SEVEN


Note: I suck at romance. But in the spirit of Valentine's Day, here it is: I, Ke2ensky - Valentine Edition. I hope you enjoy it.

St. Paul Cathedral, Whitetail Ridge,
Tecumseh, Kathil PDZ,
Capellan March, Federated Commonwealth,
April 26, 3063

I never understood this 'wedding' business. Why did two people, who were madly in love, had to go through this process to be together? Why did they have to register to be together? Why did they have to invite families and friends to party? I did not understand why Spheroids celebrated a bond between a man and a woman in a convoluted way. From my point of view, it was a complete waste of time. But I guessed it was part of being Spheroids.

A week before the wedding, Kyle took me to a tailor. He ordered me a special suit called 'tuxedo'. It was basically a very neat pair of clothing. I had no idea that people made this kind of suit, and it felt a bit 'icky' to me. As far as I could remember, I wore shirt and pants all the time, and I was sure I did not wear tuxedo during my Clan years. This so-called tuxedo hindered my movement a lot, but it did make me look good on the mirror.

The day before the wedding, everybody gathered at some kind of temple to rehearse. Kyle would stand at the front, then a horde of men called 'groomsmen' were to pick up women, the 'bridesmaids', and walk through the aisle between rows of seats. These 'forced' pairs would be the prelude for Natalie, who would walk in our steps to meet Kyle. The officiating minister would read some ritual, and then Kyle and Natalie would exchange 'vows'. Then a big party ensued.

Kyle and Natalie agreed to add me as a groomsman, and I was in no position to object or negotiate, so I just did what he told me. My 'forced' mate was Kyle's long-time friend, Zoë Catherine. She was a very nice girl, although she mentioned that she was paired with me just as a temporary substitute. She already had a mate, and she would very much prefer to pair with her own mate. Of course she would. I would prefer not to be in this ceremony, but Kyle made us do things against our wishes. But since Kyle saved my life from Liao's mobs, I could at least grant him his wish and follow the rite without much complains.

The other groomsmen were members of Kyle's unit, the Shooting Stars. Two particular members stood up because they were ex-Jade Falcon. I still carried the memory of Jerome Helmer with me, so at first I was at strained companionship with them. But later I learnt that these ex-Clansmen had integrated into the Inner Sphere much more than I had. They admitted that now they belonged to the Shooting Star unit, working for Federated Commonwealth.

The wedding day. The bells rang, the seats were full of guests, the music transcended, the flowers fumed, and people waited with high anticipation for the two lovers to join together. Kyle was enrobed in glee and splendor. Natalie was nowhere to be seen, but I suspected her entrance would be the highlight of the hour. I stood there like an idiot, questioning what the big deal was, until it was time for groomsmen to pick up the bridesmaids. I stepped forward to fetch my bridesmaid, but to my utter surprise, she was not the one that I rehearsed with.

She was Evee. My Evee.

For a moment I froze in panic. Nobody mentioned anything about Evee being in this ceremony, and I should have guessed it, but somehow I overlooked it. It was unlike me, missing obvious details. Unbelievably ignorant. I could not meet her like this. I felt miserable in this tuxedo, and sweat beaded on my forehead. I stood still, staring at her with fiasco in my mind, until she gestured me to keep moving toward her, smiling at my awkward discomfort. I came back to my senses, and I offered her my right hand, into which Evee hooked her left.

"I always imagine how you look in a tuxedo," she whispered while we walked in the aisle. "And I'm not disappointed. You look marvelous."

"Where were you yesterday?" I fired off my anxiety, almost in full force. "Why did you miss the rehearsal? Why does nobody inform me about you?"

"Delay, delay, and delay," she explained in a whisper. "My flight stuck in the middle of nowhere. I should have been here last week, but instead I just arrived a couple hours ago. But Kyle never mentioned that you were going to be here either. What brought you here?"

"My inability to reject Kyle's persuasive invitation," I smiled.

"Yeah, sounds like Kyle," she responded, holding my arm tighter. "Anyway, good to see you again."

"Always the same," I held her hand closely. "Always the same."

I had lots to ask, but we had to follow the ceremony and parted for a moment. We stood at the opposite side of the row. I could not believe what I saw. She was a goddess, wrapped in pink satin dress. Her low cut underlined her naked shoulder and her cleavage, still as firm as the way I always remembered it. Her golden hair was partially tucked behind her head, with a train of small flowers as the headband. And she wore this angelic smile of hers, generously showing it to me all the time. I had never seen her like this, and even in my wildest imagination, I could not possibly come up with this unearthly landscape that was she.

She was beautiful.

