Chapter 8:

He was released from the hospital on the 17th day after being submitted. Asami was eager to get him home, but Akihito still wasn't quite sure if he was ready.

A nurse came by every day to check on Akihito and to change his bandages. She made sure that he was eating and taking his medication. Akihito slept in Asami's bed every night. For the first week Asami was there every night, but he soon got busy with work again and their life slowly went back to being how it was before everything happened. Well kind of. Akihito was alone in the penthouse most days, eating his meals alone. He had been ordering in most days, especially the days he knew Asami would be home. The desire to cook still had not come back, and he used to love cooking. He had liked watching Asami eat the meals he cooked for him. When Asami was home he watched Akihito eat like a hawk. He even sometimes would feed Akihito himself if he felt that he hadn't consumed enough. Akihito knew he did it to make sure that he was eating. Beside the meals he ordered out, and the occasional toast, Akihito didn't eat much. His appetite was gone. Asami knew this. He mostly ate out of duty. Knowing that if he lost much weight it would cause Asami to worry more.

Akihito spent his time watching TV to distract himself from his thoughts. He had called his friends a few times to catch up with their lives. He hadn't seen them in a long time. Just hearing their voices made his chest ache. He wished that he could invite them over, but Asami already refused him. Asami also had already informed Akihito's work that he wouldn't be in for awhile. Sometimes he would pick up his camera, only to set it down again. He missed it. Missed his job, but both the nurse and Asami insisted that he wasn't ready to go back. Akihito knew that was only part of the reason. The other reason was because Asami didn't want him to leave the penthouse until he had taken care of Mika and Yuri. Despite knowing this, Asami didn't inform him on anything regarding the two, so Akihito had no idea when or even, if ever, he would be able to leave.

The nightmares were not occurring every time he fell asleep now. But still he woke most nights to Asami bent over him, shaking his trembling body that was covered with sweat. He was always unable to sleep afterwards, and would excuse himself to go watch television in the living room. Asami had tried to follow him the first few times, but Akihito refused him. He knew Asami needed his rest, as he also hardly slept, but mostly it was because he wanted to be alone. When would this end? Akihito thought. His body ached sometimes, and the wounds on his back and backside itched now and again. He put healing cream on the places he could reach and had the nurse do the rest.

In short, what Akihito felt the most was loneliness. Not that he expected Asami to be there every second of every day, but he felt as if Asami was avoiding him. Ever since he got home, even after the stitches had been taken out, Asami still had not touched Akihito. Not once. He didn't try anything. Sure, he would kiss Akihito, and they would cuddle at night, but the lack of physical intimacy was beginning to worry Akihito. Akihito was not that fragile, and it was starting to irritate him. Did Asami think him that weak? Perhaps Asami found him undesirable now that he had been so brutality tainted? He tried masturbating when Asami wasn't there, but he couldn't get into it. He couldn't feel anything. In the shower he would use his fingers and played with his hole, testing to see if there would be any pain, but nothing stuck out to him. Had he lost the ability to feel physical pleasure? But certainly that wasn't true. Whenever the kisses got too deep, just as Akihito was starting to feel even the slightest spark, Asami would stop in the middle, get up and walk away. Had Akihito done something to piss him off? It was now two weeks since the stitches had been taken out. Beside the late nights, and early mornings, Akihito hardly saw Asami. Akihito was starting to seriously worry. Did Asami not want him physically anymore?

It was a rare evening when Asami had gotten home from work early. He had not been home since the following evening. He probably hadn't slept at all, Akihito deduced. Despite this, Akihito was surprised to see him.

"You're back," Akihito said this from the couch with a hint of disbelief in his voice.

"Yeah," looking utterly exhausted.

"I didn't think you would be home so early, so I didn't order much food," he had ordered in Sushi for one.

"That's alright. I'm not much hungry," Asami said as he set his suitcase on the dining room table.

"Would you care to join me on the couch?"

"No, I'm going to shower," Asami said, walked over to Akihito, gave him a peck on the mouth then headed to the bedroom.

"Alright then." Akihito felt slightly disappointed.

