Chapter 9
I felt weightless, light. Like, super light. That's when I realize I'm floating, but I can't see anything. Just darkness. I feel like I'm being pulled to the surface of a body of water, leaving whatever is at the bottom behind. The pulling sensation slowly fades to stop, then a sudden bright flash overwhelms my senses. I suddenly feel like I'm falling again, only this time I'm not panicking. I just spread my non-existent arms and just let myself fall. Just as soon as it started, the falling sensation stops. I still can't see, I think I may be blind. All I see is white, nothing else. A faint beeping starts somewhere, I don't know where. It gets progressively louder until it sounds like its right next to me. My eyes finally take the liberty to refocus. That's when I realize I'm in a hospital bed…again.
I look around the white room, trying to get a grip on what happened. I can't remember what happened that made me wound up here. I attempt to get up, but my legs feel incredibly weak. I grip on the IV dispenser for support and slowly make my way out the door. I immediately notice there's no one around, no doctors, no nurses, no patients, nothing. I try calling out, but it seems like I forgot to unmute myself. My voice wouldn't work, not a sound is leaving my throat. I wander down the hallway trying to see if I can find someone. I turn the corner and I see a man in a white coat writing something on his clipboard.
The man looks up and smiles at me, as if he was expecting me. He was incredibly handsome, similar to an actor. His face looked like it was chiseled by the traveler himself. If there's a reason why no guardian is perfect, it's because the Traveler gave all the beauty points to this guy. "Jason, correct?" he says finally. I simply nod because I still can't speak. "It's good to finally meet you. I've seen your work, and might I say I am very impressed." His voice was deep and smooth, extremely alluring. Like he can read one of the cryptarch's boring reports and I'd listen to them with no protest. Wait- my work? As a guardian? How does he know? Who is he? "I always want to meet you guardians, but my condition basically denies me the power to. What I'm doing now is all I'm capable of." He can't be…there's no way. I raise my finger at him in awe and just smiles, "Yes yes, I am your dear Traveler."
"Thank goodness this happen to you, no offense however. Your current state allows me to intercept your conscious and talk to you." My state? What does he mean? "You may not remember, but you're on the verge of death at the moment." Death? No.. no way. All my friends, everyone. I let go of the IV dispenser and drop to the floor, tears start to welt on my eye lids. " Take it easy, Jason. You will live, I ensure it. Besides, you have too much left to do on earth as a guardian to die now. It is simply not your time." He holds out his hand to help me up. Upon grabbing it, I feel a rush of energy. My legs suddenly feel strong again. "Listen to me Jason. You are doing a perfect job as a guardian out there." I give a confident smile, it's not every day you get complimented by god himself. "However," my smile washes away, "you are not doing so well as a person. You are putting your duty in front of your humanity. Sacrificing your friends for a mission accomplish. While yes you are worrying about them by putting yourself in the line of fire, it is still selfish by the end of the day. Your friends get hurt seeing you hurt. And almost killing yourself twice certainly doesn't help. Harming yourself to bring relief to those around you is not true. Care for your friends and they will care for you. Don't put the blame on yourself and carry the responsibilities alone, Jason. Nothing good comes from self harm."
Tears start streaming from my eyes. He's right. My sense of duty is putting my life on the line. The day I finally die from that will hurt my friends more than any bullet would. My death would not only affect me, but those around me. Putting myself in danger is selfish and cruel to myself and my friends. "Now," I look up at him "our time is almost up. It was good finally meeting you Jason. Hopefully you take my words to heart." I feel myself start to lean back, eventually into another freefall. I hear the beeping again. It sounds like it's trying to catch up to me. As the beeping gets louder, the wind in my ears fades until eventually I'm looking at the ceiling. The beeping reduces to a constant, steady pace. I try moving but my body feels incredibly sore. I look around the room and I still see nobody. I let out a groan to try to sit up, but fail miserably. At least my voice works now, can't say the same for everything else. A nurse walks in checking her board, "Hey nurse, can I get something to drink, I'm quite parched."
