A/N: Explanation time, guys. You certainly deserve it.
Recently, I've been struggling to find the motivation to write. I'm going through a lot in my personal life that has been sapping all of my energy away. I'm in the process of seeking help but in doing this I've sacrificed a lot of time that I would normally spend on my computer. It's no secret that computers don't help a person's mental state so I've been trying to cut down on my laptop time.
My stories are taking a hit due to this. I can't write as often as I used to, meaning that I don't update as frequently as I used to. It's been a month since I touched this story and all I could conjure up is a short sneak peek. I can only apologize. I'm not enjoying writing as much as I used to, and that's something that terrifies me.
I'm not ditching this story. I know that I left Me Katniss, You Peeta on a long hiatus not too long ago. I don't want this to happen again just as much as I hope you guys do. I'm working my hardest to try to pump out chapters but-as I've always said-I don't want to sacrifice the quality of my work just to increase the number of updates I produce. So, I will not be updating as much as I used to.
Just know that I am doing everything that I can to try to improve my productivity and hopefully get back into a more frequent pattern again. I do not want to leave any of my stories unfinished again but I hope you understand why there may be large updating gaps.
I am sorry. I hope you guys will be willing to stick by me and Me Katniss, You Peeta through this rough patch. Your love and support as readers has always been the reason why I've kept writing and it's what inspires me to try to help myself improve. Thank you for understanding and staying with me and my work.
Disclaimer: I do not own The Hunger Games or Tarzan.
Chapter Sixteen: Sneak Peek
I know who the father of Delly's baby is. It's obvious that it's Gale. Not only did I catch them exiting the house of flowers in secret, but Peeta himself even said that Delly had fancied him, that's why he had been at the Homecoming Ball. All the signs point to this Gale fellow. The real question is, where can I find him? How can I find him? Most importantly, if he knows that Delly's child is his, will he want to become involved?
If he doesn't, I will force him. There will be no room for argument.
The most difficult thing of all, however, will be getting Delly to even admit that she has cheated on Peeta at all.
According to Peeta, Delly has continued to be adamant that she has not been unfaithful. She is insistent that the baby she carries belongs to her husband, despite its impossibility. Her friends believe her, they don't have any reason not to. Primrose and I are suspicious, and I know that Madge is as well. Madge is a clever woman, clever to the extent of wishing to remain out of the affairs of others. I know she is wise in this decision, but that opportunity is long gone for me. I'm in too deep.
The house is empty besides one person. I make my way through the corridors with ease. It wasn't hard for me to map the layout of Peeta's shelter in my mind, I've memorized much larger terrains in much shorter lengths of time. I know where to find her and it almost feels as if she's waiting on me. I don't hear a single footfall heading my way, no creak in another room, no scraping of a chair far in the distance, she is clearing standing still. She hears me coming. She's expecting me.
I open the door that leads out onto the patio and there she stands. Still as a statue, the afternoon sky lighting her pale, glowing skin to a point where she almost looks unreal. Despite everything, I have always been conditioned to appreciate beautiful things, and I never could doubt Delly's attractiveness. She has a natural celestial glow that followed her even before she was pregnant. I'm not threatened by this. I enjoy how I look and no one will ever make me feel bad about that. Besides, appreciating someone else's beauty does not dispose your own. Everyone views beauty differently: some will look at moss and see beauty in how in grows and consumes, others will look at moss and think of it as gross. It's how the individual sees it.
She doesn't look at me.
"I thought you would be gone by now," she admits.
I wonder why. Just because she's pregnant now? That doesn't make any sense-
Wait. Does Delly know that I know about Peeta's being unable to have children?
"It's pointless hanging around any longer. If you believe he will leave me now that I'm with child, then you're most definitely deluded."
I approach her, rounding the garden furniture and standing beside her on the edge of the patio. She glances at me momentarily before returning her gaze to the garden. I copy her stance, looking out across the land behind their shelter. My eyes immediately find the house of flowers and lock there by instinct.
"Unless you intend to wander around our home as a lonely fourth party for the remainder of your days, it could be arranged. However, I'd say that you'd always feel like an outsider looking in that way, especially when our boy is born."
My eyebrows draw together. How in the world does she already know she's carrying a son? I know boys are most desirable-for some bizarre reason-but she surely hasn't assumed that she's carrying one purely on instinct? Well, you know what they say about a mother's instinct, I suppose . . .
"You remember the night we bumped into each other in the corridor? That's when I conceived." Delly's hand goes to her stomach and she rubs. "How lucky are we that the first night we are intimate in so long is when we finally conceive."
My head turns and I stare at her profile. Her eyes are so distant, like she's reminiscing on the night in question. She doesn't look like she's all there. Like her physical body is standing here beside me but her mind has gone somewhere else completely. Don't tell me that she's so unbalanced that she actually believes her own lies? Is that possible?
"You will leave once he's born." Delly makes this a statement. I raise my eyebrows but she still won't look at me properly. Almost like she doesn't care what I have to say on this matter. "We don't need you here anymore. You won't distract him anymore. Once he's born, his attention will be back on me. Not on you."
She's not saying any names and it's becoming difficult to discern who she is talking about, whether it be Peeta or her unborn 'son'. All she is using are male pronouns. She falls silent after that and continues to stare the garden, directly where my gaze used to lie: On the house of flowers. I wish I knew what was going on inside her head. I wish I knew what she was thinking about.
There's no mistaking the lowkey hysterical tone to her voice, like under the hundreds of layers of determination and stubbornness, Delly Mellark is slowly losing her mind. And with that unsettling thought in mind, I can't help but fear that maybe she truly is.
A/N: This chapter is unbetaed so please excuse any typos. Please R&R with your thoughts! I love you all and thank you for understanding what's going on right now. Your support means the world to me.