When Asami came out of the shower, he sat next to Akihito wearing his bathrobe. He had put one arm around Akihito while the other hand held a glass of bourbon on ice.

"Discovery? Really?"

"Yeah, nothing else was on." Akihito snuggled up into the crook of his arm and looked up at him. He couldn't read his mind. Perhaps if he stared at him long enough he would be able to. What are you thinking?

"What?"

"Nothing." Why aren't you touching me? Was what he really wanted to ask. Akihito tilted his head in a way that it was like an offering to Asami. Kiss me. It had been too long since he had been touched by Asami. He had been used to having such an active sex life that the lack of it was making him realize just how much he had loved it before.

Asami took the bait, but again it was only a peck. Akihito blinked up at him. That's it! He thought. The disappointment was weighing on him, turning into hurt. Akihito looked down and he grabbed Asami's bourbon.

"Hey," Asami said, attempting to stop him, but Akihito had already swallowed. "I just poured that," and he gave a small chuckle at Akihito's attempt to cover his disdain for the brown liquid.

"I'll pour you another," Akihito got up and did just that. He handed it to Asami, but instead of sitting down again, Akihito climbed onto his lap, straddling him.

"What are-" Akihito didn't want to speak, he just wanted to feel. He leaned in, and before Asami could finish his sentence Akihito planted his mouth on Asami's. He started out slow, closed his eyes and sucked on Asami's lips. It didn't take long for Asami to respond and open his mouth. Akihito dove in with his tongue. He prodded the moist depth until he found what he was looking for. Their tongues intertwined, Akihito's saliva mixed with Asami's. His lips and tongue were so warm. Every now and then, the other would pause for a second to suck on the other's lip. Akihito was just starting to feel a bit tingly when Asami stopped and pushed Akihito away.

"Stop Akihito."

"Why?" Akihito wouldn't though and moved his lips to Asami's neck, his hand slowly crept inside Asami's robe, seeking Asami's heat. His hand stopped at his peck and he just started to rub his fingers against Asami's nipple when Asami grabbed his bandaged wrist, bringing it out of his robe.

"Why can't we?" Akihito was stricken with disbelief. Why!

"Because you're not fully healed," Asami said, he was only slightly out of breath.

"I'm healed enough."

"I don't think we should."

"I don't understand." Asami said nothing but stared into Akihito's eyes. "Am I no longer good enough for you?" Tears started to form in his eyes. "I knew it! It's because I'm dirty now. Isn't it!" Akihito pulled his hand away and got off of Asami's lap.

"That's-" Asami stood and put his drink down.

"It's fine. I get it. I wouldn't want to touch me either," now the tears really were falling, Akihito turned and started to walk away before Asami could see.

"Akihito," Asami came up behind him and wrapped him in his arms. "That's not it. That's not it at all. You're not dirty. I- I just-"

"What!"

"I don't want to hurt you! Your body is still recovering. You went through so much, I don't want you to get any worse. What you went through..."

"But I'm fine. My body is healed." Asami came around then and held up Akihito's wrists.

"Does this look healed to you?" Asami was getting frustrated. He couldn't say to him that it was because he didn't Akihito was mentally ready.

"That's different." Akihito immediately felt shame, followed by a blush.

"How?"

"The rest of my body is healed." Akihito wanted to say that his butt was fine, but couldn't muster the words.

"No, it's not," if anything, Asami was incredibly aware of what Akihito was insinuating.

"I can handle it. I just want you to touch me!"

Asami was taken aback. He lifted his hand then to stroke Akihito's cheek and wiped the tears away.

Anger boiled in him suddenly, and he swatted Asami's hand away. "Not like that!" Akihito pushed pass Asami and went into Asami's room, slammed the door, and crawled into bed.

It was a short while before Asami joined him. Akihito pretended to be asleep and Asami pretended to pretend he was sleeping. The cities lights outside the window illuminated the bedroom. A few minutes passed when Akihito sat up in rage and moved so he was on top of Asami once again. He quickly untied Asami's pajama bottoms and pulled them down.

"Akihito-" Asami made to stop him but Akihito swatted his hands away.

