Oh nuts! I forgot a disclaimer! Gee, can't you tell it's been ages since I've written anything?

Disclaimer: I don't own anything regarding Beyblade, save for an old version of Dranzer, an engine gear Wolborg and a Black Dranzer. Those, of course were bought at Wal-Mart.

Warning: Yeah, there's profanity, homosexuality, the whole enchilada.

To those of you who gave me the definition. You all gave me the same one xD It's from wikipedia isn't it?

Try Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis.

Tis a lung condition caused by breathing in silica from volcanoes D

Severe Companionship

Sexual Frustration Anyone?

The three Russians - technically, two Russians and one Russian-Japanese - stared incredulously at Rei's wardrobe. Actually, it was basically a somewhat rectangular hole in the wall with a pole running across that looked suspiciously like a broomstick to house coat hangers. Hung up on said coat hangers was an assortment of old, ratty and much too small clothes. The Nekojin's rickety dresser wasn't much better. Just about th eonly thing new that fitted in there was his dwindling array of boxers and underwear.

Kai pinched the bridge of his nose, Rei flushing bright red. "O-kay. This is worse than I thought. The only thing different from living as a hobo is that you actually have a roof."

Rei hung his head, red-faced and completely embarrassed. "I didn't think it was that bad."

Tala slung an arm around the Chinese' shoulder and hugged him, "Don't worry about it! We'll take care of it!" The redhead touseled Rei's ebon' hair before detatching to sort through all the clothing.

"Ew… ew… where's this from? The first world championships?" Tala tossed the rejected clothing, which was pretty much all of it, around the room.

After observing the whirlwind of tattered clothing his former teammate was causing, Kai turned to Rei, "You don't even have anything decent to wear today, do you?" The tone of his voice suggested that it wasn't a question but a statement. "We're taking you shopping, but first," The slate-haired male tugged on Tala's shirt before pulling it over his head - much to its owner's protest. The black t-shirt was tossed to Rei. "Put that on. The pants can stay but lose everything else."

Tala frowned and crossed his arms over his chest. It just so happened that he'd been wearing a muscle shirt beneath the t-shirt. Rei did as he was told, and slipped the leather vest off, and then the fishnet. The three older men allowed their eyes to wander over the exposed flesh until it was obscured by the offered clothing.

Bryan clapped his hands together once and made a sort of announcing sigh, "Alright, then. Can we get going?"

"Go where?" The raven-haired bartender queried, suddenly suspicious. "Don't leave me hanging."

"We're taking you shopping."

---

"You can't wear those pants," Tala warned as Rei stepped out of the change room, shirtless with a pair of form-fitting acid-washed jeans.

"Why?"

"If you get a hard-on, everyone will see it."

"If I get a hard-on wearing any kind of pants people will see it."

"Yes, but in those they'll be able to see the whole package. The whole wangdoodle, the whole twinkiewinkie."

"I swear you could fill a Webster's Dictionary with the synonyms you come up with for erections and penises." Rei muttered flatly.

Bryan suddenly appeared, striding towards the two with a curious expression, "What's this about the penis?"

Tala craned his head back and grinned at the lilac-haired man. "Oh, just talking about Rei's wang."

The subject of the conversation's face turned beet red and he promptly ducked back into the change room. "Fine! Off with the boner-revealing jeans!" Moments later the same jeans were tossed over the door and were caught by Tala.

"Aye, aye, aye, boy! You ought to let me pick out your clothes!"

"Hell no. You'd dress me like a stripper."

At this, the blue-eyed redhead chuckled knowingly, "Heh, well, that is sort of true…"

"Hence why I have taken the liberty of picking some things up." Kai announced, suddenly appearing behind both Bryan and Tala. Draped over one muscular arm was a series over shirts and pants, all expected to fit Rei. The tall twenty year-old strode towards Rei's stall and knocked on it. "Rei, I've got some better looking and better fitting clothes."

The raven-haired Nekojin cracked the door open a bit, allowing Kai only a sliver of sun-kissed skin stretched over a lithe yet muscled chest and stomach. At that precise moment Tala thought it would be funny to shove Kai forward, therefore knocking him into the door which in turn forced him inside the changeroom. The door swung shut with a click and Kai found himself straddling Rei who was sitting awkwardly in an uncomfortable chair in the corner of the stall. Kai's hand twitched as he realized that it was placed awfully far up on the younger's leg and he promptly removed it, only to have it placed on the small ledge of chair between Rei's legs.

Violet eyes roamed over sun-kissed skin, the owner of which clad in only a pair of black boxers. Kai felt his hand left to run across the smooth skin of Rei's chest, but he caught himself and it was shoved in his pocket as he abruptly stood.

"Sorry. Some people need to learn how to control themselves in public," The Hiwatari fortune heir raised his voice slightly and a snicker from Tala concluded that he'd heard.

"It's fine," Rei murmured as he too stood and began to gather the discarded clthes on the floor. "Were these in any particular order to try on?"

Kai took pause at the door. "No. Mix and match." He grunted before stepping out. Outside Kai grabbed the scarlet-haired culprit by the ear and yanked him down. "What the hell was that?" He hissed.

Tala grinned, despite the pain in his aud, "Just trying to lighten you up, or rather lighten up something else south of the border."

"I can do that just fine on my own, thank you." He growled before releasing the redhead and stalking off.

"Sex deprived, much?"

----Floccinaucinihilipilification----

Harr harr! Review or I shall… launch my missles stolen from Russia upon ye. Seriously.

…I like cheese.