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-how to dream again
Disclaimer: I don't own Fairy Tail
"Italics" = voice
Italics = Thoughts
Chapter 5: Lucy's Natsu
After two months of nonstop intense training, Lucy had become accustomed to her newest weapon of celestial magic; Stardress. Similar to requip, she was pleased with her new abilities and while she was very thankful to her instructors, Capricorn and Loke, deep down Lucy knew that it was mainly due to the guidance of a recent voice inside her head.
"Give some credit to yourself, child."
At first, Lucy really thought she was going crazy when she heard the voice, clearing all the stages of insanity.
First stage: Denial
"Hello child."
Lucy gasped, looking around for the source of the voice. "Who was that?! Come out!"
"I'm in your head."
"Hahahahahaha!" Lucy laughed wildly and the future her knew that if she could ever travel back in time back to this moment, she would slap herself silly.
"You know…laughing doesn't change the fact that I'm here…"
"Hah…I'm so lonely, an imaginary voice is talking to me."
"Still here…"
Second stage: Anger
"GET OUT OF MY HEAD!" Lucy shouted aloud.
"Technically, I'm not in your head but your mind."
"This is an invasion of privacy!"
"Fine, do I have permission to invade your mind?"
"Don't sass me, voice!"
"Should I take that as a permission granted?"
"Permission not granted!"
"Read my invisible lips. It'll be you and me forever~"
Third Stage: Depression
"I must really be a weirdo to hear voices in my head." Lucy muttered despondently, wrapping her arms around her knees as she huddled near the campfire.
"Voice, not voices. I'm a special voice."
"Great the voice has a tsundere personality." Lucy let out a small sob.
"Says the weirdo. Or is that nickname reserved by a certain dragon slayer?"
Lucy smiled slightly, reminiscing over the warm memories with her best friend.
"Tsundere."
Final stage: Acceptance
"I knew being the only human on this island would possibly lead to this but I really didn't expect it to happen to me." Lucy sighed unhappily.
"Trust me, you're lucky you got me."
"Right, talking to a voice I hear inside my head is a lucky thing." She sighed again.
"Would you rather have another voice?"
"Voices in general are a bad sign. Besides you are just a figment of my imagination."
"Sure." The voice suddenly got deeper.
"I don't know whether to laugh or cry. Are you a different voice?"
"Nah, it's still me." The voice snickered.
"Stupid figment of imagination that has a poor sense of humour. What should I even call you?!" Lucy scowled."
"I am nameless."
However, while this voice drove her mental with the sarcastic comebacks and constant desire to have the last word, it had slowly become a mentor to Lucy. Tutoring her in the forms of celestial magic, the voice had become much like an older sibling, with the right amount of furious nagging and gentle coaching.
It was…peaceful.
Until it all came crashing down.
"What do you mean the celestial world is in danger?! Answer me Loke!" Lucy shouted, fists clenched.
Loke and Capricorn looked up from their previous discussion with wide eyes, a furious Lucy beside them.
I knew we shouldn't have given her the stealth training yet, Loke thought, sweating.
"Well?! Answer me!" She demanded.
Loke sighed and then motioned for Lucy to sit down, while Capricorn returned back to the celestial realm.
"Remember a while back", he began, "I told you about the Celestial Knight?"
Lucy nodded, remaining silent.
"That was all true. And once again, the Yami alliance is beginning to create chaos for both Earthland and the celestial world."
"How can I help?"
Loke snapped his neck towards her, shocked yet proud of her casual response. But then he remembered Anna and shook his head.
"Lucy…I cannot let you do this. You could die!"
The air riddled with tension at that statement that was not an exaggeration or a lie, merely a fact.
And then Lucy placed a gentle hand on his knee.
"Loke, aren't we friends? If we are…then let me fight with you. Let me protect your home." She spoke in a soft but sure voice, no hesitation in her voice.
And looking at Lucy right now with a gentle smile on her face, Loke swore that he could see Anna next to Lucy, with that same smile looking at him.
That self-sacrificing smile.
And Loke cursed to himself.
After learning from Loke of the impending doom of both worlds, every moment afterwards seemed to pass too fast for Lucy's mind to catch up.
And it was when she kneeled before the Celestial King in the celestial realm that her mind finally caught up with what was happening. Immediately, doubts plagued her. She wasn't strong enough for this kind of role. She didn't have enough power. Her magic wasn't enough.
"Lucy, there is a way of gaining power quickly. But it will have consequences. Do you trust me?"
Lucy thought deeply to herself. To walk on the same path as Erza…Gray…Natsu… To save everyone…
"Yes, whatever it takes. Make me stronger." Lucy softly whispered to herself.
With her permission, the voice spoke words imbued with power, casting a spell that sealed away all of Lucy's memories of Fairy Tail deep within her.
And with it, her Fairy Tail mark faded, releasing an unnoticeable glow.
