Chapter Twenty-Eight: Of Guilt and Bonds
A/n: Wow! Thanks to everyone who has given this story such attention! You all are wonderful, and I'm so sorry for the late posting! But thanks to everyone whose given this story attention! Happy readings!
"Alright. Someone really needs to go see where the hell Tian is at. She's been gone all day." Yun stated, starting to let his worry show through. Not to say he hasn't been worried all day, because he has, but he didn't care about letting it not show. Not when a companion was in danger, and she had been missing all day.
"She'll turn up as usual. I'm sure she's fine." Hak stated, looking towards the forest. He was worried, but he wanted to hold on to the hope that Tian was safe, and that there would be no need to fight. That being said, he would give it only ten more minuets before personally looking himself.
"Yeah, but it's not really like her to be gone without notifying anyone." Yun shot back, eyebrows drawing together. Hak and Yun shared a look before Hak broke it by looking at the trees, practically counting the seconds before he'd go and look for the dark haired girl himself.
"Maybe she went into town." Yona stated, smiling slightly.
She was worried all day, but was holding it back. She didn't want to worry anyone else further, and besides, she was holding on to the hope that she would be ok. She glanced at Hak, noting the worried expression, and bit her lips as she looked at the rest of the group, wanting to hear their opoions before deciding on a course of action.
"I doubt she did. She wouldn't want to put any of them in danger." Jae-Ha stated, his tone a bit clipped. His arms were crossed over his chest. He was just itching to scour the entire place to find her.
"Maybe she's out practicing something." Kija stated. He too was worried, but was trying to suppress it as well. Although some of his own fear leaked into his tone, which made it sound a bit squeaky.
They had been doing that very same thing all day. All of them were worried, but clung to the hope that she was alright. No matter how minuet the true possibility of her being safe and well was, they all wanted to cling to it. None of them wanted to think of anything bad happening to her, so they tried to bat away those thoughts.
Indeed, it wasn't but a few minuets after Kija said that statement that Tian showed. She walked slowly, pausing as she leaned up against a tree.
"Tian!" Yona shouted, smiling widely as she hugged Tian tightly.
"We're happy to see you're alright little miss!" Zeno called out, also hugging her. Tian smiled, looking a bit uncomfortable, but nodded anyways.
"Y-yeah. Ca-can you guys let go? C-can't breath." Tian stuttered, laughing slightly as the two let go of her. Tian looked around, smiling slightly.
"What were you doing? Your clothes are torn." Yun stated, looking at Tian. Now that it was brought up, Tian blushed slightly, and got a guarded expression as everyone examined her.
Other than her clothes being torn slightly, mostly around the hemlines, and her clothes being really dirty, as if she had spent the entire day rolling in mud and dirt, she looked realtivly clean. There was a bandaged wrapped around her hand, and over her forehead, although she tried to hid it with her hair. She also had a black eye, and she seemed to be keep weight off her left leg.
"You got into a fight, didn't you?" Hak stated, looking directly into Tian's eyes. Tian felt flustered under his unwavering gaze. She didn't know how to respond, and just shrugged slightly.
"It was nothing. Just a couple of thugs wanting to pick a fight, but I'm alright. You really should see the other guy." Tian laughed slightly, shaking her head.
"You idiot. Come here, and let's see how bad those injuries of yours are." Yun said, turning as he walked back to the tent. Tian paused for a moment, and then followed after the boy.
"Seriously, was this really just a fight between some thugs. Looks like it got pretty ugly." Yun stated, as he was moving her ankle around, checking to see if there was anything wrong with it. From Tian's wince, he knew something was wrong. Most likely, it was probably twisted.
"It was nothing." Tian stated, once again getting a guarded expression. Yun looked at her with a penetrative expression. He knew she was lying.
"You could have sent some sort of signal if it was this much trouble. I have a hard time believing a couple of thugs did this much damage." Yun wasn't sure what he wanted to hear, but he didn't appericate being lied to either.
"I didn't want to put you guys in any sort of danger." Tian stated. Yun looked at her with a slight scowl.
"So... It there was more to the story." He stated simply. Tian looked at him, keeping the stare for a few moments, before looking away with a sigh."You realize that we need any information as well for our own safety. We're risking alot by doing any of this."
"I... I know, and I do appericate it. Like I said, I don't want to put you guys in any sort of danger, and-"
"And by not giving a full story, you could be putting us in danger." Yun interrupted, wrapping a bandage around her ankle. He then sighed." Look, just tell me one thing... Do we have to worry about these guys coming back, and looking for round two?" Yun's blue eyes looked directly at Tian's face, who once again looked away with a pensive expression.
