AN: new chapter
I do own or profit from The Walking Dead.
Chapter 4
Time was never something that Carol had ever possesed in great quantities. Before the turn it seemed Ed micromanaged her time to the last moment. Every second of her day had been regulated all devoted to Ed and his comfort. God forbid she ever stepped out of line, messed up his schedule.
Since the turn things had been different, but still somehow the same. Carol had felt an ever present urgency to make every moment count, to make every moment. Especially since she had lost Sophia.
She would never forget the day Sophia had walked out of that barn. Had it not been for T-Dog she would have thrown herself at Sophia and allowed her daughter to finish her once and for all.
She and T had become close when the farm had fallen. The months on the road had been hard on all of them. They'd even entertained the idea of a romantic relationship. Their one attempt at taking their relationship to the next step had dissolved into a fit of mutual giggles.
"Like kissing my sister" T had laughed.
They had agreed to stay friends and she'd been grateful to have that. T hadn't understood what she had been through with Ed and the loss of Sophia, but he was a good listener and he had ways of prying her feelings out of her like no one else.
When she lost T, she felt even more alone. An urgency had settled into her bones. She could never let down her guard. She could never be docile. She needed to couldn't loose anyone else. Karen and David had been an impulse really. David had been breathing his last when she had found him, Karen not far behind.
Rick banishing her hadn't been a surprise. What had been a surprise was finding Tyreese and Lizzie and Mika.
Lizzie, her heart ached at the thought of the little girl's clear blue eyes that were clouded by madness. She hadn't had time, to think, to really grieve before now. She had to investigate Alexandria. Make sure it was safe. She hadn't had a moment to let herself feel, until now.
The guys had pushed a bed in the corner of the room, close to the fireplace so the heat would find her toes.
She stared at the delicate pattern on the wallpaper as the past few months. Hell the past two years threatened to overwhelm her. The pain hit her hard like a tsunami washing over her drowning her in sorrow as she gasped trying to hold back the tide of tears.
"Hey" she felt his hand, hesistant on her shoulder. Daryl. Why did he of all the men she had met seem to inspire this feeling of safety in her? Of belonging.
She gasped again as he squeezed her shoulder "you alright?" He asked his voice rough with concern. She heard the other men in the room become still, their attention drawn to her and Daryl. She rolled over onto her back, her eyes staring up at him, drowning in a hundred or more unshed tears.
"No." She said simply shaking her head.
He seemed confused for a moment, checking her over looking for worsening signs of her physical injuries, until his eyes met hers and he realized what she meant.
Gingerly he helped her sit her a sip of water.
"Carol...where's your girl?" He whispered,his eyes barely meeting hers.
TThe dam broke. Her shoulders shook unable to hold it in anymore. "she's gone." She said her voice more of a moan between sobs.
His arms came around her slowly, she watched over his shoulder as the other three men filtered out of the room, all three eying her with grim faces as she held on to Daryl's shoulders.
She had time, for the first time. Time to cry, to grieve, every moment that she had lost, as she cried into his shoulder her fingers twisting the material of his shirt.
He was not a man accustomed to giving comfort, he was awkward and tense, but he tried and for some reason she felt like he understood.
When she was numb, she lay back down, turning to her side. Not even surprised when he got into bed behind her, spooning her body. His arm banding around her waist.