I have a Tumblr, apparently. I decided I'm going to start posting these there, as well so if you have Tumblr, find me. type in tumblr dot com then add /blog/rainshade-the-wolf. Hope it works. This story will be on there.

'How,' Dipper Pines wonders, 'Do I always end up in these situations?'

He was sitting in an discreet cafe. It was really a nice cafe. A nice day, too for that matter. The sky was a clear winter blue, and the sun was shining. The air wasn't really cold, but their was a faint chill in the air. The waitress had been nice, and the coffee was good, warm. The croissants were warm and flaky. All in all, it was a wonderful way to start the day.

If it weren't for one thing.

"See 'im, Pine Tree? Over my left shoulder. Red cap, gray jacket."

Bill Cipher, his partner.

"Yes, I can see him. Just as I could see him 3 minutes ago, and 4 minutes before that."

Dipper sighed. Sitting across from him, in casual clothing (a yellow cardigan over a longsleeved black shirt) was the bane of his existence.

"Well fine! If you don't want to talk about the subject of our undercover mission, then shall we talk about ourselves? My name is Bill Cipher, I'm 26 next October, my favorite colour is yellow, and my hair is naturally this blonde." He smirked. "Your turn, Pine Tree."

Dipper sighed. "My name is Dipper Pines, I turned 24 in August. My favourite colour is green, and, uh, my twin sister, Mabel, insists on cutting my hair."

Bill grinned. "Do you speak any other languages? I know a bit of Spanish, but that's it."

Dipper paused. "Um, yeah. I know Russian, German, Japanese, Spanish, French, and, um, one I always forget the name of." He ticks off on his fingers. Bill has one eyebrow raised.

"Wow, impressive!"

"And I can swear in Cantonese."

Bill cracks a smile. They became partners back in March, and he was only now getting the brunette to open up to him.

"Target on the move. Come on, Cipher."

'And we're back to professionals.' Standing up casually, Bill and Dipper head towards the counter to pay for the coffee and croissants. The bell above the door jingles on their way out. Dipper has a heavy overcoat on, hiding his gun. Bill has a lighter jacket on that disguises his as well.

They caught up quickly. "Hello. Marcus?"

"Yes?"

"We would like to know where you were August 2, at 2:30 pm?"

"I-uh.. um.." The man stutters, then shoves Dipper before taking off. Dipper catches his balance before hitting the ground, and takes off after the man.

"What are you waiting for, Cipher? Catch him!" He calls over his shoulder. Bill takes off, but can't seem to catch up to Dipper. 'I never realized he was this fast..'

Dipper saw the opportunity, and took it. Sprinting, then lunging forward, tackling the man. Ripping his arms out from under him, Dipper locks them in the cuffs.

Bill catches up, huffing slightly.

"Buena captura... socio." He huffs out.

"De Verdad? ¿Ahora mismo?" Dipper grinds out, still sitting on top of the struggling suspect. "Stop moving, or I will stop you moving!" He hisses down at the man, who freezes.

Later, at the station, Bill tips in his chair as Dipper texted his sister.

"Hey, uh, this... wasn't us bonding, right?" Dipper asks casually.

"Oh, heavens no."

"Good."

Not fluently, but I know a bit of all the languages mentioned here.