'd asked Jill out on a date for the first time, he'd been a bundle of nerves. So much so that he'd temporarily forgotten his fear of heights and had pulled a moronic move.

"Hey, Lou," he greeted the cook when he stepped into the kitchen, forcing his memories of the past back to where they belonged – in the past.

The vast height difference between him and the petite brunette caused her to tilt her head back when she looked at him.

"Hey, Chuck. What are you doing back here? Fleeing the scene of the crime?"

"Something like that," he replied.

Lou sniffed, rubbing her eyes with the back of her hand and then blinked a few times. Chuck gestured to the chopping board.

"I can help if you want. The trick to chopping onions is to bite on a toothpick. That way your eyes don't tear up."

"Does that really work?" Lou asked as she handed over the knife.

"Not at all, actually." He grinned and she gave him a playful shove before turning towards the oven to take out the roast chicken while Chuck concentrated on not chopping his fingers off.

"You know," Lou said, waving the steam from the meat, "women like a man who can cook." She winked at Chuck and then reached past him for the bowl of sundried tomatoes.

He let out a nervous laugh. "That's too bad. My talents don't go further than pancakes and chicken pepperoni, unless you count ordering takeout?"

Lou shook her head and scooped up a handful of onions. "That's cheating." She sprinkled a last couple of ingredients over the chicken and popped it back into the oven. "You could always take some lessons," she said.

He supposed he should, Chuck thought. If he and Maggie were going to move out on their own, they probably wouldn't be able to survive on cereal and pizza alone. Well, they'd survive, but the lack of nutrition might stunt Maggie's growth.

"Are you offering?" he asked.

Lou opened her mouth to reply, but was cut off by the loud clearing of a throat. Two pairs of eyes turned towards the kitchen door and Chuck swallowed audibly when he saw Sarah's expression.

She did not look happy.

51. Road Rage

Sarah abruptly turned and made her way towards the living room. She heard Chuck following, but didn't slow down. Schooling her features, she rounded the last corner, though not fast enough.

"Sarah, hey, hey, hey." He grabbed her arm, spinning her around. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," she replied, trying, and failing, to force a smile.

"That's definitely a something-nothing." He ducked his head to keep her gaze. "Is this about Maggie?" he asked.

Sarah shook her head. How would she even begin to explain this to him? She was paying him to pretend to be her husband. She should not be getting jealous…she wasn't jealous, she corrected herself, she was angry. He was flirting with the cook for all to see. Beckman could have walked in and everything could've been wrecked. And how cliché was that – the husband and the help?

"Okay," Chuck said slowly, drawing out the syllables. "Are you going to tell me what's bothering you or do I need to keep guessing?"

"Traffic," she replied, keeping her voice low. This was not the time or place to confront him. "It always puts me in a bad mood. I'll be fine in a minute."

Chuck raised a disbelieving eyebrow. "But you made it home in record time. How much traffic could there have been?"

Sarah huffed, mentally kicking herself for the lame excuse. "Chuck, you're not helping."

"Okay," he said again, "sorry." He checked his watch and then leaned back against the wall, folding his arms and staring at the ceiling.

"What are you doing?"

"Giving you a minute."

His sincerity about something so ridiculous caused her animosity to flare up again. On the surface he really seemed genuine and nice, but deep down all men were the same. He'd set up a really nice lunch earlier and now she'd come home to find him… She wasn't jealous, Sarah reminded herself. And fortune cookies were a stupid gimmick, just words on a strip of paper. She squeezed her eyes shut and ran a hand through her hair. Then she took a deep breath, and only when the knot in her chest felt less tight did she open her eyes.

"Better?" Chuck asked.

She gave him a silent nod and gestured over her shoulder. "We should get in there."

Chuck straightened and offered his hand, but she pretended not to notice. Instead she turned on her heel and led the way, wondering how difficult it would be to find another cook.

52. Choking on a Pearl

Chuck stole a glance at Sarah, but it was her uncle who caught his gaze. Roan narrowed his eyes causing Chuck to cast his own back down to his plate just as Sarah looked up. They'd played that version of eye-tag at least four times in the past twenty minutes.

