A/N: Done with fall quarter. -kicks college away-

Chapter 10

"Why are you so reluctant to see Mikan?"

"Why are you so pushy about seeing Mikan?" he shot back with a scowl and yanked his shoulder from Hotaru's grasp. He heard the girl sigh tiredly as he looked away.

"Why can't I be pushy about seeing Mikan?" she finally asked.

"That's easy." He faced her. "First, we all haven't known Mikan long enough. Second, she's an online friend who games occasionally. So how are we going to trust her?"

"At least she didn't lie. And realize that you came here on your own will, you hypocrit. I gave you a chance to back out. You came. And now you're complaining."

Natsume glared at her but couldn't say anything back. The guilt he had temporarily forgotten came back like a dead weight. And he did come because of that. He plopped onto a seat and pulled his suitcase in between Hotaru and him. "I'm not wrong for being wary," he said.

"You say that, but that isn't your reason. It's your self-consciousness that got in the way and ruined it."

He scoffed. "Yeah, everything's my fault."

"Maybe. And I'm not even being sarcastic." Hotaru tossed her hair back and clicked her tongue. "If you decide to stop being a brat, you can come to McDonalds with me to get a drink. Otherwise, go think about whatever you did 'right', and think that it may be 'wrong'." She pulled up her suitcase handle and stiffly walked away.

He growled and crossed his arms in contempt.

"Anna," Mikan cried into the phone. "Help...come back from Italy, please..."

"Uh...I don't know what to say..." a feminine voice replied back. "I can't come back because I'm doing some internship. But how do you know that they'll find you?"

"One of them messaged me my address...HOW FREAKING SCARY IS THAT?!" she suddenly shouted.

"That's what you get for talking to strangers."

"Maybe," Mikan hiccuped and stuffed more chips into her mouth.

"Are those chips I hear? Mikan, don't make yourself a fatty over the summer. Eat something healthy."

"It's lettuce," the brunette murmured, digging into the bag.

Anna sighed loudly. "You numb bucket, I can hear the difference between chips and lettuce. Now put that away or else I'll hang up on you."

"DON'T HANG UP!" she cried. "I MIGHT GET KIDNAPPED ANY SECOND. AND YOU NEED TO BE A HEARING WITNESS!"

"Dear lord...aren't you being a bit paranoid though?"

"THEY. HAVE. MY. ADDRESS. ANNA," Mikan exclaimed. "I'm scared that any second, they'll bust down the door with rifle guns and say something like 'Where the flippity shick shack is a girl named Mikan?'! One of them even knows what I look like, while another probably stalked my facebook, so I'm screwed if I try to sacrifice someone in my place."

"Look girl. Besides the whole talking-to-strangers part, aren't you good friends with them?"

"...G-good friends?" she blinked.

"You've been playing a game with them for some weeks. Then, because of one little incident, you decide to go bananas and hold a grudge against all of them, even though it was only one of them being an asshole. After that, you don't go on for several weeks. You ignore all their attempts to message you. Now they want to come visit you and even give you a little message before they do. So what do you say? I think they just miss you," Anna explained.

"...Miss me?"

"I mean, if I were to hang up on you right now and ignore you for several weeks, wouldn't you miss me?"

"Yeah."

"Good. If I heard any other answer, I would've slammed this phone back on its receiver."

Mikan laughed and wiped a tear from her eye. It was a good idea to call Anna.

He scrolled through Skype, ignoring messages of other players who requested a trade in-game. He kept swiping upwards as the screen scurried to the bottom. There were a few people he never contacted. Some were people he knew in real life, like Ruka. The others were players who probably quit the game or stopped using Skype.

The screen finally stopped, and an icy sweat covered his neck.

Group chat - 2012

Who the fuck do you think you are? was the last message that was in the chat's history.

He quickly scrolled back to the top, seeing familiar names pop up. His finger finally pressed down and paused the screen.

MikiOrange**

The last message exchanged between them was his own from a couple of days ago. Mikan unsurprisingly never replied to it. And she probably never would. He looked once more at the Skype name and clicked on it, revealing their chat messages.

Natsume read them over and over again. It wasn't long, but he wanted something to distract his mind. A few messages he cringed at himself, wondering what had overcome his stoic mind. Giving her a ring...and asking her not to tell others. He lowered his cap and covered his face. Embarrassing.

But he didn't hate it.

He reread the messages again. It must've been the seventh time.

And that stuck it in him.

He was the one who asked Mikan to video-chat.

And he broke the promise. Out of selfishness. His self-consciousness that had nagged him last minute. Hotaru was right.

