Chapter 5

Charlie looked up as Bill stepped out of the Fireplace; he smiled at the bewildered expression on his older brother's face. The look said, very, very plainly. 'I've been to see mum to tell her I'm not coming home for Christmas this year and just got asked a million questions most of which were about the 'pretty young girl' I'm apparently going out with that's keeping me away from home and worst of all she asked me when she was going to have her first grandchild!' Charlie snickered softly and put down his book. "Have fun then?"

Bill blinked and looked at him. "Next time you are going to tell her."

"She gave you the speech then?" Charlie said, trying to keep a straight face.

"Oh yeah-I am never telling her I'm not coming home for a holiday again-why is she always picking on me for grandchildren, why not you, or the twins?" Bill asked, collapsing onto the sofa, obviously exhausted from his talk with their mother.

"You're her last hope Bill; I'm practically married to my job-the twins… well… I don't think they should be allowed to have kids; Percy's out the equation altogether; Ron is never going to get round to asking Hermione out, so that's out, and Ginny-well Ginny's too obsessed with Harry and Harry's too obsessed with himself really, so you're it Bill."

"But I don't even have a girlfriend!" Bill complained.

"Aww buck up Billy boy, it'll turn out ok, you'll find one just for you eventually." Charlie grinned.

Bill rolled his eyes and looked round the nicely decorated room. "Where's Perce?"

Charlie's grin softened and slipped. "He's digging out Christmas decorations for the tree, he needed something to do, he's been flighty all day, I think you should go talk to him Bill, I can't, I'd probably make things worse."

Bill turned to him with a frown. "How could you possibly make things worse?" he asked, surprised.

Charlie shrugged. "You know what I'm like Bill, I can never say the right thing, and I'm afraid I might set him back, you know. It's like walking on eggshells really, you've always got to think three moves ahead, and I never was much good at chess." He sighed. "You always were better at talking to him anyway."

Bill blinked, he hadn't realised just how hard this might be for Charlie, his brother had always just come out and said things without thinking, Charlie was honest sometimes to a fault, for him to have to stop and think about the reactions to what he said would be difficult to say the least. He reached over, pulled him into a half hug, and smiled reassuringly. "I'll go talk to Percy, ok?"

Charlie smiled back and nodded. "Yeah."

Bill got up and went in search of Percy, pausing only for a second to look back at Charlie, hearing the heavy sigh, watching his brother pick up the book he had been reading. Fudge was going to pay for this. But back to the more immediate problem of Percy.

He found him, ironically, in the hall closet rooting through a box of Christmas decorations. He knocked on the open door and leaned against it, watching him with a slight smile. "Hey Perce, you ok?"

Percy looked up, startled, then down again and he shrugged.

Bill tensed, Percy was withdrawing, what in the hell had happened-maybe Charlie had said something without realising. Damn. He hunkered down beside Percy. "Perce, what's wrong? Did something happen while I was out?"

Percy shook his head, pulling his hands out of the box he had been looking in to twist them together on his lap-he looked like a child waiting to be punished. "Percy." Bill said softly, reaching out he covered his brother's thin hands with his own, stopping the twisting. Percy looked up at him and there was a raw pain in his eyes Bill had never seen before. Without thinking, Bill pulled Percy towards him and into a firm hug.

When he finally pulled back minutes later, he studied Percy's face again. "Percy, what's the matter, come on, tell me." He said urgently.

Percy took a deep breath and pulled away further, looking down. "You should go h. h. home for c.chris.christmas." he stammered out finally.

Bill nearly overbalanced backwards at the words. "What?" he asked finally.

"You should go-" Percy began very quietly.

"I know what you said Perce, I want to know what you meant-you know I'm spending Christmas with you and I don't think you're ready to go home yet." Bill said softly, they had had this conversation a dozen times; he and Charlie were staying with Percy for Christmas, granted Percy hadn't agreed or disagreed with the arrangement, but both Bill and Charlie agreed that bringing Percy home in his current fragile state could prove disastrous. "Do you want to go home Percy?" Bill asked quietly, maybe this was it.

Percy actually flinched away when he said that and a look of abject terror crossed his face in a flash. "I can't go there, I can't go back!"

"Why not Percy, it's your home too, mum and dad would be glad to have you home. If you want to go we can go home for Christmas, you know we can." Bill said, fighting his shock.

Percy shook his head; his eyes were wet with tears again. "No they wouldn't they hate me-after everything I've done… am… how can they ever want me back… I don't want them to hate me.. I. I. I never wanted them to hate me Bill, never ever, ever!" he was babbling, his words tumbling over each other, but Bill heard them, and they shocked him more.

He had found it; the root of the problem, after this he just knew Percy would get better, once they cleared this up things would be looking up. "Percy, why did you leave home-it wasn't about You Know Who was it?" he had sussed this out himself, but it seemed Percy needed to get this out of his system.

Percy shook his head slowly.

"Tell me Perce."

"I had to go Bill… I had to leave before they found out… before they…" he stopped and drew in a shuddering breath, the heel of one hand digging into each eye in turn to get rid of the tears. "If they ever found out they'd hate me Bill… I didn't want to, I swear I didn't want to, but F. Fudge said he'd tell them if I didn't do what he said, I didn't want them to be hurt… so I… I didn't want them to hate me… so I... I…" he trailed off, his shoulders shook with the effort it took to keep his emotions inside.

"So you what Percy?" Bill knew what Percy was trying to say, but he needed to hear it, and Percy needed to say it.

Percy took another shuddering breath. "I didn't want them to be hurt by what I am… so I made them hate me for something else… I had that big fight with dad, I didn't want to… but just the thought… if he knew what I was… if Fudge told him… dad would be… he'd be… he'd hate me… and mum, she's always wanted… she… and I… I was stupid and selfish and… but I didn't want them to say they didn't want me Bill." He looked up at him, eyes shining with tears, brimming over with unfathomable hurt and fear, the fear he would lose his family.

Bill blinked back his own tears and swallowed the lump in his throat, but he wasn't quite able to manage it, he couldn't speak, couldn't make the words come out. Ragged breathing behind him alerted him that Charlie had joined them and heard it all. He moved instinctively as Charlie pushed into the closet and wrapped his arms tightly around Percy.

"Never Percy, never, never, never." Charlie whispered. "How could we have made you that insecure…" he pulled back and looked at Percy. "They would never have hated you Percy, never. They always wanted you to come back, every day Percy, every single day." He couldn't say anything past that; he just pulled Percy back to him.

Bill looked on; pride mingled with his tears, Charlie had nothing to worry about anymore with Percy. They wouldn't be going home for Christmas, they wouldn't be going home until Percy was ready, but this Christmas was all about family.

And finally, the elusive 'a word in the right ear' made perfect sense.