AN: All apologies for the long delay in getting this out; the second half of my Japan trip ended up being very busy. Which is technically a good thing, but exhausting. And jetlag is a pain.

This is, technically, the end of the story. However, there will be one more update, because I ended up writing a coda for the story...

What the Cat Dragged In

Chapter Six

The message Natasha sent was characteristically short, terse, to the point, and – considering the way their last communication had ended – entirely unsatisfying in terms of details.

Still, Black Widow managed to cover the most salient points: Peacemonger situation handled. No casualties. No lasting damage. Leaving Paris. Full report upon return.

Fury grimaced, leaning back in his chair and pinching the bridge of his nose. Not that it did damn-all as a stress reduction technique. Days like this, he desperately missed his own days as a field agent. Blowing up a deserving target definitely sounded appealing right now, and he so rarely got to push the button himself, as Director.

It didn't help that, all things considered, this had to be the best possible outcome of what had been his worst-case scenario when he'd sent Black Widow and Hawkeye to Paris – particularly after learning that Ironman would be there as well.

Given the limited information they'd had on the situation going in – and damn Bourgeois for the suppression or outright ignorance of any real information on the threat – that had seemed a somewhat delicate but still manageable set of circumstances. With the added information that the Avengers had gathered from their discussion with the civilians (and Fury fully intended certain heads to roll over the fact that his primary data analysts had dismissed this Ladyblog as a source of information, run by a teenage fangirl or no), precarious had quickly been revised to disaster waiting to happen.

And likely to happen to anyone else we send in. Damn it.

There was so much SHIELD could have done to, if not handle the situation, at least mitigate it for the people on the ground – hero and civilian alike. Pattern analysis to track this Papillon down, find him, and end him. On-the-ground support moving civilians out of the way of combat, or even to help harry the supervillains. Drop points for supplies, such as whatever Ladybug and Chat Noir needed to recharge their abilities, so that they weren't forced to scrounge for them if a fight went long, hoping to get lucky.

Hell. A basic stipend, to offset the all-too-likely financial difficulties the two heroes were undoubtedly facing, as the Avengers had noted. Even that would be more support than what the pair were getting at the moment.

Except that even the intelligence support required some form of secure communications. Which, given that Ladybug and Chat Noir didn't exactly publicize their contact information, meant that communications would have to go through unsecured channels… or arranging a face-to-face hand-off of some kind.

And every agent we send into Paris is as much at risk for possession as the locals. More so, probably, for the same reasons he was pulling the Avengers out. No SHIELD agent joined the organization because they enjoyed the feeling of being helpless.

Any sort of support in the form of supplies was even more at risk. Bank accounts could be traced. And even if the agents making the drops managed to escape being compromised…

All it would take is someone identifying the drop areas, and Papillon will have a ready-made ambush location.

Or the press would. Professional or amateur. And that was arguably even more dangerous. Ladybug and Chat Noir were free to fight back against Papillon.

Fury grimaced. Black Widow was right, damn it all. Right now, the best thing they could do for the people of Paris was to stay out of it. And keep an eagle eye out in case the situation ever changed.

He snorted to himself, then. At least I should have enough material now to convince the World Security Council to keep their hands to themselves. All things considered, what they knew of Ladybug and Chat Noir's powers said they'd be too limited to be of great help in most circumstances. Which might not stop them – Ladybug's ability to restore damage would have been invaluable after the Chitauri invasion, for example, if she could actually apply it in such a case, and Chat Noir's ability to destroy with a touch opened fascinating options…

As if they thought that far ahead. No – he was fairly certain the pressure from the WSC to recruit the pair had more to do with collective annoyance that the French members would not stop bragging about having their own home-grown superheroes.

Politics. Hmph.

Well, he thought, pushing his chair back as he stood. At least one good thing seems to have come of the Peacemonger mess. I'm not sure even Black Widow would have been able to convince Stark to cut losses and leave, otherwise.

"You seriously don't remember anything?" Clint asked, his eyebrows doing something complicated as he looked over at Tony – a gesture that involved dodging a small family with enough luggage on a pushcart to keep an entire battalion of high-society ladies well-stocked, and all the steering capabilities of the Hulk at full charge.

Seriously, there were reasons Tony avoided commercial airlines, some of which had nothing to do with the vulnerability of being stuck in a metal tube with a whole bunch of strangers or the irresistible urge to tinker with the plane just a little while in flight. But even private jets needed someplace to land, so the Charles de Gaulle Airport was something of a necessary evil.

