It's the last day of school, and I've finished everything I need to, no summer school for me. And now I can stop taking those pills, Mariana only gave me enough for a week so I had to get more somewhere else, there was this girl Kelsey who gave me something similar for really cheap. I just used my lunch money from Stef and Lena. The pills were way better too, I went like three nights without sleeping. It was great for helping me study for Math. But now that I've stopped taking them, I feel the withdrawals starting, it's nothing I can't handle, I just feel a little dizzy and I'm having hot and cold flushes, but I can go home and go straight to bed after school, then next week I start work at the diner.

Lena insists we all have a special dinner to celebrate the last day of school, so I can't just sleep until the morning. Mariana and I both sit sluggishly at the dining room table with our eyes half open. Everyone else is full of energy and toasting to the last day and a great a summer and all that crap. I just need to sleep for like five years, then I'll be fine.

"So we were thinking about a vacation this summer, that sound good to you guys?" Lena asks.

"Awesome, where?" Jesus says.

"I don't know, maybe skiing?"

"Skiing? In summer? Isn't that something you do in winter?" Callie asks.

"Not necessarily, we could go up to Big Bear, it's not too far, we could drive there," The others all cheer away but Mariana and I are falling asleep.

"Mariana, Cressida, you okay with that?" Stef asks.

"Huh? Oh yeah, you guys have fun," I say.

"You're coming too," Callie says, "Right moms?"

"Of course, you're part of the family!" Lena says, "Mariana, you up for it?"

"Whatever,"

"Alright what's going on with you two? You've been bouncing off the walls the last two weeks,"

"I guess everything's just catching up to us,"

"Well alright, just try and get a good sleep tonight, love," Stef says, "There was something we wanted to ask you,"

"Can it wait until later? I'm exhausted, can I be excused?" I get up.

"Sure sweetie," Lena says, "You don't look so good," I ignore her and walk to the stairs, but I only make it half way before I get really dizzy, "Cressida?" Her words start to sound like mumbles. I feel my legs give way beneath me before it all goes dark.

"The doctor said there are drugs in her system, how did this happen?"

"I don't know, I thought we had a close eye on her,"

"You don't think this has something to do with Mariana, do you? She looked just as bad as Cressida did,"

"Maybe, I'm not sure, I don't want to jump to conclusions,"

"Hello?" I say sitting up. I'm back in hospital with Stef and Lena either side of me.

"Oh thank God, Cressida," Lena takes my hand, "What were you thinking? You scared us to death!" She hugs me.

"What happened?"

"You passed out," It all comes back to me, "It was caused by withdrawals, what were you doing taking drugs?" Stef raises her voice.

"Stef not now, don't you think she's been punished enough,"

"I don't know, I just... I'm at the end of my tether," She leaves in a huff.

"She's just worried, and in shock," Lena sits on my bed and strokes my face, "Why would you do something so silly?" She has sorrow in her eyes, "I'm not mad, I just want to understand,"

"I'm sorry, I know it was dumb but I just wanted to do well in school and there weren't enough hours in the day, I'm so sorry Lena," She hugs me, "Are you gonna send me back to Juvie? I understand if you want to, what I did was awful," I whimper.

"Send you back? Of course not, no,"

"So I guess I'm going to another group home," I wipe my tears away, I brought this on myself.

"No, Cressida, you're not going anywhere except back home with us," I look up at her in shock.

"You're not kicking me out? After what I did? Why would you let me stay?"

"Listen, Cressida, when Callie first got here she was a lot like you, she made some mistakes and when she did, she assumed we would give up on her, but like Callie you are not disposable, we want to take care of you until you learn to take care of yourself. Yes you made a really stupid mistake and you will face the consequences, but that doesn't involve you leaving us, okay?"

"Okay, yeah," I smile at her. I really feel a connection to Lena especially, she understands me. A doctor comes into my room with Stef.

"Hi, Cressida, glad to see you're awake," He says, Stef and Lena hold hands.

"Am I gonna be okay?" I ask him.

"Yes, you are, you're a very lucky young lady, but we do need to ask a few questions,"

"Why? We don't need to get the police involved do we?" Lena asks.

"No, but we need to know for the record, for billing and things like that," I hadn't even thought about the bills, I don't have insurance, Stef and Lena will be the ones paying for all of this, "Where did you get the drugs?" I can't tell him it was Mariana, not in front of Stef and Lena, I can't tell him at all because they would find out eventually.

"Cressida, tell him the truth," Stef folds her arms.

"I can't," I twiddle my thumbs.

"This is very serious, Cress, if you're protecting someone you could get in a lot more trouble than you already are," Lena sits right next to me.

"I can't, Lena," She takes one real look at me and she understands.

"Okay, we'll have to figure this out at home," She tells the doctor, he looks pretty pissed but he just nods and leaves.

"Lena, can I talk to you outside for a second," Stef says. They both get up and shut the door after them. I can see them through the window but I can't hear anything. They must be certain it was Mariana, but I'm not gonna throw her under the bus. So I get up and I go out to talk to them, "Cressida, what are you doing, get back into bed," She puts her arms around me, "You need rest,"

"No one gave them to me," I lie.

"What?"

"I stole them, I found them in the basket, in the kitchen, I think they were Jesus' ADHD pills," The two of them sigh and look at each other.

I'm discharged from the hospital the next day, I thought for sure after telling them I stole the pills they would kick me out, but no, they're just really mad at me.

"Mariana, get down here now," Stef yells up the stairs the second we get home.

"Stef, don't do this now, Cressida just got home," Stef ignores her wife.

"What's going on?" Mariana asks as she nervously walks down the stairs, she knows her mom's mad voice.

"Cressida, wait in the living room please," She says to me, she won't look either of us in the eye. Mariana looks at me for an explanation. Even though I didn't tell them it was her I know she'll be mad at me.

I sit in silence trying to hear them talking in the yard but I can't hear a damned thing, so I sneak into the kitchen and bend down by the sink.

"Mariana, we know you gave her the drugs, how would she even know where we keep them?" They don't sound mad, they sound worried.

"Are you using again?" Lena says with her soft voice.

"No," There's a silence, "Yes, but I've stopped now, it was just for school, I swear, I only gave her few I promise, I don't know where she got the rest,"

"Why would you do that Mariana? You know she has a history with drugs,"

"She told me she'd only ever sold, I didn't know she would become so dependent, we both stopped at the same time but I guess she just had worse withdrawals than me, I'm really sorry and you can ground me for as long as you want,"

"You bet your ass we can," I stand up and go outside.

"Me too, I'm really sorry,"

"Mariana you can go," She walks past me, she looks apologetic now, "Where did you get the other drugs, they were a lot stronger than what Mariana gave you, they could have left permanent damage to you,"

"It was a girl at school, Kelsey, I've never spoken to her before but I guess she saw me taking something and offered to sell to me, again, I'm so so sorry,"

"Go tell Mariana you're both grounded for 2 weeks, no TV, nothing, go on,"

I walk out hanging my head in shame, I came out of this whole thing pretty lucky, if this happened in any other home I'd get the shit kicked out of me. Now I just have to redeem myself and prove that I can be responsible and not make stupid mistakes.