And Lucy of Fairy Tail was no more.
"Lucy Heartfilia, will you swear to protect the celestial realm?" The Celestial King rumbled.
"I will."
"Do you promise to use the powers granted to you righteously and only in the name of justice?"
"I do."
"Then with my authority as Celestial King, I grant you the title of Celestial Knight."
"Thank you. It's an honour."
Loke watched from his position near the Celestial King as Lucy's mouth twitched up in a smile but couldn't help but feel it wasn't her usual Lucy smile.
I knew she wasn't ready yet, he thought, I never should have mentioned it. But as he watched his master raise her right hand to brush back a few stray blonde hairs, his blood froze.
Her fairy tail mark is…gone? She had it before she came to the celestial realm so whatever happened must have occurred here.
And then he sensed it. A presence hovering over Lucy. He couldn't determine whether it was friend or foe, yet something about it felt familiar. He strode over to Lucy in fast strides before grabbing her shoulders.
"Lucy, where's your Fairy Tail mark?!"
"…Fairy Tail…? What is that, Loke?"
Loke reeled back in shock. Her memories! They've been tampered with! It must have been because of that—
"Lucy, have you been hearing a voice in your head lately?" He shook her vigorously.
She was about to answer when her eyes suddenly became blank and then slowly shone with an otherworldly glow.
"Calm yourself, spirit. Lucy is fine."
The speaker was Lucy, the voice was Lucy's, yet it was not Lucy.
"Who are you?! What have you done to my master?!" Loke demanded angrily.
"I have removed her memories of Fairy Tail and Fairy Tail alone. Nothing more, nothing less." She said offhandedly.
"Give them back. They are her family!" He shouted.
"I cannot."
"Rubbish! You mean you will not." He said in a deadly voice.
"That is true. I will not and cannot for I do not possess the key."
"Key?! Who are you?! Why did you do this to Lucy?!"
"This is her first trial. To be the successor of her predecessor"
"What use does taking away these memories have?"
"Independence."
"She has untapped potential, hindered by her dependence of others. She is too afraid of being a weakness to others and became over-reliant on the Fairy Tail members."
"…"
"Do not tamper with the seal. You must allow Lucy to find confidence in her own strength to walk the path she has chosen."
"To be the successor of her predecessor…" Loke was flabbergasted, his mind running in circles. "Who…who are you?"
The person in question, smiled with Lucy's body.
"That is not for you to know. Besides, my time is up. Until we meet again…" Lucy fell unconscious and Loke quickly wrapped his arms around her waist to keep her propped up.
Loke sighed deeply, the only thought running through his mind being, Natsu is going to kill me.
The guild was silent as Mira drew a red cross over another day on the calendar.
Five months had passed since Lucy's absence.
And while the guild maintained its liveliness and cheer, there was an undercurrent of worry, fear, and desperation to see their beloved blonde. After all, since her decision to leave, there had been no news, no mark, not a single trace of Lucy by any of their guild members, nor by any of the other guilds.
And as if their situation wasn't depressing enough, Natsu had changed.
It was strange though. Gajeel had laughed it off as dragon puberty so Levy, ever the curious observer had decided to document Natsu's behaviour.
At the beginning of Lucy's absence, Natsu had maintained a positive outside, laughing and joking with his fellow guildmates. Everyone could see it was clearly forced and Levy had dubbed it as the first personality: Broken Natsu.
Personality two had been a lot more subtle and was not evident until Natsu had gotten really, really drunk, like drunk off his ass drunk. That had been when he had burst into tears and clung onto the closest person which to everyone's amusement, had been none other than Gray.
Moreover Natsu started to rant in a high pitched voice, still crying and clinging to Gray. It was truly one of those sad, happy events. In honour of that, Levy affectionately named the personality: Tsundere Natsu.
On the other hand, personality three had been as subtle as an explosion. Let's just say it had taken all of the guild with the exception of Master, magic binding shackles and rope and lots of pictures of Lucy to finally appease the slayer. The guild unanimously agreed to call that: Dragon Natsu.
But Levy's favourite definitely had to be the last personality or more like the original Natsu. While nowadays it was rare for Natsu to act like the real Natsu, each time it did, the guild regained a little bit of its happiness. While this was basically the real Natsu, Levy couldn't help name the personality in her records: Lucy's Natsu.
Levy smiled sadly, reading through the small journal that she hoped to one day give Lucy to read.
Come back soon Lu-chan…I don't know how much longer Natsu can wait…
One year later
"Are you ready for your first mission?" A voice asked teasingly.
A hooded figure smirked and placed one foot near the cliff edge overwatching Magnolia, their black cloak fluttering wildly behind them.
"I was born ready."
HAHA CLIFFHANGER! In my hope to make this story deviate from the usual plotline and make Lucy stronger in a different way from the usual whoa she's a dragon slayer now, I experienced severe writer's block but that's okay cause we're kinda back!
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