Violet
She was absolutely perfect. She had J's crystal blue eyes and my platinum blonde hair. From the second she was born she had her daddy wrapped around her tiny finger. Every time she cried he was up and by her side in a flash, making sure she was not hurt. He would sit by my side as I breastfed, letting her hold one of his fingers in her little hand. I started pumping when she was a month old and from then on he took over her night time feedings; it gave me some much needed sleep and J more bonding time with Violet. Her full name was Violet April Quinn; Violet after her father's favorite color, purple, April after the month she was born, 4:16 a.m. on April 1st, and Quinn, my last name since J doesn't have one. We fought for months before she was born about what to name her. It couldn't just be any common name for our princess. Before she was born I could never imagine J changing a diaper; he didn't change many, but when he did I couldn't help but watch. It was so odd, here was the most dangerous man in Gotham up to his elbow in baby poop.
When she was three months old, Violet got sick. She had a very high fever and a bad cough. The doctor said it was just a cold but I had a feeling it was so much worse. Poor Violet couldn't sleep and when she couldn't sleep neither could I. J wasn't home when she first got sick, he had gone on a business trip to Metropolis. I had called him in hysterics after the doctor left and he came home as fast as he could. I hoped as soon as she was in her father's arms she would settle, but she didn't. She was sick for four more before we called the doctor again. I was a mess and J looked more stressed that I had ever seen him when the doctor told us she had pneumonia and needed to go to the hospital immediately. I was terrified, I didn't want my baby to die, but I knew that as soon as Gordon and the Bat found out about Violet they would take her away from us. The fear in the nurses' eyes all turned to concern when they saw the sick infant in my arms; "Please help her" I pleaded. J and I followed the doctor and nurses as they went to examine her. J promised not hurt anyone, he even emptied his gun and gave them his bullets, as long as they all swore to keep this all a secret, which they all did. They let us stay with her in a private room while Violet laid in an incubator, connected to a feeding tube and an oxygen mask. She was kept in the hospital for two weeks. I spent most day in J's arms as I cried or listened to him tell Violet stories as I tried to sleep. After the first six days I collapsed in the bathroom from a combination of exhaustion and dehydration. I woke up several hours later hooked up to an IV drip. J was sitting in-between my bed and the incubator looking worse for wear; "I can't lose both of you" he choked out. In seven years I had only seen him cry a few times. I reached out to stroke his hair and felt him relax under my touch. We did not hesitate to leave the hospital as soon as Violet was given a clean bill of health. They gave us some medications to give her and let us out the doctor's entrance. J made sure everyone who helped us was left a more than generous tip.
At five months Violet laughed for the first time. I was baking muffins while she sat in her high chair munching on some cheerios. I didn't realize J had come home until I felt something wet on the top of my head…batter. I was red in the face, about to give him a piece of my mind when we heard a tiny giggle. I turned around to see Violet with a wide grin on her face, just like her father's. J ran over and lifted her out of her high chair, spinning her around trying to get her to giggle again; he really did love her. A month later saw her crawling for the first time and once she started the little devil never stopped. If someone took their eyes off of her for a second, they would lose her. She was incredibly fast and liked to hide in small spaces. Now that she was mobile Bud and Lou had started to take more of an interest; she would spend hours chasing them around the penthouse. They were good with her and only growled when she yanked on their tails. J hadn't been too happy to lock up all of his weapons but when she got a hold on his favorite gun, empty thankfully, he agreed it was a good idea. We were planning on introducing her to the family business eventually, just not yet. We had talked about it and agreed that she would get her first weapon, a baseball bat at my insistence, on her first birthday; he had already started the design for it but refused to let me see it.
When she was eight months old I found out I was pregnant again. I did the math and figured out I was only about three weeks along so I decided against telling J for a couple of weeks. I wasn't sure how he would take it, even though he loved Violet I knew he didn't want to be a "family man." All my fear, however, disappeared when I told him; he didn't react as happily as he did when I told him about Violet but he still grinned from ear to ear. The next two months went by and everything was amazing until one night I woke up to horrible stomach pains. At first I thought it was just morning sickness but as soon as I felt the stickiness between my thighs I knew what it was; I lost the baby. My screams startled J out of sleep. He looked furious until I tore the covers away from me and he saw the blood. He yelled for Johnny to call the doctor. I was shaking and sobbing, I had no idea what to do; I felt paralyzed. J got back into bed and cradled me in his arms, rocking me in silence. He knew not to say anything to me. When the doctor came she confirmed what I already knew, my baby was dead. She helped clean me up while henchman changed the sheets and got rid of the old ones and my soiled night clothes. I was exhausted and still in pain so the doctor gave me something to help me out before she left. For the next week I refused to get out of bed except to pee. I just sat in bed and cried while I half paid attention to whatever channel J had put on for me. I had barely seen him; he spent all day in his office and his nights with Violet. I felt like a horrible mother for neglecting Violet but I was too frail to deal with her. I couldn't sleep, the feeling of my baby dying inside of me was still present and the sight of all the blood was there every time I closed my eyes. The doctor had left me some medicine meant for post-partum depression but I didn't take it, J and I hated meds. I felt as though I was in a daze and I didn't snap out of it until J had had enough. I was in bed when Violet crawled over to me and pulled herself up to try to get my attention. J was on his side of the bed working on something for the club. Violet kept grabbing at my long hair when I screamed at her to stop. She stared at me in fear for a few seconds before she started to cry; J had her in his arms in the blink of an eye. He glared at me while he calmly told me to start taking the medicine and get out of bed. I did as I was told and within a month I started to feel better, not my old self quite yet but better.
Violet's birthday was bittersweet. I was sad that my baby was growing up but I was excited for her to get J's present, her own personalized baseball bat. It was the perfect size for her and written in J's own handwriting was "Property of The Joker and Harley Quinn." It was littered with red and black diamonds and a purple jester hat; it was magnificent and Violet loved it. I had dressed her in a frilly purple dress and did her hair up in little pigtails. The only people at the party were Red and Johnny but it was the best party we had ever thrown. Violet was showing off her limited vocabulary, mostly just dada, mama, and up, while J let her toddle around holding his fingers. The cake was Batman's head with a knife in his head. Violet cried while we sang Happy Birthday, she was not a fan of fire ever since she witnessed me almost burn the penthouse down trying to make stir fry one night. J rocked her in his arms while I blew out the candles. She was a total daddy's girl, which I knew he secretly loved. Even Red couldn't deny he was an amazing father, even though she tried her hardest. Later that night after Violet was asleep J and I sat in bed watching the news together. I was filing my nails, not really paying attention when I heard him whisper, so softly that I almost missed it, "I love you Harley-girl." I put my nail file down and nuzzled into his neck, "I love you too Puddin."