Part One
Jerusalem, 1192
Chapter 2
Sometimes Guarding Your King is All It's Cracked Up to Be
Robin shifted his weight and pulled at the chain mail of his shirt. Sweat poured out from under his helmet; it was just past noon and Robin was drenched in sweat. Jesus, it was hot in this country. What exactly was so holy about this place again? It was brown, desolate and hot. If he were God he'd have picked somewhere greener and cooler to bless.
"Master, I have come to a very important decision." Much panted at Robin tugging at his own chain mail.
Robin's thoughts were broken as Much spoke. Looking up he saw that his friend and manservant looked just as miserable as he felt. "What decision is that, Much?"
"Let the Saracens keep the Holy Land. I think we have a translation error in the Bible. I have had a revelation from God and it has told me we made a very serious error. What the Bible was really meant to say is that Jesus was born in the town of Bethlehem – a little known hamlet of Switzerland – next to a lake with beautiful trees and cool green grass. That is our true Holy Lands. Let the Saracens have Jerusalem – let's go defend a nice lake in Switzerland."
Just as Robin was about to agree with Much that perhaps his revelations were a good idea; he heard a loud belly laugh behind him. Turning around both he and Much forgot joking, the heat and anything else as they hit their knees in front of King Richard.
"Milord," Much stammered. "Please forgive me, it is heat sickness." Why did he always have to open his mouth at the wrong times?
King Richard laughed even harder. Wiping the sweat from his face he flicked it at Much in good humor. "You're right it is heat sickness. We're all sick of this heat. Personally I am all in favor of your revelation oh great prophet Much but I don't think the Pope will be as welcoming of it. He is quite sure that the Bible means this particular Jerusalem." With that he smiled. King Richard thought of the young Earl of Huntington almost as a son; he was almost as fond of the boy's manservant Much.
"Well, if you're done with your revelations Much, I have a request for you and your Master. Robin, I am going to meet with Salahadin at his palace before he retires for his honeymoon. We have agreed to take one full month of peace for him to celebrate his marriage to his newest wife. I would like for you and Much to go as part of my guard."
Looking up from their place on their knees, Much and Robin nodded in assent. "Of course your Majesty."
Much stopped for just a second. "Wait, your Majesty. Newest wife, sir? I thought Salahadin already had a wife."
"He does, Much. His primary wife still resides in Medina. I am given to understand that he has several wives, some political other not. I have been told that this young lady in particular falls into the not category." King Richard smiled; they really were good young men. He'd let them guard the garden perimeter. They'd get to see the beautiful gardens Salahadin had cultivated and give them an eyeful of Salahadin's harem. It was one of King Richard's guilty pleasures and these were young men who hadn't seen beautiful women in a very long time. "Good we'll leave around 4 and I expect the meeting to take most of the night. So when your relief gets here please get some sleep and for heaven's sake take a bath. Both of you men stink like pigs. I can't take you into a palace smelling like a barnyard.