She got me a soda, which is good enough. I just sat alone drinking my cola, thinking about what the traveler said. Was it really him or was I hallucinating from my near death experience? Either way, he was right. I need to change, I need to start worrying about my friends, cause they clearly worry about me. I take another sip of my soda. I feel a mood of fear and rage closing in. I take another sip. There can only be one person who would want to kill me and hug me at the same time right now. I sip one more time. She bursts through the door, her eyes puffy and red from crying, but maybe also from anger. She stomps over to me, looking like she's ready to strangle me. I struggle to raise my hands to calm her down, "Hey Leslie, there's no need to - " She throws her arms around my neck and pulls herself towards me, sitting down at my bedside "You idiot, you big idiot." Her eyes start to water. I smile and put my left arm on her back. "You'd really think I'd break our promise?" She just doesn't say anything and just sit there. Well since I almost died – again – I might as well let her sit here as long as she wants.
We sat there for a good while. Neither of us said anything. With the silence being long overdrawn, I speak up, "Hey Leslie, how are you feeling?" Without moving, she responds, "This is the second time you almost died, right in front of me I may add. How do you think I'm feeling?" I chuckle, "Fair enough." Suddenly I hear from the door, "Am I intruding yet again?" Leslie jumps and we both turn to the door. Alex is leaning against the frame with a smug smile. "Don't worry, I won't say anything about this. I promise." Leslie turns away, probably blushing. "Anyway, I'm glad you're alive Jason. That Titan armor doesn't mess around on it protective capabilities huh? You survived solely because of your armor breaking your fall. No way a Hunter or Warlock could survive that." I laugh, "What can I say? I'm a stubborn Titan who's hard to kill."
The doctor walks in past Alex, "Boy are you Titans difficult to incapacitate. You'll make a full recovery, however, I'm going to ask for you to avoid grueling mission s for a few days while your light recovers from the blow and starts the adaptive healing. Until then, you're going to be sore for a while." I smile, "Thanks Doc, keep up the good work." He nods and replies, "Thank you. And with that you are free to leave. Take care." And with that he walks out. Alex hands me a bag with a change of clothes. Leslie takes off before us, heading home. I take my time in changing because of my body aching so much. Soon, we leave the hospital and catch the osprey back to the tower. The warm evening sun washes my body with sunlight. Cool air rushes my senses, invigorating me with the power of nature. "Ah, I can't get enough of this feeling." I say to myself. Alex smiles, "Yeah man, I know what you mean." We continue walking to the station, talking all the way there. I don't mention my near-death encounter with Alex or Leslie. I want to change on my own, and hopefully then everyone will notice it slowly.
We finally get back to my dorm after a while. I turn to Alex, "Hey, since its dinner time, want to stay? My treat." He grins with excitement, "Alright!" I open the door and instantly my face is hit with the smell of cooked chicken. Both Alex and I are dumbfounded. We look in the kitchen and see Leslie making dinner. "Um, Leslie? What are you doing?" I ask. She turns to us and smiles, "Well obviously I'm making dinner. Just finished actually. Here you go, enjoy!" She puts two plates on the table. We approach the plates and immediately notice what it is. "Rice bowls? You made this?" I ask. She puts sauce on the table and nods. "I could always cook, but since you did all the cooking I never got the chance to. Think of this as a small thank you for everything." I look at the food and my stomach instantly starts growling. Alex laughs, "Alright, no point in letting this food go to waste. Let's dig in!" I nod in agreement. The evening was filled with laughter, chatter, and the smell of food. I guess this is something I'd miss if I threw my life away. There's no way I'd miss this. Not if I have a say in it.
Alex leaves shortly after dinner, satisfied with his meal. I start washing the dishes and Leslie cleans up the table. She puts away the half-consumed whiskey bottle back in the alcohol pantry. "Hey Jason, I need to tell you something." Her words are slurred and long, she might have had too much to drink. I simply drank enough so my pain went away, even if temporarily. She gives me a hug from behind, "Please don't die again. I can fight for myself. If I die, then I die. I know you can't always be there to rescue me, so I need to get stronger." She holds me tighter, pressing herself closer to my back. "Besides," she whispers into my ear, "There's still plenty we have yet to do as roommates." I quickly turn around and put my hand on her head, holding her head, "Yeah I may be drunk, but I don't think so." She gives a disappointed look, "Ah Jason you're so cold-hearted."
Some time passes and Leslie eventually passes out on the couch, probably for the best. I leave a glass of water on the table next to the couch. I retire to my bed, still incredibly sore and the alcohol taking it's toll on my battered body. I lie in bed and stare at the ceiling. Starting tomorrow, I'm going to change. No longer will I act selfish. I will transform for the better. My eyelids slowly close and I eventually knock out after being tired from being dead.