"Not a thing," Tony confirmed, making for the peace and elbow room of the VIP area. "Just going up to the roof to sulk." He grimaced. "Which was damn stupid of me, in hindsight."

Natasha shook her head, walking with an air of directed purpose that even had the luggage train juggernauts finding reasons to not be in her way. Tony really wanted to learn that trick, but he had the feeling that he just didn't have the right personality to pull it off. Or maybe the right combination of chromosomes. "No one is particularly intelligent when they're furious," she said. "And you had your reasons."

That had actually been the most disorienting part of the whole thing. He'd stormed up to the roof with a mad-on fit to jury-rig a new suit and blast holes in the landscape. Then the next thing he knew, he was lying flat on his back in the grass as the arc reactor clicked into place, a ruffled Natasha and relieved-looking Ladybug standing over him, and he just… wasn't angry, anymore. Not that he'd forgotten why he'd been angry, not at all. But it was like something had gone in and just opened a valve and all the anger and frustration that had welled up to pool in his gut had just… drained away.

As a therapy technique, it actually wasn't half-bad – except for all the chaos and destruction everyone else had to deal with, of course. With the anger gone, he'd been clear-headed enough to actually listen to Natasha's explanation of the situation, after Ladybug and Chat Noir had done their usual whoops timer's going gotta run thing.

The explanation had summed up to, believe it or not, we actually came to see if we could do anything to help.

"Ladybug and Chat Noir are defending a major capital city," Natasha had told him bluntly. "The last thing SHIELD wants to do is haul the local experts out of an ongoing situation. Our goal was to offer them some form of back-up or support if possible."

Of course, Tony's little stint as Peacemonger – Peacemonger, if he ever got his hands on Papillon there would be words, because the Obadiah Stane reference was not cool – had put paid to that idea. It was enough to throw Tony into high dudgeon all over again.

Which was why he'd given in and gotten them all a ticket out of France. Tony hadn't survived this long by lying to himself about the sort of person he was, and he didn't mean to start now. There was no way he wasn't going to get into a proper sulk over this mess again – and if he was in Paris, well, Peacemonger would doubtless be quick to make a reappearance.

No wonder the city had invested in a specialist counselor for akuma victims. Sure, the whole get-possessed-and-fixed thing apparently cleared out the mind-fogging rrrrrrrrrrrrrargh!-style fury that Papillon latched onto, but the causes of that fury wouldn't have changed. In some cases, just getting past that initial rage was enough to settle the problem. In others – well, without doing anything, it would just boil up all over again.

Besides. The looks on Natasha and Clint's faces when he'd actually agreed to talk to the counselor briefly had been epic and well worth the poking. Especially since the counselor turned out to be a brisk, no-nonsense lady who apparently had already figured out that pussy-footing around Tony's feelings wasn't the right way to handle him. Tony had actually asked for her card, after she'd released him from the brief session to go back to his hotel and, word-for-word, fall over so hard you leave a crater in the floor. Not that he ever anticipated using it himself, but believe it or not Tony did recognize that sometimes people needed that sort of thing, and he liked to have a list of competent experts on hand.

Not to mention his ulterior motive in that little visit. After all, one thing that had become painfully clear was that the real experts on the Papillon situation weren't the authorities of Paris.

As evidenced by the small group waiting for them in the VIP lounge.

Tony blinked at the teenagers. "Okay, I'll bite. How'd you know to meet us here?"

Alya grinned broadly, one eye closing in a wink as she wagged her finger. "A good journalist doesn't reveal her sources!"

Nino snickered, crossing his arms over his chest. "By which she means that Chloé finally figured out that the Black Widow was in town and was screaming to the high heavens about the injustice of you leaving so soon. Good call on getting while the getting's good, I say."

Natasha actually closed her eyes and covered her face with a hand for a second, while Clint looked pained, and wow, Tony couldn't blame them. Talk about a security fail. He had a feeling that Mayor Bourgeois was going to be blacklisted from anything even resembling sensitive information for the rest of the man's career. "And meeting us here?" she asked dryly.

"Ah. That would be my doing," Adrien admitted, flushing slightly. "My father doesn't… well, travel much anymore, but I've been brought along to greet important visitors enough to know my way around the VIP areas."

"Okay, that makes sense. Except for why," Clint said pointedly.