I could not get my eyes off her. Even when Natalie made her grand entrance, I could not stop gazing at Evee. My eyes watched her the entire time, throughout the ceremony, to the point the official announced Mr. and Mrs. Kyle Garret, my eyes were glued to her. I did not know what it was, but her smile seemed a thousand times prettier than what I always remembered. Perhaps it was her dress. Or perhaps it was her make up. Or perhaps I was carried away by the entire wedding ambience. I did not know.

Then it was time for us to leave, so I picked her up and escorted her to the second level of the building. It was a madhouse, a completely different atmosphere than the first. People talked, laughed, yelled, joked, ranted, vented, gossiped… all kinds of things. Kyle and Natalie initiated the toast and dance, and then everybody followed their step into the dance floor.

I sat on a table with Evee watching people lost themselves in joyous celebration. Our eyes met a number of times, but nobody said anything. There were so many memories, good and bad, that we did not know what to start. We just indulged ourselves in each other's presence, and sunk ourselves in those memories.

"You look beautiful today, Evee," I finally had the courage to break the ice. "You always are, but today you are…" I could not finish my sentence.

"Thank you," she smiled oh-so-beautifully. "Amazing what make-up artists can do to you, don't you think? Hey, you look pretty yourself. I see that you and Kyle are prizefighter buddies now."

"Not exactly buddies," I cringed. "More like friendly rivals."

"Too bad," she shook her head. "He's a great guy. But the least I can imagine of you is fighting for money. I can't understand how you discard your annoying philosophies and go into prizefighting. Aren't you always the one who says prizefighting degenerates the sanctity of war? You caught me off guard here."

I sighed. I could only offer one explanation. "Man changes."

"Of course you do," Evee drew a deep breath. "And I hope it's for your better deed."

"I hope so too," I reclined on my chair. "How about you?"

"Fine, can't complain," she nodded. "The first half year was really hard. I thought losing my father was the lowest point of my life. Clearly, I was mistaken. But over time I realized that I lived in reality, and I just couldn't get everything I wanted. So I wrote a proposal to my employers, and from what I heard, the chance of getting a grant is very good. Soon I'll be doing what any girl loves to do: shopping. My dream is to command an RCT, so we are recruiting, training, and buying assets. Three runaways from Dieron Light Brigade had joined my force. These ex-Kuritan warriors provided invaluable skills and experiences for the locals."

Her words tore up an old wound. The whole gamut of our time together went back into my mind like a torrential rain, from the moment we first met, to the moment we parted in a flood of tears. I remembered every detail of what we did together. And albeit I was the one that wanted it to end, I could not count the times when I regretted my decision. I understood what she went through, and I was relieved that she handled everything just fine.

"That is quite an accomplishment," I smiled. "Your father must be proud of you. Evee, explain me something," I paused for a moment, gathering everything that had been bugging me. "What is so special about wedding? Why do you have to do odd things just to be together with your partner? Can you just go together?"

"A wedding is a celebration of love and commitment," Evee cooed, grinning from ear to ear. "Two individuals in love with each other will promise that they will stay with their partner in any circumstances. No forces can separate them. Their bond is like a chain that will only break if one, or both of them, dies. Some couples choose the traditional rites like this one. Others go for simplicity and elope, just the way you said. I guess Kyle and Natalie want it to be a traditional one."

"But why do you have to make it so complicated?"

"You won't understand, and you are not supposed to understand. Weddings are…" Evee paused, blushing like a red rose. "Weddings are girls' one-time show. We dream a wedding since we're toddlers. Perfection differs from girl to girl, but we all want the same: a perfect wedding. Being in a wedding means being the prettiest girl in the entire hall, and surely, getting the most attention. But that's not the most important thing. We want to be pretty for the men we choose, the men we love, the 'perfect' men who will love us just the same thirty years from now, when we are not pretty anymore. We want to be happy."

"And how do you know if someone is the perfect man?"

Evee did not answer right away. She averted her eyes, watching Kyle and Natalie dancing on the center, followed by a bunch of half-drunk couples. Her eyes spurted envy as her pupils followed the happy couple wherever they went. "We know. It's not science. We don't know how we know, we just know."

My next question was just on the tip of my tongue, but I reined it in. I did not want to invade this territory with my lack of knowledge, especially when Evee was the one who would weather my ignorance. I already damaged her mood, I did not want to ruin the entire evening for her.

"I am sorry I made you upset," I quickly tried to control the damages. "I just try to make sense of everything."

"I know you do," she smiled, deftly covering her glassy eyes. "You always do, Parker. Sometimes I wonder if you would discard that smug, proud, Clan-way of thinking of yours and see things from a Spheroid's perspective. You think too much."

