FIFTEEN


Note: This chapter contains strong sexual reference. Reader's discretion is advised.

Solaris Gaming Commission,
Solaris City, Solaris VII,
Freedom Theater, Lyran Alliance,
May 10, 3064

Everything was a waste of time.

The Solaris Gaming Commission launched a televised investigation of the incident, blowing it up into a media extravaganza. Maxwell's stable charged Daniels and me with cheating and breaking laws. I did not feel I broke any law. I did not shut down when the match started, the decision that I would never regret. I did, however, shot Maxwell from the back when he was engaging Joey, but I did it before and nobody said anything. Maxwell's stable made a big deal about it, and it became the base of their accusation. These processes were broadcast nationally. But the tedious month of investigation was just a feigned pageantry. Maxwell never hid his association with La Cosa Nostra, and it was no secret that the number one crime syndicate owned more than half the officials at SGC. I knew the verdict of this investigation long before it wrapped up.

I always knew that La Cosa Nostra would react strongly to the death of 'Mad' Maxwell, just like the Grey Wolves after I killed Thunder Thorley. But instead of trying to harm me physically, they retaliated by ending my career as Solaris fighter. For an everyday Solaris fighter, arena fighting was their life. They assumed I was one of them, and they wanted to make me suffer by robbing me from what I did best.

Fortunately, they assumed wrong.

"I can't believe you can be this stupid," Kyle said to me the other day. "What were you thinking, taking on La Cosa Nostra by yourself? They have arms in almost every aspect of Solaris. You can't beat them, not like this. Now look what you've done to yourself!"

"I am doomed either way," I replied apathetically. "La Cosa Nostra want me out of the competition, so they put me with Maxwell in the opening game. Even if I won the game fair and square, they would find things to expel me. You said it yourself, they had many arms, and they could get me from every direction."

"So you go with Daniels to cheat death," Kyle snorted. "How quaint. Why didn't you let me help you?"

"And what exactly can you do?" I finished my drink. "I think their zeroing in on me was largely due to the fact that they associated me with House Davion. Your help would bury me deeper into this civil war mess. I greatly appreciate your concern, but I think you better leave me alone on this one. In fact, it is better if I do not receive assistance from House Davion in any kind."

"So that's how you see our help," Kyle scoffed. "An incentive for your support for the Davions."

"People do not see it otherwise."

"Since when do you care about people?" Kyle said coldly. "If you want to be neutral, that's fine with me. But if you think you can survive alone, you're sadly mistaken. Your Clan logic will not comprehend the intricate Solaris criminal minds. This is just the beginning, Parker. Without guidance, you'll sink deeper and deeper into Solaris mud pool, and when you realize you're drowning, everything is too late."

"No," I looked into his eyes. "This is the end. I know what will happen. This investigation will lead to 1 conclusion only: my expunction from Solaris circuit. So just let it happen. That way, I do not have to commit to Daniels anymore. I can visit a brain surgeon at Atreus as the doctor at Indrahar suggested. Perhaps he can restore my memory. I think I will be happier knowing who I once was, than being a Solaris poster board for FedCom Civil War."

"I want you to have your memory back, but not like this," Kyle let out a long sigh. "I want you retire from Solaris as a champion, a legend, a name that people sing with awe. I don't want you to leave Solaris banished like a loser. You won't forgive yourself."

"The truth is, Kyle," I paused briefly, looking at him in the earnest, "I do not care anymore."

Yes, it was the truth. Solaris promised me fame and wealth in exchange of rectitude. I never wanted those things. I felt that I already lost half of my integrity, and I did not want to lose the rest. This life, this world was not for me, and perhaps this incident could serve as my exit out of Solaris.

So I kept my composure as the SGC commissar took the stand to read the verdict. I shot a quick glance at Daniels beside me. He was nervous. His hands flexed and released, his lids fluttered, and sweat beaded in his forehead. Newsmen took pictures and videos of us before the commissar knocked the table, asking for attention. He put on the glasses and cleared his throat before reading the verdict.

"In the accusation of cheating and obstruction of fair play conducted by Daniels Stable," the SGC commissar read the decision, "the Solaris Gaming Commission found Daniels Stable guilty. Daniels Stable is thus scratched from all the circuits of Solaris City, excluding Class-One to Class-Three competitions outside the city. Furthermore, the Solaris Gaming Commission decided to revoke Parker's fighting license indefinitely."