"We wanted to make sure you were all okay," Marinette explained, clasping her hands behind her back, the little round pink purse slung over her shoulder swinging slightly with the movement.

And apparently you meant Tony, given the way Natasha and Clint both cast pointed looks at him. Feeling awkward in a way that never happened when there were cameras pointed at him or he got caught doing something incriminating by Pepper, Tony coughed into his hand. "Eh… I'll manage," he said.

"What about you?" Natasha asked, looking at them. "I apologize for leading the battle so close to your school, but it was the only area we could think of where there wouldn't be many people or cars around." She hesitated. "Do you know Rose or Juleka, by any chance?"

Tony bit down a wince. Natasha had told him that bit. Or rather, she and Clint had referenced it, and Tony hadn't let it go until he had every ugly little detail.

In a way, the story of carting the two kids away to keep them out of the line of fire scared Tony the most out of all of Peacemonger's actions. Because he could actually see himself doing that.

To his surprise, however, the kids started laughing. Eyes dancing, Marinette explained, "Actually, we told them that we were meeting with you, and they asked us to pass on that they were just fine. Rose said that it was scary at first, but once she realized they were just flying, it was a lot of fun."

"And Juleka said that getting a free Ironman-style ride over the town was 'totally rad,'" Nino added, uncrossing his arms to throw in some air quotes.

A tension Tony didn't even realize he'd been holding suddenly relaxed at that. Grinning, he crossed his own arms over his chest, standing with hips cocked. "And now I get to be part of the cool kids' Ex-Supervillain club. How awesome is that?"

Alya and Nino looked at each other and grinned. "Don't worry, you two," Alya said cheerfully, patting Adrien and Marinette on the shoulder. "We'll let you be honorary members."

Marinette looked supremely dubious. "Thanks. I think."

"We should have a T-shirt," Nino added.

Tony reeled in mock-horror. "You mean there isn't one already? Travesty! I am totally fixing that as soon as we get on the plane." He grinned at Marinette. "Adrien says you're a pretty good designer. Wanna have a go at it?"

For just a moment, Marinette turned tomato-red. Then a glint of ooo, a challenge that Tony knew from his own mirror slipped into grey-blue eyes. "Hmmm…" she murmured thoughtfully.

Clint glanced at Natasha ruefully. "I think we just witnessed the creation of a monster," he said.

"I resemble that remark," Tony huffed, before glancing at the flight information board on the side of the room. "Whoops. Looks like they're done prepping the plane."

"Guess that's our signal to leave," Alya said with a slight pout, before grabbing Nino by the shoulder and tugging him towards the door. "Come on, let's go check the bus schedules."

"Awww, can't we just ride with Adrien again? That car is awesome."

"Do you want to risk a close encounter with Mister Agreste again?..."

"Just a moment, Marinette," Natasha said.

About to follow her friends, the girl turned and blinked at Natasha as the door swung closed behind them.

Natasha stepped over to her – not coincidentally blocking Adrien's view, as the boy went to retrieve his schoolbag from the closet.

Taking Marinette's hand, the spy slipped a USB stick into it.

Her voice was so low that Tony, standing right next to them, had to strain to hear it – even knowing what Natasha was going to say.

"Pass that on to Ladybug."

Marinette went white, eyes huge and dark as she tried to stumble back, her free hand clutching at the strap of her purse.

Natasha didn't let go, giving the girl a sharp look. "And be careful," she added. "Alya already knows you somehow set up an interview with Ladybug for her. Don't give her a reason to connect the dots and figure out that you know Ladybug."

Or someone else could figure it out. The warning hung silently in the air.

Marinette swallowed dryly as Natasha finally released her hand. Then blue-grey eyes narrowed and she nodded once, sharply, with all the determined focus that Tony associated with the Black Widow herself.

Natasha stepped back as Adrien approached, the boy looking back and forth between the two curiously. "I just remembered," she commented, back to a normal conversational volume, before he could ask for an explanation. "Adrien, I can confirm part of your hypothesis on how Ladybug and Chat Noir's powers work. They definitely seem to be less affected by inertia than they should be. And it seems that they can extend the effect to cover someone with them; I shouldn't have survived falling on Peacemonger the way we did, let alone getting away without even a bruise."

Tony nodded; she'd described that little ambush, too. "And you can totally quote her on that. And me. Which reminds me, that internship offer is still open, for when you decide you're tired of fashion."