It was surprise that made him stop. Akihito caught his breath and he looked down at the growing erection and then up at Asami who just stared back at him, lips slightly parted, desire cast upon his face. Akihito was caught off guard when suddenly Asami sat up, cradled Akihito's head in his hands and he kissed Akihito with a passion that had been steadily building over the past month. Akihito accepted it all and he wrapped his arms around Asami's neck. Neither one of them knew how long it lasted for but both suddenly stopped, gasping for air. Asami rested his head against Akihito's forehead.

"Are you sure?"

Akihito couldn't answer though, he was still trying to regain his breath, so instead he slipped out of Asami's embrace and moved his whole body down. He needed to do this. He needed to prove himself. Without pausing, Akihito blew on the tip of Asami's shaft only to consume it in his mouth a second later.

"Ah!" Asami's legs suddenly twitched and he couldn't help but raise his head to the ceiling. His hands clutched at the sheets as Akihito's head bobbed up and down Asami's shaft. Sometimes Akihito would pause at the tip only to swivel his tongue around. Asami's member twitched in pleasure. Akihito had come a long way, Asami reflected.

Akihito cradled Asami's sack all the while continuing to draw on Asami. He traced his tongue along the side of Asami's shaft until he kissed the base. His hand and mouth switched places and Akihito sucked and slurped on his testicles, even nibbled now and then which caused Asami's body to spasm at the pleasurable pinch. Akihito looked up to see that Asami was using his arms to support himself on the bed. His face, his movements, how he reacted to Akihito suddenly made him feel hot. He could feel the tightness grow in his groin, and suddenly he felt relief. He had been so worried. The tingly sensation in his own body caused him to shiver. Akihito spread Asami's thighs a bit wider and moved his lips to Asami's inner thigh. He gently kissed the soft skin and he found a spot close to the conjoining part of his nether regions and he sucked the skin until he was sure it would leave a mark. Possession suddenly his motivation. Asami was his and no one else's, he reflected. All the while Akihito worked his hand up and down, changing the pace now and then, the foreskin moving with it. Akihito was sure he wouldn't last too much longer if he took him in his mouth once again.

"I'm going to suck you dry," Akihito said this and plunged Asami's sex back into his mouth. He looked up at Asami, locking in with his eyes. Asami's breath came out heavy. His face was glazed over with erotic bliss. Akihito changed to the tip, and took a second to breathe and blew his hot moist breath on it. Asami's felt his abs tighten and his body shivered. Without warning Asami brought his hands around to support, as well as also shove Akihito's mouth back down. His fingers intertwined with Akihito's hair. Asami's body started to move with the rhythm. Akihito continued to stare back into Asami's eyes as his pelvis moved, thrusting into Akihito's mouth until ecstasy took him.

"Akihito!" Asami released while his body convulsed.

Akihito continued to move and suck until he swallowed every last bit of Asami's seed. Akihito released him and slowly got up so he was straddling Asami once again. He rested his hands on Asami's lower abdomen where there was heat and beads of sweat. Some of the semen had escaped and had run down the side of his mouth, down to his chin. Akihito gazed as Asami, and watched as Asami's chest rose less heavily with each passing second as he regained some composure. His breath was still heavy, and his eyes were still glossy as they watched Akihito use the back of his hand to wipe off the seed that had spilled from his mouth. Akihito licked it, consuming the rest of Asami. Asami was entranced by the act. Asami moved to the bottom of Akihito's shirt and pulled it over his head. He stared at Akihito's fair, soft skin for a second. The bruises and welts were gone. His hands traced some of the healing cuts on his sides as Akihito stood for a second and pulled his boxers down. He knelt back down in Asami's lap and brought his arms around Asami's neck. He leaned in, covering his lips over Asami's, moving his mouth passionately. Asami responded and he brought his hands around to Akihito's hips, pulling him closer.