"I sincerely apologize. Is there anything that I can make it up to you?"

She glanced at Kyle and Natalie again, and when the music changed to a slower, mellow tune, she grabbed my arm and tugged it, grinning widely, "Dance with me."

Dance? She knew quite well that I could not dance. My body was designed to fight, not to move in harmony with the music. That, and the absence of practice, would put me in a very humiliating position. I did not understand why, of all the things that we could do, she chose to dance.

"Evee, I uh…" I chuckled in nervousness. "I cannot dance."

"You speak of it as if it's a death execution," she snickered, tugging my hand even more. "Come on, I'll show you. Now I need you to relax. Grab my right hand with your left, and put your right hand under my shoulder blade. Look into my eyes, and feel the music. Regard it as a breeze that blows into you. Then sway slowly. Follow the music. Don't think, just feel."

I did everything she told me, but they just did not work right.

"Don't move like a robot. Relax, Parker. Don't put too much pressure. You have to move with your feelings. You're the cloud, and the music is the wind. So move with the wind."

I tried the best I could, but this was just not my territory, and I wonder what I was thinking when I complied to dance with Evee. But she never complained about me embarrassing her. She kept her eye contact, encouraging me in funny metaphors like winds, clouds, water, rain, leaves, and other natural phenomena. Sometimes I wondered why I fell in love with her. We had nothing in common whatsoever.

But after a while, with her constant encouragements and instructions, finally I got the hang of it. I still moved like a robot, but I slowly got the idea how to move in sync with the music. I could not describe the sensation. It was weird, fun, confusing, scary, and disheartening at the same time, but it gave me a sense of closeness to Evee the way I could have never imagined. We moved together in a perfect harmony, with the music as our energy.

"You feel it?" she chimed in glee. "That's better. Keep going, you'll love it!"

Then the music changed to a very harmonious one. I listened to the lyric, and somewhat the music moved me to my deepest end. The similarity with our life was eerie, as if the song was written specifically for us. I affirmed my grip on Evee's hand and drew her closer, until she rested her head on my shoulder. Together we swayed as the song filled the air. The feel of her skin on my fingertips brought back so many memories of our passion, that I started thinking maybe – just maybe – we can work everything out.

I can't remember what I used to do
Who I trusted, whom I listened to before
I swear you've taught me everything I know
Can't imagine needing someone so
But through the years it seems to me I need you more and more

Through the years, through all the good and bad
I knew how much we had
I've always been so glad to be with you
Through the years it's better everyday
You've kissed my tears away
As long as it's okay I'll stay with you

"Aw, Parker," Evee moaned. "What a great life we had, wasn't it?"

"Yes, it was," I replied gently on her ear. "I do not know if we can call it a 'life', but it was certainly great. I only wish it could be longer."

"Hm hm," she wrapped her arm around my neck. "Last time we parted, I didn't take it well because I didn't want it to end. I tried to own you and behaved like a brat. It's what makes it hard for both of us. Over the year I realized that some things are just not meant to be. I love you, Parker, I will always do. Parting with you is the hardest thing I have to endure. But it taught me many things. I am not what I am today if you succumbed to my childish plea. So thank you. Thank you for being my perfect man, even though it was only for such a short time."

I wanted to tell her how much I would miss her every day, every week, every year. I wanted to tell her that I lived an empty life without her, that nobody had and nobody would fill in the space the way she did. I gazed into her eyes, then said everything that I should have said long time ago.

I kissed her.

No, I did not say it with words. I said everything what I had to say to her by mashing my lips into her, unleashing months of hunger. Oh, how I missed those lips! Nothing in this forsaken world could match her lips. I could sense her fear, her confusion, her desire, all blended into an initial quiver; afterward, she met my thirst with equal firepower. For a moment, we floated into our own world.

When we parted, she looked into my eyes, and I knew she understood what I wordlessly said. Her eyes twinkled, and a small smile escaped her lips, "Make love to me? For one last time?"

I looked into her eyes, and even though I still could see the sorrow and regret, I knew she was handling it like a warrior that she had always been. "Are you sure it will not complicate our relationship? I mean, we barely get over our parting."

"Parker, I don't know when I will see you again," she replied, "if, I will ever see you again. I want to remember you the best possible way. Unless you want to keep dancing."

No, of course not. I liked the way dancing gave us connection, but like Evee said, I would not want to remember my last time with her embarrassing myself. No, I had enough dancing. I gave her a smile, then towed her to the side behind the counter before slipping away from the crowd. I gave one last gaze at Kyle and Natalie before going straight to the door.