"No. I killed them..." Her voice trailed off. The weight of her words clung to the air around Yun and her. Yun stared at her, not sure what else to do, and then looked away with a slight nod of his head.
"Oh..." He didn't know what else to say. What can one say after someone admits to somehow like that anyways?
"It was the only way to end it." She stated as if pleading before a court. Yun nodded, not saying anything further as he continued to treat her wounds.
"Well... At least she's alright." Hak stated, sitting next to a still silent Jae-Ha, who was looking at the trees with his arms crossed, and a scowl on his face.
"Yes." Jae-Ha said with a slight smile, his face relaxing. Hak watched him for a moment longer, and then looked away as Yun came out with a pensive expression. Jae-Ha and Hak stood up, and walked over to the teen.
Yun looked up at them, his face relaxing slightly.
"She's alright. She'll just need to take it easy for now." Yun said, glancing back at the tent, and then forward once again.
"Would it be alright to go in, and speak to her?" Jae-Ha questioned. Yun looked at the green haired man for a moment, and then nodded as he stepped aside. Jae-Ha paused for a moment, and then walked in. Hak paused, glancing at Yun.
"Is everything really alright?" Hak questioned to the spaced out Yun. Yun glanced at Hak, and then nodded.
"Yeah. I'm gonna start on dinner now." It was obvious to Hak that Yun was not willing to talk about something, which worried Hak about what could have happened, but didn't comment as he let Yun go. Hak took one last glance at the tent, and then walked away to give the two privacy.
As Jae-Ha felt the tent flap close behind him, and Hak walk away, Jae-Ha looked around the tent, and then at Tian. His felt his muscles tense up as he saw her with bandages wrapped around her head, right hand, and her left arm in a make-shift sling. She was also wrapped in a blanket with her left ankle prompted up on a series of clothes held up by sticks.
She had a blackened eye, and her face looked a bit swollen. She had the same expression on her face that Yun had on his face coming out. She looked up at Jae-Ha, her grim expression seemed to dour for a moment before relaxing. If only slightly.
"Seems those thugs did a number on you." Jae-Ha joked, walking closer to her, and then sat next to her. Tian glanced at him, nodding as she looked off, her face turning grave once again. Jae-Ha dropped his playful expression, and touched her shoulder ever so lightly. He could tell it still pained her, if the slight flinching was any indicator. He immedtaly dropped his hand, his lips pursing for a moment before relaxing his face. "What's on your mind?" Jae-Ha asked, but Tian didn't seem to hear him for a moment.
"Yun didn't seem happy when he walked out." She commented softly, her hands balling up into a fist. Jae-Ha paused, not sure how to respond, and then smiled slightly.
"He's probably just worried." Jae-Ha said softly. He wanted to comfort her, but wasn't sure how to go about it.
There was obviously something she needed to talk about, but he wasn't going to pry if she wasn't willing to give out more information. Her eyes glazed over, going to another place entirely, for just the briefest of moments before she seemed to comeback to the present.
"Yeah. Worried." She said, looking at Jae-Ha with a slight smile." How are you?" She questioned, tilting her head slightly. Jae-Ha was taken off guard, not sure how to reply.
"I'm... Alright. How about you?" He asked, grinning as he touched her free hand. She looked at his hand on top of hers, and then at his face. A pensive expression once again crossed her face before she looked off with a slight smile.
"I'm... Ok." She answered after a moment, looking back at him with a smile.
"That's good. I'm glad you're ok." Jae-Ha looked at her once more.
It still pained him that she wound up like this, in this condition, and there was nothing that he could have done to stop it. He should have pushed harder to go look for her. He could have gone off on his own to look for her. Maybe she wouldn't be in this sorry state if he hadn't held back.
"Don't look like that." She said, touching his face with her other hand. Jae-Ha glanced at her make-shift cast, and then at her face. Her eyes shone with an emotion he couldn't place, but her lips were in a softened, almost saddened smile."I'm the dumbass who went off on my own." She added on when his expression didn't change.
"I'm the dumbass who didn't go out to look for you when I knew something was wrong. What really happened, Tian?" Jae-Ha questioned, his anger seeping out just slightly in his tone.