His cheeks and forehead warmed at realizing the extent of his bad decision. Mikan had trusted him to uncover her own face in front of Ruka. And somehow, she knew it wasn't him. Natsume couldn't imagine how betrayed she had felt.

He swiped the screen to the bottom of the chat where he saw his last message sent.

Natsume: Are you reading this, Mikan?

It wasn't even an apology. He silently laughed to himself. It was a cowardly message. He pressed the chatbox and began pressing the letters, forming the words he felt were necessary to say.

Then he saw the symbol next to her name change from grey to green.

Mikan is online.

His fingers froze. And without realizing it, he deleted the words and turned off his phone and broke in cold sweat.

Mikan logged onto Skype, hearing the familiar ring and bloop that opened the screen. She had just realized she had never read Natsume's message.

Humming a bit, she clicked on history and pressed on Natsume's name that had (1) notification besides it.

She read it.

Natsume: Are you reading this, Mikan?

The brunette looked at it quizzically as her fingers rested on her keyboard. They were itching to type something. She double clicked the text box and typed. With a final look, she hesitantly pushed enter.

Mikan: Yes, I am.

Bloop!

Natsume blinked. A Skype notification? He pressed the power button.

His eyes widened at the simple message sent by her. The boy quickly swiped her message across and unlocked the screen, greedily reading her message over and over again. It was sent only a minute ago. Without waiting, he typed.

Natsume: Mikan

Natsume: I'm sorry.

His arms were stiff as he reread his own message. Was it too little? Was it too straightforward? He anxiously waited and drummed his fingers on the arm of a chair.

There was no reply for several minutes.

He almost wanted to remove or edit his message before he saw Mikan is typing . . .

Mikan: I know.

Natsume stared at the screen. She had replied to his apology. He was about to say more before he saw Mikan is typing . . . again.

Mikan: I'm sorry too.

Natsume: What

Natsume: Why?

Natsume: I was in the wrong

Mikan: I ignored all of you guys for several weeks.

Mikan: I think that was a bit immature of me.

Natsume: You didn't do anything wrong, noob.

He froze from typing "noob" without thinking.

Mikan: Really?

The dark-haired male sighed in relief at her unaffected response.

Natsume: Really.

Mikan: Then...you're really sorry?

Natsume: Yes

Mikan: Then

Mikan: Can you do one thing for me?

Mikan: Actually

Mikan: Two things.

Natsume: What is it?

Mikan: First, answer this.

Mikan: You are Natsume right now, right?

Natsume: Yes

Mikan: You're being weirdly nice right now

Natsume: I can be mean if you want me to.

Mikan: lol

Mikan: I guess you are Natsume

Natsume: What's the second thing, noob?

Mikan: Stop calling me noob.

Natsume: Sorry.

Mikan: I meant that in a joking way C:

Mikan: Anyways

Mikan: The second thing. . .

Natsume: What is it?

Mikan: Actually, can I have three things?

Natsume: ...

Natsume: Make up your mind.

Mikan: Just three things. No more.

Natsume: Okay.

Mikan: Alright

Mikan: Answer this.

Mikan: Why didn't you video-chat me?

Natsume: I

He stared at the phone.

Then he inhaled deeply. And exhaled.

Natsume: I

She waited. The message at the bottom saying Natsume is typing . . . disappeared, and she frowned. Mikan rolled onto her back and sighed into the dusty air of her bedroom. She peered back at her laptop. Nothing.

She looked again.

Nothing.

She closed her eyes for around five minutes before she heard two bloop's from the laptop, and she propelled herself to the laptop screen.

Natsume: I'm

Natsume: self-conscious about my face.

Her cheeks puffed out, red and bloated, before she began chortling. She read it over and over again. Self-conscious? The mighty number one player of Gakuen Alice?

She laughed, feeling some pressure taken off of her, before her Skype rang in notifications again.

Natsume: I have scars

Natsume: from

Natsume: my

Natsume: from my real parents.

Natsume: I have burns

Natsume: from school.

A sudden feeling of dread overwhelmed him. He felt like he should've typed more. His fingers pressed the text box. He needed to change the subject. Something happier.

Natsume: Anyways

Natsume: I don't know why I

Natsume: suddenly wanted to video-chat you.

Natsume: It was like I forgot all the shit.

Natsume: I'm sorry

Natsume: for making a broken promise

Natsume: Mikan.

He finished.

It wasn't happy.

He was scared.

His quivering hands held down the power button, and he swiped to turn off the phone.

A shaky breath was let out as he pressed his lips against the cold screen.