"No! This is not fair!" Daniels stormed the jury. "The defendants wish to appeal!"

But I would smile if I could. I would shake the commissar's hand if I could. By revoking my license, the SGC broke my bind to Daniels. Of course I would leave Solaris like a loser, as Kyle mentioned to me. But my inner Clan did not bask on such glory. I had enough money to go to Atreus and fund my surgery, if I still had a bit of luck. If everything went well, perhaps I could make things right.

Kinebatu Travel, Montenegro,
Solaris City, Solaris VII,
Freedom Theater, Lyran Alliance,
May 19, 3066

"How could you be so boorish?"

I let Daniels launched his regiment of insults. He was mad, he was embarrassed, and he was desperate. I had been his primary source of income the past 2 years, and he did not want to lose me. He knew he would succumb to the same world prior our fateful meeting. The world full of failures, alcohol, and impossible dreams.

But come to think of it, he brought everything upon himself. He was the one that bribed the juries of the match. He was the one that tried to outsmart La Cosa Nostra. Had he not done what he had done, he would have been spared from Steiner's punishing arms, and could hold his head high. He would still lose me, but at least his stable would not be expelled from elite competitions.

He was killed by his own greed.

"Mister Daniels, the SGC revoked my license," I weathered the storm, speaking distinctly to make him understand the situation. "I cannot fight without license. Why do you insist on keeping me here if I cannot provide you with victories? I do not want to burden you."

"Give me some time to work things out," he said, a slight tremor was imminent in his voice. "I can get your license back. I still have friends in the SGC…"

"Mister Daniels, how many 'friends' have you bribed?" I said matter-of-factly. "How much money have you spent to make things the way it were? And how many people have claimed to be your friends these days? Face it, Mister Daniels: it will not work. Just let it go. We are fighting a battle we cannot win. Let me know if you succeed," I gave him a sour smile. "I will be at Atreus."

I was about to leave him to buy ticket off world when three strangers came into my presence. I had never seen them before. The woman in the middle was chic, somewhat alluring in her forties or fifties, wearing swanky dress with swaggering coat made from animal. Her red hair peeked below some kind of a hat, and her twinkling earrings drooped every time she moved her head. The other two were muscular men who fell quickly under the class of bodyguards.

"Mister Parker, I presume," her voice was sultry. "Pardon my rude intervention, but you are practically trying to proclaim your problem to the entire Kinebatu customers. I am aware of your trouble, and I believe I have the solution."

"Parker belongs to Daniels Stable," Daniels quickly interrupted. "You want something, you talk to me."

The woman shot a derogatory stare at Daniels, but she decided to yield to his demand. "Alright, Mr. Daniels, I'll talk to you, although I believe you can't be much of benefit for me. See, my husband holds a position as the secretary of Solaris Gaming Commission. I know that SGC decision was largely piggybacked by La Cosa Nostra. It's not your fault to get kicked out of elite circuit. It just shows that you don't have the right back up on the committee. Now I'm sure you heard this a lot, Mr. Daniels, but my position as the wife of SGC secretary gives me advantage no one can have. I can restore your status."

"Pardon me for my rude manner, milady," Daniels turned soft. "How can this simple man please you?"

"Ah, a man of pleasure, you are," she chortled. "But like I said, you have nothing I want. I want him."

Me? I did not understand. Why did she want my money? I did not have as much money as Daniels. But she did not say I want his. She said I want him while pointing at me. What did she want from me? Did she want me to fight under her banner? Possibly. But Daniels would have had to resign me, and I doubted he would do it.

"I do not have many things to offer, Ma'am," I stated. "I do not understand what you want from me."

"Well, what a naïve gem you are," she sniggered. "Isn't Clanner supposed to be rude?"

My breath was caught in my throat. How was my real identity becoming a public knowledge? I never said I was one. I slipped my tongues sometimes, addressing people with Clan epithet like freebirth. But it happened mostly when I was in a rage, and nobody was supposed to take it seriously. Where did he get the information? Joey? Maxwell? Kyle Garret? Suddenly I felt vulnerable and exposed.

"You what?" Daniels blurted. "Are you a Clanner, Parker?"

"Look, I am not proud of this situation," I tried to get the heat off me. "But I am no longer a Clansman, nor do I feel like a Clansman. So please, regard me not as an ex-Clan mechwarrior, but as a Solaris mechwarrior. Whoever you heard this information from does not know the whole story."