Tian pulled back, seemingly going into herself once more, which was the opposite of what Jae-Ha wanted. He softened his expression, reaching out, and caressing her hair for a moment, and then resting his hand on her shoulder ever so slightly. Tian blushed, and looked away out of embarrassment.
"I really don't want to talk about it." She stated softly, which worried Jae-Ha more.
Did those bastards do something to her that she wasn't willing to talk about? If that was the case, he could only imagine what they did, and all those things just angered him more, but he kept it under control.
"Did-"
"If it's alright, I just want to be alone right now." She smiled at Jae-Ha, who simply looked at her a moment longer, and then nodded, standing up.
"I'll see you later then, alright?" He looked at her just a moment longer. Tian nodded, quickly dropping her smile as she looked away with a more grim, pensive expression. Jae-Ha looked at her a moment longer, and then nodded as he walked out of the tent.
"Hey, is Tian alright? Yun is being pretty quiet about it all." Jae-Ha felt surprised to see Yona and Kija standing before him. He looked back at the tent, and then at the two before him with a slight smile.
"She's alright. She's just resting now." He said. Yona looked at the tent, and then at Jae-Ha."She wants to be alone, Yona Dear, let's have her have that much." He looked at Kija, who was nodding as he seemed to understand what was going on, or at least reading the atmosphere. Jae-Ha touched Yona's shoulder gently, and lead her away from the tent. Yona couldn't resist giving a worried expression towards the tent one last time before walking away.
Tian couldn't get those moments out of her mind. The last moments of the fight. It played over and over in her mind like a moving picture. A moving picture that was impossible to ignore, and a moment she could never again erase. It was an either them or her. She had no choice. She had to kill them, but that moment refused to leave her mind.
The gasp of their last breaths leaving their bodies. The fabric of the clothes ripping as she stabbed them in the chest. The crunch of bone as it gave way to the blade. The blood that dripped on to her clothes, her bare skin. The life leaving their eyes, and the sound of their bodies slamming against the ground. She would never forget the weight of their bodies against hers as she moved them, and dug shallow graves. The feeling of dirt under her nails. The sweat dripping down her skin. The pain in her body. All of that was forever ingrained in her mind.
Sure, Tian was used to fighting. She had to fight to live sometimes when others picked a fight, but she never killed. That was a step she was never willing to take.
Even more, Tian didn't want to deal with the after affects. Yun seemed unresponsive to her after the fact, which panicked Tian. Surely the group had been in life and death situations before? Why did he become unresponsive towards her?
That's when she felt a bit anger rise up in her. Yun had no right to judge her, if that was the case, but then her anger disappeared as quickly as it appeared, and all that was left was the guilt. She had broken the one thing she said she wouldn't do, and she hated herself for it.
That's when what Min-Soo had suggested to her had started to make sense. This was Tian's mess. This was all Tian's fault. If it wasn't for her nature, none of this would have happened. None of it at all, and everyone would still be safe and sound.
In Tian's mind, it made sense to take off. It wasn't like she wasn't used to traveling anyways. She was perfectly used to taking off on her own. It wouldn't be that hard. Only this time... She had someone... Some people that she didn't want to separate from again.
For the first time, she had a real bond, and she didn't want to break it, but... Could she really stay, and continue to put them in danger? Could she live with herself if one of them got hurt? Or even killed?
Tian's sighed, looking away as she leaned her head back down the ground, and squeezed her eyes shut. No. She couldn't bear the thought of any of them getting hurt or even killed. But she couldn't stand the thought of leaving either.
"Tian?" Yona asked softly, coming into the tent.
Tian lifted her head, looking to see just about everyone else in the tent right behind Yona. Tian blinked her eyes fast to stop the tears from over flowing from her eyes.
"Looks like they did a number on you. Heh, tell me they're worse off." Hak teased, smirking slightly.
"You should tell us where they went off to so we can finish the job." Kija said, fists curling up.
"It really is a shame to trash such a beautiful face." Jae-Ha said with a flirty tone.
"Now, now guys there's no need to kill anyone. I'm sure the little miss gave them a good enough scare." Zeno said with a cheery smile.
"We're all happy you're ok." Yona said with a smile.
"Dinner's ready. You should eat if you want the strength to heal." Yun said, pushing a bowl towards Tian.
Tian took the bowl in a robotic motion, but didn't bother eating. She just looked down at the steaming pile of rice for a moment, and then looked up with a soft smile.
"Thank you." She said softly, feeling her chest well up while her stomach dropped like a boulder. She just didn't know what she was going to do.