Despite Sarah's reassurance, Chuck got the distinct feeling that her uncle didn't trust him. He could relate. If Maggie were to ever invite a complete stranger into her home for whatever reason … the thought was too disturbing to even consider. What he did not understand was Sarah's sudden mood change. They'd had a great time at lunch, and she'd seemed fine when he'd spoken to her over the phone, but she'd practically ignored him since their exchange in the hallway. He didn't buy her excuse for a minute. His gut told him he'd screwed up for the second time, though he'd been racking his brain to figure out what he'd done. All he came up with was the fact that he'd let Maggie stay over at Ellie's. Sarah's reaction to the news had been surprising, but she'd assured him that was not it and she had no reason to lie about that.

Casey and Lou served dessert, giving Chuck the opportunity to try and catch Sarah's attention again. He failed for the umpteenth time, but did catch something unexpected. Sarah gave Lou a look that could refreeze the polar caps melted by global warming, except that it was gone so quickly he doubted what he'd seen. Puzzled, he took a bite of his chocolate mousse cake. It literally melted on his tongue. The dinner had been fantastic too, so he saw no reason why Sarah would be angry at Lou. Maybe she served something Sarah didn't like, but he was sure Lou would know better, given how long she'd been on the Walker staff. He shook his head, thinking that maybe he'd imagined the whole thing.

"Don't you like the cake, Chuck?" Beckman asked.

Startled he almost dropped his fork, but managed to hold onto it after some juggling. "No." He shook his head again and then changed it into a nodding gesture. "Yes." Beckman was still looking at him expectantly, apparently waiting for him to elaborate. "I was just thinking that Maggie would enjoy this." He sent a silent apology to the universe for shamelessly dragging his daughter into his lie. "It's her favorite."

Beckman gave him a sympathetic smile. "I'm sure her aunt and uncle-to-be are spoiling her rotten as we speak. Does she see them often?"

"We let her stay over once a week," Chuck lied again, pushing down the wave of separation anxiety that had been hovering just below the surface all evening. "Ellie and Maggie are very close."

"It sounds like you are a very close-knit family," Beckman replied, then turned to Roan and winked. "Those of you who don't gallivant around the globe for a living."

"The world is my oyster," the older man said, lifting his martini glass in salute. He'd opted for a liquid dessert and Chuck was starting to think that fermented potatoes and olives were his staple diet. "But it seems that I found a pearl right here at home," Roan continued, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

Beckman blushed and smiled at him, but the smile faltered almost immediately as she turned quickly to Sarah. "Oh my gosh, I wasn't thinking. I am so sorry."

"Why?" Sarah asked, a little bewildered. "I'm really glad you hit it off."

"Oh, I'm not apologizing for that." Beckman sent Roan a sly glance. "I'm ruining your date night. That's why Maggie's at her aunt's, isn't it? She babysits so you and Chuck can spend some time alone together."

It was Sarah's turn to blush and Chuck cleared his throat to distract Beckman. "It's no big deal," he replied before Sarah could. "We can skip a week."

"Absolutely not," Beckman said. "I don't want to put you out any more than necessary." Chuck wanted to contradict her, but didn't get the chance. "If you don't mind rescheduling for tomorrow night, Roan and I will gladly watch Maggie." She addressed Roan again. "I'm sure you'd want to get reacquainted with your great-niece after being gone for so long."

"That's really not necessary," Sarah jumped in. "Chuck and I will do something extra special next week to make up for tonight."

Beckman waved her off. "Nonsense. Besides, I look forward to getting to know your uncle and daughter better."

Both Sarah and Chuck turned to Roan for help, but he was busy trying to extricate a swallow of vodka from his lungs. All he could manage was a less than enthusiastic smile and a nod. Beckman gave the 'married couple' a satisfied smirk. "It's settled then."

A/N: Well, you've asked for jealous Sarah, but honestly, I've planned her all along. Up next: Revenge is a dish best served without tequila. Or should that be with? Stay tuned to find out.