Akihito became ever more aware of his own erection and started to move his body against Asami's, grinding his manhood against Asami's limp one. Both lost track of time and only focused in the moment. How their bodies moved against each other, and how the heat and sweat being released mixed with the other's a moment later. Both would pause for just a second, maybe trace their tongue against the other's lips, if only to catch their breath before they continued. It didn't take long for Akihito to feel Asami's rising erection against his own. Asami released Akihito's lips and moved down so he could suckle and play with his nipples. Akihito tilted his head back at the pleasure. He could scarcely breathe when Asami moved his hand down to tug at Akihito's shaft and started to rub the tip of it with his thumb. He hadn't felt this way in a long time. He had missed Asami. He had missed his hands, mouth and body that always moved with care across his body. Akihito arched his back in a way that pushed his body up against Asami's. He clutched at Asami's head that nibbled at his nipple. Asami suddenly let go of Akihito's member and went back to cradle his hip only to move his and Akihito's entire body around. He was careful not to bump his foot. Without releasing his mouth from Akihito's nipple, he flipped Akihito so he was now on his back against the bed, underneath him.

"What a view," Asami paused to admire the form below him. "Mine." Akihito's face felt very warm suddenly.

Asami used his arms to spread Akihito's legs apart. He moved slowly, wanting to convey all the love he felt for Akihito in every stroke, kiss, and brush. Asami hadn't realized how much he had missed and yearned for this body that squirmed with pleasure underneath him. Asami moved one of his hands and placed a few of his fingers into Akihito's mouth, making Akihito suckle on them. His tongue danced against Asami's fingers, causing him to gather saliva. Asami lifted his head after a bit, thinking there was enough, and took out his fingers from Akihito's mouth only to move them so that they hovered just outside of Akihito's sphincter. He looked up at Akihito, looked into his eyes as he gently put one finger covered in Akihito's saliva against it, and slowly pushed in. Akihito's body didn't change. He had already done this himself, and yet, it was different when Asami did it, and he couldn't help but gasp. He looked down at Asami, his chest rose more rapidly by the second finger.

He wanted confirmation. He wanted to know that it was alright. They had gone through so much and still were getting through it together. Was it really time for this? Asami was still being woken up in the middle of the night due to Akihito's nightmares. He knew that Akihito was physically ready to do this, but he wasn't sure about the rest of it. Was Asami being selfish right now? Akihito had been trying to get him to have sex with him for quite a while, he knew, and Asami had to be on guard every time he was with him. The boy was not subtle, nor was he discreet as he would offer himself up, as if he were a dish that he wanted Asami to eat. Which indeed he did. Asami wanted to devour him. He would cave in sometimes only to remind himself in the middle of the kiss, right as he could feel himself get excited that Akihito was just not ready for this. Restraining himself these past two weeks had become painful. A few times he had to excuse himself to use the bathroom and relieve himself. The other day he had even masturbated at work, which he never did, but the thought of a naked Akihito, trembling in ecstasy beneath him, was even for him, too much to try and conceal. At times, just the sight of Akihito before his eyes got him excited. Asami was so conflicted on what he should do. He didn't want to push him. Asami was so afraid he would lose Akihito if he tried too hard. Should he stop this before he made it worse?

"Asami…" Akihito said between breaths. Perhaps this was a cure. Maybe this was what Akihito needed to get over the incident. Make him forget. Asami's mind was becoming clouded, and he didn't want to think any more.

Asami moved his finger in and out as his mouth moved to Akihito's other nipple. He used his free hand to twist and flick the now vacant nipple. His mouth consumed the already hard nipple and he sucked on it until it became soft and swollen, only to let go and blow on it. He watched as the nipple shriveled again only to repeat the process, nibbling and biting at the bright red pebble on top, causing Akihito to arch his back. Asami put in another finger and another in order to stretch and prepare him for the biggest intruder. It was unsurprising tight, yet Akihito was still accepting him. His insides sucking in his fingers. His whole body inviting him in. Asami moved until he found the spot he was all too familiar with, causing Akihito to call out. He grinned, knowing he had found his weakness.

"Ah, Asami," Asami looked up as Akihito arched his back again and clutched the bed sheets. "More, please… more."

Asami was unable to take it anymore. With Akihito's face so erotic, and his body moved so wantonly, how could he resist such a feast.

"Where?" Asami asked teasingly.

"You know where… AH!"