Marinette looked completely scandalized by the very idea, but Adrien just chuckled. "You know, I don't mind the job that much," the boy said, as an attendant came through the door to announce that their flight was ready for them.

Clint smirked at him. "I dunno, kid. One of these days, someone's going to do a Ladybug and Chat Noir themed fashion show, and you know it. Think you've got what it takes to pull off a skintight black leather catsuit?"

Marinette made a strange noise with distinct overtones of my brain is in a very happy place and I think I'm going to die. And Adrien…

…smiled, his thumb idly playing with the flat-faced silver ring on his right hand.

"Oh, I meowst certainly do," he purred.

"You're being quiet."

Settling back in his seat, Tony shrugged. "Just… thinking."

Natasha and Clint both raised their eyebrows. It was almost cute, in a terrifying way, just how well they mirrored each other.

Tony waved a hand out the window as the plane continued its ascent, indicating a billboard where he could just make out Ladybug's distinctive red-and-black shape. "It's just kinda odd. We're official heroes. Got the title and the paycheck and everything. But Paris? Paris loves those two."

"Hard not to," Clint admitted. "They're good people."

Tony nearly snorted. Superheroes, he believed in, sure. Good guys? Not quite so much. But… yeah. Ladybug and Chat Noir… he was willing to count them as the exceptions that proved the rule.

That thought led to another, and he started snickering.

Clint eyed him warily. "What?"

"If the idea of Steve getting taken over by an akuma weren't pure Nightmare Fuel, I'd so want to send him here to meet them."

Natasha's lips twitched. "No you wouldn't."

Now it was Tony's turn to raise an eyebrow. "No?"

"Steve would want to adopt them."

"Honestly? That's at least half the appeal…"

AN: Many of my crossovers are born from my love of outside points of view – it's fun to play with how characters from X series would respond to the situation and characters of Y. And the characters and overall situation of Miraculous Ladybug actually slot very neatly into the world of the Avengers – you wouldn't think it, but despite the overall comedic, no-one-gets-permanently-hurt tone, if you look at some of the supervillains Ladybug and Chat Noir face, they're seriously scary! But at the same time… well. The details of the Ladybug situation are such that any visiting Avenger is going to be going, "…wait, what?"

But then I ran into a wall, because while the two series might balance surprisingly well… well. If SHIELD knew anything about Papillon's MO, they wouldn't let any of the Avengers get anywhere near Paris, because can we say akuma bait?

Then the wall grinned at me.

Oh. Hello, plot…

SHIELD gets a lot of flak for heavy-handed methods – deservedly so, in many cases. But given that they are technically dedicated to protecting the world, and most of the people who sign up do so with the goal of making a difference… Well, I just wanted to try showing a different take on SHIELD here. One where they really are trying to do what's best.

What can I say? Poor Communication Kills and paranoid leaders of secret agencies make for drama, but sometimes I just want good guys to act like good guys.

For those of you who wanted the Avengers to see right through the Paper Thin Disguises... No. This is a major rule that I follow when writing, and especially when writing crossovers: thou shalt obey the narrative laws of the fictional universe. If a Big Bad is a terrifying Big Bad, then you don't get to just declare that the heroes of another setting are so powerful that they can stomp all over him - even if logically they probably could, because the power levels of the two universes are different. If something's a major obstacle in one setting, then it will be a major obstacle to characters from any setting. And if you can't make that work in a believable way, then the two canons aren't going to mesh very well.

Hence, the glamour. The real reason Ladybug and Chat Noir's identities are never suspected, despite everything, really has to do with the tropic requirements of the genre. You're supposed to accept the improbability and suspend disbelief. But it doesn't hurt to have an in-universe explanation. And yes, the glamour really should extend to circumstantial evidence. Video cameras aside (and they most definitely should have been caught on camera when they transformed in Puppeteer, let alone the times we've seen them duck down a subway staircase and walk out the other side as civilians), Horrificator and Kung Food both involved Ladybug and Chat Noir showing up in sealed environments. Which should have been a giant clue!

The secret identities are a key element to Miraculous Ladybug. No way are some strangers going to waltz in and see through everything, because that goes against the laws of the ML universe.

(You may have noticed that I've tried to honor that even in my ANs. Because I'm writing this from the point of view of "Avengers visiting the Miraculous Ladybug setting," I've done my best to not actually give away, in as many words, who Ladybug and Chat Noir actually are. Although I doubt anyone has been fooled!)