"Then that's one thing I'll ask again in the future," the lady smiled. "Call me Fifi. Like I said, I have the power to restore your license, for one small compensation. Entertain me once; I'll reinstate your license. Entertain me twice; I'll put Daniels Stable back to where it belonged. Entertain me thrice; you'll fight in the semifinal. Blow me away, and you're the champion of heavy circuit. Remember, Parker, the higher your connection, the saver your position. And nobody is closer to the SGC than me."

This was the time when I supposed to ask 'what kind of entertainment', but I restrained. Fifi spoke in such an indirect metaphor that I was completely lost. Entertain – that was a dubious word. I was not an entertainer, and the only kind of entertainment I could provide was arena fight. If she liked blood and explosion, then she could watch me fighting. But still, I had my license revoked. Besides, I felt that she meant more than arena entertainment. Before I did something I would regret, I had better take the safe path.

"I am flattered by your offer, Madam Fifi, but I will have to pass," I bowed slightly. "I have no experience in entertaining somebody aside from fighting in the arena, and I am afraid I will only be a disappointment for you. Mister Daniels can do it. He is certainly more experienced than me."

"You don't need experience, Parker," Fifi said. "Just accompany me through the night. Dinner, walk along the river, talk about yourself. I find out that most mechwarriors like to talk about themselves. So talk. Don't tell me you haven't done this before, because I will have to call you a liar."

"I am profoundly sorry, but I will not do it."

"Well, I'm not used to rejection," she huffed, clearly furious. "But who am I kidding? You're not even one of us! Alright then, if you wish to dwell at the bottom of the food chain, then I can only wish you good luck. May you find whatever you're looking for."

"Madam Fifi, wait!" Daniels yowled like a girl. "I believe I can get everything straight." He grabbed my arm and dragged me away from Fifi, obviously did not want her to hear our conversation. "Goddamit Parker, that's the best offer we can get! You get to escort a regal lady and get your license back! Why in the name of Katrina Steiner did you refuse a bargain like this?"

"Bargain? What bargain?" I cringed. "She asked me to do something that I had never done before. There is no guarantee that the result will be satisfactory. I have not 'entertained' a woman the way she wanted me to 'entertain' her, and if she was not 'entertained', both of us would be in deeper trouble. I do not want to do this."

"Just regard her as a royal whore, Parker! And don't tell me you haven't had one!"

That felt like an arrow piercing my heart. The only woman I had been with – as long as I could remember – was Evee. How dare he desecrated Evee! My left hand involuntary crunched his neck, pinching the soft indent between his second and third neck bones. As he gurgled, my right arm flexed behind my ear, ready to bludgeon his face into gristle heap. His mouth gaped, his breath wheezed, and his eyes rolled toward the back of his head. I was milliseconds away from punishing him for what he said.

But then, I pitied him. He was consumed by greed. All his conduct focused on one thing and one thing only: money. No, killing him was not a solution. Leaving him without money was meaner than pounding his face. I released him, who quickly gasped for air. I turned around toward the ticket counter, fuming, "I am leaving for Atreus. Do not stop me."

"You promised," he croaked. "So you're just gonna go and forget what you said. Alright then, go! I hope you got your brain fixed, because now you're just a cheater and a liar! Damn trashborn! Just go back to Strana Mechty and shame your kind by breaking promises, you sonofabitch!"

I hated myself for staying here too long. The innocent promise to stay for another season had turned into complication that I expected the least. Had I ignored Daniels' offer to stay, none of this would have happened. It was a bad decision. Now I was stuck at Solaris because I put myself into a hole. Kyle was right. Without guidance, I was lost. And had Evee been here, I would not have been this miserable.

What now? Ask Kyle for assistance? No, it was better if I stayed away from the Davions.

I knew taking this offer was dangerous. But if Fifi spoke the truth, then I could go back to the arena within a week. I could finish my tenure for Daniels, thus fulfilling my promise within a year. Then I could finally leave for Atreus. If I passed it, I would be burdened by my promise for years until I could get my license back. Then I had to dedicate another year for Daniels. Perhaps it behooved me well if I took the offer.

"Fine, I will do it," I sighed in defeat. "Tell me what to do."

"Why don't we go to Valhalla Club to lube things up, hm?" she smiled.