"Here?" he said and inserted a fourth finger. Akihito said nothing but nodded. Asami moved then so he was more comfortably on his knees, he took out his fingers only to shove them back into Akihito's mouth. It only took a second, and when he brought his fingers out they were covered with more saliva. Asami pushed some into Akihito's hole and rubbed the rest off at the entrance, there was surprisingly a lot, all the while gathering his own saliva to wrap around his cock. He pulled Akihito's hips closer to him, stretching his legs wider apart. Asami moved forward, supporting one hand on the side of the bed close to Akihito's head. They stared at one another.

"You smell nice," Akihito reflected between breaths. Because of the incident, Asami had changed his cologne and even his body soap. This was not the first time that Akihito had made note of this. Although Akihito missed the old scent, he had to admit that Asami's new scent almost irresistible. Akihito found himself at times, when they cuddled, just enjoying sniffing him.

Asami smirked, enjoying the compliment. Asami watched as Akihito's face changed when Asami grabbed himself and started to brush the tip of his shaft against Akihito's opening. His body trembled beneath Asami, and instinctively he parted his legs even wider. His eyes gazed at him in a way that was begging.

Akihito brought his shaky hand down, so it covered the one that Asami was using to tease him. He tried to force Asami to shove it inside him. He enjoyed watching Akihito squirm and beg for him.

"Asami … please…" without a second thought Asami kissed Akihito and thrust into him. He didn't know what to expect. Akihito's body welcomed him, clung to him. Asami couldn't help but let out a gasp. Had it always felt this good inside him? The heat inside him enveloped Asami. Akihito's eyes widened at the sudden invasion. Asami used his free hand to rub Akihito's staff. Asami began to move slowly, not wanting to hurt him. Soon Akihito began to move with him and matched Asami with each thrust.

"It feels so good inside you Akihito," Asami said as his body moved and shook with pleasure, his breath becoming unsteady and rapid.

"It feels so good when you're inside me," Akihito responded by wrapping his legs around Asami's. Their hot breaths mixed together. Akihito attempted to stifle his voice and he clutched at his pillow. This was it. This was everything Akihito wanted.

"I want to hear your voice," when Asami said this Akihito turned back to him, and just at that moment Asami hit his sweet spot. Akihito's arms came around to clutch at Asami's back. His fingers dug into his skin but Asami didn't even notice. Asami thrust in with a hard passion. Akihito was back and finally his again. They moved faster and harder. They felt the pressure building, to the point it was almost painful. Akihito was on the brink and he met Asami with one final deep thrust until he clenched his toes and released.

"Uugh!" Akihito head pushed and tilted back into the pillow. He was panting. Akihito's pace began to slow but he still moved for Asami. Asami had felt that last clutch of Akihito's. It had sent an electric shock through his member. Asami couldn't hold it any longer and he came inside Akihito while calling his name. Asami's whole body clenched and suddenly he could do nothing but collapse on top of Akihito. The seed that spilled from Akihito was warm against Asami's stomach. Neither one of them made an attempt to wipe it away.

They laid like that for a minute until Asami came out of Akihito. He rolled onto his back, bringing Akihito with him. Akihito snuggled up against him, his body half covering Asami's. His head and hand rested on Asami's chest while his leg lay across Asami's leg. He didn't know what to expect but his body still shook slightly. Akihito listened as Asami's heartbeat went back to being at a normal pace. It was calming his body and was slowly lulling him to sleep.

"Asami?" Asami had been staring up at the ceiling while his arm that wrapped around his Akihito traced his fingers aimlessly across his shoulder and arm, attempting to calm Akihito's trembling body.

"Hm?"

"Thank you," Asami's fingers paused. Why was Akihito thanking him? If anything, it should be the other way around, but Asami couldn't speak the words. He looked down at his Akihito, saw that his eyes were closed. His body was finally still. This was the first moment, since they had gotten back from the hospital, that Akihito was completely and utterly relaxed. Asami kissed the top of Akihito's head, and continued to trace his arm as his own eyes became heavy. He was utterly spent. He felt the smile across his face. It didn't take long for he himself to drift off to sleep.