Written for 'The FRIENDS Competition' - TOW The Blackout (write anything using the prompt 'darkness')
Written for the 'Can You Make It To The End' challenge - write a drabble under 500 words about Regulus Black
Emotion/Feeling - Overwhelmed
Pairing - None
Rating - T (Warnings for self-harm)
Word Count - 469
The Dark Mark
He stands in front of the mirror and stares at his own reflection, but the person he sees in the mirror is unrecognisable. He sees a seventeen-year old boy – he is not a man, men are supposed to be strong and he is anything but. He sees dishevelled black hair that looks as though it has never been brushed. He sees dark circles under his tired grey eyes, and as he stares into those eyes all he can see is his own self-loathing.
He feels overwhelmed by darkness. No matter where he turns, his conscience is plagued with guilt and anxiety and fear. He has made a huge mistake. His need to impress his family has made him forget who he is.
He used to blame Sirius. After Sirius abandoned him and left him to take on the responsibility of being heir to the Most Noble and Ancient House of Black, he did everything he did to spite Sirius. But this… this is all on Regulus.
He can't blame anybody but himself. He lifts his left arm up and stares at the Dark Mark for a long time. He hates it. He hates the things it has made him do. He's hurt people. He's killed people. All for what? To make his family proud of him? His parents can't be more thrilled that he's joined the Dark Lord. But Regulus can't be any less disappointed in himself.
He deserves pain for what he's done. He deserves to hurt, like he's hurt others. The need to hurt himself is overwhelming, and in one swift movement he's smashed the mirror in front of him. Pain shoots through his fist from where it's made contact with the mirror.
He grabs a particularly sharp piece of glass in his right hand and shakily moves it to his left forearm. He presses the pointed end against his pale skin till he draws blood. He is crying but he doesn't care. He deserves this. He drags the shard of glass down his arm, slicing it open and watching as the blood runs down the sides and drips onto the floor.
He hesitates as the glass reaches the Dark Mark, but then continues dragging it across his skin. He doesn't want to see the thing that resembles every bit of darkness in his life. But after he's done, he can still see the Dark Mark. He wants it gone. He takes the shard of glass and goes over it again, and again, and again. He cuts into his skin until all he can see is a mangled, bloody mess and no sign that the Dark Mark had ever been there.
He knows it will become visible again, but for now he can relax. For now, he can be at peace. At least for a little while.
xXx