Valhalla Club, Solaris VII,
Freedom Theater, Lyran Alliance,
May 19, 3066

"You're too quiet as a mechwarrior. Tell me, why did you leave the Clan?"

Valhalla Club was a first-rate club at Solaris City. The ambience was sultry, the food was excellent, and the customers were classy, although I caught some cynical stares from my neighbors once in a while. It was designed as a rendezvous haven of top-ranked warriors, where they could chat and brag about their arena accomplishments. A rather futile use, considering millions of c-bills that were spent on building the club.

Had I come alone, I would have been able to enjoy it more. Fifi's machine-gun questions took most of the enjoyment away. I did not understand why she wanted to know everything about my life. I could tell she was not interested in my life. Her eyes looked at someplace else instead of mine. But she could not stop talking, asking stupid questions that she could easily find the answer on the HPG network.

"Why are you doing this?" I could not stand her inquest anymore. "Why are you talking to me? You have a family. Why are you having dinner with me instead of them?"

"Wherever you learnt that concept of marriage, it's wrong," she leaned back, hinting a slight annoyance. "Marriage is nothing but an eminence. My dear husband's real wife is Solaris Games. He spends 20 hours a day building schedules. That leaves me his concubine, living in a world stained with gold and gem, but lacking the touch and the love of a man. So I find my own entertainment: the company of top-ranked mechwarriors. I built mutualism with my companies. I provide them arena security, they provide me entertainment."

"I may not understand the concept of marriage, but if it hurts you, why do you keep it?"

She broke into mirth. "Is that your reason to leave the Clan? Because it doesn't satisfy you?"

I shook my head. "You will not understand."

"When a man says 'it's too complicated', there's a woman involved. Do you have a girlfriend, Parker?"

Again, bittersweet memories of Evee stormed into my head. I started to despise this woman. She owned everything: a husband with stellar position in the society, bodyguards, money, fame; a great life that many people would kill to get it. But here she was, meddling with strangers, blaming her husband for her lack of flares. She inadvertently insulted me for not being able to get the only thing that mattered to me. No, I would not give her the honor to talk about Evee. I would not answer that question.

"If I had satisfied you, Ma'am, I wish to retire to my room," I asked for an excuse. "I have an early day."

"You barely entertain me," she replied. "The night is young. Why, afraid of your girlfriend?"

That was it. I could not tolerate her anymore. "You have been warned that I would only give you dissatisfaction. You chose to ignore me. So do not complain about my lack of entertainment! You can do whatever you wish with my license. I am leaving. Thank you for dinner."

I got up briskly and rushed to the door, but she went after me, tugging my shirt, then mashed her lips to mine. Her ferocity caught me off guard, and for a moment I could not do anything but to stand idle and weather everything she threw at me.

"I adore strong men," she whispered on my ear. "My husband is a sissy, and most Solaris mechwarriors are egomaniac slimes. Clanners are different. They're honorable and strong, and from what I heard, Clanners are – as many people put it eloquently – stallions."

Suddenly I saw what she had been referring to as 'entertainment'.

"Neg… no, I will not do it," I fluttered, feeling the rush of adrenaline surged into my vein.

"Well, my perception of Clanners as honorable warriors was clearly an overstatement," she stepped back, sporting disgust in her eyes. "You're just a bunch of wishy-washy critters cowering under the superiority of your battlemechs. You are nothing but strong men with weak minds. It disgusts me to just talk to you. However, Parker, I will still honor my commitment to accommodate you with your license. I will wait for you in my limousine. If you choose to be a small persona, then you're not worth my generosity."

I could motion for Trial of Grievance based on her insults alone. But a Clan trial against a middle-aged, delicate woman? She was smaller and thinner than Evee, and I could break her backbone with one hand only. I had no honor if I proceeded. But I could not let her get away with it. Who did she think she was, claiming that she was better than Clan mechwarriors? Was she not aware that I could summon a bitter punishment?

Yes, punishment. I would punish her for what she did to me.

I was tired and confused when I walked by the limousine and knocked on the window. My judgment was impaired with rage when she rolled the window down, smiling in victory. I never considered that my punishment was the entertainment that she had been waiting for. All I wanted to do was to humiliate her, to render her helpless, to show her that a Clan mechwarrior was superior to Solaris freebirth.

Little did I know, this would be the biggest mistake I would ever do.